Set yourself free
Hi I am 40 year old female, married with two kids. It has been 13 years of my marriage with nothing into it. I gave 13 years of my life with a person who has no emotions or feelings for me. He is just an arrogant and selfish mumma’s boy. There is no physical violence or fight in our marriage and I think that’s simply because we dont talk, we hardly communicate.
I have been trying to avoid confrontation through these years, just to maintain peace. However when I tried to confront him, we got into fight and he tried to overcome these confrontation by saying some toxic statements or just by blaming me.
I am working, independent, taking care of my kids myself. I dont know why am I staying in this marriage when there is nothing into it. He and his family makes me feel unwanted and invisible. I dont feel heard or seen. I feel I am just staying at my in laws home as a paying guest, where I am doing all my and my kids chores by myself and there is no one to talk or mingle with.
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Through these years I hardly know anything about his friends, or past life or even about his family issues. I even dont know about his passwords, or anything intimate which no one knows.
We are neither bonded physically nor emotionally. He never shared anything about his family or made me feel special. He is happy with me when his mother is happy with me. He doesn’t even want to come to his room. It doesn’t matter to him even if I am upset or angry.
Due to his this attitude, I was always dominated by my mother in law. I never felt like being a couple.
Now I just want to get free. I just want freedom for me and my two kids. I dont want anything from him. He doesnt deserve us. But we deserve life, happiness, success and family bonding. Me with my two kids, make a happy and healthy family.
I dont know whether anyone will ever read this blog or not. I dont know whether I wrote it correctly or not, but I know one thing that I just wrote my emotions down here. If someone reads it, then please share your thoughts.
