The Greener Grass on The Other Side | Freecia Ep. 3
Thinking about the earthworms living in the soil where the grass has grown.
Have you ever heard the idiom that says the grass is always greener on the other side? Bet you have.
I stumbled upon an analogy that explains the idiom mentioned above really well. I quoted from the book titled “The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read” by Philippa Perry. By the time I write this essay, I haven’t even finished reading the book yet (I’m currently halfway through), but I can’t wait to pour out my thoughts on it.
Perry tells us in her book an analogy that altered my brain chemistry and created new synapses. So, I made this improved narration so we can live in the analogy together. Let’s imagine:
- Imagine ourselves as a building… and we step into that building; now we are inside the main chamber.
- Imagine the main chamber as the front desk/receptionist/lobby where information is accessible to the guests.
- On each lateral side of the main chamber, there are doors to the other chambers. One is on the left wing, and the other is on the right wing.
- The doors are locked, and we are the only masters of those chambers.
- We head to the left chamber and open the door. It’s drizzly and windy inside. We witness all the struggling moments, every drop of tears of sadness, hardship, humility, and hopelessness. We see our desperation and devastation, cluelessly believing our life would end in that exact moment. Now take a step back out of the left chamber and lock the door.
- Now we head in the opposite direction, to the third chamber on the right wing, and open its door. Hundreds of butterflies burst out as the door opens, a ray of sunshine hitting our eyes, and bird chirps greet our ears. Upon our eyes, the chamber shows all moments of happiness, pride, relief, and serenity. Now take a step back out of the right chamber and lock the door.
The point is that the “greener grass” only represents the main chamber. It doesn’t simply mean that our vision or our perspective of the greener grass on the other side is fallacious. It’s true, but it’s just not the whole story, unless we have access to someone else’s secret chambers.
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All this time, I’ve never thought more profoundly about that idiom. Superficially, I only consider it as a reminder that whatever we do, there’s always someone else who does it better than we do. No matter how many things we have, there’s always someone else who has so much more than us. It reminds us that our assumed-less-green grass and the greenest grass on the other side do not justify our whole level. We can never put an end to it if we are comparing ourselves to someone else. That’s how most of us interpret the meaning of that idiom, right?
According to The Cambridge Dictionary, the idiom means: “something that you say that means that other people always seem to be in a better situation than you, although they may not be.”
Let me highlight the “although they may not be” here. This phrase is actually debatable (for me). It implies that it may not be green… or they may not be in a better situation. I feel like it’s not our place to say whether they may be or not. I found it a lil bit hard to put my thoughts into words… I want to imply another perspective of this idiom. It’s not a bad thing to acknowledge that someone else has done better than us (in some aspects), cause it’s a valid feeling, even if it always seems like that (for some of us).
We’ve been mostly focused on the color of the grass. But what we often overlook is: How fertile is the soil where the grass is growing? How much water does the owner pour on it? How great is the fertilizer they use? How many earthworms support it? And how well is the protection so that nothing can threaten and destroy the grass? How long has the grass been planted? Well, turns out these are what we should be focused on. Besides, how can we compare things that grow in different “areas” in the first place with only one measurement?
Well, my thought is actually not opposing how the idiom has been interpreted all this time; I merely express some new thoughts I’ve come up with after reading the book (or I feel like my head will explode). Lastly, I love that Perry mentions in almost every chapter of her book that the newly received knowledge is not for us to degrade our past selves. It’s not about the past; it’s about the future and how we overcome it.
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(/ayac)
