TECHIE
“Techie.”
Yea, that’s what everyone calls me now.
It isn’t really surprising though because at every phase of my life, I’ve somehow always had a nickname. They usually have something to do with my name, my voice or just my behaviour.
In primary school, it was simply Tomboy.
Then came secondary school. Somehow, just like Mr. Ayo, everybody clocked that all three of my names started with the letter M. Something I had never clocked myself, never really paid attention to or attached any meaning to.
So I went from Makinde Mariam Mayokun to MMM, and somehow that graduated to Money Making Machine. Don’t ask me how. Secondary school students are just… creative.
Then came my first university. There, I was basically Mayor.
To people that were my love interests, I was Mikun or Makun.
But Techie?
Techie came from somewhere called nowhere.
Well… not exactly nowhere.
I’ll get there.
Before I tell you my nickname story, I should probably introduce myself properly.
My name is Oluwamayomikun, but these days I keep it simple by saying Techie.
I’m the only child of the marriage between a jazz-loving Chemistry professor and a woman who has somehow lived multiple lives. At different points, she has been a teacher, a trader and, yes, even a geriatric nurse.
I love my parents dearly.
The only thing I probably love a tiny bit more than my parents is a new episode of The Blacklist. Reddington said “Life is a game, my dear. Play it to win, or don’t play at all.”
Now, back to Techie.
The funniest thing ever happened the first time somebody actually called me that in real life. I was at Idia Hall.Conqueror saw me from afar and shouted,“Techieeeee!”I didn’t answer.
Why would I?
How could I possibly know she was talking to me? To me, Techie was just a WhatsApp username fgs! Oh. That was the first time it really hit me that people actually knew me as Techie.
Funny enough, Tech is nowhere close to why I picked the name in the first place.
That story starts in OAU. Back then, my male best friend, Kolawole Emmanuel, stayed in AWO Hall. Somehow, AWO became my nest too.
Get Techie’s stories in your inbox
Join Medium for free to get updates from this writer.
If you couldn’t find me in my hostel, there was a very good chance I was in AWO disturbing Emma’s peace. One particular night, Emma couldn’t see me off to Mozambique Hall like he normally did. Not because he didn’t want to.
We had both eaten the famous “spagewa” he cooked and somehow managed to sleep off immediately after. Till today, I don’t know whether it was the food or the stress.
I eventually woke up, hugged Emma goodbye, plugged in my headphones and started the two-minute walk back to Mozambique. Completely forgetting that my unofficial guardian angel wasn’t walking beside me.
I was this close to being hit by a car.
Thankfully, one guy called Ifeoluwa pulled me out of the way.It honestly felt like one of those dramatic movie scenes. Very funny now.
Not funny then.
He walked me all the way to Mozambique Hall and gave me one piece of advice that has stayed with me ever since.
“If you’re plugged in, don’t press your phone. If you’re pressing your phone, don’t plug in” Simple,Practical and I’ve never forgotten it.
When we got to Mozambique, he wanted us to gist a little, I genuinely couldn’t. If I could have slept in AWO without all the Aro boys drama, I probably would have because I was exhausted.Not funny then.He walked me all the way to Mozambique Hall and gave me one piece of advice that has stayed with me ever since.Instead, he asked for my name, my department, my phone number. And because I was still very innocent, I told him.
I mean, what exactly is someone supposed to do with just your name, department and phone number, right? Apparently…A lot.
Two days later, Ife called me and said we had to meet.I was confused but I went anyway.Then he casually told me that while trying to search for information about me, he somehow got access to my school portal.
Not only that…He accidentally deleted my biodata.How do you even gain access to somebody’s portal with just their name? I honestly don’t know whether I was more impressed or more terrified. Probably terrified.
Right there and then, I decided strangers really didn’t need to know my actual name anymore.I needed a nickname, one that had absolutely nothing to do with any of my names.
So I got home and started brainstorming with my mum.We threw around different ideas for a while until she randomly looked at me and said, “Techie ni e na.” simply You are a Techie. My mum is always fascinated when I solve her phone issues and I guess her conclusion makes sense.
That was it! I liked it and I changed my WhatsApp username immediately. That should have been the end of the story but it wasn’t.
Fast forward to the EOT Post-UTME group. At the time, I genuinely didn’t want anybody there knowing my actual name, so I simply left my WhatsApp name as Techie and people started calling me Techie. I didn’t bother correcting them.
Before I knew it…Everybody knew me as Techie.
At first, I honestly didn’t like it.I was used to being Mayor. Whenever somebody called “Techie”, there was always a split second where I’d think,“Oh… they’re talking to me.”
Eventually, it became normal, now it’s the opposite.I genuinely feel strange when somebody I barely know calls me Oluwamayomikun. Suddenly there was Techieola,Techieoluaa.
Looking back now, it’s funny how a nickname I created just to protect my identity somehow became a bigger part of my identity than my actual name. Life has a very weird sense of humour.
Who’s Techie? I study Pharmacy on the side.
I’m the Team Lead at Kanvise, an EdTech platform that revolutionise virtual tutorials. In the next decade, Kanvise will be the operation system of all virtual tutorials and tutors in Africa.
I’m also a Product Marketer, I spend a ridiculous amount of time thinking about products, branding, startups and ideas. And before you’re disappointed, No I cannot write one single line of code.
The irony isn’t lost on me either.
Funny enough, if you shout “Oluwamayomikun” in a crowd, I might actually need a second. But shout “Techie!”
I’ll answer before you even finish the “ie.”
