On Keeping Promises to Yourself
Redefining What It Means to Work Out
Working out is not a personality trait.
Let’s repeat that — working out is not a personality trait.
One more time for the person in the back. Working out…
Just kidding, that’s enough.
Anyway, I’ve had to challenge this assumption, or perhaps excuse , for quite some time. For some of us, we associate working out with a specific type of person, group, or entire personality.
Some people take this false concept and run with it: “gym rat,” “meathead,” “swole bros.” The embarrassing list goes on and on.
And maybe these people don’t have a personality? 🤣
No, but in all seriousness, there’s a very legitimate psychological barrier for people who don’t identify with the bloody CrossFit vibes, the older white women Pilates club, and so forth. Bottom line: it causes visceral reactions like, “That’s just not me.”
But that’s nonsense.
Movement and fitness groups are two totally separate concepts. We don’t generally say, “I’m not a brushing-my-teeth person” or “I’m not a drinking-water person.” Some things aren’t expressions of personality. They’re simply ways we maintain ourselves.
Maybe most importantly, you don’t have to love these things for them to belong in your life.
At the end of the day, movement is self-care.
Often, self-care gets associated with candles, massages, skincare, treats, and chilling out. And trust me… I love those things.
But sometimes self-care is:
I said I would walk for a mile today, so I’m going to walk a mile.
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Not punishment. Not earning food. Not chasing a smaller body.
Just internal accountability.
External accountability says: My trainer is expecting me. Someone will notice if I don’t go.
Internal accountability says: Nobody would know if I quit, and I’m still going to show up anyway.
That’s where exercise becomes bigger than exercise. Every small promise kept becomes evidence that your own word means something to you. The goal isn’t proving that you’re hardcore enough to claim a fitness identity.
It’s asking: Do I feel better moving or not moving?
You don’t need the “right” body, clothes, athletic history, or aesthetic.
You can be awkward at the gym and still exercise.
Inconsistent lately?
Begin again.
I don’t know, maybe the most important muscle I’m building isn’t visible.
I’ve always taken pride in my brain. But lately, I’ve been realizing that taking care of my brain also means challenging it. My brain likes the status quo. It likes what’s familiar. It sometimes tries to convince me that staying exactly where I am is the same thing as keeping me “safe.”
Movement challenges that.
Every time I move when my brain would rather stay comfortable, I’m strengthening something beyond my body. I’m practicing the connection between what I tell myself I’m going to do and what I actually do.
I want to prove to myself that I can rely on myself.
I want my mind and body to feel like teammates, not two separate entities constantly negotiating with each other.
And maybe that’s what discipline can look like; discipline is not punishment, rigidity, or becoming one of those people whose entire personality revolves around protein intake.
Maybe discipline can simply mean keeping promises to yourself.
Working out doesn’t have to become who you are. It can simply be one of the ways you remind yourself that you’re worth showing up for.
