At a car shop some days ago, I sat on the left side of a beautiful woman dressed nicely, as I waited to get some oil in my Honda. My three little musketeers were with me chatting away loudly, not caring much about the people at the shop, lost in their own world of pretend play, each one of them pretending to be a hero from the PJ Masks world.

She was telling me how charming my kiddos were. Then she told me a bit of a story. How she had three kids herself, only that they were now in their forties. She had six grandkids now, she said. I was taken aback really. I confessed to her that she looked nothing like her age.

“It flies by fast,” she replied.

“Everyone says that,” I answered.

But the truth is when we’re in the tiny space of a nanosecond, experiencing that short moment in time, we often tend to forget that we are investing in the future. It was a good reminder for me to know that 10 years from now, I will be looking back at my “Masterpiece.”

I have been around a lot of mothers, and I have seen the strength, the tears, and the laughter. I have seen much hope, but I have also seen hopelessness and fear, sometimes all these emotions are stacked one on top the other inside the same human being. A mix of feelings. Triumph and defeat. Victory and loss. Happiness and solemness. Acceptance and rejection. Faith and lack of faith.

I am certain that you’ve heard recent talks about mental health awareness. Very normal people can harbor a mix of emotions.

But we don’t have to let defeat take over. I have seen God do the impossible in my life when there seemed to be no way. I am sure you can confirm that, if you think back on your life’s story, you’ll find that some things you thought were too hard for you to accomplish, you achieved them eventually.

Life is like a marathon, you have to keep going strong to finish the race because if you give up, you will not have a testimony of success.

But today’s post is about 10 years from now. Have you ever been transported to the future? And if you have (in your mind), have you ever looked back at your masterpiece?

Friend, I am telling you right now that someday you will have a masterpiece because you are in the process of creating one right now.

You may not realize it yet, but right now, you are standing in front of an easel with a paintbrush in your hand and a paint bucket at your feet. With every choice you make, you are painting an image. You are raising your hands and making beautiful and sometimes ugly swirls on the easel. You are choosing between primary colors and gently coupling them to create secondary and tertiary colors.

Every choice we make is important.

We have a lot of boxes to check daily. Our days are monitored by To-Dos and To-Buy Lists. Our homes are filled with sounds of laughter and screams of joy. And we often forget to stop and reflect on the purpose of why we are HERE. Today’s post is to make you stop. Pause. Reflect. Because 10 years from now, you will be looking back at this masterpiece.

Let me give you an example, if you have a child right now and it seems like you are making a billion trillion sacrifices, I want to remind you that you will see the fruits of your labor years from now. NOT today!

So it may seem like a little bit of a mess right now, but you are creating a masterpiece. God has the ‘vantage point’ because He is on the mountain top and you may be in the valley. He has seen everything — the paths before you and the ones you have already trodden. And most importantly, He sees you right now as you splash the paint across the easel.

So when faced with a choice (maybe the very minute after reading this), what will you decide? Let me give you a single idea. Here it is:

“Go against the norm if it’s a choice led by God’s spirit.”

Nobody wants to hear this. Be different, and you will get a stare-down. But the woman with the alabaster box, she went against the norm when she broke that vase and anointed the feet of Jesus.

The fact is you are “called out.”

1 Peter 2:9 says, “But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvelous light.”

So it really doesn’t benefit you as a child of God to try to fit in.

If the Holy Spirit is leading you in a certain direction, please don’t shy away from it. That’s where your masterpiece lies. God’s plans are perfect!

10 years from now, you will look back at your masterpiece. And I pray you will be thankful that you trusted God today for your tomorrow.

Trust Him today. Trust Him for triumph and NOT defeat. For victory and NOT loss. Trust Him for every step and every radical decision you make (that is Holy Spirit-led of course).

Today, I just want to use this opportunity to cheer you on for the Godly choices you are about to make!!! Be bold. Be unique. Go forth!

Originally published at lovedbymyfather.com on August 31, 2018.

I am unraveling the seventh piece of crumpled paper. I think I will use this one. It is getting dark and I am mentally exhausted from rewriting this letter over and over again. Whatever I wrote in this last one will have to do.

I am taking too long to read it. The tremor in my right hand is back, so I can’t stay still long enough to read the words.

I think I have forgotten how to read.

I envy the silence in my bedroom, oh, it is just deafening. Instead of quiet, the first sentence on the page is screaming out, begging to be free.

I am moving my lips as I read the words, but frankly, no sound is coming out. Maybe the truth is, I really don’t want to read it out loud. Because once I do, it will stick to the confines of my brain like glue on paper. Like nail on wood. Once I say these words out loud, they will become me.

I am trying really hard not to cry.

The first sentence reads:

“I am sorry.”

But the thing is, I cannot justify why I am sorry. For what really?

Maybe I should just say…

I am sorry for being me.

I am sorry that my words don’t match your thoughts. I am sorry that I just like to say it how I see it.

The other day, we were both having a random conversation. It was raining and we canceled the plans we had made earlier to go downtown. The sound of our laughter often brings trouble. But not on that night. It was a serious night. I watched as you waited for me to say something. And when I finally spoke, I saw your face go red with rage. I surveyed your face, perplexed about how your beautiful smile quickly grew into a monstrous emoji.

I am sorry that sometimes we don’t think alike.

Some days, you see fire when I see water. You see dandelions and I see roses. You point to danger and I walk through it just fine. Some days, when you are strong, I am weak. But when I dare to be bold, you perform a disappearing act and hide under your big, old blanket.

I am sorry that, sometimes, we don’t agree.

You told me your opinion that night and I dared to scrutinize it. You shared your worries and I played the antagonist. I outlined my reasons and you told me I was mad.

Did you know that I cried on countless occasions? I was ashamed. Why am I annoyingly different from you? The good thing is you never saw the tears so you just assumed I was fine. It was so easy to cry along with the water from the shower sprinkler. I made sure you never knew. But I’ve always wondered though, about why our opinions clashed that night.

But, now, dear friend, I know who I am. I know my name.

The real words I want to say are these.

I am NOT sorry. I will never be sorry for who my Father says I am. Don’t you agree?

I think I will be me. I am now really comfortable with seeing roses when you see dandelions. I will no longer think I am blind when I see water and you see fire. In my weakness, His strength is made perfect. In my unashamed emotionalism, His name is glorified. Even when I don’t understand why you take the other standpoint, I won’t fight it. Unapologetic. I’ll stand firm with reason.

I promise to lose myself only in His word and His truth.

No, I am not sorry.

This is me. This is my unapologetic coming of age. I hope you find yours.

Originally published at lovedbymyfather.com on February 3, 2018.

For 12 years, I’ve poured the proverbial blood, sweat, and tears on hundreds of pages and platforms. I have sowed seeds like a desperate farmer praying for harvest.

The seeds buried in the ground can tell their own story. Mostly, they fell on good, moist soil. But at other times, sadly, they fell on very shallow ground. Deaf ears that did not quicken. Weak legs that could not run. Blind eyes that could not see. And in a lot of cases, it was the farmer’s own deaf ears, weak legs, and blind eyes. This is not at all about the harvesters, but the farmer’s own weaknesses.

On some occasions, the scorching sun was blamed for their respite from growth. They sprouted for a little bit and then they died. There is nothing like the heat in the wilderness. Almost no one survives it.

In good seasons, those seeds grew and became tall. They flourished. They lived to see yet another day. They were happy, joyful, and brave. Only bravery can make you go forth to “accomplish.” Only bravery can slap deaf ears into function. Only bravery can make weak legs run. Only bravery can open the eyes of the blind.

Why do I write? I will answer simply.

I write, not because I’m better than most, but because I know “better” exists.

And so, I seek His face to find “better.” Because “better” is not by my strength.

I am not better than you. What a self-righteous joke that would be. I’m not better than anyone. I write, not because I’m perfect, but because I have an imperfect message. A broken girl saved by a super hero who gives her the option of never ever thirsting again.

I write because I…am ME. I write because I am me. He created me to do this. He gave me the passion. He created me to have a voice — for better, or for worse. When I see a blank piece of paper, it gives me joy. It presents me with countless opportunities to create something out of nothing. It reminds me that out of darkness came light. Out of emptiness came something beautiful.

I write because I believe in community. I believe in fellowship. I believe in shared experiences. I believe in love.

I write because I know that no matter how crazy life gets, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. I write to banish hopelessness. I write to eliminate slavery of the mind. I write to declare that my readers are free and that it is their choice and their perspective.

Ultimately, I write because of you. I’ll do it for as long as I live.

Happy New Year to you.

Wow! It’s 2018! Can you believe it? It’s a blessing to have made it to this year. Christmas was spent with sweet lingering smells of holiday cooking which included jollof rice, my family of five posing in front of our decorated Christmas tree for our annual Christmas photos, and visiting wonderful friends. Some days later, the new year swept us off our feet and with feelings of anticipation, we prayed, did a countdown, and finally screamed, “Happy New Year” while watching the famous ball drop in New York right from our TV set.

Once more, most of us have gone into a deep reflective mode to consider what we want our 2018 to look like. If you’ve said, “This year, I’m going to do X, Y, and Z,” then you are in the right place. You’re part of the gang. However, before you read further, I want you to carve something really important inside your heart — God alone sees the vantage point. He saw your story even before it was written. He knew your story before you were born, He knows the intricate details of where you are right now, and He is ordaining your story for the future. What an amazing God if we can just trust Him with our lives.

Still, You Need to Make Choices

Now, let’s get to it. God has the vantage point, but He created us in His image and He wants us to make choices. Trusting in Him is not enough. Faith without action is unbelief. When you believe, you will take one step forward with Him.

But how will you make the right choices? You may be asking this question right now.

The Answer Lies in Your Uniqueness

I’ve noticed something very unique about me. Whenever I try to fit into somebody else’s pants, it doesn’t work out. Whenever I am not myself, it backfires. But whenever I listen to the voice of God, whenever I meditate on what God wants me to do to fulfill my purpose in this world, that’s when everything starts to make sense. You know, the peace of God is always there when you’re walking in His will, but when you choose to ignore Him, you will find that everything will become chaotic.

So in 2018, what scenarios do we really want to experience and what temperament do we want our hearts to be in? Would we prefer our hearts to be totally submerged in the peace of God or to be engaged in a series of unsettling chaotic warfare? The answer lies within you.

Today, I am going to show you how what you will do this year, 2018, will be part of your life’s story and I’m going to explore this by comparing your story to one woman’s story and how she affected what happened a certain night when Jesus was in Bethany at a friend’s house for dinner some days before his death (Matthew 26:6–13).

One Woman’s Choice and How it became Her Life’s Story

Jesus was having dinner at Simon’s house and, all of a sudden, this woman comes dashing through the doors with only one mission in her mind. Bold-faced, set like a flint, her single mission was to pour a very expensive jar of oil on the head of the Son of God.

So she walked right to where He was seated, not minding the horrible stares she got from people. Imagine the looks on their faces. The shock. The disdain. She took off the lid, tilted the jar, and started pouring this really expensive oil on the head of Jesus. Keep in mind that in this setting, pouring oil on someone’s head was highly symbolic. It was considered as a preparation for an important role, for example, a king’s head would generally be anointed with oil before he was given access to his throne.

She was obviously showing respect and honor. At that very hour, she felt so strongly that this was the right thing to do. And she did not do it cheaply. I understand this woman because many times in my life, I’ve felt so strongly about something I had to do that it made my heart feel like it was on fire. I’ve felt so strongly about things I had to do that are not considered to be the norm. Things that would make you turn your head, but I just knew I was meant to do them.

So let’s continue our story.

After she poured the oil on His head, the disciples started complaining. They murmured amongst themselves that she should have sold the oil in the market and the money should have been given to the poor. They asked Jesus, “Don’t you think what this woman did was wasteful? Why would she do such a thing?” But Jesus simply told them that she did it to prepare Him for His burial. He added that wherever the gospel would be told in the future, what this woman did will be mentioned to remember her. Hmm.

Are You Getting the Picture?

A lot of times, we want to stick to the traditional practices (which may not make much sense to you) that have been going on for years and years. We don’t want to do anything differently that will be frowned upon, and we fear that what we do would be considered weird or crazy.

Please, let me ask you today. Was that woman crazy? Or did she do what no one else had done to fulfill her own purpose? What will you do in 2018 that is “uniquely YOU?” Ask yourself, “What can I do that God wants me to do in 2018? What has God specifically called me and just me alone to do? What can I do for my home (or family, or career, or brand) that God wants me to do in 2018?”

You Are Not Other People

It doesn’t matter whether other people have done it before. It doesn’t matter whether people have not done it before. It doesn’t matter whether it’s part of a tradition. It doesn’t matter whether you’re sticking to the same things that people have done over centuries or if you’re suddenly breaking away this year.

What matters is that your heart is totally submerged in the peace of God and that there is no chaos surrounding your decision. That’s all that matters, people, in the large scope of things. Think about the big picture. Think about your legacy. God’s peace concerning your decision is all that matters this year.

Finally, I want to encourage you to really meditate on what will be part of your life’s story as a wife, as a mother, as a woman, as an individual, and let me tell you something…girlfriend, just do it. Be like that woman who poured oil on Jesus’ head. You don’t owe anyone an explanation. But you owe it to yourself to be who God has created you to be.

Take Action: Many years down the line, what you will accomplish in 2018 will be part of what people will say about your overall story. You only have a window to do it, so I want to encourage you that you should go forth and do what God has called you to do and be everything that God has called you to do in 2018.

Happy new year to you.