By Majdi Haroun, CTO for living & Physicist by Training

Origially published on my linkedIn page

Introduction: Two Worlds, One Insight

I live in two worlds. One is digital — where I architect observability solutions using platforms like Dynatrace to bring clarity to complex systems. The other is quantum — where I trained as a physicist exploring the strange, probabilistic nature of reality. And recently, I found myself unable to ignore the uncanny parallels between these seemingly disparate domains.

What if the way we “observe” our systems digitally is not so different from how we understand physical systems in quantum mechanics?

What if monitoring an application isn’t just about collecting metrics, but about collapsing a superposition of digital states into a single, measurable truth?

Observation as Collapse: From Superposition to Root Cause

In quantum physics, a system can exist in multiple states simultaneously — this is called superposition. It’s only when we observe the system that its wavefunction collapses into a single state.

Our modern distributed systems behave in similar ways. When an incident occurs, the cause could be any number of things: a failing database connection, a memory leak, a network hop gone wrong. Until we observe it — until we measure it — the system exists in a cloud of possibilities.

Observability platforms like Dynatrace collapse that uncertainty. Through smart instrumentation, dependency mapping, and anomaly detection, they reveal what actually happened. The unknown becomes known.

Does Observing Change the System? Yes — In Both Worlds

In quantum mechanics, observation alters the system. That’s not just poetic — it’s physics. The measurement disturbs what it measures.

The same holds true for digital observability. Instrumentation adds overhead. Logging can change timing. Even real-user monitoring slightly alters the client experience.

So, we must ask: Are we ever seeing the “true” behavior of the system? Or just how it behaves under observation?

The Observer’s Bias: Curating Our Reality

In both quantum physics and observability, the observer is not neutral.

What we choose to monitor defines what we understand about a system. If you only measure infrastructure metrics, you’ll miss user experience. If you focus only on error rates, you may overlook latency spikes.

Our dashboards are curated realities — limited by what we choose to see, influenced by assumptions and design.

The Uncertainty Principle of Digital Systems

Heisenberg told us that we can’t know a particle’s position and momentum with perfect precision. In digital systems, we face a similar dilemma:

• You can have high-resolution traces OR wide observability coverage — but not both at once without cost.
• You can trace every span in every service — but your storage bill (and system overhead) will spike.

There’s always a trade-off between granularity, breadth, and system impact.

Entanglement and Causality: Why Root Cause is Never Local

Entanglement means two particles, even when separated by vast distances, can instantly affect each other. In distributed systems, services are similarly entangled:

• A slow function in a third-party API can ripple across services, impacting user experience downstream.
• Dynatrace’s causal AI understands these chains, identifying how a slowdown here causes a failure there.

Why AI is the New Quantum Instrument

Just as no human can intuitively grasp quantum systems, no engineer can grok every interaction in a microservices mesh.

AI becomes our quantum microscope. It surfaces patterns, automates insight, and scales beyond human limitation.

Observability without AI is like trying to measure quantum states with a yardstick.

Next Chapter: The four shifts

As we explore the evolving meaning of observability in the context of intelligent, adaptive systems, it becomes clear that we’re not just adjusting tools — we’re confronting a shift in how we understand digital reality itself. Observability is no longer a passive act of measurement; it’s becoming an act of participation in a living, evolving system.

This realization invites us to take a step back — not just to analyze the architecture or tooling — but to reflect on the very nature of what we are building and observing. The line between system and observer, between action and insight, is blurring. And with the emergence of agentic AI, this line may dissolve entirely.

In the next installment of this post to frame this shift, I will explore four mental shifts that emerge — each offering a lens for understanding what observability must become in a world of intelligent, decision-making systems.

When Schrödinger Meets Your Microservices: The Quantum Nature of Observability was originally published in RethinkingDigital on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

I remember spearheading a major infrastructure overhaul at a global media company, where the MoM concept was practically sacred. Everyone relied on it to centralize data from various operational tools — just like countless enterprises have done for years. But as our hybrid cloud environments grew more complex, it became glaringly obvious: MoM’s rigid, top-down approach wasn’t cutting it. It was like trying to navigate a modern freeway in a horse-drawn carriage.

That experience opened my eyes to the power of Full-Stack Observability. The old MoM model? It couldn’t keep up with the real-time insights or proactive management we needed in a world where cloud-native environments reign supreme. So we made the leap. We began shifting to Full-Stack Observability, bringing clarity to every layer of the technology stack, from infrastructure to applications, with the help of DevOps automation and Infrastructure as Code (IaC). The difference was night and day — decisions became faster, operations more resilient, and we could finally tackle issues before they became crises.

So why are many still holding onto MoM? The truth is, it’s time to let go. The future doesn’t belong to those who cling to the past; it belongs to those who are ready to embrace the new. Full-Stack Observability isn’t just a trend — it’s the key to thriving in today’s digital landscape.

Quick History Lesson

The Manager of Managers (MoM) concept dates back to a time before the Internet, before Web technologies, even before virtualization was a thing. Back then, organizations were moving from mainframe systems to mini-computers and x86-based architectures, creating a patchwork of management tools. The need for integration was clear, so MoM was born — a way to roll up data from these fragmented systems into a single, unified view.

But here’s the thing: early MoM implementations were plagued with problems. There were no standardized APIs or communication protocols, making API integration and interoperability a nightmare. Systems were siloed, each focused on a narrow slice of the technology stack with no common standards to guide operations. Can you imagine the inefficiencies? It was nearly impossible to get a true, holistic view of the IT landscape.

The Rise of Hybrid Infrastructure Management

As companies began adopting hybrid cloud strategies, it became clear that we needed a new way to manage both cloud and on-premises infrastructure. Enter hybrid infrastructure management — a game-changer that brought with it a new set of standards and frameworks designed to ensure interoperability, security, and consistency across platforms.

• OpenAPI Specification: This standard for defining RESTful APIs has become the backbone of consistent API interactions across diverse environments.
• TOSCA (Topology and Orchestration Specification for Cloud Applications): It’s all about managing applications in both cloud and on-premises environments, making sure everything works together seamlessly.
• CAMP (Cloud Application Management for Platforms): This ensures applications can move across different platforms, including private clouds like VMware, without missing a beat.
• ISO/IEC 27001 & ISO/IEC 27017: These security standards guide how we manage infrastructure, keeping it secure and compliant, no matter where it’s running.
• ISO/IEC 17789:2014 (Cloud Computing Reference Architecture): Think of this as the blueprint for managing infrastructure in the cloud, making sure everything is designed to work together.
• ITIL (Information Technology Infrastructure Library): ITIL practices have been integrated into tools managing hybrid environments, helping keep service management smooth and efficient.
• NIST Cloud Computing Standards: These standards make sure hybrid cloud resources are managed securely and consistently.
• CIS Benchmarks: Providing the security guidelines we need to keep both cloud and on-premises systems locked down and compliant.
• IEEE 2302–2021: Establishes a framework for cloud interoperability, a must-have for managing hybrid infrastructures.
• OAuth 2.0 and OpenID Connect: These standards ensure secure access to resources across hybrid clouds, keeping everything safe and sound.
• DMTF Standards: Critical for managing on-premises infrastructure, particularly in virtualized environments, ensuring consistent management across diverse platforms.
• OVF (Open Virtualization Format): A standard that makes sure virtual appliances are deployed consistently, no matter the environment.
• VMware vRealize Automation & vSphere Standards: These platforms adhere to industry standards, supporting consistent management across private and hybrid clouds.
• Hybrid Cloud Management Standards: These are the guidelines set by organizations like NIST and DMTF to ensure that resources are managed consistently across hybrid cloud environments.

With these frameworks, hybrid infrastructure management has become the bedrock of modern IT, enabling organizations to achieve greater interoperability, security, and operational efficiency.

The Shift to Full-Stack Observability

Fast forward to the past few years, and the landscape has changed dramatically. Today, cloud computing standards like RESTful APIs and the widespread adoption of Infrastructure as Code (IaC) have completely transformed how we manage and monitor infrastructure. Cloud-native architecture has brought about a new era of Full-Stack Observability, where every layer of the technology stack — from infrastructure to applications — is monitored in real-time. Doesn’t that sound like the future we’ve all been waiting for?

This shift has only been accelerated by the rise of hybrid cloud management strategies. Managing resources across cloud and on-premises infrastructure has become a breeze with tools like Terraform and VMware. These tools, grounded in modern cloud computing standards, enable advanced DevOps automation, ensuring that infrastructure changes are deployed quickly and securely.

And let’s not forget cloud security. It’s more critical than ever. With the adoption of ISO/IEC 27001 and CIS Benchmarks, organizations are now better equipped to enforce security controls and maintain compliance across their hybrid cloud environments. It’s not just about being efficient — it’s about being secure.

The Future of IT Management

So here we are, standing at the crossroads of legacy and innovation. The demise of the traditional Manager of Managers (MoM) isn’t just inevitable — it’s necessary. The future belongs to those who embrace Full-Stack Observability and cloud-native solutions, providing unparalleled visibility and control over both cloud and on-premises infrastructure. By leveraging Infrastructure as Code (IaC), DevOps automation, and cutting-edge cloud computing standards, we can not only survive but thrive in this era of digital transformation.

But this is just the beginning. MoM’s fall from grace is merely the first chapter in our journey of Rethinking Digital. What other entrenched concepts are holding us back? Which sacred cows need to be reevaluated? And more importantly — what comes next?

I invite you to join the conversation.

What concepts do you believe are ripe for rethinking?

Share your thoughts, experiences, and suggestions in the comments below.

Stay tuned for our next article, where we’ll dive deeper into how Full-Stack Observability is not just a trend, but a key enabler for digital transformation. Together, let’s challenge the status quo and explore the limitless possibilities of what’s to come. Because in this ever-evolving world, standing still is not an option.

References

• OpenAPI Specification: https://spec.openapis.org/oas/v3.1.0
• TOSCA (Topology and Orchestration Specification for Cloud Applications): https://docs.oasis-open.org/tosca/TOSCA-Simple-Profile-YAML/v1.3/os/TOSCA-Simple-Profile-YAML-v1.3-os.html
• CAMP (Cloud Application Management for Platforms): https://docs.oasis-open.org/camp/camp-spec/v1.1/camp-spec-v1.1.html
• ISO/IEC 27001 Information Security Management: https://www.iso.org/isoiec-27001-information-security.html
• ISO/IEC 27017 Security Controls for Cloud: https://www.iso.org/standard/43757.html
• ISO/IEC 17789:2014 (Cloud Computing Reference Architecture): https://www.iso.org/standard/60545.html
• ITIL (Information Technology Infrastructure Library): https://www.axelos.com/best-practice-solutions/itil
• NIST Cloud Computing Standards (SP 500–292): https://nvlpubs.nist.gov/nistpubs/Legacy/SP/nistspecialpublication500-292.pdf
• CIS Benchmarks: https://www.cisecurity.org/cis-benchmarks/
• IEEE 2302–2021 (Intercloud Interoperability and Federation Framework): https://standards.ieee.org/standard/2302-2021.html

MoM is Dead, Long Live Observability: A New Era of Digital Operation was originally published in RethinkingDigital on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

You have arrived at Re:Thinking Digital, where we dare to question everything you thought you knew about digital transformation. This isn’t just another series about embracing new technologies — it’s a deep dive into the seismic shifts that are dismantling traditional methodologies and pushing the boundaries of innovation. We’re not here to follow the trends; we’re here to lead the conversation, to provoke thought, and to challenge the status quo.

As the lines between the old and the new blur, we find ourselves at a crossroads: Do we cling to the comfort of established practices, or do we boldly redefine the future? This transformative wave is not merely changing how we manage resources or integrate systems — it’s upending the very foundations of how we think, work, and innovate across every facet of our organizations.

In Re:Thinking Digital, I’ll be sharing the hard-won insights and lessons learned from navigating this complex and often chaotic landscape. We’ll take a critical look at the constructs that desperately need rethinking — from infrastructure operations and customer experience to business processes and organizational culture.

Welcome to Re:Thinking Digital was originally published in RethinkingDigital on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

The art of human connection and friendship, as we understand it in our early years, often presents itself as a binary concept — we either have friends, or we don’t. However, this oversimplified perception does little justice to the complex, dynamic nature of relationships and the subtle exchange that happens within our social environments. As social creatures, we humans thrive within interconnected networks — our tribes.

Yet, not all of us are naturally adept at navigating these networks. Particularly for those raised within the confines of a nuclear family where the primary focus remains familial ties, the skills necessary to form and navigate social relationships beyond the immediate family can be sorely lacking. As a result, we often end up replicating the dynamics we experienced during our upbringing — the good, the bad, the ugly — into every relationship we cultivate in our later lives.

Friendship, as we discover with growing independence, is not as straightforward as we thought. The complexities of nurturing friendships, maintaining them, growing alongside our friends, acknowledging and accepting their flaws, resolving disagreements — these can be overwhelming, especially without any prior guidance. With increasing independence in adulthood, the paradox of balancing our self-reliance and the dependency that social bonds entail often emerges.

This struggle tends to intensify for those of us who pride ourselves on our self-sufficiency. While self-reliance is commendable, it has its limitations. The self-imposed boundaries and comfort zones that come with self-reliance can restrict our potential to what we can achieve individually. We may succeed within these limitations, yet we risk missing out on the shared triumphs that come with being part of a collective.

Our penchant for self-reliance may garner admiration, but it can also lead us down a lonely path. We limit our aspirations to what we can attain alone, severing ourselves from the shared triumphs that come with being part of a team.

For instance, when we find ourselves feeling burdened when a classmate or group of classmates invites us to hang out after class. Or when a close associate at school or work questions our reticence, pointing out the imbalance in our relationship — we know everything about them, but we reveal nothing about ourselves. And then there’s the confusion that comes when we’re seeing someone, not quite dating, but hesitant to define or label the relationship. All the while, we inadvertently broadcast a cautionary sign to those around us, “Tread carefully. Don’t get too close. I might just pick up and leave.”

Such scenarios become painfully clear in retrospect, as they did for me. At 19, living in India away from my family in Kuwait, balancing college and two jobs, while also grappling with the tumultuous waters of romantic relationships, I was struck by the harsh reality of my inability to form and nurture connections. Despite being in the midst of a myriad of social interactions, I wasn’t truly making friends.

The wake-up call came in the form of a brutal breakup, a public nightmare that exposed my predicament to every corner of my social circles. My breakup was a public nightmare. Everyone in my immediate and distant social circle knew about it. As a student, my college mates and their friends were aware of my predicament. As a teacher, my students, their parents, and their friends knew. Being a non-Indian living in a predominantly Indian neighborhood, even my neighbors were privy to my personal turmoil. People from all these different circles of my life rushed in to help me. They tried to console me, to advise me, to cheer me up, and even offered to introduce me to potential romantic interests.

However, despite their well-intentioned efforts, their attempts fell flat. I realized that I didn’t know how to accept their love, care, attention, or even basic human empathy. I was painfully aware of a significant gap in my emotional, cognitive, and developmental capabilities — the ability to form and nurture non-familial relationships.

Ironically, despite my social ineptitude, I was a good listener — an excellent one, in fact. My curious, inquisitive nature often led people to mistake my fascination for personal interest, even friendship. I found their ability to form bonds, get hurt, yet still continue to make friends both intriguing and admirable. Their social interactions felt as natural and as effortless as breathing or chewing food. It was enviable. Yet, no matter how much I listened, no matter how much I observed, I couldn’t quite grasp the spontaneous nature of their friendships.

Now, at 53, and happily married for 22 years, this understanding still feels new at times. Even though I have come a long way from the 19-year-old who struggled to form connections, reaching out and seeking connections with friends remains a challenge. It’s not because I don’t want to but because I sometimes forget to. The journey of learning and unlearning how to make friends continues, but I am hopeful because life is, after all, a continuous process of learning.

I think I want to talk about this more, but I feel this is a good spot to stop at and take a deep breath.

To be continued…

What factors to consider when thinking of building a Software Product/Service targeting the Healthcare Industry?

The healthcare industry is a very large, complex, and multi-participant ecosystem. In order to create a product or a service to target it, one must first figure out:

(1) Who is the target customer? is it consumers, Medical Providers, Insurance Companies, Healthcare Marketplaces

(2) Which set of capabilities and services is the Product/Service positioned to enable?

(3) Subsequently depending on the chosen target segment and capabilities, one must decide the orientation or “jobs-to-be-done” through the Product/Service.

(4) Each of the aforementioned segments has a different/varying set of concerns/challenges for a Product/Service to solve. eg.:

____ (a) Providers will be more interested in Data/Information Security, Privacy and Compliance, flexibility as a platform in terms of customization (especially with M&A reshaping the ecosystem);

____(b) whereas if the target segment is consumers then ease of use and access is paramount.

(5) Would the Product/Service be implemented as an added service/product to a larger portfolio or a stand-alone (tip-of-the sphere)?

What about building/scaling an ERP Product/Service for healthcare?

Well, if we are talking about an existing ERP platform then you must examine:

(1) The ERP Technical architecture fitness-for-change (monolith, Modules/Svcs, web, mobile, clouds etc); this will decide the “level of effort” needed to change things regardless of where you want to take it in terms of scale/evolution.

(2) The level of “Capabilities/Features Cohesion” in terms of fitness-for-purpose and/or diversity of use-cases; the more tailored, use-case specific the ERP is the harder it will be to scale unless you rationalize it to simplify unnecessary product features.

(3) The Product roadmap in terms of time and rollout; is it going to be big-bang? is it going to be segmented (targeted subgroups before expansion)? Is there a plan of parallel runs of old and new? What is the target support model ? will it be managed service (outsourced) or internally managed.

What if I am talking about EHR for managed care?

In addition to the considerations I listed in the previous points, I would add:

(1) Level/type of current integration points/systems/extensions. In many EHRs there is a slue of customizations/integrations that need to be “rationalized” before you can think scaling. This is key since EHRs tend to play in a very non-standard ecosystem with 100s of variations and 3rd party systems.

(2) A very specific obstacle in the case of EHR to think about is how to avoid “features leakage”, where as the product expands in use, more features get requested and added. This organic morphing takes the EHR system away from its main purpose; EHRs always land up doing more than its intended use and that increases its fragility and reduces its agility.

So, to summarize and action some of the points above:

(1) “Know thy Customer” and the “target outcomes”: This gives the product/service you are launching vision, direction, and ultimately (if you do it right) a sustainable value differentiator. Tools such as Empathy Mapping, Business Value Canvas, and WIIFM analysis can be very useful here.

(2) Approach the Tech landscape (new or pre-existing) and target architecture with an iterative, emergent, cloud-first, and Software-Delivery-Ecosystems mindset but don't forget reality laws of gravity. This is a very tricky space especially with the current “Digital Revolution” taking Tech and business by storm, many platform providers oversimplify and overdetermine the direction of the architecture.

(3) Don’t let “the tail wag the dog”: Creating a Software Product/Service self-guard itself to stay “fit-for-purpose”. The purpose of Tech is to enable business capabilities, not the other way round. Don’t let your enthusiasm for Tech innovation take your eyes off the ball; it is the customer that matters. Methodologies and mindsets such as “Human-Centered-Design” and “Lean Startup” are a good starting point but more evolving approaches like “Circular Design” and “Platform Thinking” are something to consider.

I woke up this morning with a strong and nagging question: What is my higher self trying to teach me about Love? What assignment or homework did I send myself to this life time with?

So, I found myself reaching to Gibran’s words trying to infer the lesson:

“Love one another, but make not a bond of love. Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.”

The question is: how do I actually do that? Isn’t that against “love hard” and “fierce passion”?

Well, Khalil Gibran continues to push me beyond my comfort:

“Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone.”

I find myself wondering: if that’s the lesson I need to learn, is that even possible without holding back? Can I be true to my heart while at the same time “do it with balance and grace”?

Of course Gibran’s words refuse to stop, but rather push deeper:

“And stand together, yet not too near together.

For the pillars of the temple stand apart.

And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.”

As I think I am getting to grasp the frail edges of what Gibran is urging us to examine, I find another cry from far flung poem by Gibran sending me in spiral:

“When love beckons to you, follow him, Though his ways are hard and steep.

And when his wings enfold you yield to him, Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.

And when he speaks to you believe in him, Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.

For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you.

Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.”

Now I am confused even more, this is where my troubles started; recognizing a long lost love from a past life and jumping in feet first. Well, let me make the matters worse, and listen to what the rest of the words have to say:

“If in your fear you would seek only love’s peace and love’s pleasure, Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love’s threshing-floor,

Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter and weep, but not all of your tears.”

So, I am basically screwed. I have no say on where the course leads me:

“And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.”

As I let those words sink in, I recall the painfully true words of Tennyson:

“Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”.

So, let me finish what Gibran insists on completing:

“To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.

To know the pain of too much tenderness.

To be wounded by your own understanding of love;

And to bleed willingly and joyfully.

To wake at dawn with a winged hear and give thanks for another day of loving.”

Damn it; Love is a process, not an outcome.

“Our past never ends”, it is always here, lurking in the background waiting to reappear.

I remember the first time I came to realize that and articulate it… it was terrifying yet reassuring at the same time.

We are our past, stretched beyond certain moments… all the way to Eternity.

I can go on and on (and probably will), but the past 48 hrs I experienced yet another profound realization (at least felt profound to me)…

I found myself remembering my father, the root of all my past.

All of a sudden, a flooding wave of memories, thoughts and feelings.

I could see it, smell it, hear it, touch it…

Don’t worry I am not hallucinating or suffering from a sudden manic attack (as you know the therapist in the clinical social worker keeps me honest and keenly aware)…

It was just that sort of remembrance, the one that you never forget.

Of course soon enough, I started “rationalizing” that as a side effect to an overdose of the subliminal messages flooding us from ”Father’s Day” advertisement. However, such attempt to brush it off failed and found myself typing on Facebook the following posting:

Happy Father’s Day to my Dad.

Tomorrow is father’s day here in the US, so I wanted to wish our father, Happy Father’s.

He was a father who did everything in his power to provide us with many opportunities that he did not get as child.

He was living example to what the word “human” means, with all its positives and negatives. He was gentle and rough, happy and angry, hard-to-get-along-with and easy to know, encouraging and discouraging. We learned a lot from him and through him. We took a lot from him. He left us with a great inheritance of memories, lessons, and relationships, something many never get from their father despite all the money and land they leave them behind (of course, I also would not have minded some cash inheritance).

Personally, I learned a lot from him. However, one of the most memorable lessons I will never forget, is his strong attachment to life with all it brings us; hardships or happiness, moments of hope or despair… He was alive to his very last breath. I hope I can master that lesson well enough, and truly embrace its meaning for this the key inheritance he left us.

I also wanted to wish each of you as a father, Happy Father’s Day.

Translation in Arabic:

بكره عندنا في أميركا يوم عيد الأب . حبيت ابارك لأبونا في هذا اليوم، كان ابا عمل كل ما بوسعه ليوفر لنا كثير من الفرص التي لم توفر له.

. كان مثالاً لكل ما تعنيه كلمة "إنسان" بكل محتواها من ايجابيات وسلبيات. كان حنون وقاسي، سعيد وغاضب، شديد وسهل، مشجع ومحبط. تعلمنا منه الكثير، اخذنا منه الكثير، وترك لنا ورثاً كبير من الذكريات والدروس والعلاقات…شيء يفتقده الكثير من آباءهم الذين تركوا خلفهم أراضي وورث (يعني لو كان ساب قرشين ماكنتش رفضتهم).

. تعلمت منه الكثير، ولكن أحد الدروس التي لن أنساها هي تعلقه بالحياة بكل محتواها…بشقتها وسعادتها، بلحظات املها ويأسها، كان حي لآخر رمق في حياته. أتمنى ان اتعلم هذا الدرس جيدا وأتقن معناه، فهو هذا بعض الميراث الذي تركه لنا.

عاوز كمان أتمنى لكل أب فيكم أحلي يوم واسعد الأمنيات

Today was no exception; after a lovely morning walk with Mary in the city, and a typical Facebook status saying:

Hello from New York, it’s Saturday Morning live with Mary Rafferty Haroun ❤

As I walked down Broadway feeling calm and nostalgic, my phone dinged…

a Facebook private message from a friend I lost touch with 25 years ago…

My past saying hello, reappearing from around the corner of memories.

Once again, it all felt as real and “present” as it did 25 years back.

We exchanged messages, then decided to further humanize it and talk over voice.

It was amazing, pleasant, reassuring. It was my past saying hello…

welcome back old friend, I really missed you…

The word “Potential” is probably one of the most widely used terms I have encountered. throughout my life (personally and professionally).

I remember as early as 2nd grade, my uncle (who is was also a PE teacher at my elementary school), advising me that I must “live up to my potential”. I recall feeling a bit puzzled by the very concept. It sounded like a “promise” by a well trusted friend or a prophecy by a gypsy looking into a magic ball to foretell the future. I liked it, I feared it, and I certainly took it very seriously. As I went through life I became aware of other uses of this mystical word; use cases implying “consolatory and polite deferment of judgement”; “well, he is not very good at this, but has the potential to learn and improve”.

I recall during my first physics class in school, my teacher talking about “Potential Energy” as this tremendous reservoir of energy where all physical objects automagically posses at each and every instance. At first it sounded very salient and passive, but soon enough I discovered that it is absolutely omni and powerful. I learnt that potential energy is as fundamental and crucial to our laws of nature as kinetic energy (movement); actually even more important.

On the more human side of the subject, I find “potential” something even more complex; on one hand “potential” as a “predisposition for success” is a relevant factor to consider while weighting options. Nevertheless, such prejudgment misses the bigger opportunity of “creating potential” where it is missing. It’s like choosing to grow crop in already fertile ground, instead of rehabilitating a land and cultivating it for “potential”.

Every time we Look for potential, we precludes tremendous set of “other possibilities”, we ignore the opportunity for creating a more potent future of “potentials”.

Such realization struck me as crucial and detrimental while attempting to recruit and hire talent for my new team. After initially approaching the task at hand with my “classical mechanics” hat on, I soon realized that I was like everyone else competing for the same “pool of talent”. I then decided to look beyond “potential” and consider looking for how to create potential within the existing workforce.

This morning, while on train commuting to work I was listening to a song by an unknown Tunisia artist I found myself remember my mom. I sat listening to the lyrics of the song and its harmonies in a complete trans. At the end of the song, I found myself thinking I should share this song with my mom, she would really enjoy it!!! Why now? Why this song? Why even my mom? She was never tech-enabled!!! I could have never “share” with her a song I heard.

I kept wondering how memories surround us, engulfing our every sense, yet remaining completely invisible until we stumble on a gentle reminder in the form of sound, image or smell.

I then found it even more profound to see how we “activate” such memories further by “engaging” them in a “present” way. Not as a long-gone past, but as a new moment or experience that is much alive.

Well, as I approached the last train stop, I smiled within myself, sighed with a gentle touch of sentimentality, and shared my newly found song with my mom…in my heart. I am more than certain, she will enjoy it.

I was sitting in my seat aboard the bus commuting back from New York when a sudden wave of grief overwhelmed me. My first instinct was to resist it, fight it, even rationalize it… but then I decided to just let it be, to let it play out. Tears rushed to my aid, and soon enough a gentle sob that turned into a sobering wave of sadness.

I then proceeded to think about grief and how central it has been to my Mom’s life.

Grief was an integral part of my mom’s life, just as was laughter, curiosity, and compassion. She always recalled losing her mother with the same intensity and realism as if the loss was recent and fresh, even after almost 40 years. Grief came to her aid when she needed it the most, like a friend who knows when to call you exactly when you need to talk. At times when she. was overwhelmed or stressed with the present, or when she was anxious about the future. All of a sudden, she recalled a loss she had and grief Kicks in giving her a sober reminder that what’s important is here in front of her, and it must not be wasted for it does not last forever.

Grief was one of the many gifts my mother left us to draw from and learn through, how appropriate!!

#RIP