Have you ever felt compelled to talk to a stranger online? It’s not that you don’t have friends you can trust and talk to — maybe you just feel like you need some solid proof that you can connect with someone new; that someone outside of your circle would understand you.

That’s how I felt one night, when I was lonely and untrusting — the only thing I thought would help me was a conversation with a complete stranger.

There was a lot going on in my life that time. Although I was enjoying working as a graphic designer in a startup company, I had a rocky phase emotionally due to a conflict with some college friends, and an unwanted sighting of an ex who was with someone new in an art museum. Both affected my mood for weeks. I deactivated my social media accounts for awhile. My colleagues saw me angsty for the first time.

All of these made me consider seeing a shrink, just so I have someone to process things with. I was scared of how emotionally unstable I felt. Being naturally penny-pinching when it comes to spending for myself, I tried to see if I could get free counselling online first before setting an appointment with a therapist.

That’s when I found 7 cups of tea.

Emotional help at your fingertips

7cups is like Omegle, minus the horny people. If you visit as a guest, it will connect you to an active listener whom you can talk to about your life issues. You can choose a category you want to talk about so that 7cups can match you better with a listener — may it be depression, breakups, or work stress. You can even choose a listener yourself. The chat is confidential, and both of you remain anonymous. You can guarantee that the other person on the line is listening, and that he is willing to go through whatever you are going through with you.

That, for me, is not only convenient, but moreover, disruptive. I’m sure there are a lot of people like me who at one point would want to seek help for their emotional or mental health, but don’t know where to start. With therapy or seeking professional help being costly and therefore not easily accessible in countries like mine, the Philippines, not everyone who seeks help get the help that they need. Apart from that, the stigma that comes with therapy in some countries doesn’t help, either.

7cups enables you to get the help that you need at the comfort of your own room (or anywhere, basically,) in front of your laptop or your smartphone. There is absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about — you are protected by your anonymity, without having to worry about the integrity of the person you are talking to. It’s accessible so long as you have an internet connection. Best of all, it’s free.

I remember venting out that night to AnonymousGypsy99 about the conflict I had with my friends — how it made me doubt my self-worth all over again. He listened eagerly, and asked me questions that would make me reflect on the issue further. We ended up chatting for two hours or so.

We said goodbye with me feeling refreshed and having a better grasp on the underlying issues I had.

That was in August last year. Last week, I was back in 7cups again with a different burden at hand. I talked to a different listener, EthanSerenity, and just like the first one, we talked for hours and it ended with me feeling better and having a new perspective on the issue.

Making an impact, one conversation at a time

Both conversations I mentioned made me want to be an active listener myself, and so finally, last week, I applied to be one. I had to go through a course that explained what active listening is before I could start being an active listener to members and guests seeking emotional support.

It’s therapeutic to be an active listener. Whenever I talk to someone, I always think about how I felt that night when I was the one who needed help. This person needs me, and so I try my best to be there for him: I choose my words wisely, make sure I am empathetic, and I really listen. I forget my problems for awhile, and just put my focus on the other. I am at the other’s disposal.

Conversations usually last for 30 minutes up to two hours, and it’s always fulfilling especially when they tell you that you’ve helped them and that they are feeling better. And when they tell you that, you will actually feel that you made a positive impact on someone else’s life. You’ll never know what your presence and willingness to listen saved them from.

We face a lot of problems every day. Some days we can handle it, most days, we barely do. A lot of people need emotional help but don’t know where to start, are embarrassed to seek professional help, or don’t have the means to find one. Most of the time, it only takes a conversation to provide emotional help and support to someone in need.

Forget the “don’t talk to strangers” rule for awhile and give 7cups a try. If talking to an active listener helps you in any way, then maybe you should consider being an active listener yourself.

Be kind, always. It goes a long way.