A few weeks ago, I got to have a conversation with a couple students I know that are going into high school this fall, and it got me thinking about how I felt going into, and leaving, high school myself. I don’t claim to know everything or have all the answers to the perfect high school experience (after all, I barely made it through my senior year, but that’s another story for another time.) There’s a good amount of things I would’ve changed or done differently if I’d ever have the option again. But hindsight’s 20/20, and there’s things I enjoyed, things I didn’t, and things I learned from both sides of that equation.

High school is a weird and confusing time (or at least it can be.) For me, the 4 years I was in high school were absolutely some of the most formative years of my life, and during that time I learned a lot about myself, my calling, what God wanted me to do, what really matters and what doesn’t, and a lot more. I gained a lot of clarity, a lot of hope, a strong picture of the future, and a lot of confusion and questions in the balance of all that.

I’m a practical thinker. I like lists and compartmentalizing thoughts. These are in no particular order or priority, but here’s a few things I would’ve said to freshman Brendan entering high school in 2015 (do the math on my age if the beard fooled you.) Take these for what you will.

1. Don’t take yourself too seriously. Seriously.

A great one to start off with, and something I wish I knew sooner — life isn’t that serious. It is, but it isn’t. It is in the sense that life is still life & there’s still things we gotta do, situations we gotta walk through, tests to take (metaphorically and physically), and flat out life to live. Some moments are gonna be more joyful than others, and that’s just what life is. But when we take ourselves (or the experiences we have) too seriously, we miss out on a lot. We’re just people — not machines designed to be perfect, and we shouldn’t take ourselves that seriously. It’s okay to laugh a little bit. It’s okay to find the joy in a seemingly joyless situation. It’s okay to dance in the rain. Not everything we walk through or experience is a clear-cut scenario where we have to react a certain way. Sometimes that’s true, but not all the time.

It’s okay to loosen up, laugh at things, laugh at yourself (it’ll keep you humble), and just realize that while there’s a lot going on, we’re all just trying our hardest and that’s all we can do. Take life seriously & don’t screw around, but when things don’t go to plan, embrace it. You’ll be alright.

2. Stand firm in what you know to be true.

I’m not sure if this is for the confused 14 year old entering high school or the 27 year old millennial, because I think we all need to hear it the same — know your convictions. If you’re a church kid like me, you’ve probably heard “If you stand for nothing, you’ll fall for everything” almost as many times as you heard Oceans on the radio in 2013. That statement holds a lot of truth though, and it’s fundamental to shaping how your school experience will turn out. It’ll shape the relationships you pour the most into, the things you’re a part of, the clubs you join, the way you walk every day, and the things you say yes and no to.

Let your convictions and your beliefs be the ruler for everything, and don’t waver in them. The more you bend, the more you’ll continue to bend — just like any physical thing, convictions can become weak when they’re not upheld and exercised tightly. Your future will be shaped by the things you do today, and the things you do today will be shaped by the convictions that live in your heart now.

Those convictions might not always be the popular one, and they might bring some weird feedback or criticism toward you from those who don’t understand. That’s okay. I was “Jesus kid” in high school, and people never understood. I was weird (and that totally didn’t have anything to do with my tradition of wearing a tank top on top of a tee shirt every Wednesday all of middle school. IYKYK.)

I didn’t take part in *most* things other people did (yes, I still made mistakes & did things I wouldn’t do now. We’re human. It’s okay.) I’m thankful I didn’t take part in the popular things, because they probably would’ve held me back from the life I live today. My convictions ruled me and walked me into the future God had for me (though it’s not the one I had pictured for myself at all.)

Your heart knows best. Follow it.

3. It’s okay to ask questions.

You’ll never believe this, but I don’t know everything, and neither do you (I’m sorry if this is news to you.) People aren’t ever gonna be impressed by how much you know, but they will be impressed by authenticity and admitting you don’t know everything. Admitting you don’t, in fact, have all the answers and being willing to ask for help or ask a question shows others it’s okay to do the same and it gives you permission to let your walls down and be vulnerable. It keeps you humble too. That’s important. No one ever went anywhere great by doing it all by themselves.

Don’t understand something? Great. Go ask someone who does. Lean into wisdom. Lean into the influences in your life that God placed there for a reason. You’ll get a lot more out of it than acting like you do have the answer when you don’t, or making up your own truth.

4. Seasons are very real. Rejoice in all of them.

“Seasons” are such a big metaphor you hear at least 3 times a week in the church world, along with storms, winds, mountains, a lot of nature-y words. (Not to mention Oceans again, but you get the picture here.)

Jokes (or jokes rooted in truth) aside, this was one of the most foundational truths for me, and the hardest to grasp onto. Seasons are real. Life comes and goes in different seasons, and it’s our responsibility to steward those well and get what we can from every single one.

Mountaintop moments exist. Valley moments also exist. (Here we are again with nature metaphors.) There are absolutely moments where you’ll feel like life is the greatest thing ever and you’re on top of the world. Celebrate those. There will also be moments where you feel like the devil is coming for every aspect of your life, you have no joy, and you just want all of it to end before you shatter into a million pieces. (Not that I’m declaring that over you, but it’s real. Jesus promised us we’d face storms too.)

The important part is knowing what to do with both of those moments. Those valley moments, specifically, are the most foundational and fundamental to growth. They push us, stretch us, make us uncomfortable, and teach us things. But in both the high moments and the low moments, rejoicing and carrying a thankful heart makes all the difference. It should be our reaction to every season — when it’s great, it’s easy to praise God, but when it’s tough in these streets, it’s a little harder to. That’s where it goes from “natural reaction” to “intentional decision.”

When we intentionally decide to rejoice, to praise God, and to lean into what every season has for us, we get the most out of life. We get the experiences and the wisdom God wants us to have. The wisest & smartest people in your life didn’t get wise from having all the answers or studying a ton, but because they walked through some mess and leaned into what the mess had to teach them. They chose to embrace the season rather than curse it away (or beg for it to last forever if it was a good one.)

No season lasts forever. I live in Ohio, where seasons last for about a day, maybe two if we’re lucky. Sometimes they last for about 4 hours. That might not be the case for your metaphorical season, but however long it lasts, know the next one is on the way. Sometimes that’s a scary thought, and sometimes it’s one worth celebrating. Either way, it’s not gonna last forever.

5. You’re not that guy.

I’ll burst a few people’s bubbles now — you’re more than the basketball player with the most threes per game or the track star who’s breaking records. I’m pretty sure God intentionally decided to not make me that person to begin with, considering I can’t even make a lay-up or a free throw, but it’s fine. Where I’m not gifted at all in one area, there’s plenty of anointing to carry me in another.

But in 4 years, maybe 8 if you’re going to college, you’re not gonna be that basketball player anymore. You won’t be that track star. That time of your life is gonna come to an end, and at some point, you’ll have to admit that and realize it’s the past, and there’s a future to embrace. It’s okay to lean into the things you love and the things you’re a part of, and you should. It’s how you enjoy them. But there’s a fine line between “leaning into it” and “this is who I am.” You can be a track star without becoming “Brendan the track star” (don’t worry, no one ever called me that. I have asthma. I was a band kid — do with that information what you will.)

Here’s some encouraging news: you have an identity that God placed on your life, and it carries a lot more weight than the thing you do or are a part of. When your senior night ends and your sport is over, you’ve no longer got that to cling onto, but you do have the identity God’s given you to hold onto — one that says you’re chosen, loved, called, that you have a purpose and destiny on your life far beyond the experience you’re currently living, that your best days are yet ahead, and that you’re His despite what anyone else has to say.

When we decide to make the things we’re a part of our identity, we end up real lost and confused once that thing’s over. But when we just embrace the thing and enjoy it while it’s here, we give ourselves permission to enjoy the thing while not being the thing. We weren’t designed to carry any other identity than the ones God gave us.

6. Embrace the now and worry about the next later.

This goes pretty hand-in-hand with “it’s okay to ask questions” in the sense that we don’t have all the answers. That’s fine. I don’t want all of life’s answers right now, because frankly, I wouldn’t know what to do with them and I’d probably ruin a lot more with knowledge I didn’t need for a certain season.

Wherever you’re at now, just be there. Don’t worry about tomorrow — God will take care of it and give you the answers you need when it’s time. If you’re a freshman (or about to be), you’ve got 4 years before you’re going to college. You don’t need to know where you’re going right now, despite the pressure from your family or friends to figure it out. Just take it one day at a time. Worrying so much about the future that you weren’t designed to worry about only guarantees you stress, anxiety, and probably acne, but somehow still not the answers you’re seeking in the first place.

Let God handle it — he wants to anyway. Ask him for help. If he provides some clarity, great. If he doesn’t, then it’s not time for that answer, and you don’t need to worry about it now.

We miss a lot of the moments we’re supposed to be taking in when our mind is already in the next one. I’ve learned to just be present and embrace where I’m at, and if God decides I’m going somewhere else, he’ll handle getting that information to me. I’m just gonna do what I know to do for now and enjoy doing it.

7. Growing pains are real, and they’re necessary.

In order to go further, you gotta get stretched. And the stretching is never comfortable or desirable. But it’s what takes us further, and it’s necessary if we wanna do great things beyond where we currently are.

Those growing pains often come through stormy seasons like we talked about above, but they’ve got so much to offer. Less-than-desirable experiences often provide quite desirable hindsight and answers you didn’t have before. Just know that every time you’re getting stretched, you’re becoming a better version of yourself. That perspective will take you far.

8. Being genuine will always take you farther than a facade.

Another one that will serve the new freshman just as well as it will serve the millennial (heck, even the boomer.) We all need reminded of this frequently.

No one wants the fake you, and no one wants to guess what version of you they’re getting on any certain day. It’s exhausting for those playing the guessing game, and it’s even more exhausting for you. It’s hard for God to bless you when you aren’t even sure who you are.

Just be real. Everything else will work itself out — when you’re genuine and just lean into who God’s called you to be, rather than what you feel pressured to be or what you think you’re supposed to be, everything else falls into place. You’ll find the right passions and hobbies, and the right friends will surround you. Life’s a whole lot easier when you have friends who like you for who you actually are and are in your circle, rather than friends who like a certain version of you or only accept you a certain way.

9. Know your circle.

Speaking of friends… know who you’re hanging around. “Show me your 5 friends and I’ll show you your future” — another classic church saying, yet an absolutely foundational truth. There are people you should spend time around, and people you should not. There are people who should have a say in your life and know what’s going on, and people who should have a view from the window across the street.

Your closest friends will determine who you become, how you act, the things you do, etcetera. You’re the middle ground of your closest friend group — almost as if a combination of all of them. That’s just human nature — we become what we’re surrounded by.

That reality makes me want to be surrounded by the right people. Friends who lift me up, encourage me, point me to Jesus daily, and who have my best interest in mind. Friends who will cry with me in times of adversity, and celebrate with me in the big moments rather than envying me for them. Friends who have my back in every corner & who hold me accountable, calling me out in love and grace when I fall short so that I can become better than I was yesterday. If your friends are only around when your life is great but turn on do not disturb the second things get rocky, those aren’t your friends.

I’m thankful I’ve gotten to call the same people my closest friends for 10 years, and I think that shaped a lot of who I became, because I constantly had the voice of God in my ear through the vessels of my closest friends. If you’re only hanging around people who are dishonoring, dishonest, and don’t carry the qualities you desire to carry yourself, no matter how hard you try to resist becoming them, you will become some form of them.

Be intentional about who you give your time to & what relationships you invest into. It makes a lot of difference.

P.S. — You need friends. Life sucks when you do it alone. If you’re the “I don’t need anyone” person, stop being that person. You’ll be a lot happier than you think you’ll be.

10. Thoughts become habits, and habits become your reality.

Ever wondered “how did I end up here?” If you haven’t yet, you probably will. Your thoughts probably got you there.

It seems trivial & too simple, but we underestimate the power of the things we think. What I think will determine how I act or respond to something, or the things I do, and that will shape the reality I’m living in. If I don’t like where I’m at, it probably started in my head.

Check your thoughts at the door. Allow the ones that line up with what you believe and who you are to stay, and kick the rest out. If they’re not honoring or don’t cause you to believe the best in people, in yourself, or about life, they gotta go. When we check our thought patterns, we naturally begin to think the things we want to think, and we ultimately shape the reality we want to live in.

11. Stop and breathe for a minute.

Rest is okay, and I’m begging you, please take some. Long nights of homework and studying are normal, and that’s fine. That only gets worse in college (sorry to break that one to you now.) But don’t run yourself into the ground.

I’m a natural hustler — I love running and running and getting things done. I love checking boxes off and feeling productive. But that’s also my downfall. I do and do and do so much until I feel like I’ve got nothing left in the tank. When rest becomes a regular routine, we avoid those moments. Allow yourself time to sit and do nothing or just hang with friends and not think about much. Those are the times we recharge ourselves the most.

A girl I dated in high school used to take a couple “mental health days” a year where she stayed home from school & just took a day for herself — sometimes it was catching up on homework, sometimes it was going on a walk, sometimes it was sleeping most of the day. All of those things are forms of rest, and they keep us going and give us more energy than we give them credit for. It’s okay to take those days every now and then. When you feel yourself getting tired, go take a nap or take a day for yourself. It’ll prevent the feeling of being on the edge all day every day or being one missed-cup-of-coffee away from an existential disaster.

12. You’ll mess up. Give yourself grace.

You’re gonna take an L or two in the next few years. I take a few (and that might be generous) every week. It’s okay. You’re human.

Use those moments to become better, to learn what you can do better, and grow, but don’t beat yourself up too hard. Take it seriously, but not too seriously. You’ll make a mistake, but those mistakes aren’t who you are and they don’t define you. Own it, make a change if one’s needed, and carry on. Don’t dwell in it. When you live in it, you make a pit of self-pity that you were never designed to be in.

Give yourself space to make mistakes and do things wrong, and let yourself do them better next time. Just don’t live in those mistakes. It’s not a fun place to be.

13. We’re not all going the same place.

This is a harder one to grasp onto… but you probably don’t have the same calling and mission on your life as some of the people around you. Right now, you’re in the same school with hundreds of other people, but when you walk across the stage in 4 years, it’s likely you won’t see most of them ever again. Truthfully, there’s one family that I was close with in school that I still talk to and hang out with. Other than that, I’m just with the people I go to church with. That’s okay.

Not everyone can come with you into the next season of your life or into the place that God’s calling you. Some people are meant to be around for a season, but only get a distanced view into the next, rather than being in the same car. This is a tough pill to swallow sometimes, because sometimes it involves letting go of friendships that are seemingly fine on the surface, but ultimately compromise your calling, your integrity, or just flat-out pull you from the purpose God has for you.

The deeper we go into this weird adventure called life and the calls God has for each of our lives, the deeper the sacrifice it requires, and it doesn’t always feel good. There’s plenty of people I could’ve remained close friends with, and I seemingly would’ve been just fine, but I probably wouldn’t have gotten to experience God’s faithfulness to the extent I have today. Sometimes, you just gotta leave something behind.

If it holds you back, let it go. You’ll be thankful you did.

14. At the end of the day, it’s all gonna be okay.

To conclude what became a much wordier essay than I intended, take this with you — it’s all gonna be fine. God’s still God, He’s still faithful, and He works every thing out for your good. He has a plan for you, He loves you, and He’s in your corner. Sometime we just need to hear that again.

Whatever happens in the next few years, know it’s all gonna be alright, whether it seems that way in the moment or not. God will carry you through. Lean into life, laugh a little, and keep your eyes fixed on what’s most important. You’ll do just fine.

You were quite the year — a joyous and confusing one, at that. I started this year saying I “wanted another 2019” after show that was 2020. I looked at 2019 as this joyous standard for a year, as that was one of the most formative, incredible, and enjoyable years I’d ever had.

A few months in, I changed that perspective — I wanted 2021, not 2019. I realized I was longing for the past, for an old move of God, and I was robbing myself of what was to be found in the current moment. I finally allowed myself to have closure on 2019, close the book of what I thought I wanted, and look forward. Boy, am I glad I did.

This wasn’t 2019. This wasn’t 2020 (thank you Lord.) It was, however, still year 2 of a global pandemic and still a confusing time to be alive. But what I found to be true this year in the midst of that is that God is incredibly faithful and when He wants to do something, He does it.

I learned this year, though, that what I walk in doesn’t have to be predicated by what’s around me. My joy isn’t circumstantial and the way I choose to see each moment isn’t based on my surroundings — if it were, I wouldn’t be very happy, and I don’t think any of us would be. This year taught me that joy is found in the Lord, and peace is found in the quiet places with Him. It taught me intentionality is everything when it comes to living the life He called me to live — less news, more time in His presence. Less leaning into the world, more leaning into the Word.

I entered this year hoping to return to “normal”, and I’m leaving it thankful we never did. Had we gone back to whatever normal was, I wouldn’t have learned to find joy where I’m at — to always enjoy the present moment regardless of what it looks like.

I learned this year more than anything how faithful God is. Everything I felt I’d lost or missed out on last year was returned and restored tenfold this year. Opportunities came left and right and time and time again everything, small and big, reminded me of His faithfulness. I learned to see God in everything this year — a realization that will humble, floor, and excite you all simultaneously. A revelation that changes the pep that’s in your step and makes fit see life a little differently.

2021 was weird. It didn’t totally suck, so it’s for that going for it against last year. There were a lot of really high moments, and also some lows (not just personally, but as a society.) But in the midst of it all, I saw God’s faithfulness and I saw God in everything. And that’s a beautiful way to live life.

I was listening to the song “Million Little Miracles” today, and it floored me a little more than it normally does — an entire song written around the fact that every little thing in this life is a little miracle worth thanking God for. That line “1, 2, 3, 4, I can’t even count em all” just hits different — if I’ve ever found a place to stop counting God’s faithfulness, I’ve not looked far enough.

This was a whirlwind of a nearly MLA citable essay in length. I’m not even sure it all made sense. But I’ll try to recap it here:

2021, you were pretty okay. Thanks for teaching me some of the important things: what I’ll miss out on when I long for a move of God from the past, what goodness and joy I can experience in the midst of everything I might see, where joy and contentment truly come from, and the incredible reality that God is truly in everything, in every moment, and He’s faithful to the very end.

Walking into 2022 with uninterruptible peace & never ending gratitude for who He is and what He’s done. I expect this will be the greatest year yet.

Peace out, 2021. Maybe take the Rona with you on your way out the door. ❤️

March 11, 2020.

The last Wednesday night we had the United before the world shut down.

Of course, none of us knew that in the moment.

This month recognizes a year since Coronavirus shut down our world. (I originally wrote this month celebrates a year, but, I think we can all agree that this is far from a celebratory moment, unless we’re celebrating the fact that we’re all still here and somewhat sane.) The last year’s taught all of us collectively a whole lot, and myself personally, I went through a ton. I learned a ton. 2020 was one of those collective experiences that widens your perspective and opens your eyes. It sucked. It was simultaneously amazing. I hated it. Yet I’m thankful for all of it.

2020 taught me as a whole that I do have emotions. I found that hard to believe before, but I sure did begin to feel everything, and I felt it hard. I recall writing an Instagram post shortly before we finally got to have the United again titled “week 18 without the united” where I poured out some very raw and real emotions, mostly pain and sadness. Last year taught me those things were okay to feel.’

I figured that in recognizing we’ve somehow made it a whole year since life as we knew it completely stopped existing, I’d take a moment to share some of the things I’ve learned and realized throughout the last 365 days. Some of it goes without saying. Maybe all of it goes without saying for you. For me, it took an experience like last year to realize some of these things.

The 7 days following March 11 were wild to say the least, and little did I know that was what the next 6 months were going to look like, give or take. I’d never even heard the word “Coronavirus” before that Wednesday — somehow it existed everywhere but my own world, and soon it’d be the thing changing my entire world in just a day. I remember starting to see people a little hesitant to be themselves that night. Friends of mine were refusing to high-five me, dap me up, hug me… you get the point. I was confused. (And a little offended, but that’s probably less important in hindsight. I got over it.) I had no idea what they were talking about. Hearing it was “unsafe” to give the homies a high five was one of the weirdest things I’d heard. (Do my high fives really hurt that hard?) I didn’t understand. Lesson one, a short and easy one that needs not much explanation: We don’t always understand everything. There’s gonna be a lot of times that we straight up just don’t get it, whatever “it” is in our lives. That’s okay. Life would be boring if it were certain. Ask questions, roll with the flow, and the things you don’t understand, roll with them anyways. I could’ve spent all my time trying to figure everything out and get all the answers, or I could’ve just rolled with the punches and dealt with wherever I ended up. I did a mix of the two, but more of the latter would’ve been better.

Like most people, I had a fairly set schedule for my life – I knew what my weeks were going to look like for the most part, I knew what I was involved in, what most of my days looked like, and I had a steady rhythm. Wednesdays were for the United. Fridays were for Anchored. Sundays were for church. That’s what my life revolved around. All the other days, I worked and took photos. That was my flow.

Turns out, I took that for granted (and I think most of us did.) I was married to that flow and was insanely comfortable with it, and when that got uprooted, my foundation was severely shaken. And just when I thought I had it figured out, it changed again. The beginning of the pandemic kept me on my toes frequently because nothing ever stayed the same. I had to learn to roll with it and just keep going, though, and that’s okay. Turns out, we’re not meant to be married to our schedules and plans. Being stuck to one idea holds us back and prevents us from experiencing the moment. Lesson two: Your schedule doesn’t matter. Harsh words, but true. My idea of a schedule was thrown straight out the window by life last March, and I haven’t seen it since. I probably won’t ever again. I’m cool with that now. This whole life of following Jesus isn’t meant to be too comfortable anyways, and that goes for most aspects of it, schedule included. When I’m too focused on my schedule, I’m going to miss things. There was a lot to take out of everything that happened last year, and if I just focused on my schedule and trying to get it back, I was going to miss it all. Schedules are great, but they aren’t king.

I think one of the weirdest experiences was the fact that I went from seeing all of the people in my life 2 or 3 times a week at church to not seeing them at all for a little bit, and then seeing them over my MacBook screen. That might’ve been one of the suckiest parts – I thrive off of community and I’m energized by being around people. I’m always the last one out of church at any given worship experience because I’m staying late talking to everyone I know. I’m a social butterfly. Not everyone’s like that, but at the root, everyone desires and is designed for community. Lesson three: We need community and we need to be surrounded by people. That doesn’t mean being swarmed by people at all moments of the day, but it does mean having consistent and quality friends in our corner who can care for us, love us, speak into our lives, celebrate with us, and walk through the tough times with us. The start of quarantine quickly became a lonely place for many, and that’s when I think a lot of people, myself included, realized how desperately and deeply we’re designed for connection with others. We weren’t ever meant to do this life alone. Ecclesiastes 4:9–10 says this: “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.” This isn’t just Bible talk – it’s a genuine principal laid out for us in scripture. We need each other. When we try to do life alone, we find ourselves in lonely places that haunt us or in dark places in our minds that distract us, disable us, and draw us away from the calling God’s placed on our lives. Godly community is designed so that we’re surrounded by people who hold us up, walk us through the tough times, celebrate the good ones, and bring us back to the King in the moments that we need it. Community’s meant to encourage us and lift us up. Without the great friends I have in my life, I’m not sure how well I would’ve made it through that season. Not everyone’s like me and wants to see people all day everyday, but at the end of the day, we all long for some sense of connection and community — we all want to feel loved, known, wanted, and appreciated.

The time we spent in quarantine, working from home, and doing church online taught me a lot of things too – and that’s something I’m super grateful for. Lesson four: There’s lessons in everything. This is NOT saying God creates bad circumstances just to teach us a lesson or get things to us. Let’s clarify that now. Good things are from God. Bad things are not. What this IS saying, however, is that there’s something to take out of every experience, and we have to be looking for it or we’ll miss it. Some things will stick out more than others. Some will be more blunt than others. At the end of the day, there’s always an opportunity for learning and growth from everything. I got the opportunity to try a lot of new things and do new things at work that weren’t things I’d normally do, and getting to do those things for a few months expanded my talents and skills immensely, and they’ve made me a better leader and employee now. They also helped me understand my calling a little deeper and walk in it. Most of that season sucked, sure. Most of it wasn’t desirable. But even the most undesirable moments had great lessons and great experiences to carry out of them that taught me crucial lessons, helped me grow deeper in my faith and in my leadership, and gave me some experience and wisdom that I absolutely needed to get through that season and now regularly employ in my life thanks to that season. All that said — look for the good in everything. There’s always good in everything. There’s always a takeaway. There’s a lot of reasons that I’m thankful for that season, because I undoubtedly wouldn’t be where I’m at now without it. It’s all about perspective.

Fun fact: I didn’t sleep much over quarantine. Lesson five, a short & simple one: We need rest. God designed us for rest. That’s why the sabbath exists. There’s a day that’s simply designed for not working and not going crazy… just resting. Wild, isn’t it? If the One who created all things needed a day to rest after all that work, it’s likely that I do too. For a while, I just kept running and running myself because I felt like I had so much to do and didn’t want to let anyone down. However, I reached this unhealthy state where I spent all day everyday working and didn’t take care of myself, and when I get to that point, if I don’t rest, my body will make sure that I do. And go figure, I reached a point where I absolutely crashed and couldn’t do much but sleep for a day or two. Embrace rest. It’s a healthy, God-designed thing. It’s not lazy or lacking. Know the difference between laziness and Godly rest, and embrace the rest. It’s what charges you, motivates you, and keeps you running at a healthy pace for the rest of your journey. When you’re running at an unhealthy and unsustainable pace, you run yourself down quickly and cause more harm to yourself and the journey in front of you than you would if you’d just take a moment to recharge in the presence of God and in the rest that He created. Know your boundaries and know when to stop. You’ll thank yourself later.

And for the last one: Stay connected to the vine. What do I mean by that? Stay connected to Jesus. He’s the vine, we are the branches (John 15:5). We grow through Him. We get strength, motivation, encouragement, joy, peace, rest, and all other good things through Him. He carries us through and holds us up in all seasons, both the good and the bad. I can genuinely say that going through such a cruddy time taught me a lot of the importance of spending daily time with God and making sure my devotion and prayer life was as strong as it could be. To be the best person, leader, friend, boyfriend, employee, etc. I can be, I need to be in tune with the heart of Jesus and be walking this life the way He wants me to, and the only way to do that is to stay connected to Him daily and start my days in His presence. As quarantine went on, I quickly found that the days I didn’t start with Him, I was quickly drained, unmotivated, irritated, etc. The days that I started with Him, I found peace and rest throughout my day and the strength I needed to keep going on the tougher days. The truth is we need Jesus in every moment, every hour, every day. I don’t want to do this life without Him. I’ll never get to be who He wants me to be and who He’s called me to be if I never spend time with Him, and I’ll never find the things I’m looking for in this life if I never look to the One who made the things I’m looking for. May I consistently remember and act upon the importance of being Spirit-led and spending as much time with Him as I can. It’s the only way I’ll make it, and it’s sure the only way I made it through 2020. By the grace of God.

This was a lot to take in, and I’m sure I could think of more to write about if I wanted to, but this was enough word vomit for one piece. If you made it this far, congrats. You probably like hearing me speak or reading my words more than I do.

2020 was a doozy. It was a whirlwind. Most of the time, I felt like that blurry meme of confused Spongebob. All that said, I’m thankful for it, because it’s those moments and seasons that truly refine someone and give them a chance to catch the things and tweak the things that need caught and tweaked. The moments that force us to press pause and make some adjustments or make us learn some things are arguably the most beneficial moments we’ll get the privilege of experiencing, and I pray I’ll never waste those moments away. What we do with those moments are so vital, and I’m thankful I found the things I needed to do and was able to take some lessons away from such an interesting experience.

Thanks for reading all this. I hope you got something out of it or that it spoke to you in some way. Until next time. ✌️

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Tonight, I came home to no power at my house. Not an irregular thing where I live.. but normally our outages are short. They’re normally more of a slight interruption rather than a complete disconnect. I had this big plan laid out earlier today to get a bunch of work done when I came home and hustle, but I was quickly humbled by my inability to do so because of this outage. Tonight reminded me of something that I don’t practice enough — pace & the ability to pause and rest momentarily when needed.

I’m a natural born hustler. I love to just run until I can’t anymore and do whatever I can. That’s always been my personality. I think it’s a great trait to have, but it’s also a dangerous one. My favorite analogy is looking at the human body as if it were a phone. Phones have batteries that provide power to them to accomplish the very tasks that they’ve been created to do. When the power supply from that battery reaches its end, the phone can no longer do its job until its power supply has been replenished. I think we’re the same way. We’re the phone, and the power supply is our spirit & our health. Those things have to be continually cared for and watched after in order for them to be kept in good shape. When we’re consistently running all day long every day trying to do stuff and check off lists, we’re taking resources from those supplies that we have within us.

As a kid, I was always told to put something back when I’m done with it. My dad told me when he drove his parents’ cars, it didn’t matter how much gas was in the tank when he took it — it was to be returned with a full tank of gas. When you use resources, they have to be replenished in order to keep being used over and over again. The best way to recharge your spirit & keep yourself in good shape is to simply do nothing for a day — to rest and allow yourself to be recharged. That doesn’t mean sleeping all day; it simply means chilling out and taking it easy. Self-care is so important for taking care of yourself, taking care of others, and doing the things that God has called you to do. If you just keep running without stopping for rest, you’ll be forced to rest one way or another. I know this from experience.

Take it easy on yourself. Work hard. Don’t work hard enough that you fall apart and wear yourself down. When anything in general is maintained well, it lasts longer. Maintain yourself well. Being tired is a completely natural feeling — let yourself feel it. Put down the computer and get some rest. Charge yourself up. Come back stronger. Pace your flow well so that it can be a healthy rhythm of hustling and resting, rather than exhaustion and hardship.

It’s finals week, the most stressful week of the semester. This is probably going to be the most sleepless week for me as I finish out my first semester as a college student. As I’m thinking about all the sleep I’m likely not getting this week, I’m thinking about the idea of rest in general and how vital it is for our everyday lives.

I’m a busy guy. At 18, I’m a full-time college student as a senior in high school (post-secondary), I work, volunteer at my church, freelance as a photographer/videographer, and I drive deliveries for DoorDash on the side of that for more income. I’m doing a lot and I don’t sleep a lot. I’m not complaining one bit about it though – I love this life. I happily chose a life of continuously hustling and chasing dreams, because it’s what I love. I love being busy and doing things. I love accomplishing things and exploring (that’s my favorite part about being a photographer.) I feel unproductive anytime I’m not on my feet doing something. I’m a natural-born hustler and I love that. It works for me because I also like owning things and shopping, and I have to make that happen myself. I’ll go weeks on end consistently working between school, photography, and my actual jobs, and sleeping only a couple hours each night.

The hustle’s not a bad thing. I fully believe in working for what you want and relentlessly chasing the vision that God’s placed in your heart, which is what I’m doing every day. However – we need rest. We need time to recharge. We need to give ourselves time to charge up and fill up before we get back on the grind. If my phone battery dies, my phone is rendered useless until it’s plugged back into the charger. The phone itself is capable of a lot until it’s source of energy is empty. My phone can make calls, check Twitter, post photos on Instagram, and text videos of happy dogs to my girlfriend. However, if the battery’s dead, that’s not happening. There’s nothing left in the phone for it to perform what it’s supposed to do.

Our lives work the same way. We can only do so much before we come crashing to a halt in need of rest and a recharge. Taking a day or two to relax and not worry about things isn’t irresponsible or lazy – in fact, it’s quite the opposite. It’s the healthy thing to do and it’s what we’re called to do. It’s my personal nature to continue to run until I can’t anymore, but it only hurts me, because then I get sick and am forced to rest when I feel like I can be doing more. I’d rather willingly rest than be forced to rest because I originally refused to.

“Six days you shall work, but on the seventh day you shall rest. In plowing time and in harvest you shall rest. // Exodus 34:21 (ESV)

Give yourself a break. Work hard, but not to the point where you can’t anymore. Recognize when you’re getting weak & take charge of that by giving yourself a break and allowing yourself to recharge. We all need it. Resting allows you to charge up and go back into life stronger than you were before. It’s not a bad thing and it’s not lazy. It’s good. Don’t work yourself too hard.

Disclaimer: This is an old writing. I never shared it until now — I wrote this in mid-June.

I’m making it a goal to write more this summer and reflect more on the great things that God does for me. Not only for me, but for those around me — something to celebrate for one is something to celebrate for all. I don’t entirely praise God enough for everything that he’s done and that’s something I need to be much better at… which is what a good portion of what these summer nights journals are going to be dedicated to. It’s no secret that winter always seems to be a dark and trying time for me.. things just seem to not go my way and I admittedly become pretty pessimistic. This past winter I totaled my car and didn’t get a new one until spring… which proves the point that winter just isn’t my time. I want to be able to look back at these summer journals when winter comes and remind myself how faithful God is when it becomes difficult to believe. If anything, these are for myself. I need reminders that God is God and His word always remains true.

God did something great tonight at the U. I witnessed chains break within those around me. One of the coolest things is watching a move of God, even if it doesn’t affect me directly. It’s just as amazing and inspiring watching those around me be touched in miraculous ways that only He can do. I felt a huge culture shift in the room tonight as Natalia led the entire room into singing “You’re so good to me, to think where I would be, if not with you.”

How powerful. That one sentence holds so much truth and power in it. God has been so good to me and my life is so much better because He is in it. I remember what life was like without knowing God at one point in time, and it wasn’t a pretty life. I don’t want to revisit the life that I lived without God. Life as I know it now isn’t always the prettiest or most encouraging thing — especially those winter seasons I talked about. Sometimes life straight up sucks, to be honest. But one thing remains the same — He doesn’t change. He is always faithful and he always follows through on His promises. He is so good to me. I want to never forget that. I sit here now and think about all the times he’s come through.. and it’s overwhelming. It was an overwhelming presence in the room at The U as all of us collectively declared that fact over us. God got me a job when I needed it. He got me a car when I totaled mine. He brought finances to pay for that car and the insurance. This month when I started to freak out about my bills, he came through with two photography checks and more on the way. He always seems to come through at just the right times and always proves himself faithful. Like the song said… He is so good to me. I couldn’t ever imagine living a life without him again.

None of this is really even where worship went tonight… but that’s fine. Worship speaks different things to different people. God doesn’t speak the same things to every person because not every person needs the same thing spoken to them. As I sit here by this peaceful lake, I’m reflecting on tonight and the things that God spoke to me, and I just continue to think about his goodness and how he’s always, without fail, come through for me when I’ve needed it the most. God is good & God is faithful. Tonight was a simple & peaceful reminder of that for me — ”Hey, everything will work out. Everything will be okay. I’ve never failed you before. Trust me.”

I’m glad I’m writing this down and reminding myself of it now — I’ll need it again this winter. I’m aware of my weaknesses and I’m using my times of strength (like now) to prepare myself for tough and troubling times. I don’t ever want myself to forget how faithful He has been.

This past Sunday, we started daylight savings time. I’m still salty that I lost an hour of sleep, but I took a BOMB nap Sunday afternoon so I guess that makes up for it. (It’s 1:30am and I can’t sleep now so maybe the nap was too good.)

On my way home from my friend’s house tonight, I started to think. It was 7pm, and it was still bright outside. I didn’t entirely process it yet — I was so used to it being dark by 6 or so, and even earlier than that earlier in the year. Winter is commonly known as a time of darkness, depression, attacks, storms, etc. It’s never been known as a ‘prospering time’ for many. When I woke up in the morning, it was bright outside. On my way home, it was bright outside. These are both fairly new occurrences after winter. They’re major signs that spring is coming and the warmer weather is on the way. How exciting for those with dry skin who loathe winter as much as I do.

I’m not writing this just because I’m excited for the warmer weather, though that’s a huge part of it. I think it relates so well to our physical beings and spiritual lives as well. We all experience stormy winters in our lives. I’ve been going through one myself, one that I’m now starting to find my way out of just as mother nature does at the same time. (Double win.) Where the darkness and cold are, sadness and depression seem to settle in. Where the light is, there’s hope and healing. When I looked outside and saw it was still bright, it lifted my mood and brought some hope to me. It began to motivate me & inspire me to get a little more done. It made me think of all the upcoming opportunities I have coming my way this summer for photography and video. More time, better weather, more daylight to get things done. More horizons to explore. The possibilities are endless and my mind hasn’t stopped racing since that ride home. I feel great right now. In my eyes, the storm is gone. The winter has passed. The new light is here, the hope on the horizon has arrived. Looking out my window, I saw a world of new possibilities and dreams & I became inspired. I had this rush of happiness & excitment. The storm that I allowed myself to live in passed by & great new things were on the way for me. God works all things for the favor of those who love him, and today I realized that as I looked out the car window into the sunlight. The light overrides the darkness.

The motivation here: your storm won’t last forever. Sooner or later, it will pass by and you’ll see a whole new light of possibilities; a new light of hope and inspiration. Today I recognized that light. Greater things are coming than you could ever dream of. Hold onto your hope and faith, and keep persevering. The storm shall pass. There will be a whole new light you’ve never seen before.

With God’s power working in us, he can do much, much more than anything we can ask or think of. // Ephesians 3:20 ERV

He made the storm be still, and the waves of the sea were hushed. // Psalm 107:29

We both were okay (God is good, folks.) We were a little bruised up.. but we were okay. However, I lost my car. Three airbags had deployed and the car was totaled. As a church, we declared 2018 to be our year of unfair favor. In that moment, I wasn’t feeling it. Day one of the year, and I was carless. (To the freshmen I used to drive home from school that I’ve been blowing off for two months, now you know why. I’m sorry.) Not a great way to start my year. How was God favoring me when I had just totaled my 3 month old car?

I didn’t realize it at the time, but there was a load of favor right there in that moment. God protected me. The situation could’ve been much worse. My car could’ve landed upside down. I could’ve been thrown out of it. Emily could’ve been hurt. There was favor in the fact that we only left with a couple bruises and some sore muscles. Beyond that, I realized God works all things for our good. He doesn’t create the horrible situations we endure sometimes, but he works them out for our own good when we are faithful to trust in him and his plan. When I realized I lost my car, I freaked out for a moment and worried — but then I realized it’s not my place to worry. It’s not my concern, it’s God’s. I drove a pretty nice car. I got it for super cheap. I was blessed, and naturally I was pretty out of it when I lost that car.

Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. // Isaiah 43:19 ESV

Life felt like a desert when I lost that car. I felt pretty alone — my life had been shaken up. I’d grown so dependent on my self and independent in life, and very quickly had to learn to become dependent on others and their schedules for rides. No more driving around or hanging with friends til 3am. When dad wanted to be home, I wanted to be home. I had to get used to it quick. Wrecking my car brought a boatload of inconveniences and setbacks that I wasn’t prepared for. However; what I’ve learned is this:

Minor setbacks lead to major comebacks. Right now, I’m in a period of pruning and preparation, and preparation time is NEVER wasted time. When life turns to crap, God uses it for your advantage. He uses the time you’re down to prepare you and boost you into something greater. There’s a major blessing ahead for those who stay in the story and stay faithful to his calling and his purpose during the times where life isn’t so easy or convenient. Before my accident, life was great. I had a car, I had gas, I had freedom, and plenty of money in my pockets. That changed in 5 seconds. I lost my car, my freedom, and most of my money because I have to pay off a car I no longer own AND buy a new one.

But this remains: God is still faithful. He’s making a way in the wilderness; rivers in the desert. In what seems like a desert of a life right now with spring approaching and myself still being carless, a river is coming. God will provide a car & the funds and the favor to get it when the time is right. A blessing bigger than I could expect is on the way. A better car than I had before and the money to get it. Whatever it takes, God is preparing me for it right now so I can prosper later, even if it requires some unenjoyable work and obedience on my end. God is always God and He is always faithful. I stopped worrying about my car & stopped worrying getting a new one. I’m letting God take care of it because I know He remains faithful and He will make a way in the wasteland.

I want to encourage anyone reading this with this:
Don’t stop believing in an Isaiah 43:19 God. He will always remain God and he will always remain faithful. I’m fully aware that the favor is on me even when I can’t physically see it or feel it, and all things are working for my good. He is preparing me for future prospering & making a way for me. I’m absolutely thankful to serve the God I serve.