Honestly, I spent way too much time trying to figure out what to write. I toyed around with a ton of ideas. I considered naming this The Verge of Adulthood and giving tips on how to adult but then I remembered that I still act like a child. I tried to find a movie, quote, or song that I could make relevant. Nothing worked. Eventually, I decided to just wing it. Apologies in advance for whatever I come up with.

I love birthdays. Any excuse to eat cake and tell embarrassing stories about my friends makes me happy. I’m the annoying person who calls you at midnight, posts birthday wishes on every social media platform, and makes collages full of hideous pictures. If you’re dumb enough to let me plan your party, you’ll be treated to an extravaganza. More often than not, I’m more excited than the birthday girl/boy. Needless to say, I go all out for my own birthday. It’s the one day a year that I willingly socialize. Birthday tiaras are a must. I pick elaborate themes and overdecorate. Mummy asks how complicated my wedding is going to be if I put this much thought into birthdays.

As I’ve gotten older, my birthdays have definitely gotten simpler. Gone are the days of intense party planning and inviting everyone I know. I went to boarding school, so I haven’t been home for my birthday in a few years. Going to uni in Scotland means that I’m far away from both my family and my closest friends. I’ve gotten used to facetime calls and belated celebrations. Now, I spend most of my energy planning my little sister’s parties instead of my own. That’s not to say that I stopped enjoying my birthday. My friends, no matter where they are, still make me feel loved, celebrated, and thoroughly embarrassed. My parents send tulips and cupcakes every year. I still force people to come to events that they probably don’t want to attend. Whether I have a blowout or a super lowkey day, I still love celebrating.

My 21st birthday is on Sunday, which is strange considering that I feel (and act) like a 12-year-old. Since the beginning of the month, people have been asking me what I want. I still haven’t come up with an answer. With only two days to go, I’ve officially given up on thinking of gifts. Instead, I’ve come up with a list of 21 things I hope my 21st year is full of.

1. Serena Williams’ excellence
2. Love
3. Shondaland shows
4. Mental, emotional, and financial stability
5. Ice cream
6. Milo’s cuddles
7. Good grades
8. Family gatherings
9. Laughter
10. Spa days
11. McDonald’s runs with the flat
12. Warm, fuzzy blankets
13. Soup Club
14. Books (and the time to read them)
15. Netflix bingeing
16. Late night conversations with my best friends
17. Random dance parties
18. Grandma’s stories
19. The desire to go to the gym
20. Growth
21. Joy