If you have grown more than 10 different types of plants, you will understand every plant has its own personality. To make friends with people, you need to meet their needs and preferences. To make friends with plants, you need to provide the most appropriate environment for the plants to thrive.

I used to go to the nursery to buy plants just because they look pretty. But I soon realize that they don’t always stay pretty at my home. Two months after they arrived at my home, some drop leaves, some become droopy, some lose their beautiful color, some don’t even stay alive. Sometimes I succeeded in saving them by making some adjustments, while other times I had to sadly say goodbye.

I come to learn that there are five main environmental factors that affect plants’ growth. Light, temperature, water, humidity, and nutrition. And before picking up a plant, I should always check if I can provide it with specific needs.

Some factors like light, temperature, and humidity are generally already determined by where I live. I live in a north-facing apartment, therefore I was never able to grow flowers that need full sun for 6+ hours. California is mostly dry throughout the year, so I need to use a humidifier for my Ctananci who loves humidity.

Other factors like watering and nutrition can be met by taking some effort to get to know your plants. Watering a complex procedure that I am still learning. The frequency of watering plants not only depends on the preference of the plant but also changes with the season of the year, the size of the pot, the type of soil, etc. Which fertilizer to use or when to use fertilizer is another world of knowledge that I am still learning.

After a couple of failed relationships with plants, I start to know better about the plants as well as myself. I start to know some plants that I can hang out naturally with, while some plants that I’d better keep some distance from. It is always happy to see plants suddenly or gradually improves with my care and love. While at the same time I peacefully accept the fact that some plants can only grow so much in my care. It’s neither the plant’s fault nor my fault, it’s just we are not the best match. So I need to learn to let go and give the plants to my friend, hoping they can thrive in a new environment!

One of my proudest plants is a fiddle leaf fig. Not like most fiddle leaf fig you see on Instagram, it is a tree with multiple branches. But it did not always look like this. When I first bought it, it was just one single branch with less than 5 or 6 leaves. An accident totally changed its growth path.

Two years ago, the fiddle leaf fig tree was the most famous indoor plant on social media. I was so excited to finally get my hand on it and it cost me a fortune. I cared for it like a baby and it grows fast. Within half a year, it grows from the size of a table plant to a small floor plant. It was my favorite tree at the time until summertime.

In August, I read somewhere that rainwater is more beneficial for plants than pipe water. So I moved my fig tree from the living room to the balcony to enjoy some rain and sun. Unfortunately, it rained non-stop for about two weeks. I didn’t realize there is root rot until several top leaves had turned brown. When I rescued it to the living room, it was too late. Brown spots continue to spread out in the large beautiful leaves. The tree survived, but it looks ugly.

I was so upset that I couldn’t even look at my tree. So I did something dramatic, cutting the top half of the tree where most brown leaves are, and move the plant to a corner of the living room. The tree didn’t grow any new leaves for several months. Every time I look at the tree, I feel regretful and shameful. Even it survived, it is a ruined tree that will no longer be perfect as it was before.

During that time, I also went through the darkest time of my life. I looked at the ugly tree and I saw myself. A depressed tree that will never be as beautiful as before. But I was so wrong. Plants are so strong that when they are pruned, they develop more branches and become stronger trees.

Some day around October, I noticed four new tiny buds appeared around the cut. Slowly, tiny buds start to unroll into tiny leaves. Slowly, tiny leaves grow into bigger leaves. After about half a year, my fiddle leaf fig became a tree, a bushy beautiful tree.

Today, I can still see some trace of the brown spots on the older leaves, but I no longer feel ashamed. Instead, the accident might be the best thing that has happened to the tree. If it is not because of the accident, I would never cut the tree and promotes more branches and it would probably continue to grow slim and tall, but it will never grow to be a bushy tree like it is now. There might be another bad accident in the future, but I believe that they will be able to survive and recover from it.

I used to be a person who kills any plants. In the last two years, I gradually become a plant person. I learned a lot of tricks about growing plants and the number of plants in my house slowly increased from 1 to 30+. There are a million ways that you can save or kill a plant. But if you ask me what’s the most important thing of growing plants? I will say patience.

I remembered that had a cactus when I was around 15. It was big golden barrel cactus and I loved it. One day I found the cactus turned a little soft and yellow, I believed it was because it is dry, so I watered it. But it didn’t get better, so I got more concerned and watered it everyday. Of course it never recovered. I killed the plant fast by over-watering it.

I was probably ignorant about cactus at that time. But now that I know way better, I still kill plant by over watering them, over fertilizing them, over pruning them, switching pot too soon, moving seedlings outdoor too soon, etc. I read many skills and tricks about plants, but the knowledge didn’t stop me from making more mistakes. I feel that the more I do, the faster I kill or hurt my plants.

But when I stopped over-caring my plants and let them do their own thing, my plants started to get along with me better. I found that plants are doing fine when I accidentally skipped watering. The leaves grow even faster when they are a bit root bound. When I forget about some plants in the balcony, they started to flower. Plants taught me to be patient.

But patience is not a simple. Especially when you are struggling with recovering from a sickness, when you are suffering in a bad relationship, when you feel stuck with study and career, when you feel you are just not moving forward with your life. It just seems that you tried everything but still nothing improves. It seems impossible to keep the hope and faith that one day it will get better. But plants showed me that even they suffered from yellow leaves, break branches, even root rotting, they can slowly recover and grow new stems and leaves.

I am thankful to my plants. They are on my balcony everyday to remind me to be patient. Just give it a little more time.

Ingredients:

• 1 pound ground pork (or beef)
• half onion
• 1 egg
• 80ml beef stock
• 40g breadcrumb
• 1 tsp salt
• pinch of pepper
• 2 tbsp cream
• 1 tsp sugar
• 1 tbsp butter
• parsely
• nutmeg

Air fryer for 20 minutes at 400 F.

Recipe:

• 1 pound pork rib
• 2 cloves of garlic
• 1 cup soy source
• 1 cup rice wine
• 1 cup Oyster sauce
• ginger and onion

Ingredients:

• Pork rib 1 pound
• 1 1/2 tbsp soy sauce
• 3 tbsp black rice vinegar
• 2 tbsp shaoxing wine
• 30g white sugar
• 1 tbsp toasted white sesame
• ginger and green onion

Tips

• I followed Youtube video by Amanda Tastes https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yauKESA6daM. Very successful!

Ingredients:

• 1 pound boneless, skinless chicken breasts, cut into 1-inch cubes
• 1/4 cup flour
• 1/4 teaspoon salt, or to taste
• 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
• 1 large egg
• 2/3 cup bread crumbs
• 1/3 cup grated Parmesan cheese
• 2 teaspoons dried parsley flakes
• Olive oil spray

This recipe works for a 6 inch round baking pan. Bake at 350F for 25 to 30 minutes.

Ingredients:

• ½ cup butter
• 1 cup white sugar
• 2 eggs
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• ⅓ cup unsweetened cocoa powder
• ½ cup all-purpose flour
• ¼ teaspoon salt
• ¼ teaspoon baking powder

Tips:

• Use a hand whisk, instead of an electric mixer to avoid over mixing.
• Mix the dry ingredients (flour, cocoa powder, salt, baking powder) in advance makes it easier to mix them into the wet ingredients.
• Grease the pan makes it easier to move the cake out of the pan.
• Don’t over bake it, otherwise, it will be a cake brownie rather than a fudge brownie.

This is a recipe for 9-inch pie pan. Bake at 425˚F for 30–35 minutes.

Ingredients:

• 2 pie crust
• 4 cups cooked chicken shredded*
• 6 Tbsp unsalted butter
• 1 medium yellow onion (1 cup chopped)
• 2 medium carrots (1 cup) thinly sliced
• 8 oz white or brown mushrooms (stems discarded), sliced
• 3 garlic cloves minced
• 1/3 cup all-purpose flour
• 2 cups chicken stock
• 1/2 cup heavy cream
• 2 tsp salt plus kosher salt to garnish
• 1/4 tsp black pepper plus more to garnish
• 1 cup frozen peas do not thaw
• 1/4 cup parsley finely chopped, plus more to garnish
• 1 egg beaten for egg wash

Tips:

• I followed Youtube video by Natashas Kitchen https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1XELWKaCi4.
• I used a store-bought pie crust. The crust is just as flaky!
• Shredded chicken can be replaced with turkey or ham.
• The amount of chicken stock can be adjusted depends on the vegetables you put in.
• The cream can be replaced with milk.
• Brushing the egg wash on the top pie crust is crucial for getting the beautiful golden color.
• Slice the top pie crust.
• Let pie sit for half an hour after moving it out of the oven.