Now, for those of you who are not aware of what I’m talking about, I don’t mean Sally’s Beauty Supply. No shade to Sally’s because they have great products too. One of my favorite clarifying shampoos is sold at Sally’s Beauty Supply actually. For the sake of this post, the beauty supply stores which I’m referring to are the ones that I grew up with in my neighborhood. For me, it was a great day when I could go into the local beauty supply store. It becomes a pinnacle experience for many brown-skinned beauties throughout life.

Out front, there was almost always someone selling something out of the trunk of their car. If items weren’t being sold from the trunk of their car, they were being sold by a vendor on the sidewalk. I would note, if you are going to purchase from these sellers, do so with caution. I bought a pair of glasses from one of them once when I was 15, and they broke two days later. I was crushed. I digress. Walking into a beauty supply store whether as a little girl, teenager, or young woman, feels like you’re walking into endless possibilities. It feels like you’re seeing so many products that you never knew you needed. I have to put myself on a limit when I go into the beauty supply store. I’m all about hair care and trying new things. If I don’t tell myself before going inside that I’m only buying a few things, the situation can get out of hand pretty quick. There are so many brushes, combs and packs of hair clips, that cost only a few dollars, if that.

I remember the first time my mom and I bought braid hair from the beauty supply store. There were so many different options. There were aisles full of various packs of braid hair. I had no idea what braid hair was, but it took me a while to leave that section of the store. It was like I was immersed in it and I wanted to touch and sample all the different types of hair. Huge packs of hair were only $4 and I couldn’t wrap my mind around how that whole process worked. One of the ladies at the store helped to match me to the best color. I watched, wide eyed, as she gathered up my packs of hair. Let me tell you, once I got those braids, you couldn’t tell me anything. I felt like a new world was unlocked.

I realized at an early age that there’s also an unspoken rule to the beauty supply store. The rule is that no matter how someone looks when they walk in, don’t judge them. It’s all apart of the process. Many times, women headed to the beauty supply store with no makeup, in sweats and sometimes pajamas. I’ve seem women mid-hairstyle that needed an extra pack of hair because they ran out. Hair bonnets are a common occurrence. It feels like a special day when the occasional full head of flexi-rods makes a quick appearance. Regardless of how women appear when they enter the store, they leave with what they need to look like a million bucks. Hence, the reason why we don’t judge. We all know, it’s a process.

The beauty supply store houses everything you could ever need for whatever look you’re trying to pull off at great prices. Pretty much every brush, comb, hair clip and bobby pin that I own has been, and will continue to be purchased from the beauty supply store. If you’ve just watched one of your favorite YouTube personalities complete an amazing hair look, run down to your nearest beauty supply store. Trust me, you’ll find everything you need there to make it happen for yourself. You’ll get a boost of courage to complete your look with every tool at your fingertips.

I can’t begin to describe how incredible it felt as a college student to be able to go with my girlfriends to the beauty supply store and share in the task of finding a good edge control. Having grown up in a predominately Caucasian school system, these were not common occurrences for me. Most of my friends growing up wouldn’t have really been familiar with what edge control was. To be honest, I wasn’t even really familiar with it at that age. Attending Howard University for my undergraduate experience definitely came with some learning lessons, but it came with a whole lot of great social moments that I didn’t realize I missed out on previously. Ironically, the beauty supply store was still apart of that treasured experience.

Shopping at the beauty supply store is a very familiar experience for many African-American men and women. Fond memories, cute new looks and fun times have been shared in beauty supply stores. From shelves of knockers and barrettes for kids, to wigs and natural hair care products for women, there’s something for everyone at the beauty supply store. I continue to see the beauty supply store as a commonplace for many women. Even now at 23 years old, I still get excited every time I walk into one.

As I watched while some of my favorite YouTube personalities gave me some great ideas, I began to see a trend. Just about everyone in the beauty community on YouTube is talking about the new Tarte Cosmetics Shape Tape Foundation. After watching the videos, I understand why. Personally, I’ve heard many of great things about their Shape Tape Concealer, although I’ve never tried it. After reading and watching the reactions of others, along with doing some research on my own, I found something interesting buried beneath the surface. If you’re not sure what I’m talking about and why this foundation launch has been worth talking about, allow me to set the scene…

Tarte Cosmetics is a multi-million dollar makeup and beauty brand that recently launched their highly anticipated Shape Tape Foundation. Most of their customers who have used their Shape Tape Concealer were among the most excited to give it a try. Next to NARS Radiant Creamy Concealer, one of the popularly used concealers is Tarte Cosmetic’s Shape Tape Concealer. Out of the 14 foundation shades available, less than three cater to any woman or man with skin darker than my own. To put it in perspective, I am on the lighter side in complexion, especially during winter. Most of my foundations or concealers are tan, caramel, golden or somewhere in that range depending on the time of year. To put it even more into perspective here’s the list of their foundation shades: Fair, Fair Neutral, Fair Beige, Light, Light Neutral, Light Sand, Light-Medium, Medium, Tan, Tan Sand, Deep, Rich, Mahogany. Out of 14 shades, over half of the names don’t appeal to any woman or man with darker skin tones. To drive home how limited the range of shade options are with Tarte’s new foundation release, Rihanna’s long awaited makeup line, Fenty Beauty, featured 30 different foundation shades at its launch in September.

While the example above is specific to makeup, the underlying topic of this article is not. Tarte is a rather reputable and highly established makeup brand. Women and men of many shades have been purchasing their products for quite some time now, which leads me to wonder how it was permissible to release a foundation line this limited in a time when it’s all about diversity. Even as I type this, I find it it hard saying “a time when it’s all about diversity,” because that’s how it should have been from the start. But nevertheless, that’s another blog post in and of itself. Tarte is definitely taking a hit. I would imagine their PR team hasn’t really gotten much sleep over these past few days unfortunately.

In 2018, making mindless mistakes like these on such a public platform that influences and impacts so many people, cannot happen. Claiming ignorance is no longer an excuse for lack of inclusion. African Americans and other people of color have had a hard time, historically dealing with perceived social norms that we don’t fit. We have sacrificed many of humiliating and uncomfortable experiences in order to shed light on concepts that come innately for us. Thankfully, in many of incredible ways, we have made some great progress with multi-million and billion dollar brands that haven’t always included us. It’s always a wonderful sight to see when brands and companies recognize us as frequently as our white counterparts. But, for example, when we see college students and other adults somehow thinking it’s even remotely permissible to wear black face to a Halloween party, it kind of feels like we are taking steps backwards. Or, when someone asks to touch my hair when I wear it naturally, it makes me feel like we’re heading backwards. It makes me feel like I am a fascinating object in a store that a toddler is heading straight for. How is it that it becomes okay to ask a stranger to put your hands in their hair simply because you find it interesting? It’s weird, uncomfortable, and obviously not normal anyway you slice it.

When a makeup brand of this magnitude decides to release their foundation shades which almost entirely cater to those with light or white skin, it feels like one of those “are you serious,” moments. It’s like a slap in the face to those individuals who are excluded, and to those who are included but aren’t with exclusion. It was so incredible to see YouTubers of all different races come together to let viewers know that this lack of inclusion would not be acceptable. It was also heart warming to see those viewers comment and share how they agreed. Tarte has since apologized for the lack of shade range and they have noted that they are coming out with more shades. Regardless of the steps they are currently taking to rectify the situation, for a launch, most brands would want to put their best foot forward. Tarte came out with this foundation line already taking two steps back, bringing anyone with rich skin tones back with them.

It might just be makeup, but the underlying principle is definitely worth discussing.

As have had my fair share of experiences with meal prepping over the last year, I’ve run into a couple obstacles here and there. Meal prepping can look very glamorous especially if you watch 90% of videos on YouTube. From the specially color coordinated containers to the perfectly portioned sizes; it’s very appealing to grab and deliciously cooked meal and head out the door. Before you take the dive into meal prep, please allow me to provide these quick tips.

Tip One: It takes commitment.

That meal you love that you decided to prep for a week may seem like a great idea on the first day, and maybe even the second day. Will that meal still be okay for you the remaining 3–4 days of the week? This is something to keep in mind. When meal prepping, if you intend to keep costs low, there will be a certain level of dedication you’ll want to have. By all means, try new things but don’t over complicate it either. If your eating similar meals for dinner and lunch maybe try to change things up by incorporating different snacks and breakfast. It helps.

Tip Two: Have a budget in mind.

Meal prepping can be expensive depending on what you buy. A fast food cheeseburger can cost you a little over a dollar but fresh fruit may cost twice as much. Trader Joe’s has become my best friend. It’s not as expensive as some other health food store chains, but it’s great quality and many of their products are gluten free, dairy free or organic. When meal prepping it’s all about making enough food for 3+ days including snacks. The goal is to use fresh, healthy ingredients that will work well with your workout plan. This means that naturally the cost will be higher than some less expensive meal options, but by coming up with a budget you can stay on track!

Tip three: Be safe.

Meal prepping can be really nice, but even if you are keeping your meals refrigerated you don’t want them sitting around for too long. Bacteria can form and ingesting it isn’t the best idea. Write on a calendar or label the dates that your meals were made if you don’t remember. This will help you make sure that you’re not eating spoiled food. If your food looks odd or smells unappealing after some time has passed, toss it. Try to make meals when as you know you will be eating them and try not to meal prep too much food that you know you can’t finish. This illuminates waste, over spending and the possibility of eating spoiled goods.

Hopefully these few tips can help you to kick start your meal prep journey. As always, make sure your doing research on what foods work best with your desired body/nutritional goals. If you’re planning to get summer body ready, just remember that working out represents a small portion of the process. It’s really all about what you eat and how that plays in with your workouts!

When I was asked the question, of course I didn’t want to seem like I didn’t have a great answer to provide and I didn’t want to have all three of us sitting in an uncomfortable silence while I sorted my thoughts out. The truth is that when I was asked the question, it seemed like a thousand thoughts came flooding through my head at once. While we as black women are magical and fantastic, life isn’t always the easiest for us understandably so. I didn’t have an issue with coming up with issues that we face, but giving my opinion on the biggest issue was tough. As I thought hard about it for a moment, all of my thoughts settled on one primary focus, the African-American woman’s identity. Our identity as women is a treasure that has been given value for far too long at the hands of men. This treasure that is invaluable has historically been sold at a price far less than its worth and we were given no option or say in the matter. With the advent of of social media and the incredible influence of beauty industry standards as well, staying true to who we are as women can be an uphill battle to say the least. As a black woman, being a minority twice over can at times leave one feeling lost in the fray. When you strip a person of their identity you change the course of their life. When an entire group of people are stripped of their identities, you can change the fate of generations to come. That is an incredible amount of power to hold, and it is time that we as women of all races take back the power that was rightfully ours to begin with.

As I was writing this, I was watching the incredible showcase that was the 75th Annual Golden Globes. Of course I will write a separate blog post on the poignant evening and Oprah Winfrey's spirit uplifting, heat warming, passion stirring speech. As it coincides with this post, the theme of the evening was not only about the celebration of phenomenal works in film and television, but also about the solidarity of women and men choosing to place power back into the hands of those who for so long were stripped of it. I do believe that it is important now more than ever that we as black women know who we are and take that with us every day. There are so many different beautiful shades of black, and with each woman who exudes confidence, there’s a story behind it. Every woman and every story deserves to be respected and valued.

As the question was posed to me, I would pose the same question to my readers. If we can pinpoint what we feel the biggest issues are that women face, then we can bring attention to these problems and change them. The goal is always to improve where we can and marvel in the achievements that we obtain. I implore my sisters to know who they are. Being a double minority can be a battle sometimes, but I’m up for the fight!

Step 1: Be honest with yourself.

This can be one of the most difficult steps to embrace. Reason being, having to face the reality of where we are in life including the good and the bad, isn’t always the easiest thing to do. In areas where we need to improve, it means that we have to confront the reasons why we’re in the positions we’re in. That can be difficult to say the least. It means not only do we have to tap into our humility, but we have to take ownership of our faults. Although it can be hard to do, it is necessary! The good news; however, is that the truth can set you free. It may sound rather corny, but there really is no better motivator than honesty. Go figure, honesty doesn’t just revolve around the New Year’s holiday. We can be honest, all year around, which means we can stay motivated every day!

Step 2: Be intentional.

In order to affect change in our lives, we must be intentional. This means that until a change becomes habit, we have to intentionally put in the extra work to make our goal come to pass. For me, one of the best ways to be intentional is to physically write down what I need to do each week to achieve my goals. I love a great planner! Kate Spade planners are my favorite. They are polished, classic and big and I prefer to have space to write (I have big hand writing). At the end of each day, I come home to check my planner to see what I’ve accomplished for the week. This is also helpful because it allows me to see what else I need to do. I also like to use special gel pens to write in my planner. I color coordinate entries based on priority tasks, and the gel pens provide an overall clean appearance. Now, you don’t have to use a Kate Spade planner or special gel pens to be intentional. Everyone is different, and by default, we have different ways of doing things. I encourage you to find what being intentional means for you and work it out!

Step 3: Do your research.

I’ve been in school for my entire life pretty much. I graduated from college in 2016, and this year and a half that I’ve been out of school is the longest period of time that I’ve gone without being in school (besides infancy). When I say that I understand why research is critical, believe me, I do. From writing countless essays and papers, to drafting news stories and conducting interviews; I know that doing research is crucial. If there’s a goal you’re looking to accomplish for the new year, do your research on it! It can be very helpful to read up on how others with the same goals or similar goals have accomplished their own. If you want to eat healthier, I would suggest researching fun, fresh, new recipes. If you have a hard time remaining focused, read up on how others channel out the noise and hone in on their craft. We can all learn new tips and tricks to being the best people we can be, and researching credible information is a huge help!

Step 4: Trust the process.

His story is not the same as hers and their story is not the same as mine, and that’s okay. In this day and age with the onset of social media, everyone’s success is readily accessible. While I do love a great success story, it can be very easy to start comparing ourselves to our inspiration in a dangerous way. I advise steering clear of this trap. Inspiration is meant to be that, pure and positive. We have to make sure that we trust our individual processes. This is the best way to bask in the glow of a goal freshly achieved. Success tastes the sweetest when there’s a story of hard work, patience, and dedication behind it. Don’t rush your testimony by thinking it should be the same as someone else’s. My mom always told me that what’s for me, is for me. Which means when the time is right, I’ll step into the fullness of what’s in store for me. I just have to grind, be diligent and stay focused to get there. Keep your eyes on the prize, and make sure you embrace your journey!

Step 5: Take it easy.

This step is a bit ironic, but sometimes we all have to take it easy. The grind is 95% of the battle, but every so often it is okay for us to lift our heads up and survey where we are and how far we’ve come. Celebrate your milestones along the way to each of your goals and treat yourself when you know you deserve it. There’s nothing wrong with giving ourselves incentive to go after our goals. Positive reinforcement definitely isn’t a bad thing, and it really can help on the days when we feel like giving up. Don’t be afraid to give yourself a cheat day, or time to just unwind for a bit. Savor each moment of it and use it to power through until you can reward yourself again! You might find that taking stock in the little things can teach you how to appreciate the big things exponentially.

This is self explanatory, but ever since I became an avid social media user, it was around this time every year that my news feed would be alive with motivational speeches. Quotes, sayings and phrases during this time typically allude to rebirth, revision, rejuvenation and other “re”-prefixed words. As I scroll through my news feeds on various social media accounts, occasionally I come across a new post that seems unique in comparison to the rest. I live for inspiring posts and other unique content.

As I read through all of this material on New Year’s Eve and the day after, I realized that I hadn’t posted any content that I felt inspired by. Ironically I turned to Instagram for the inspiration for this post. I share various group texts and Instagram groups with my college girlfriends. We talk to each other almost every day using either method. Just before New Year’s Eve, one of my girlfriends posed a thought provoking question to our group. She asked us if we could each name one word that we would like the new year of 2018 to embody. It was a great question to ask, but honestly I had no idea what word to choose. I spent a moment thinking about it and although some good words came to mind, one stood out more than the rest. My word for 2018 is prosperity.

I want everything I do in this year to breed prosperity. Everything I touch, every thought I have, and each moment I have to myself, I want to be drenched in prosperity. I intend to reap the positivity that I sew into my life tenfold. I desire to share that overflow with my loved ones and new people I meet throughout the year. I want fresh ideas to breed other new and improved goals, and I pray for the direction to bring those goals into fruition. It’s pretty simple now that I think about it, and who isn’t ready to be a walking success? Who doesn’t want to strive to be the best person they can be by having the best attitude even in the face of uncertainty?

Last year taught me some valuable lessons and I experienced somethings that I most definitely was not expecting. Even with the unexpected lessons learned, I have no doubt that they worked in my favor. As I’m sure anyone can imagine, I would prefer it be that way! I’m excited for the new year, new goals and refreshed motivation (there’s another re-prefix). If 2018 is your year for rebirth, rejuvenation, revision and more, then by all means work it to your advantage! I encourage and challenge those that read this to decide what your word will be for 2018. I hope you embody the very essence of that that word and I hope that you discover the true meaning of what that word is for you.

Happy New Year!

I got my first relaxer during my last year of middle school. I was 13 at the time. Prior to getting a relaxer, my mom always did my hair. It was healthy, thick, and a little ways past shoulder length. To this day, I can recall weekend wash days growing up. The smell of a hot comb meeting fresh Ultra Sheen hair grease is a distinctive smell ingrained in my memory. I still remember the ache in my neck as I bent over the kitchen sink while my mom washed and conditioned my hair for what seemed like an eternity. There were many a slight arguments had on wash days as I look back on it now. When I’d finally reached an age where I wanted more control over our wash-day routines, I talked to my mom about getting my hair relaxed. Between sports, gym glass, and becoming a teenager, wash days were becoming more frequent and tiresome.

I was fascinated and a bit anxious as I sat in my stylist’s chair. I didn’t really know what to expect. I’d gotten my hair done at a salon before of course, but this was something new. My hair was a blank canvas upon which we were creating something new. I welcomed the opportunity, along with the promise of less taxing wash days. My stylist got everything ready and I watched, wide-eyed, as he began what I can only describe as painting in my hair. I sat still as he explained how we wanted the relaxer to sit on my hair for a while to work its straightening magic. I felt nothing for a while as I looked at my hair covered in what looked like thick white conditioner. He rinsed my hair clean of the chemical after a while, before wrapping my hair and sitting me under the dryer. By the time the whole ordeal was over, my hair felt more manageable and I was excited. I kept running my fingers through it as though it wasn’t still my own hair. It seemed like an answer to my prayers!

Fast forward four years to the last week in my hometown before leaving for college, I’d just gotten a fresh relaxer. My hair was laid, fresh and ready for my new journey. I was consumed with the excitement and anxiousness of my new life’s journey. Packing, driving the 8 hour trip to Washington, D.C., and moving in was stressful enough. I was wrapped up in exploring my new surroundings and adjusting to a new reality, I forgot about that wonderful relaxer I’d grown accustomed to. Within the first month of college, my natural hair texture was coming through at the roots. I thought it wasn’t too big a deal and I didn’t really know what it meant, so I left it alone. I also hadn’t found a new stylist so I figured there wasn’t too much I could do. Classes continued on and responsibilities started piling up and within another month, my hair was now breaking off and my roots were getting significantly thicker. I had no idea what to do with my hair quite frankly and it was making me nervous.

I found myself in a pivotal place with my hair. I was nervous, unsure and inexperienced, so I did the only thing I could think of. I called my mom. She calmed me down and explained to me what was happening. I realized that I either needed to find a stylist I trusted to relax my hair (I’d seen horror stories so I was slow to choose this option), find a protective style or do the big chop. The big chop was not something I wanted to do honestly, so I opted for a protective style. I figured this would be a more comfortable way of handling my hair dilemma. I’d worn various different braid styles previously, so I opted for hair extensions, or more commonly, a weave. I was excited for the opportunity to try something new, plus I knew my hair would be safe and untouched under the tracks. I had it all figured out!

I purchased my hair, had it installed and rocked my weave. I was excited for yet another new experience, or as I like to call it, embracing the wonderful world of weave. I wore my hair in a weave all four years of college. I learned how to vary the lengths to achieve a certain look, pick great companies to buy hair from, and style my extensions. I spent a lot of time on weave research. I went from 14 inches to 24. I had fun with my extensions and I invested a lot of time, money and effort into them. I still enjoy it to this day! However, it wasn’t until I graduated and thought long and hard about my hair journey that I had a revelation.

Had I spent nearly as much time, energy and effort on my natural hair, there’s no telling how much longer and healthier it could have been.

My natural hair was pretty thick and had grown significantly since my freshman year, but for someone who claimed to spend so much time on wearing weave to protect my natural hair, I wasn’t really doing all that I could to actually protect and nourish it. Something important to keep in mind about protective styling is that simply keeping your hands and heat out of your hair is not enough. It is not enough by any stretch! While applying excessive heat to your hair can be a major catalyst to damaged strands, consistent moisturizing is very much so necessary to having healthy hair. If my main focus was truly on what was happening beneath the tracks, which was what the whole purpose was of wearing this protective style was supposed to be about, then I would have invested the same amount of time in researching great new products for my natural hair. I would have made sure to take down my installs at least twice a month to really moisturize and deep condition my hair. I would have allowed my hair time to go without an install to give my roots a break from being in tight braids all the time. I would have done things differently.

Since being home from college, I’ve made my natural hair my true priority. Now, five years without a relaxer, I can say that I am pleased with the results I’m seeing. It is a continued natural hair journey and some days are easier than others. I get excited now to test out great all natural products on my natural hair, and it feels good when I come across a new hidden treasure. It feels good to see the fruits of my labor as my hair continues to grow and stay thick.

It is always important to remember that it can be easy to lose track of what’s most important when wearing protective styles. Protective styling can be a fun and exciting to try. Never lose sight of what’s most important — the hidden gem you produce naturally.

I start out each morning similarly. During the winter months it seems harder to get up, so I have to take my time doing it. I’m a morning person because I have to be. I make myself a nice hot cup of peppermint and raspberry tea and I sip on it slowly as I peruse through my world news and social media apps. Shortly after I’m updated on what events unfolded as I slept, I take my morning shower. I get dressed, then collect my things before heading out the door. The drive to work usually takes me about 20 to 25 minutes if I drive through town instead of hitting the highway. I prefer the drive through town, sometimes I can stop at Panera for breakfast if I’m ahead of schedule.

When I took this photo this morning, I was on my way into my job. It’s about a five minute walk from the parking lot to the entrance of the building. Since our building is now shared with another large company, I park farther away from the entrance which would typically mean a longer walk. For me, because I don’t like the cold, I can still make that walk in about three minutes. I was almost to the main entrance of my building when I had the strongest inclination to turn around. To be honest, I typically only get that urge if I feel someone walking too closely behind me. I noticed that I was in fact alone and cold, so I tried to push the thought out of my mind. As I took a few more steps, the feeling came back around, coaxing me to simply just turn around. Like an older sibling indulging their little brother or sister, I decided to give in, not really sure what I’d see.

As soon as I turned around I knew exactly why I felt what I did. It was a beautiful moment of stillness. The frost was still hugging every blade of grass and the water in the nearby pond seemed like even it was frozen in time. Not a single ripple disturbed it. The Weeping Willow tree that I love so much gave off its melancholy aesthetic which was contrasted by the brightness in some of the nearby Maple and Pine trees. It smelled like crisp air and pine trees. There were no birds in the sky, no people around, no cars parking. It was just me and this view. In that moment I became aware that each of my senses was in hyperdrive as I admired the beauty around me.

I felt honored to see such effortless beauty in an uninterrupted place.

The point of this post is simply to say that it doesn’t take much to enjoy the little things. It is a common phrase that we neglect all to often. I was blessed by what I saw this morning. I encourage my readers to take the time to recognize special moments like these in even the most unexpected times.

To be honest, I was toying with the idea of what this post would be about for a few days. I like for my topics to just come to me naturally, as they usually do. That’s what I love about my blog, I can write about whatever I want. For some reason; however, the words weren’t coming through as clearly as I would have liked. I simmered and stewed, then simmered some more, but none of my ideas were gripping me enough to write about since my last post. Eventually I let that go, since that wasn’t getting me anywhere. I figured that I might be moved one way or another by reading something interesting. It’s quite interesting to read up on something new every day, which can also inspire me to write something fresh and new. I read a cute, satisfying story today published by The Washington Post about LuLu the pup. She’s a stunning black Labrador Retriever that trained for a while with the CIA’s K-9 unit. LuLu was on track to become a huge help to CIA security and other detail by sniffing out potential explosives and more. As time went on though, LuLu was less interested in that role and opted for a more laid back lifestyle. The CIA decided after much deliberation to terminate her training, and LuLu now leads an enjoyable life at home with her owner/former trainer and his children. Imagine that, a puppy who realized bomb sniffing wasn’t for them.

I then proceeded to watch eight inspirational videos posted by Goalcast.com — a website dedicated to helping each of us achieve our goals through applicable advice, motivation and other resources. I listened with an open mind as Octavia Spencer, Peter Dinklage, Ashley Graham, Denzel Washington, Muniba Mazari, Pink, Matthew McConaughey, and Mark Zuckerberg, all gave important perspective into understanding purpose and embracing it. It was shortly after grabbing a few tissues and drying my eyes (I got a bit emotional watching a few of the videos) that I knew what I wanted to write about. Ironically, I’d been thinking about this for a while, but I needed those videos I suppose to pen it down.

Knowing your purpose and embracing the journey to achieve it are two completely different things.

I’ve always wanted to road trip to New Orleans. I don’t want to fly, I want to road trip. I want to stop in tiny towns and have mini adventures on the way to my final destination. I want to take memorable pictures in interesting places that I may very well never revisit. I want to enjoy good food in New Orleans, food so good that every other bite I thank God for my existence on this planet. I love Beignets. I’ve never had one, but I just know that I love them. I could sit here all day long and talk about this trip, but embracing the 17 hour, 1,177 mile drive, is another matter entirely. Even if I were to break that time up, that’s a lot of time spent in a car. I’ve never spent that kind of time on a road trip before. If I said I wanted to experience a road trip the way I claimed to, I’d have to make peace with the drive I’d have to make to get there right?

It is my belief that no one ever said life would be easy and predictable. Almost all of us are in a constant state of figuring it out as we go. When I think about knowing my purpose, I know that’s only half the battle. Realizing that I will go through some ups and downs to get there and learning to be okay with that is the other half of that battle that can be easy to shy away from sometimes. When we don’t embrace the process to achieve greatness, we fight it. When we fight it, we make excuses and that takes precious time away from moving forward. Inevitably we wind up at a stand-still. When we aren’t moving forward, we often times become upset and discouraged. When we become upset and discouraged, it becomes easy to take time assigning blame rather than work even harder to achieve greatness. By the time we’ve done all of this, we often feel like we’re back to square one.

We must make peace with the important process that it takes to be our best selves. It doesn’t happen over night, and there is no rule book. Have a little faith, a lot of stamina, solid convictions, and a touch of mercy. We may be surprised to see how far that takes us.

You know that saying people tend to use when referring to taking life one day at a time? I’ve found that it’s usually applied in conversation during times of great pain and strife, healing or self building, reevaluation and reawakening. When the days no longer fly by in blissful carelessness as they once did and life begins to challenge the very essence of who we are, we realize that it gets tough out here. When what you thought you knew isn’t what it is, and what it actually is doesn’t resemble exactly what you hoped it would be; we begin to take it one day at a time. As I’m writing this, the lofty lyrics of Whitney Houston’s hit song, “Step by Step” are playing on repeat in my mind. She was right you know. As she blissfully croons that no one tells us how to get to where we want to be, but when we get there we’ll know — I’m realizing more and more that what she said was true.

I plan ahead for my future, I always have, but I’m finding that as time goes on I actually can enjoy taking life one step at a time. I place one narrow foot in front of the other and I see where that gets me. I take stock in the small things around me, and it forces me to be honest with myself about my strengths and my weaknesses everyday. I used to equate the idea of taking life one day at a time as a means to just barely make it through. The idea of that terrified me because I wondered if life could ever make me feel that overwhelmed emotionally, spiritually, physically and mentally, that I was reduced to taking toddler like steps. The idea of it, to me, was like relearning to walk after experiencing the joys of sprinting, jumping and skipping. It later dawned on me; however, that like a toddler taking their first steps in life, there’s nothing wrong with savoring each one in a similar fashion.

So I’m here, starting this new journey, unfolding the everlasting evolution into the journalist that I am. This was the first step, now I will see where this takes me.

Always remember, think out loud…