“Screw it, I’m going in,” John Harwood appeared to say, much to the delight of Ron Isana, who joked earlier that John was skinny enough to pull it off.

And in his very first appearance on Up, Scott Bolden went in at the last second, along with John Harwood… AGAIN!

Then we went to break and I think a plan was hatched.

Of course, when Elie Mystal is gonna #pastriot at some point, mostly because if he doesn’t,he will — self admittedly — say something he’ll regret. We got you covered, Elie… use the power of the pastry.

But wait, was that Katie Phang eating a doughtnut with… a fork?!?! Yup, and if the camera would have caught it at the moment of oral insertion, we would have called that a #pastriot moment. But the camera didn’t….

With twenty minutes left on the clock, Katie had more than enough time to recover from her attack of good table manners.

Wait, what is this? Yasmin Vossoughian encourages everyone to grab a doughnut, raises hers to the center of the table, they bump buns and each takes a bite in a group #pastriot moment! Another #Up first!

And redemption, Katie Phang.

Happy New Year, #uppers Here’s hoping your 2019 keeps you safe, content and carbed-up.

Last show of 2018 was originally published in Currant Events on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Sunday, funday was originally published in Currant Events on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Thanks to the quick eye and DVR foresight of #upper Tina W, we have photo evidence of Dr. Christina Greer sneaking a bite and scoring her second #pastriot medal.

Thanks Tina!

Eagle eyes upper was originally published in Currant Events on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Just when we think we have seen every strategy, a guest comes up with yet one more that lights up the twitter TL and makes David Gura fall in love with his cake job even more.

Without even drawing a breath to segue into what was clearly a well-planned caper, Danny Cevallos broke out the to-go bag and a pair of tongs, shamelessly blaming his pregnant wife for his thievery while stuffing two pastries into the bag.

In a later tweet, he retracted his wife’s pregnancy and said she was nursing. In a move to cover up his obvious lie — er, misstatement — he even posted evidence of the post-pregnancy condition, i.e., a baby. We have not seen evidence the pastries made it to their stated destination, but we can take a lawyer at his word, right?

Hmmmmmm…. the jury of #uppers is out on that one.

Anyway, while this was a clearly brazen and original act by Mr. Cevallos, #uppers were not convinced it met the minimum standard of “oral insertion.”

Great entertainment, though, Danny! Loved it.pas

Tongs? Pregnant wife? To go bag? was originally published in Currant Events on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

After threatening to go on for another interminable ten minutes with a diatribe about the ineptitude, sycophancy and just general ickiness of Mick Mulvaney, one brave doughnut leapt into action and plowed into Pete Dominick’s cake hole…

Wait, can we make a hole filling a hole joke? Is that allowed on cable TV? Hmmmmmm….

There were two #pastriot casualties here today; Pete and the brave little doughnut that saved us all from a time over-run.

Doughnut jumps on a grenade was originally published in Currant Events on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Glenn Kirpopped a bite of pastry in just as the camera was panning around, but #uppers caught it, awarding him his second #pastriot medal. It’s not as thrilling as the first time around, but then, what really is?

Uppers are expecting increasing entertainment value with each attempt. the pressure is on, Glenn… or shall we say, up the pressure?

Glenn goes for two was originally published in Currant Events on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

David meant that as a compliment as Russian Teacakes are supposed to be dry and crumbly. The drier, the better!

As David attempted to read the prompter without inhaling cookie crumbs down his windpipe, the panel around the table were calculating how best to leap over the Plate to give him a Heimlich maneuver, should he need one on national tv.

I’m pretty sure Lizz Winstead would have been first at the plate, because…. well, when else would you ever have a chance to do something like that on TV?

Our lesson of the day is; three things nobody should do on television:
1) wear chroma green
2) Wear stripes
3) Bite into a Russian teacake

Something they will be teaching in broadcast journalism school for decades!

It’s dry! was originally published in Currant Events on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

“To be honest I was thinking ‘I should put something in my mouth before I say something about Kelly that I’ll regret.’”

And that is how Elie became a #pastriot on a Sunday morning in December, 2018.

Elie Mystal saved by a cookie curl was originally published in Currant Events on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

From the moment he sat down, Danny Cevallos had his eye on one of the designer UP cookies. He presented the colors and ate the colors. #pastriot status secured.

UP cookies never had a chance was originally published in Currant Events on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

It finally happened; three #pastriots in one show.

Let’s hope this is good luck to all involved. It does appear, though, that the magic happens when they sit next to Cristina Beltrán.

Interesting “coincidence.” Needs more exploration…..

Three on a match! was originally published in Currant Events on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.