Now the birth of Jesus the Messiah took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. Her husband Joseph, being a righteous man and unwilling to expose her to public disgrace, planned to dismiss her quietly. But just when he had resolved to do this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit.”

Matthew 1:18–20

A bishop who once visited my childhood church introduced me to a fairly well-known analogy on giving and receiving. He explained that Sea of Galilee is full of life, vibrant, and filled with fish because it receives the Jordan River and it gives it back as the river flows through and continues on. The Jordan then flows into the Dead Sea. He explained that the Dead Sea is dead because it receives but does not give.

This analogy, like many others, focuses on how it is more blessed to give than to receive. But as a middle-aged Black woman, I now know that giving is only more blessed when you are also receiving.

How interesting it is that I cannot remember hearing one analogy that speaks to the blessedness of receiving, while giving is a constant expectation. The truth is that constant giving with no receiving stifles life and growth. Jennifer Hudson captures the impact of always giving with little to no reciprocation brilliantly in her song Burden Down:

“When I lay this burden down, who’s gonna take it up for me?

When you run me in the ground, that’s the day you’re gonna see

For all I’ve done I’m alone, just for a moment can I not be strong?

So how ‘bout now, oh can I lay, this burden down?”

The first time I heard the song, I kept it on repeat for an entire week. The heavy expectation to be strong at all times manifests unconsciously as the idea that we are not worthy of support, or as being perceived as weak if we need support. This is true for many women of color, and particularly for Black women.

We are shaped from birth to carry the burdens of those around us in every context; from family, to work, and even church. We are compared to Eurocentric femininity and often found wanting in the eyes of those who feel justified in judging us.

So we work, earn, and fight both consciously and unconsciously to achieve or hold varying levels of “acceptability” amid all the burdens that life places on us. This is what Zora Neale Hurston alluded to when she referred to Black women as the mules of the earth.

Mary carried the Savior of the World in her brown-skinned, teenaged body before marriage. Her circumstance epitomized what the world rejects as “unacceptable”. And yet, when her closest means of support was preparing to walk away, God became her defense. God is the most reliable witness to our worth and value when others are limited by their own perceptions and bias toward us.

Advent reminds us that when we say yes to God, we are free to carry what God is birthing in us without the burden of crafting our own defense. When our yes to God invites rejection, even from the most honorable among us (as Joseph was), God affirms our need for support and makes a way for us to receive it. This advent Jesus invites us to lay our burdens down.

When I lay this burden down, who’s gonna take it up for me?

God will.

Prophetic Practice

Where in your life right now is it more blessed to receive than give? Take a moment to give thanks for the areas where you are well-supported, and to pray for the areas where you need more.

Why Receiving Is Just As Important As Giving was originally published in Hush Harbor on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Luke 2:8–10

“And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, ‘Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people.’”

As creatures of habit, we often resist change. Consistency is an important and healthy part of life, but only when our consistency is invested in behaviors that are life-giving. We sometimes resist change from our norm, even when our norm is unhealthy and the change is what we need.

When the children of Israel were freed from slavery, they had to rebuild trust in God. There was a point where they were afraid they would starve and wanted to return to Egypt where, though enslaved, they had food to eat. They needed time to rebuild trust with God. They needed time to grieve and let go of coping mechanisms that had brought them comfort in suffering. They had to learn how to be free.

Change can be hard and is often hindered by our fears of the unknown. “Rather the demon I know than the one I don’t,” as the saying goes. But what if the goal is no demon at all?

If we are so polarized in our belief that it is either this or that, then we leave no room for that of which we cannot conceive — the work of God.

It seems redundant and a bit understated to say that 2020 has been a hard year. Consistent complex trauma can make pain feel more normative than healing and freedom.

In such challenging times, it could help to remember God’s presence shows up not during the gaiety of the day, but during the uncertainty of the night. Jesus was born at night.

The shepherds who were tending sheep in this Luke passage did so during the night shift. Darkness was part of their familiar routine, and so the unexpected appearance of light invoked fear.

Could the light of hope be showing up in our darkest hour, but instead of joy, we are experiencing fear?

Are we more accustomed to darkness than light, to the extent that the hope of light invokes hesitation? We must not be afraid to embrace the light, however unexpected, for it comes with good news that will cause great joy.

Advent prepares us to enter a new year with the courage to embrace opportunities that teach us how to live free.

Prophetic Practice:

Take a day, hour, or minute to give yourself permission not to be afraid to hope. Even if only as a momentary practice, feel the freedom of believing the impossible is possible.

Why We Need Courage to Embrace God’s Good News was originally published in Hush Harbor on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

The true light that gives light to everyone was coming into the world. He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him.

John 1:9–10

In elementary school during recess, two team captains allotted by the teacher would, one by one, pick members of the class for their team. The process was quite flattering for the more athletic kids, and quite excruciating for those always picked last. Having the best players made a team captain feel their win was absolute.

When they align with our belief system or reasoning, absolutes present the illusion of control. There’s something comforting about believing our way is the only right way, or that we know what’s right all the time — about being certain, even about the future.

Reality, however, is quite a different matter. There are fewer absolutes in life than many of us would like to admit. And the few that exist are likely to make us uncomfortable because they hold us to a standard.

For example, everyone is created in the image of God. Period.

If the lowliest among us matter — the ones always picked last —then how we treat them matters.

Everyone: it’s a word we may hear on a daily basis, but if we pause to consider its implications, we realize how absolute it is. It’s a word that provides no exceptions.

The light of Jesus is for everyone, not some. Light is given to the invisible and the entitled, to the humble and the arrogant, the rich and the poor. Light is given to the world by the one whose love created it, even though that world didn’t recognize him.

The God who was born, not in a state-of-the-art facility, but on the ground where animals defecate, is more easily recognized by those who are low enough to witness it. Those who are in proximity to that experience have a greater vantage point.

The lowly don’t seem to matter to us, but the fact that God became a lowly person ensures tells us otherwise. The world didn’t imagine God would enter the world as God did, and many hadn’t imagined a low-born Savior.

Light is given, but whether we receive or not, live in it or not, are changed by it or not, is dependent upon our ability to recognize God’s presence in the least, lost, and lowly.

This Advent the light is bright, but if we can’t see it, perhaps we’re limited by our ideas of where we believe the light should be.

Prophetic Practice:

Reflect on where in life you feel most in control. Is that a place God has been invited into? Take a moment and welcome the light of God and welcome the illumination.

Why God’s Light Is for Absolutely Everyone was originally published in Hush Harbor on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

But do not ignore this one fact, beloved, that with the Lord one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like one day. The Lord is not slow about his promise, as some think of slowness, but is patient with you, not wanting any to perish, but all to come to repentance.

But, in accordance with his promise, we wait for new heavens and a new earth, where righteousness is at home. Therefore, beloved, while you are waiting for these things, strive to be found by him at peace, without spot or blemish

— 2 Peter 3:8–9;13–14

Early in the pandemic, several celebrities were slammed for social media posts where they lounged by their pools or in their posh homes, complaining about “the struggle” of sheltering in. While Covid-19 has forced entire nations to a halt this year, it’s also revealed not all waiting is created equal.

Some suffer more than others, and in a pandemic, those who suffer more may be so inclined to just be done.

To be done is to stop. It is to cease engaging, doing, working, trying.

Giving up on the hope that freedom and whole life is possible means we stop actively working to encourage change. Though understandable, this approach can actually be dangerous. If I stop wearing a mask and social distancing because I'm fatigued from waiting for a post-pandemic world, I only increase my chances of getting and spreading Covid-19.

Yet, the disappointment of multiple unmet expectations and desires can wear you down and disrupt your peace.

Amid so many stressors, traumas, and struggles, how do we maintain the will to keep pressing and still have a semblance of peace?

Of course, regular self-care and healthy mental, emotional, and spiritual support are always at the top of the list.

In addition to all those things, 2 Peter may have something for us to consider during this Advent season. This passage challenges us in a season of unmet expectations.

God’s concept of time is not our concept of time. Some of us have heard those words a million times, yet we sometimes still fear that the waiting for what we hope for will never end, or perhaps that we’re waiting in vain. What gives us the peace of knowing that not yet does not always mean not ever? Trust. The history we have with the character of a people or system matters.

Maya Angelo once said:

When a person shows you who they are, believe them.

Listen closely, again:

The Lord is not slow (or slack) in keeping God’s promise, as some understand slowness. Instead, God is patient (or long suffering) with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but all to come to repentance.

Just as time is not the same for God as it for us, God’s character isn’t like any person’s we’ve ever known.

God doesn’t renege on promises made. We do. Families do. Systems do.

God’s character is love. God doesn’t just love, God is love.

And God’s love is without disparity.

God does not pick and choose who to love or when to love — God loves. And because of God’s love, God’s justice is also inevitable. Those who oppress need the accountability of justice in order to also have access to salvation.

As we wait for new heavens and earth where righteousness will be at home, our struggle with what feels like delayed justice on God’s behalf may be a misinterpretation of God’s loving character. God hasn’t forgotten us, but is patiently at work on bringing all of us — even those who cause harm — into right relationship.

Advent beckons us to the truth that hope is not seeing the way out, but knowing there always is a way out. Hope is knowing that God’s character is trustworthy. This offers enough peace while we wait for us to not give up.

What we experience as a delay from God is actually the reassurance that our hope is not in vain. It is the sign that Divine love for all without exception is intact, and therefore so are God’s promises.

Prophetic Practice:

Take a few moments to consider where in your life you have lost hope. What have you stopped praying for? Have an honest talk with God about it.

This is part 2 of Hush Harbor’s Advent series from Rev. Dr. Donna C. Battle. Click here to read Part 1: Why Disruption is Necessary for Change.

How to Endure God’s Timing was originally published in Hush Harbor on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down,

that the mountains would tremble before you!

As when fire sets twigs ablaze

and causes water to boil,

come down to make your name known to your enemies

and cause the nations to quake before you!

(Isaiah 64:1–2)

I once had someone ask me why protesters would block major highways in the Bay area after each death of an unarmed Black person. The question was genuinely prompted by their inability to see how such an act in any way contributes to constructive change.

I asked them what they knew about the death of unarmed black and brown people before the protest. And I saw the moment they made the connection.

Disruption for the purpose of change and innovation is always accompanied by the kind of revelation that unsettles and is often painful to acknowledge.

In truth, pain is the greatest motivator of change. A wise mystic once wrote:

The truth will set you free, but it will make you miserable first.

The prophet Isaiah, praying from an unsettling place of pain and need, calls upon God to tear open the heavens and come down. Isaiah calls for a holy disruption that is like fire that burns wood and boils water. Isaiah needs those causing pain to feel the pain — because what else could possibly be enough to bring change?

James Baldwin in his book The Fire Next Time asserts that the plight of the marginalized will not cease until all experience marginalization — all must live the struggle. It’s what we cannot see, what we refuse to understand that will cause us the most harm. Ignorance may be bliss but it won’t protect us from the realities that exist whether we know those realities to be true or not.

The prophet calls for a holy disruption that unsettles and then brings revelation. “Come down to make your name known…”

Holy disruption reveals, unsettles, and may even be painful to acknowledge but it leads us back to proper relationship with the Divine. It reveals in a way that produces awe and trembling at the sight of the God of all creation.

Advent brings a holy disruption through a Savior who enters in an unexpected way. Locating the need for change in systems that cause us pain can sometimes be a clearer view than noticing how the pain has also caused a need for change in us.

Where might we need to welcome such a holy disruption in our own life — are we open to the revelation that leads to life? What if peace and hope this season are being served on a platter of interruption? As we press with God to disrupt the oppression of the world we must also allow the press in us that God might disrupt the oppressive beliefs, thoughts, and practices that hold hostage peace and hope in our own lives.

Come O God and tear open the barricades of our hearts. Disrupt the places of our lives that keep us from the gifts you so freely give. Continuously make room in us for the change we fight for in our families and in the world.

Prophetic Practice:

This week take 10 minutes each day, be still, breathe deep and invite God to disrupt your thoughts and actions with a moment of peace.

Why Disruption Is Necessary for Change was originally published in Hush Harbor on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.