Must Read

What’s That Thing About No Stupid Questions Again?

Show Off Them Hips

Dispatches From the Nether Regions

Blurred Vision

MEL@Dusk

Magdalene Taylor is an editorial assistant and contributor at MEL. She loves Korn, Juggalos, and being a dumb bitch. She lives in LA but is from God’s country, Western Massachusetts.

Coronavirus Racism, Nude Storage Calculus and Fake Meat for Lent was originally published in MEL Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

When you think of Woodstock, you probably think of muddy hippies, hallucinogens and Jimi Hendrix. Well, this story from a guy at Woodstock who took the notorious “brown acid” has all of that. But there are a few details that may change your perception of the festival forever: Namely, the bit about some Hells Angels types essentially spoon-feeding zonked out hippies Chef Boyardee ravioli from an industrial-sized can. Personally, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to think about Woodstock again without that image popping into my head.

Must Read

RIP James Lipton

Other Good Stuff

Debunking the Latest Coronavirus Bullshit

A Not-So-Beautiful Game?

Paging Captain Obvious

Bag It Up

MEL@Dusk

Magdalene Taylor is an editorial assistant and contributor at MEL. She loves Korn, Juggalos, and being a dumb bitch. She lives in LA but is from God’s country, Western Massachusetts.

The Real ‘Brown Acid’ at Woodstock, The Rise of Gentrifying Ghost Kitchens and RIP James Lipton was originally published in MEL Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

This week’s been all coronavirus, all the time — and for good reason. Honestly, it might be better for us all to turn off our brains for awhile, since it seems like the only thing the news has been doing is making us anxious. On an immediate level, the stress is probably worse for your health. But who knows, maybe by the time you’re reading this, we’ll all be under mandatory quarantine in our homes. And if that’s the case, at least you’ll have plenty of time to read about what it’s like to teach white-collar criminals about prison.

Must Read

Other Long Reads from the Week That Was

The Aforementioned Coronavirus (Like You’re Thinking About Anything Else, Anyway)

The Teeth-Dick Nexus

Expert Opinions

More Good Stuff

Now You See It…

MEL@Dusk

But Don’t Just Take Our Word For It…

Magdalene Taylor is an editorial assistant and contributor at MEL. She loves Korn, Juggalos, and being a dumb bitch. She lives in LA but is from God’s country, Western Massachusetts.

Everything Coronavirus, the Truth About Bernie Bros and Prepping for Prison was originally published in MEL Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

When it comes to guys, we’re not all bad. For instance, we don’t all talk shit about our exes, or think owning only one bath towel is normal, or think saying “calm down” is the ideal method for diffusing conflict.

Yep, it’s not just the red flags that you need to consider when dating a dude — there’s also the “green flags,” which highlight what’s actually, ya know, good about us. I mean, jeez, what’s it gonna take for someone to talk about our green flags?!?!

Oh 👇look 👇weird 👇.

MUST READ

SCAM ALERT

POST-GRIDIRON GREATNESS

#DEMDEBATE #RIPKOBE #BTSFOREVER

FROM THE SERVICE DEPT.

THE MONEY SHOT

Jeff Gross is MEL’s senior editor for social media and content marketing. His daily ICYMI column, which chronicles all things meta on the site, is the quickest way to catch up on MEL.

#KPop #stans #cantstop #infiltrating #hashtags #coronavirus #RIPKobe was originally published in MEL Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

One could make the argument (quite easily, in fact) that White America needs an education on the history of racism in this country, as well as the role oppression has played in our country’s history. That said, there’s a right way to teach that history, and there’s a wrong way.

Strapped to a chair Clockwork Orange-style and forced to watch the nine-hour miniseries Roots falls in the second camp.

Must Read

Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?

This Will Break Your Heart

The American Political Id

Big Sounds

YouTube and Chill

From the Service Dept.

MEL@Dusk

Jeff Gross is MEL’s senior editor for social media and content marketing. His daily ICYMI column, which chronicles all things meta on the site, is the quickest way to catch up on MEL.

Strapped in ‘Clockwork Orange’-style and forced to watch ‘Roots’ was originally published in MEL Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

If lawyers were the scourge of the professional class in the 1990s, landlords certainly own that title now. I mean, have you ever met a landlord you liked? They seem to exist only to fuck people out of money. Two of the worst humans (and Donalds) in existence, Donald Trump and Donald Sterling, were noted slumlords.

Coincidence? I think not.

So it’s no surprise to learn that landlords occasionally hold seminars to “improve their public image.” Personally, I think they’re fucked anyway.

Must Read

Ooh Yeah, Spank Me Nancy

We Know Who You Are Michael (And Peter)

Fido Needs a Dental Plan

Notable Side Effects Include…

Sue Me for Trying to Be Comfortable

Do You Even Fashion, n00b?

From the Service Dept.

The Invisible (Wo)man

MEL@Dusk

Jeff Gross is MEL’s senior editor for social media and content marketing. His daily ICYMI column, which chronicles all things meta on the site, is the quickest way to catch up on MEL.

Landlords Are Attempting to Rehab Their Image in the Most Landlord-y Way was originally published in MEL Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

My favorite kind of article we do here at MEL are the ones where we go, “You know who’s a total daddy? This guy you probably hadn’t publicly admitted to being attracted to before.”

This week, we finally admitted our feelings for Rick Moranis, perhaps the 1980s and 1990s most iconic sexy nerd. I watched Spaceballs probably once a week growing up, despite not knowing any of the inside jokes (Star Wars fandom is for chumps). And why did I do that?

Because Rick Moranis as Dark Helmet, obviously.

Must Read

Workers (And Cartoon Characters) Unite!

The Week in Money

Remember That Thing?

Don’t Let It Go to (Your) Waist

The Long(ish) Reads

Everything Else That Was Great

But Don’t Just Take Our Word For It…

Magdalene Taylor is an editorial assistant and contributor at MEL. She loves Korn, Juggalos, and being a dumb bitch. She lives in LA but is from God’s country, Western Massachusetts.

A History of wikiFeet, Stabbing People on LSD and Rick Moranis, Daddy was originally published in MEL Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

I’ve always stood by the idea that “Florida Man” is a myth, perpetuated solely by the fact that Florida has open public-record laws. But there is something chaotic about Florida (and here, I’m speaking as someone who lived there for four years, and has dated someone born and raised in Miami for five).

For instance — and I’m not sure if you knew this — but the dong-shaped state has a massive massive-python problem. No, I’m not talking about its citizen’s penises, I’m talking about the giant Burmese pythons that are eating every pet in sight. It’s that damn heat that keeps them there, and probably what also makes people do all the crazy shit of the “Florida Man” legend, too.

So maybe there is something to it after all.

Must Read

Today’s Wife Guy

The Other Good Stuff

No Stupid Questions

The Roasted Red Peppers Are In the Balls

MEL@Dusk

Magdalene Taylor is an editorial assistant and contributor at MEL. She loves Korn, Juggalos, and being a dumb bitch. She lives in LA but is from God’s country, Western Massachusetts.

Skinning Florida’s Python Problem, the Pigs of Personal Finance and Justin Bieber, Wife Guy was originally published in MEL Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Here’s something that’s sure to blow your mind: It’s not just incels who feel that it’s their “inferior” looks and personality that makes them unfuckable. In the first piece from this week’s special issue on “Women of the Manosphere,” Isabelle Kohn documents the rise of female incels, aka “femcels,” who have begun surfacing on online forums for the involuntarily celibate with the same, ass-backwards worldview. It’s an intense ride.

Must Read

Bloomberg’s Soda Problem

More Proof Bitcoin is the Cure for Everything

We Are Once Again Asking for Your Support

Heeere’s Joker!

More from our Oscar’s Coverage

Robin’s Got a GREAT Ass

From the Service Dept.

Just a Reminder

MEL@Dusk

Jeff Gross is MEL’s senior editor for social media and content marketing. His daily ICYMI column, which chronicles all things meta on the site, is the quickest way to catch up on MEL.

Holy Butt Cheeks, Batman! was originally published in MEL Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

The Taut-Ass Coefficient, A History of the Members Only Jacket and the Dark Crimes of the Hamburglar

Allow me to rock your world: This week we learned that the “tautness” of an ass has nothing to do with whether or not you could bounce a quarter off of it. In fact, it’s funny that an ass you “could bounce a quarter off of” was ever used to describe a great butt, considering that phrase originally described tightly made military beds. What one has to do with the other I’ll never know. Besides, these days everyone loves a fat ass!

In any case, it’s nice to know that you can be carrying a semi-truck behind you, and a quarter will likely still bounce off it if you really tried.

Must Read

More Coinage

Tickets From the Heavens

Card Games

The Perils of Turning the Frown of Your Sad Salad Upside-Down

Yet Another Humble Plea to Stop With All the Retreads Already

The Culture Stuff

Evidence That We Should Be Arrested

Tweet of the Week

But Don’t Just Take Our Word For It…

Magdalene Taylor is an editorial assistant and contributor at MEL. She loves Korn, Juggalos, and being a dumb bitch. She lives in LA but is from God’s country, Western Massachusetts.

The Taut-Ass Coefficient, A History of the Members Only Jacket and the Dark Crimes of the… was originally published in MEL Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.