Rant — Injuries
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Venting out, don’t expect to have value out of it — it is me venting out.
Back in August, I upped my training for preparation for Tactical Games.
Side note on that — it turned out you have to prepare and can’t just walk in there and rock it — did a “whole” month of preparation.
Two trainings a day: cross training in the morning and jiu jitsu in the evening. Overall, solid.
Two weeks before the competition, I started having pain in the inner thigh — but as we used to say in the IDF, “Be rabaak,” and I can walk it off, just stretch. Did some physio, needles and all — just push it.
TTG came and went, pushing through; reduced training to the normal one time a day; still pain. Then, a coach I really respect, Chris Thompson, in a class tells me, “You should really check it, mate.” Now he is not a gentle soul.
Another coach I really respect, Isaac Oasis, tells me, “ Hey, don’t be stupid, you won’t be able to train at the end.
When a third person I respect nudged me, I figured, ok, maybe it is a thing. With the help of Jaqueline, Oasis reached out to movico — turns out to be a tear in the abductor (that inner thigh pain that radiated to the groin and me being afraid of having manly problems). With the help of Pablo — started to recover — now it is January, and only now the tear almost healed.
Mid analysis — me being dum dum, my doctor (redacted for his privacy, but you can suspect who) told me not to do sprints — well, age and all — what did I do? Prove him wrong, sprint with 10 kg, in a pace that I could not do when I was in the service on the field
To the point of this story — then the fear started to set in, the fear during rounds, the fear of actually tearing the abductor and being helpless, the fear of incorrect movement and of sharp pain, the fear of someone swiping me too hard on MMA or grappling, the fear of lifting the fear that leads to inconfidence that gradually leads to incompetence. That fear is paralyzing, demoralizing, and affects all aspects of daily life — I felt how it even crept into my work.
Now, some people choose and choose not to even try, not to even get that fear, not to fail — and it is their choice, but for sure, not even trying creeps one more.
The only way to fight fear is to face it, to keep pushing, to keep the grind, to know that nothing will beat you or put you down — no matter how severe the fear is — people endured such hardships that our daily life is nothing compared to that — simply nothing.
Stay fearless — or at least strive to be.
