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CHILDREN’S LITERATURE
Horton Gets a Handy
With apologies to Dr. Seuss
Ran into a story today of a zoo visitor disturbed by the sight of an elephant’s erection. Her suggestion was that the situation could be avoided if the zoo staff “took care of the poor animals and RELEIVED THEM.”
It touched me, and I was moved to verse. I’m sure Mr. Geisel would be proud.
A lady she woke up
and went to the zoo,
to visit the monkey,
lion, bat, and gnu.
She came to the elephant,
all wrinkled and gray.
But this time was different,
it was no average day!
She was astonished to see
‘neath the great pachyderm,
there hung a vast cannon
for his pachyderm sperm!
Now of all that you’ll see
in your lifetime, I’ll bet
an elephant’s member
isn’t one you’ll forget.
The beasts are enormous,
with huge ears and long trunk.
But you’ve ne’er seen the like
of an elephant’s junk!
