MEN ARE SCUM!…
… And you can’t even tell me otherwise.
I met A. last summer at a mutual friend’s party in Lagos. We both wanted to get away from the long rigmaroles traditional weddings in Africa had a knack for. But fate had other plans. Or so I thought.
We bumped into each other and immediately, a friendship kicked off. Just like those Telemundo love stories, everything seemed perfect. We had the same interests, energy, pet peeves and right about similar ambitions. We talked hours on end, video-called like our lives depended on it, and went on dates like it was a ritual.
Meeting each other was on cue as we had both just come out of toxic relationships. He proved me right that loving hard and being loyal wasn’t a bad thing like Twitter critics made it seem. We were in love, and marriage talks were coming in, after all.
Come June this year, he had to travel to South Africa for work and I helped him pack. Dropped him at the airport and he promised he couldn’t wait to be back so we make plans on visiting each other’s parents. ‘Finally’! I thought.
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As a female that loves love, my mind was racing with imaginations on how he’d propose and how many karat gold the ring would be. I even began searching out the best wedding planners, exotic halls, and binge-watching proposal and wedding videos on YouTube.
Don’t you dare judge me. Right about every girl is guilty of this at some point in their lives. Despite being on the same page with A. about ‘taking things to the level’, I made sure to conceal my excitement. I didn’t want to appear desperate. Girl’s got some pride yunno.
A week into his travel, A. wasn’t communicating as much. For 4 days, there was an excuse to not talk to me. I didn’t read meaning to it as I felt his schedule was crazy and I trusted him.
Trust. Isn’t that what relationships are about?
Like your instincts are telling you, IT ENDED IN TEARS. PREMIUM TEARS. It’s been 2 months and I’m still in tears. 2 months since A. ghosted me. Without reason. Without explanation. Like a pack of hot potatoes.
And no! He’s not dead.
He’s in fact back to the country and back to his ex. He’s blocked me everywhere, changed his house, and blacklisted my visits at his workplace.
I should probably move on. But I love him. I’m stressed mentally and have developed trust issues.
Now I’m left wondering, was I just a stress ball to him? A rebound? Don’t I deserve love? Am I cursed?
Maybe #No-love #Hardguy Twitter is right after all. Loving hard and staying loyal is a myth after all.
Do you think so too?
