Just another low IQ idiot who is mad that I am better than him at games and life. Sad.

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　 　　　／` ミ＿xノ
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　　　 /　 ヽ　　 ﾉ
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　| (￣ヽ＿ヽ)__)
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　　　　　／＞　　フ
　　　　　| 　　 l
　 　　　／` ミ＿xノ
　　 　 /　　　 　 |
　　　 /　 ヽ　　 ﾉ
　 　 │　　|　|　|
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　| (￣ヽ＿ヽ)__)
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for a long time I thought a lot of classes had "the jerker" bc for 4 years I had to watch someone jerk off everyday in class. one guy was in 6th grade the other one from 7th to 9th. they both sat in the front row right in front of the teachers. they were also both really gross and would constantly rub their hands everywhere and on everyone. the second guy would jerk off (slight moaning), then put a finger in his ear and lick his hands to finally rub them on the table. he once did it while looking directly at the math teacher while she was less than 1m away from him. she was so ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ uncomfortable and kept asking him to stop while he looked deep into her soul and repeated that he didn't know what she was talking about. the dude was always really ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ creepy, I was friends with his twin sister and she said that she was so scared of him she would always lock her door at night so he wouldn't go in. I wish I was joking or making at least part of this up

The other day, my son came home for Christmas with his new partner. I was excited to meet her, but imagine my horror when it turned out to be another man. I immediately started to protest, but my son said "Dad, this is who I am" Without missing a beat, I turned around and said, "You forgot to say NO H0M0" But my boy simply scoffed at me and said, "Actually dad, I AM a homosexual" I stared straight at my son, penetrating his soul with my eyes, and said, "But that's gay." As soon as I said that, my son began to convulse. He dropped to floor in some sort of manic state, spit pouring from his mouth as his eyes rolled back into his head. His bf tried to help him, but I pushed that dainty little queer away with my heteronormative strength. After a full minute, my son opened his eyes and said, "Dad, you cured me of my homosexuality." Then he pointed at that queer and said, "Let's get that hom0!" After we wiped Brian's blood off our hands, we sat down with a beer and watched some football.

Second grade survival guide:

• second grade gets HARD. Stay on top of all your homework.

• in sexond grade you learn the hard $hit. Multiplication is no joke. may b get a tutor

• grammer and speling will kill you so practiece a lot

• dronk water

• study 40 hours a day

• dating gets real. this is the grade to get a serious boy/girlfriend. this isn’t 1st grade anymore. cooties aren’t a thing anymore.

• if u get a bad grade punch ur teacher in their crotch!

• 99.99% of people lose their virginity in 2nd grade. don’t get left behind

• girls: no more shopping at justice or baby gap anymore. shop at the real stores now. Like Victoria secret and brandy Melville

• guys: wear heelies to get all the hoes

• you should defiantly know where you wanna go to college at this point

• take all ap classes

• $hit your pants on the first day of school to assert your dominance

This game is utter ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. First of all, my ♥♥♥♥ is NOT that big in real life. I wish the developer added the ability to change your penis size for a more realistic and immersive experience. Also, the game is very buggy. My biggest gripe is that the car in the garage is not proper scale. In real life, the vehicle's front bumper would be slightly below knee high for me. In the game, the girl was sitting on the car and I was able to casually insert my member into her mouth while she sat upright. This would make me at LEAST 12 feet tall. it's sickening how inaccurate the scale is in this game. Also, the game contains many plot holes and unresolved subplots. Why did I pack up my tools if I wasn't going to use them? Why did she call a handyman to fix her computer? I appreciate the fourth wall joke by showing the game title on the computer, but it ultimately broke my immersion