- 1 week ago
- #realityinsighthub
#
#RealityInsightHub
🎞 Please subscribe to our official channel to watch the full movie for free, as soon as possible. ❤️Reality Insight Hub❤️
👉 Official Channel: />👉 THANK YOU ⭐❤️❤️❤️⭐
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00changed my life. He's just not that into you. Yeah, yeah. I stayed up all last night reading it
00:05and you know what I learned? No guy has ever been that into me. Chloe, honey. No, no, I'm serious.
00:13There's something about me that's just not grabbing him, you know? So after a lot of soul
00:18searching, after analyzing every aspect of my personality, I've decided what I really need
00:22to change, you know, about myself, is I gotta get bigger boobs. You don't need a boob job.
00:29Your boobs are fine. Fine? Great. I could be the centerfold in Fine magazine. That's hot.
00:35Good morning. Hey, Mary. Good morning, Mary. Hear your messages, girls. You got a bunch of calls about that co-op on 89th Street and one of your old boyfriends called. You are so lucky. The only time I ever hear from my old boyfriends is when they star 69 me. I hope you told him I'm married now. I did. Which reminds me, here's your wedding gift. Aw. Thank you. Don't bother. It's three of those hideous spoons you registered for.
00:59But here's the real gift. Some unsolicited advice from someone who's been there. The first year's the worst. The sooner it's over, the better. The seventh year, you're gonna want to sleep with his brother. Don't.
01:11After that, it's pretty good. Either because your love has grown deeper and stronger or you're both too damn fat to attract anyone else.
01:21Mazel tov.
01:22Well, thank you for the spoons.
01:29Hi, Lola.
01:30Hey, sweetie.
01:31Hi, girls.
01:32Our first client will be here soon, so I'd put everything out.
01:37I'll say.
01:40Well, what's with the dress?
01:41Well, I wanted your opinion. I've decided that I'm ready to start dating again.
01:45Oh, that's great.
01:47Well, it's been six months since my divorce and, well, now I think that I don't have the, you know, the gaydar.
01:54Oh, sweetie, you've got plenty of the gaydar.
01:58I was married for ten years to a gay man. It's safe to say that I have less than some.
02:05So who's the lucky guy?
02:06A guy from my church.
02:08And I wanted to wear something that I'll know right away if he's straight.
02:11So what do you think?
02:14I think if he retains consciousness, he's gay.
02:18The shoes don't really match.
02:19Okay, if he notices the shoes, he's definitely gay.
02:24Eva, this is what I'm talking about right here.
02:26The, the, this, that, that, that's what I'm talking about.
02:33She wants a boob job.
02:35You don't need that.
02:36That's a little hard to take coming from you.
02:38Que chica.
02:42Well, hopefully mine will be changing too.
02:45Scott and I celebrated our two-month anniversary by going to see a fertility doctor.
02:49Oh.
02:50Scott was so sweet, he stayed with me through the whole exam.
02:53Great.
02:54So how did it go?
02:56Well, it was exciting and scary and it made me feel every one of my four, uh, 33 years.
03:04So we have to go back tomorrow afternoon so Scott can give his sample.
03:10Well, maybe the problem are his little swimmers.
03:12Yeah.
03:14Please, he's 25.
03:15His little swimmers could still medal in the Olympics.
03:17I do not want to see that Wheaties box.
03:24So does Scott know your real age?
03:28Well, I may have shaved off a year or two.
03:32Well, what are you going to tell him?
03:34He can do the math on my tombstone.
03:37But has his grade gotten to subtraction yet?
03:40Those jokes are getting old.
03:46Oh, like your husband.
03:51Scott and I made love three times last night.
03:55Not laughing about how young he is now, are ya?
04:00No, ma'am.
04:00Listen, I know he's young, but I love him, okay?
04:04And I just, I want him to feel like he's married someone who can give him everything he wants.
04:09God, I used to laugh at women who were so desperate to get married and have children.
04:13Yeah, we're a stitch.
04:17And let me tell you something.
04:19This fertility stuff is expensive.
04:21So are boobs.
04:22We need a big sale.
04:23When is a trust fund Barbie getting here?
04:27Any minute.
04:28And her name is Emerson Ives, and this apartment's a wedding gift from her parents.
04:32She just got engaged.
04:33She's young, rich, and never worked a day in her life.
04:36Ugh, is there anything more nauseating than the recently engaged?
04:39Everything's, oh, my fiancé, this, my fiancé, that.
04:42And then there's that obnoxious squeal and dip with the ring.
04:45Ugh.
04:46Just makes me want to kick their happy little ass.
04:49Sir, son.
04:52It's Emerson.
04:53Emerson, yes.
04:54Hi.
04:54Your congratulations are in order?
04:56Yes.
04:57Well, let's see the ring.
04:59No!
05:02I'm Ava Summerlin, and this is Chloe Reed and Lola Hernandez.
05:06Hola.
05:07Hello.
05:09I better go change.
05:12Well, you don't see that every day.
05:22Yeah, there's some women that you're jealous of, and sometimes you just have to tip your hat to God and say,
05:28nice job.
05:30Ah, shall we sit down?
05:32So, will I be working with all three of you?
05:34Yes.
05:35We work as a team here.
05:37I started this company ten years ago with the philosophy that we're not just real estate agents.
05:42We're matchmakers for people and homes.
05:44So, tell us a little bit about you.
05:46Are you currently living with your fiancé?
05:47Oh, no.
05:48Now, I know it's really old-fashioned, but we believe in waiting until we're married.
05:53Wow.
05:53That almost makes it sound like you're both virgins.
05:55Yeah.
05:55You know, we just want our first time to be something that we'll both cherish and remember our whole lives.
06:10Oh, God.
06:11I hope somebody told you the first time really sucks.
06:21Oh, Oprah did a show on the new virginity.
06:23Did you guys see it?
06:24I see what it is.
06:25Okay, how funny was that when she called out that guy for lying?
06:27That's really funny.
06:27He was a hero.
06:28I've never really seen Oprah.
06:31You've never watched Oprah?
06:32How is that possible?
06:34She's amazing.
06:35Oprah's kind of like our God.
06:36Our friend.
06:36And we get mad when she talks about her real friend, Gail.
06:39Gail.
06:41I'm sorry.
06:42I just don't watch that much television.
06:44I guess I just prefer reading.
06:50Oprah reads.
06:53Wait.
06:54I think I found the perfect match for you.
06:57The townhouse on Barrow Street.
06:59Oh, she loved it.
07:00Oh, it's four bedrooms, a huge master bath.
07:02And a fabulous mahogany staircase.
07:04She knows what she's talking about.
07:05Her father and uncles are all cabinet makers.
07:08Yes, I've spent my life surrounded by men with wood.
07:11We could arrange a viewing tomorrow.
07:20Oh, that would be great.
07:22My fiancé and I will be there.
07:23I'll show you a picture of my fiancé.
07:26How long have you been engaged?
07:28To my fiancé?
07:29I'm going to kill her.
07:32Two weeks.
07:34Here's Graham.
07:35Oh, so handsome.
07:36Very handsome.
07:37Cute.
07:38Here you go.
07:39Well, I'll see you guys tomorrow.
07:42Avec fiancé.
07:43Ciao.
07:44I will, uh, I'll call you with the details.
07:48Okay, bye.
07:49Bye-bye.
07:50Bye-bye.
07:54Well, I'll tell you one thing.
07:57That guy's no virgin.
07:59I know.
08:00I mean, I no-no.
08:10I know.
08:14I, uh, no-no, too.
08:16So, we both slept with our client's fiancé.
08:37Boy, what are the odds?
08:39Pretty good.
08:39What?
08:48Let's face it.
08:48You guys are kind of slutty.
08:53Excuse me.
08:54I am not slutty.
08:55I am easy.
08:58It's subtle, but there's a difference.
09:01And I slept with Graham before I met Scott,
09:03and it was just a one-night thing.
09:05Yeah, me, too.
09:06And then he kept calling and calling.
09:09You, too?
09:09No, no.
09:13I wanted him to call.
09:14I waited for him to call.
09:15Oh, I'm sorry.
09:16I guess he just wasn't that into me.
09:21Yeah, poor Emerson.
09:22If he slept with both of you,
09:24how many more have there been?
09:25Men are such vile, disgusting pigs.
09:28There's the line a guy wants to enter on.
09:32Hey, sellers.
09:33Ladies, do you mind?
09:34I'm all out.
09:35And this last therapy patient
09:36almost put me to sleep.
09:38What's his problem?
09:40Multiple personalities.
09:42All of them dull.
09:45Hey, everybody.
09:46Hey, Charlie.
09:47Dr. Boyd.
09:48Dr. Thorpe.
09:50Hey, who's that babe who just left?
09:53You're a plastic surgeon.
09:54Don't you have babes down the hall to hit on?
09:56Yes, but my patients frown on my dating them.
10:00Well, with all the Botox, they don't actually frown.
10:04But there's a telling glare.
10:07Guys, sorry, we're kind of in the middle of a situation here.
10:11That babe that just left, well, we both...
10:13They will stoop her fiancé who she thinks never stooped anyone.
10:18Then why don't you just tell the guy that you won't blow his cover
10:20if he won't blow the deal?
10:22It's a win-win.
10:24It's like sucking fat out of someone's ass
10:25and injecting it into their lips.
10:29I do it ten times a day.
10:30So when we get to the townhouse, Lola,
10:39you'll keep Emerson occupied while Chloe and I deal with Graham.
10:42Yes, remember, girls, this could be a big sale for us.
10:45And driver, there's no rule that the third person has to sit in the front.
10:49It's a new rule.
10:54You're married?
10:55Divorced.
10:57What was he, gay?
10:58Yes.
11:00So, Lola, tell us about your date.
11:04Well, it started out okay,
11:05but then I couldn't stop looking for the gay clues.
11:11Sir, our waiter is very handsome, huh?
11:14He's okay.
11:15There's no way that's his real hair, though.
11:19Are you being observant or you're being bitchy?
11:23Let's just forget about the waiter.
11:25You look amazing.
11:27That dress.
11:28And those shoes.
11:32You said if he noticed the shoes, he was gay.
11:34I was kidding about the shoes.
11:37But is he gay?
11:38Who knows?
11:39I just made an excuse and left.
11:42So how did it go for you at the clinic?
11:44Well, Scott gave his sample.
11:46Okay, doing this doesn't make it any less gross.
11:49They sent him into this room with all kinds of magazines and porn.
11:54Now, why is it the guys need that?
11:55I mean, my God, are their imaginations really that limited?
11:58We are very visual.
12:01So after he left, I peeked in to see what he looked at.
12:04And it was open to her picture.
12:07All that porn and he's looking at People magazine?
12:10Hey, sometimes I use good housekeeping.
12:11The magazine's not the point, okay?
12:15It's her.
12:16I mean, what is she, 18?
12:18This isn't like you, sweetie.
12:20I know.
12:20It's just that between this and the fertility treatment...
12:23Oh, well, excuse me for not having a man to complain about.
12:26Here we have home Carrera marble countertops.
12:32And this is Brazilian olive wood flooring.
12:34And this door leads to a small room that could be used for linen closet or for storage.
12:38Or for my 18th century porcelain doll collection.
12:42You took the words right out of my mouth.
12:46Oh, that's Graham.
12:47I'm gonna let him in, okay?
12:49Thanks for everything.
12:51You guys are the best.
12:53Oh, I feel terrible.
12:55That poor girl.
12:56Oh, please.
12:57She's gonna be living in a $3 million townhouse with a gorgeous guy.
13:01Cry me a river.
13:03I'll go keep that mercy in the kitchen, okay?
13:08Oh, my God.
13:09This place is great.
13:12Oh, my God.
13:12Look at...
13:13Oh, my God.
13:18Ava.
13:19Hi, Graham.
13:21You mean you're the Ava that she's been...
13:24This is so weird.
13:25And incredibly embarrassing.
13:27God, you look amazing.
13:30I bet you're pretty embarrassed to see me, too.
13:34I'm sorry.
13:38Have we met?
13:46You don't remember me?
13:49At all?
13:51No.
13:51Should I?
13:52I know this is incredibly awkward, but I want to assure you that we will not say anything
13:57to Emerson, and I hope...
13:58There was a bar at Nobu, remember?
14:00And we both admitted we didn't know what Asian fusion was, and it was so cute, you said you're
14:04going to go talk to the sommelier about getting a better bottle of wine.
14:10What the hell are you doing?
14:11It is one thing to not be that into me, but to not remember me at all.
14:15I mean, there's not even a book for that.
14:18You know what the sickest thing is?
14:19I'm still attracted to you.
14:23Oh, he's unavailable and not interested.
14:26And what woman can resist that?
14:29Get a grip.
14:30Yeah, easy for you to say.
14:31This is the first time I've been in the shower with another person in two years.
14:35As I was saying, I hope that we can all be adults and proceed with the business at hand.
14:45Absolutely.
14:46Let's go see Emerson.
14:49I'm just going to bar you.
14:50Let's just...
14:51Remember you said my eyes sparkled when I laughed?
14:55You remember saying that?
14:58See?
15:02Sorry.
15:02No, no, no, no, no.
15:03You spilled a glass of wine on my shirt.
15:05You said, don't worry, the dry cleaners can get it out.
15:06Which, by the way, they couldn't.
15:08But that's not the point.
15:08You don't remember any of this?
15:10Sorry.
15:11Do you remember this?
15:12I want to buy it.
15:17See?
15:19Slotty.
15:24I can't believe you actually kissed him.
15:26How could you do something so unprofessional?
15:29And sloppy.
15:30Can you please give that word arrest?
15:33It's a good thing you like kissing so much because you can kiss your new boobs goodbye.
15:38Hey, you're getting new boobs?
15:39You don't need new boobs.
15:41I can get you silicone at saline prices.
15:43Buy one, you get one free.
15:45I'm sorry, all right?
15:47I lost my mind.
15:48I mean, he didn't even remember me.
15:50You know, I know that I'm a lot of things, but I didn't think I was forgettable.
15:54Well, the commission aside, there is someone who feels even worse than we do.
16:01Poor Emerson.
16:02She looks so upset when she ran out.
16:04And you need to go and find her and tell her that you kissed him.
16:09Yeah, but what if she asks why I kissed him?
16:11God, this is such a pain in the ass.
16:13Sir, son.
16:17It's Emerson.
16:18Yeah, it's Emerson.
16:19It's just such an unusual name.
16:21Um, it's more common than asserson.
16:25That's a good joke.
16:26Emerson, we are so sorry, personally, professionally.
16:29And I'm the one who kissed Graham.
16:32Well, that's what he said.
16:33He said that you were some kind of drunk, desperate psycho.
16:43He does remember me.
16:49Sorry, Emerson, go on.
16:51Well, at first I believed him, but then I went home and I turned on the TV and Oprah was on.
16:58And because of you guys, I watched it.
17:00Isn't Oprah great?
17:00And smart and real.
17:02Did she talk about girl?
17:04Well, the show was about men who deceived their wives.
17:08And all the guys on the show reminded me of Graham.
17:12And all the women on the show who were too stupid to see the truth reminded me of me.
17:18So, I'm here because I just gotta know the truth.
17:23Why did you kiss Graham?
17:31Graham is not a virgin.
17:34I slept with him.
17:36Oh, my God.
17:37But it was only once, and I'm sure it was before you started dating him.
17:41We've been dating since Cotillion.
17:46We don't know when that is.
17:52Sixth grade.
17:53Oh.
17:54Oh.
17:54Okay, well, well, uh, for what it's worth, he didn't tell me about you either.
18:01I just...
18:02Well, at least now I know the truth.
18:11Maybe it doesn't have to be the end of the world.
18:14No, no, no, no, no, no.
18:15Don't look at me.
18:15I was always faithful to my gay husband, right?
18:17Emerson, you must feel just awful, and we are so sorry.
18:25Thanks.
18:27I mean, I'm just in shock, though.
18:29Well, sweetie, luckily, there's one thing that has always helped women get through periods of transition and crisis.
18:38Friendship?
18:39Alcohol.
18:44Here's to saving me from a really lousy guy.
18:47Salud.
18:48Cheers.
18:49Let me get this round.
18:51Oh, this is a stupid magazine.
18:53I got mad at my husband for looking at it.
18:55What's this picture?
18:57Oh, my God.
18:58Eve, it's you.
18:59Naked.
19:00What?
19:03Do you know what this means?
19:06It means I've seen more of you than I've actually seen of myself.
19:09This is the picture that Scott was looking at when he gave his sample.
19:18Oh, that's so sweet.
19:19And disgusting.
19:20Yeah.
19:21You see, we're trying to...
19:23It's okay.
19:24Seems like you've got a really good guy.
19:26I do, don't I?
19:28And, sweetie, it's better to wait for the right one.
19:30It took me a very long time.
19:33But I have it now.
19:34Yeah, waiting a long time, theory.
19:37Working 80 to less well for me.
19:40No, no, no.
19:41Don't pay attention to her.
19:42There are plenty of great guys out there.
19:45Look at the one behind us.
19:47He's hot.
19:49Him?
19:50He's clearly gay.
19:52No.
19:52Get in.
19:53Come on.
19:53Let me show you.
19:54Okay.
19:58Hola.
19:58Fabulous shoes.
20:03Hey, queen.
20:04Really couldn't tell?
20:05She's gaydar challenge.
20:06But what am I looking for?
20:08Well, the purple shirt, for a starter.
20:09He was drinking an appletini.
20:11Yeah, his eyebrows were obviously waxed.
20:13It's also a gay bar.
20:14No, I'm kidding.
20:15I'm kidding.
20:15I'm kidding.
20:15Stop.
Be the first to comment