00:00Phil, Phil, hey, hey, come here, come here, uh, Phil, I'm, I'm gonna try to talk, and I'm trying to say something, something, do you know Lily, Phil, do you know her?
00:27No. Lily? No, I don't. Oh, she's my love, my life, love of it, yeah, in school, 12 years old, in school, in sixth grade, I saw her, yeah, I didn't go to that school,
00:47but, uh, we met, uh, my, my friend knew her, I said, uh, what's that girl, how's that Lily?
01:00Mm-hmm. Yeah, she's bad, she sleeps with guys, yeah, he said this, but then, sometimes, uh, and I, I went to another school, you see,
01:13uh, but then, uh, uh, when high school had an end, what's that, what is that, uh, when it gets to the end?
01:22Graduation. No, no, the grade, when grade, yeah.
01:25That's 12. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, so I went to her school for that grade, uh, grade, that's great, grade 12,
01:37and we meet, she was, like, like a doll, yeah, a beautiful porcelain doll,
01:50and the hips, the child-bearing hips, you know that, you know that, oh, so beautiful.
01:59Uh, and I cheated on her over and over and over again,
02:11because I wanted her to be a man, and I didn't want her to be a woman,
02:19you know, smart, free person, who was something.
02:25My fucking mind, then, my fucking mind, so stupid, that fucking mind, stupid.
02:35Jesus Christ.
02:39What would I think? Did I think for, for, for what I'd done?
02:43She was my wife for 23 years, and I, I went behind her over and over.
02:53Fucking asshole that I am, I'd go out and I'd, I'd, I'd fucking, I'd come home and get in her bed
03:00and say, I love you.
03:04This is Jack's mother, his mother, Lily, these two, that I had, and I lost.
03:21This is the regret that you make, this is the regret that you make, and the something you take,
03:37and the blah, blah, blah, something, something, yeah.
03:43Give me a cigarette.
03:49OK.
03:50OK.
03:53Yeah.
03:54Uh, yeah.
03:57¡Ah!
03:59Ah...
04:01Ah...
04:03Ah...
04:05Ah...
04:07Ah...
04:13Mistakes like this...
04:17...you don't make.
04:19Sometimes...
04:21...you make some...
04:25...you make some...
04:27...and okay.
04:29Not okay, sometimes.
04:31You make other ones.
04:33Yeah.
04:35Know that you should do better.
04:39I loved Lily.
04:43I cheated on her.
04:49She was my wife for 23 years.
04:53And I have a son.
04:57And she has cancer.
05:01And I'm not there.
05:03And he's forced...
05:05...to take care of her.
05:07He's 14 years old.
05:09To...
05:11...to...
05:13...to take care of his mother.
05:17And watch her die on him.
05:21With a little kid.
05:23And I'm not there.
05:25And she does die.
05:27And I'm not there.
05:33And she does die.
05:41I loved her so.
05:43And she knew what I did.
05:45And she knew all the fucking stupid things I'd done.
05:53But the love...
05:55...was stronger than anything you can think of.
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