Medium

Audrey Burges

Pinned

In

The Belladonna Comedy

by

Audrey Burges

·

Sep 25, 2020

Excerpts from The Erotic Thriller I Wrote Despite My Overwhelming Discomfort with Sex Scenes

I invite you to fill in the blanks.

Excerpts from The Erotic Thriller I Wrote Despite My Overwhelming Discomfort with Sex Scenes

In

Slackjaw

by

Audrey Burges

·

May 10, 2021

Our Family’s Swimsuits Were Designed By World-Famous Architect Frank Gehry, And Innovation Is Worth…

Kids, we haven’t planned a getaway in ages, and I think we deserve an escape — it’s time to squish our toes into soft sand, breathe in the…

Our Family’s Swimsuits Were Designed By World-Famous Architect Frank Gehry, And Innovation Is Worth…

In

Greener Pastures Magazine

by

Audrey Burges

·

Apr 20, 2021

A Beginner’s Guide to Power Washers

You never know what you may find.

A Beginner’s Guide to Power Washers

In

Frazzled

by

Audrey Burges

·

Apr 14, 2021

Things You’re Still Shouting At Your Colleagues Over Zoom, or Shouting At Your Children Who Are…

“Can you hear me?”

Things You’re Still Shouting At Your Colleagues Over Zoom, or Shouting At Your Children Who Are…

In

The Belladonna Comedy

by

Audrey Burges

·

Mar 17, 2021

An Oral History of Saint Patrick by the Snakes He Banished From Ireland

The real story behind one saint’s anti-herpetological agenda

An Oral History of Saint Patrick by the Snakes He Banished From Ireland

In

The Belladonna Comedy

by

Audrey Burges

·

Dec 10, 2020

I Shall Not Run, Gingerbread Man, and I Have Absolutely No Interest in Catching You

My children can explain my anti-chasing platform.

I Shall Not Run, Gingerbread Man, and I Have Absolutely No Interest in Catching You

In

The Belladonna Comedy

by

Audrey Burges

·

Nov 24, 2020

Remarks by an Archaeologist Excavating Ruins, or by Your Dad While Clearing Out the Fridge for…

It’s really cramped in here.

Remarks by an Archaeologist Excavating Ruins, or by Your Dad While Clearing Out the Fridge for…

In

Slackjaw

by

Audrey Burges

·

Nov 6, 2020

Pilot Transcript For HGTV’s “Playhouse Hunters”

Three property choices for a forced playdate.

Pilot Transcript For HGTV’s “Playhouse Hunters”

In

The Belladonna Comedy

by

Audrey Burges

·

Oct 20, 2020

As This Neighborhood’s Oldest Rubber Yard Zombie, I Call for an End to Our Severed Arms Race

We lurch toward Halloween amidst gaping societal wounds.

As This Neighborhood’s Oldest Rubber Yard Zombie, I Call for an End to Our Severed Arms Race

In

Frazzled

by

Audrey Burges

·

Oct 1, 2020

Games My Children Have Invented While We’re Trying to Avoid the Hospital

Hot Dog Snake!

Games My Children Have Invented While We’re Trying to Avoid the Hospital

Audrey Burges

Audrey Burges

Author, THE MINISCULE MANSION OF MYRA MALONE (Berkley 2023); work in McSweeney’s, Belladonna, Slackjaw, & elsewhere. Twitter: @audrey_burges; audreyburges.com.

Following

Help

Status

About

Careers

Press

Blog

Store

Privacy

Rules

Terms

Text to speech