Trouble
Trouble
Life brings trouble to all of us, at some time or another, in some way. When it comes, none of us want it. Sometimes it’s impossible to see a way out. Sometimes there isn’t a way out. What do we do then, when we feel trapped, squeezed, cornered by trouble?
The Lake District
In October 2015, I was given a 3-week mini-sabbatical from my leadership responsibilities at Oasis Church, Birmingham (I am a Church Pastor). During those 3 weeks I spent a handful of days in Ambleside in the Lake District. What beckoned was time alone with God, walking in the mountains, space from the usualness of life. What a privilege.
My wife Janey had wholeheartedly encouraged me to take this time away as she knew that time away with God always did me good. She sent me on my way with a healthy dose of enthusiasm that God would speak to me and I would come back refreshed.
I look back on those few days away with a tinge of sadness now. At the time, everything seemed wonderful and enjoyable for me — I took in some breath-taking scenery and enjoyed some fabulous walks — but back at home, Janey was really struggling with sleep deprivation and sickness. We knew Janey hadn’t quite been feeling herself for a while, but this time, she had begun to feel acutely unwell. Such was her desire to ensure I had the best time away I could, however, she hadn’t said anything. What a sacrifice.
Cancer
On returning home from The Lakes, I learnt of Janey’s poor health in more detail, and obviously felt immediate concern. How she’d been whilst I was away sounded like a completely new level of seriousness and pain. We knew we needed to more purposefully pursue answers as to what exactly was going on inside her.
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In November 2015, after a series of doctor’s appointments, specialist advice and various tests, Janey endured a sigmoidoscopy to try and ascertain if there was anything obviously wrong with her digestive system. The result of that procedure came on 23rd December 2015, a date forever etched into our memories. When the result came on that date, the unchartered journey of the next few months suddenly began, along with a new road of suffering for us that we had never trodden before.
What was result then? Bowel cancer. Stage 3. Bowel wall encroached. Partial obstruction. Tumour needing removal. Urgent operation immediately scheduled after Christmas. Yo ho ho.
The seriousness of her diagnosis saw us whisked through what seemed like every waiting room that existed in the Birmingham QE, jumping every queue with the clinical nurses waving invisible ‘She’s got cancer!’ trump cards at everyone who didn’t know why we were so ‘special’.
And in amidst the whirlwind of paperwork and plans, we were left with the question so many people carry when trouble comes along: ‘Is this really happening to us?’ We were suddenly thrust into the world of surreal…
A Cancer Story
I am going to endeavour to tell some of our cancer story of the past couple of years with as much honesty as I can muster, but at the same time demonstrate that through the relentless pressure and pain that suddenly came our way, our faith in God has continually made a difference.
Not that our faith has made the trouble go away — in fact if anything the pain has intensified over the past two years — but in the exploding mix of emotions we have experienced through what we have endured, we have become even more aware of how God himself does uniquely identify with us and comfort us in our suffering, and should we not have a God who knows what suffering is, we would have no God at all, and therefore no hope at all.
Our prayer is that perhaps our journey with trouble may help you on yours.
