Search for and focus on their positive qualities, and respind to those instead of their current words.

Almost everyone have some positive qualities. Finding them makes bearing their negatives easier.

Picture of angelic innocence, right there.

What’s your definition or idea of a “socialist economy”?

I think its important to specify here that “poor hygiene” includes putting soap and other stuff on or in the vagina - stuff that for many other body parts would be good hygiene.

Proper hygiene consists of clean underwear every day, mild unscented soap on mons pubis and outside the vulva (thighs, ass), and only water on the outer parts of the vulva (labia, clitoris etc), and absolutely nothing inside the vaginal canal. The vagina is constantly flushing itself out, and trying to clean it’s inside is only ruining it’s process of self-cleaning.

Infections are most common when unsuitable stuff is introduced to the sensitive environment: perfume, soap, poorly washed sex toys or body parts introducing bacteria; or choosing wrong material for condoms, sex toys or underwear. Not washing or changing underwear can also lead to strong smells, but is by far not the most common one reason for infections.

Cats dont tell you when something is wrong, so any change in behaviour, especially around their bathroom habits, is reason for a checkup at the vet.

I had a cat start peeing on the toilet, and have heard similar with cats starting to go in the shower drain, and turned out to have pretty severe kidney damage.

Hopefully it is nothing like that, but I didn’t realise something was wrong until it was too late and I don’t want the same for you and your cat.

I see no moral imperative to tell people about others financial status unless not knowing would directly harm them, like if they were about to lend money to someone known to not repay their debts.

People don’t have a right to know everything about everyone.

In this scenario my sons wealth would not negatively impact those relatives so I have no moral obligation to tell them. In fact, telling them even risk harming my sons relationships and physical and emotinal and social wellbeing, so it’s more immoral to tell my relatives about this.

And the solution is to not play things in public without headphones.

You know that’s the same cat… right? You’re just being funny?

Really depends on jurisdiction.

Where I’m from, a confession like that isn’t enough for a guilty verdict, there needs to be evidence backing it up. It can be enough to open an investigation and perhaps start prosecution, but anyone can confess to anything for any reason. If the confession includes details unknown to the public and impossible for an outsider to guess it would be more reliable than a general “I did it”-confession, but may still not be enough without additional evidence.

“I am the terror that flaps in the night.”

You’ve (re)named that cat “Ferdinand”, right?

Agree with a lot, and want to add: it doesn’t eat even a fraction of the time that doomscrolling reddit did. My feeds actually have an end and refreshing often does nothing, so I can put my phone away and try breaking the habit of picking it right back up again.

An issue I observe in kids is that children lack positive, physically available, male role models. Women can raise kids to be very tender and empathetic, but at some point most boys will start to model themselves after the men they see around them.

I guess the issue then exacerbate if they as adults are surrounded by only men who don’t check each others behaviour, but I have no eyes in men-only groups.

I would not volunteer to socialise men, as I do enough free emotional labour for the men in my life as it is. I might consider it if it was well paid and didn’t interfere with my actual job or hobbies. But honestly it sounds a bit scary, like the sort of event that would draw in angry hateful men who are looking for ways to be triggered by women speaking their mind, along with the ones open to learning, plus I abhor public speaking so it sounds like a terrible way to spend my precious time. Men need to be the ones modelling safe behaviour for boys, and men need to be the ones telling other men off when they behave like dogs and teach them how to control themselves.

I second the person saying dance lessons. There have been plenty of men in my group that have been shy or nervous or socially awkward, but everyone who follows dances with everyone who leads (which is usually but not exclusively a male/female split).

(Ps. Are you aware of asexuality? Might be something to look into for yourself)

Create shade wherever the sun shines, on the outside before the sun even hits the house. Focus especially on shading the glass and metall parts of your house. Make it angled and with some distance from the house so it still allows air flow. Mesh will shade less but allow more airflow and tarp will block pretty much all wind byt also pretty much all sun, so experiment with the tradeoff for different parts of the house like near windows or over the roof.

Where I live that’s enough to keep me reasonably, so thats all I know. Probably need to learn more with the more extreme weather we have now.

Taking a step back and really looking at who they really are, how they really behave, not hiw I imagine them to be or intentions I assume they have.

Either because they turn out to be pretty bland people I have been able to bulid fantasies around or because our issues was actually just their bad behaviour that I was able to imagine excuses for, or because I realise that we are not a good match (we want different things or tend to trigger each other in unhealthy ways) and a relationship between us would be more hurt than it’s worth.

Like you seeing her ableism and homophobia instead of just your fantasies around who she is and how your relationship would be.

No, I pretty clearly stated it was my opinion, not everyone elses.

People who post aren’t a monolith either, but have a wide range of experiences and worries. Do you even know if this is my only account?

Kind of depends on the situation. The compliment I’d want most is vastly different coming from a boss or coworker, or a child, my parents, a friend or a lover.

But in general something tied to reality works best, when I’ve done something recently that ties into the praise. That goes both for practical stuff like how creatively or well I did a work task or built a table, and more personal/interpersonal stuff like how kind or insightful I’ve been when listening and giving advice to a troubled friend.

Heres my opinion: Votes doesn’t matter, it merely inhibits conversation when we can express your reaction to a post with a click of a button instead of explaining our own thoughts on the matter.

Just post what you want to post and try to avoid looking at the number, or go over to an app or instance that doesn’t show votes, or allows you to select your own settings for votes, or only shows upvotes.

Dont worry, I have the brainpower to spare today and so I felt it’s worth it. It aligns with how I want to face the world, you know?

Having faith in people even for a moment gives me great cognitive harmony, so even when I lose, I win!

I don’t even think people need to be pushed, rather it’s natural that the minds of people who spend a lot of time together start to align. In what way they align is where leadership and peer pressureand propaganda plays a role… But I’d love to check it out. Do you have any specific material to start me off?

Btw, I really appreciate that your writing is more calm and focused on connecting and helping me understand you, rather than coming off as antagonistic, these past few messages. Thank you.