fatigued.
i am so fucking tired.
today, when i was writing this. i felt so tired.
in fact, in this very time, i was having my off-time work.
felt like the future was so frightening.
the more you work, you just lost lot of hours, you’re wasting time.
time is ticking, never stop.
sometimes i just wished that time could stop for a while, like us. having a break from tons tons of work and these whole burden.
it felt like giving up is the exit. suicidal thought knocking on your mind’s door.
ending this beat of the heart and entering the blackest moment that nobody knows what’s inside.
how’s that feel?
is it a dark place, will we see a light when we die? or actually the time just stop and there’s nothing there?
Get Klaus’s stories in your inbox
Join Medium for free to get updates from this writer.
will it be so painful?
or will it be so peaceful?
everything that we read in our bible about afterlife, is that true?
will we see our ancestor? will we see the blazing red and hot ocean that they called hell because we are the non-believer?
i wonder.
it feels very tired. did you feel that?
what’s the meaning of earning pile of cash, having everything and when we go home, our parent’s skin are getting wrinkled. the shade of the hair has changed. they’re going too tired when walking just few steps with us. when the weather is getting cold, they catch flu easily.
i feel it was so meaningless, working day and night.
well, i know, we all need money. all of our sweat keeps the electricity on, the heater warm the house, the availability of food at the table. yes, the money that we earn will pay the insurance, but that doesn’t keep the beloved ones stay with us for whole eternity.
i know it.
but, i can’t turn back time. a lot of things we missed and we couldn’t go back.
wished there will be a mutual solution in all burden that we carry everyday.
i just wished there won’t be a last time for everything in our life.
god, do you exist?
