Only delusion separates us from the same

Every single time, this plays in my brain***

*warning: potato quality

**still awesome

Did you receive the memo about the cover letters on the TPS reports?

I’m proud of you

I got a limo, ride in the back

TIL: jesus had a tiny penis

Grrr

I must be doing something right, because I have no idea.

So… She fucked him. Got it

Yes, Dad wants to tell you that the weatherman married his bf, which was news to Dad

Hahaha. I will take the under on that bet all day every day

👏

Why you wanna make me blush?

Oh sure, but in 6 years someone at a dinner party is gonna say “did you know there is no 6 in π” because they read my comment. At that moment my life’s purpose will be fulfilled.

Mischief managed.

There is no 6 in π

NGL

Kinda nice to see the millennials jump on the Gen x trauma train

I don’t know what the world may need, but I’m sure as hell that it starts with me. That’s wisdom I’ve laughed at

Do it

Dude … Shut the fuck up. Big egg gonna have a meeting

Eggshitification