Are the trans kids hot? What school do they go to?

Apparently they just let Trump talk and didn’t respond for a full minute and Trump was like “anyway you’re the best” and they still didn’t respond and Trump’s people ended the call.

The astronauts gave him the silent treatment. They could clearly hear him.

Impeaching Trump is just another Tuesday now. No meaning.

What inconsiderate bitch went out and bought the ice cream Jessie? Specifically to undermine me? And then tomorrow you can point to the empty pint and shame me. Yeah I’m done with your codependent bullshit, this is over!

OMG is this accurate.

I have quit all of my vices, from meth to cigarettes, and finally did away with weed.

Now I like who I am without weed - less anxiety, more in control, more ambitious, etc.

But I like being high almost more than that.

So I guess I’m going to buy a bag of weed once a month or something, get the best of both worlds? Or the worst IDK

Half the people I know, plus several books I’ve read lately, think that a small nuclear incident is required to get us back on track. We need to see devastation and horror to appreciate peace. Well, shit. Am I rooting for it? Kind of.

I’m just too tired and busy. I had 4 tabs of acid in my psychedelic cupboard. Someone gave me more, now I have 7. One of these years I’ll get away and trip my balls off in a forest, but it’s not this year.

There’s a valuable lesson here, and it’s to avoid using comic strips to identify the mushrooms you should eat to trip.

I organized our network’s printers into a print server, then wrote scripts to deploy them using a simple CLI tool. When printers break, I google it and order the part. Beyond that there is no more chaos, no more walking to workstations to troubleshoot. I am not a programmer, just an automation-focused sysadmin. Who ALWAYS gets assigned the bloody printers, because I’m too nice.

Lacking in novelty, our minds compress memory. Best explanation I’ve heard, and it’s seemed true… years where I am not doing very much, it’s just a few surface memories unless I dig. But years where I am busy as hell, it’s like being overrun with memories thinking of those times. As we get older, we experience less novelty. Living in a cube, living in a rut, yes that’ll make time slide by like nothing else. Avoid it at all costs.

Them slutty, overdramatic-as-shit Anne Rice vampires of course. Join me up in the Talamasca, hunt me down a gay bodychanging lover, all the things.

Astonishing how often I see someone start swatting at a paper wasp when it gets curious.

The fuck? It’s like a dog smelling you, but that dog has a stinger. You don’t swat at the fucking thing. You chill out and act real casual. Maybe pretend you didn’t even notice it. What wasp? I didn’t see any wasps. Now check my back so we can get our asses inside.

Yay came here for this. I was all excited to start a couple of beehives in my back yard. Then I discovered their lineage and what they’re doing to the native bees. Instead I realized I am hosting tons of huge ass bumblebees in my yard, and I’ll just let them be(e). Maybe get some of those bee houses for solitary bees instead.

He’s planning a speedrun of war crimes, see if he can set a record for multitude and variety at the same time

Consensual internal decapitation is such a transgressive turnon

Cracker Barrel is practically part of the MAGA family, but Trump still smacked the shit out of them for changing their logo, which cost them tens of millions reversing a rebrand. I’m sure this tweet even in jest made some folks at Chick Fil A wince in fear.

Anyone else find it weird when there’s a pic of a hot guy showing his wanger, but he’s obviously in his kids room, or their toys are all over the bathtub? Like, we can assume you’re a DILF without needing to know their actual favorite Marvel characters. Anyway. Amateur porn always a bit weird.

Breakfast at Tiffany’s did not paint Holly Golightly as a character to aspire to, yet generations of young women have emulated her since.

Now you’re asking the questions they don’t want you to ask

BIPOC, when seeing a cop, do not stop and think “Well I wonder if this is a good one or a bad one.” They just make a split second recognition and go with it - for their own safety. To them, cops are dangerous. So to me, cops are dangerous. If cops don’t want that reputation, well they need to make some big changes.