Co-Parenting?
Now, I'm dropping off the kids at a Target parking lot. Fair enough.
Sacrifice is a down payment.
Navigating this era in my life has been…. eye opening. Usher once said “Let it burn.’’ I've been a wildfire.
2 children. 5 and 1. They need us both. Valuing the children over ourselves, we never put them in the middle. No custody agreements, no visitation laws, I see them when I want and vice versa.
I asked her for a divorce in March of ’25. I held out one year thinking we would reconcile. Tough luck. A divorced dad, 40 yrs old, looking into the abyss. At your lowest moment, your actions decide, you.
“Sleep is for the peaceful.” Peace is a lie.
Sleep is a product with no price tag. Have you ever waken up at 3am staring at the ceiling? That's a regular for me. My mind doesn't shut off, constant images and memories replay in my subconscious, which makes it tough to rest. Combine that with having to prepare 2 kids for my passing. Am i putting too much on my plate as a teacher/dad? No, that's in the description.
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Many nights I drink myself to sleep. Thinking……. If I would've said yes instead of no. Lets do it, rather than, I’ll think about it. Maybe, maybe not. She wasn’t mine, it was my turn. No more hard feelings, no more anger, and resentment. I have another 40 years on this earth and If I spend them dwelling the past, then strike me down, now.
Nights get lonely.
The hardest part is sleeping alone in the house we shared. She picked it out. Decor, furniture, paint, appliances, it’s all her. I see ‘Her” everyday. But, we have children to raise so, I stick my chin up, shoulders back and pretend I run the world.
She is a treasure.
I’ve heard the horrible custody stories, baby mama drama, courtroom crash outs, and 55% child support…… DAMN. I was lucky to marry a woman who valued fathers. Our agreement was pretty easy? We both want the best for our children and just because we didn’t work doesn’t mean the kids have to be collateral. Thank you, Jo. Incredible mother.
Tag Team.
If you’ve watched wrestling in your lifetime, you know, Co-Parenting is very similar to a tag team match. Understanding your partner, how they think, how they react, when to tag in and when to cause a diversion. I‘ll always love my ex-wife. We’ve journeyed across the U.S. looking for adventure. I mean, how many couples would load up the car, and move to a foreign city with no family, friends or a place to sleep. We did, and I’m grateful she chose me. And, I’m grateful for the divorce….. Crazy? Because it made me a better man.
I’ve never cried more in my life, it’s almost on command.
I see things from a pain perspective. I’ve been through the fire and made it out the other end. I wake up with a particular “freedom”. An understanding that “any day” can be your last.
