Happiness
The title is quite evident: happiness.
I say it over and over again — the me that began the year isn’t here anymore. It’s totally someone new.
Happier. Bubbly, actually. More calm.
And I love it.
And guess what? We cut our hair.
Jesus Christ! Never in my 26 years of life did I ever think I would cut my hair someday. Well, boom!!! I cut it, and I love it even more.
I love this version of me.
Next on my agenda is to resign.
No Plan B well executed yet. Funny, right? 😂 Small small, you cut your hair and suddenly you feel brand new, and now you want to resign.
I love it for you, Persis.
Anyway, I just want to document my life. To always remember. To have something to come back to one day when I get to read the letters I wrote to myself. I hope when I read this, I beam.
I hope I remember how life made sense.
How life didn’t necessarily throw me off the ditch.
I know the good and bad days will always exist, and that’s okay. I loved the good days, and when the bad ones came, I faced them. I went through them. I didn’t die.
And then the good came again.
I hope I carry this same mindset with me — that God still has, always had, and will always have my back. Because this far, it has been Him who carried me through.
The grace that sustained me.
And yes, here’s to brighter days and, hopefully, a beautiful next update.
By the way, Ken is getting married next Friday.
And it’s okay.
I’m not sad.
I’m okay.
Still in disbelief that life became this way, but I’m okay.
I hope I remember this when I get to another part of my life that requires faith, patience, and trust. I hope I remember that there was once a season like this, a season I never imagined I would get through — and somehow, we made it out better.
I cut my hair with no sentimental feelings attached to it. But now, I think maybe I cut it for a newer life.
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A better version.
A happier me.
A calmer and more balanced mind.
Better things have come, and better things will come.
So, to me, I WRITE this to tell you:
You are worth everything beautiful.
You have time.
You will meet the right people. You will meet people who will make your life beautiful and give it even more meaning than you imagined.
So bet on yourself again.
Not just one more time.
Over and over again.
I don’t know when it will all happen, but one day, it will all be worth it.
The business.
The house you want to build for your parents.
The car you want to drive.
The relationship you desire — with God and with the person you will one day call your spouse.
The nations you want to travel to.
One day.
Just as today happened, what makes you doubt that the things you desire won’t, in their own way, desire you too?
So yes, Persis.
We are worth everything beautiful.
And I hope you never forget it.
Here’s to happiness.
Here’s to becoming.
Here’s to the girl who cut her hair and somehow found a little more of herself in the process.
I love you, girl.
