THE TROLL
HIGHER FENCES MAKE BETTER NEIGHBORS
The first time I noticed Davy at all, he was chopping a tree down, not knowing where he should stand or how it would fall.
He and his wife tied a rope up high, and were pulling the tree together, so they both could die. Some other neighbors also watched, but thankfully their attempt to unalive was botched.
After that, we built a new fence, and he didn’t share in the expense. It just seemed right that the entire new fence cost should be split, but he was thoroughly annoyed that I even mentioned it. He became more appalled when we built it extra tall.
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We now call him the tall troll, as he will sometimes spy through a high fence knothole. I think it makes him even madder. He probably stands on a step ladder.
All his ivy vines and blackberries, creeping over top, always need to be cropped. It’s a jungle back there, with vines everywhere.
He waits until the grass is too tall before he starts thinking of cutting it at all. The blades are set much lower on his sputtering and gasping old lawn mower. Rocks are hurled and dirt dust swirls.
Don’t get me started on how he uses his extremely powerful leaf blower. He considers himself an expert garden grower, but it looks like he waters with a large flamethrower.
Over our back fence, that’s Davy’s private domain.
To say the least, he’s an awful pain.
© 2024 Peter W. Collier
