2025 in Paraphrasing
I came, I saw, I ran away…
I know there is a stark difference between my videos and my writing. My easy-to-pull-out laugh gives the impression that I am happy, and my detailed mind shares the total opposite. It seems my recaps are getting sadder, and I am getting more conflicted about my life and living, when, mind you, I also believe I have no worries or problems like that.
I worry there might be no balance for me between being in my head and living; it feels harder with every year I try to recap. This year I did a lot of things alone, according to the videos I made, but when I look back on the year, I see a lot more of the things I did with people. Work was also fun.
I crossed over at the Yabs, with a crossover service streaming on the TV while I worked my way into making a content calendar for one of the brands I worked with. Around 1 a.m. or 2 a.m., I watched fireworks while playing Call of Duty, and I got whooped in a few games. I should have seen how symbolic that was.
Anyway, I’ll not be writing a letter this year. I’m saving it for next year, betting on myself that I will have something newsletter-worthy to speak on. So, welcome to my 2025 in some paragraphs and paraphrasing.
Actually, I locked in with work. Maybe not as great as I should have, but I did. I rose to most challenges and did amebo over some. My role at work got niched. Two videos I scripted for Kommunity Flex made their way to adsoftheworld.com. I worked with a skincare brand for the first time as a freelancer, finally finished setting up my Upwork profile, had my first speaking engagement on how to have structure as a creative (2023 me would be so proud), executed content distribution and marketing for Kommunity Flex Content Week, properly wrote copies and scripts for a food brand, went on set, and got more versed with quick thinking. Posted on LinkedIn every week — almost 165 posts. Got my income a little bump (nothing too fancy, because the best money is from my siblings). Got positive reviews from work and everyone I was privileged to work with. I also went for Moonshot, my first official tech conference, and it was so much fun. I diversified a lot and figured out ways to utilize and split my skills without getting tired, while ensuring the quality of my work stayed up to par.
In my DIY corner, I did a lot of things — used my November/December to learn how to do my makeup, officially a baddie apprentice. Learned how to make beaded bags — I’ll finish one in Q1 for fun. I made a cute traditional bead set, which I’m yet to wear anywhere. I — oh? I didn’t do so much here? Most importantly, I learned how to make lip gloss. This makes so much sense if you know me because I love wearing glosses. So yes, I’ll be building this in public next year.
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Communication (friends and family) — I could have responded to a lot more messages in the group chat, but I’m lazy, so I reacted more. Blame WhatsApp for this. I have a theory that because I have to write a lot for work, I am slowly becoming a lazy texter. Call me next year. Contrary to my face, I quite enjoy calls, especially video calls on days I look cute. Oh, my siblings and I started and stopped game nights this year, but it was fun, and I hope we pick it up again. As the year progressed, I don’t think I hung out with my friends a lot; I spent a lot of time by myself and sleeping. But I enjoyed every second I got to hang out, and I met a few people for the first time in a long time too.
Giving this the paragraph it deserves: I had the best birthday. Every year, I have a better birthday than the last, and this was no exception. I felt very loved and deserving of cakes, in spite of thoughts I had.
Mental health is quite short, but the most important thing is that I tasted therapy, and I loved it. I paid more attention to my emotions, and I am learning to sit with my feelings and calm myself. Earlier in the year, I stumbled upon a video that said just because your feelings seem urgent doesn’t mean they are; sit with them. I am learning to, and I must confess it is hard. I also felt tired a lot this year. I fear I might be becoming emotionally unavailable or avoidant a bit, but time will tell.
I considered cutting people off a million times and said it, but when it was said back to me, I realized I might need to pay more attention to my word selection.
I don’t believe I wrote a lot of long notes to people this year, and I am slowly losing the ability to. It started very silly, but writing this has made me acknowledge that I might be losing my ability to communicate my feelings with words, and maybe it is because I am losing my feelings.
If you know me, you know how significant that is, because I am known to be a cutie who writes long emotional notes. I hope? Well, I doubt anyone will remember that person used to exist if I keep going at this rate.
I must confess: I am a bit jealous of people who list out their year in affiliation with big names. It makes me want to do more with myself.
Bottom line is, I intend to be greedy in 2026. I want more in every way. For all I x2’d in 2025, I want to x100. I want to dip my hand into the honey jar and just leave it there. Also, the things my hand can’t reach, I have 6-inch heels to reduce the proximity now. My capacity for more will be tested, and I will triumph. It’s starting to read like a prayer list, so I’ll make it simple: in 2026, I’ll live in my definition of everything I want.
