What Never Changed
Between then and now, their adoration for each other never changed.
Tokuno Yushi and Choi Jiwoo had a long trainee period. They met when they were very young, just kids chasing their dreams of becoming stars. Day by day, month by month, year by year, they spent their time in the practice room. Along the way, they watched some of their friends debut, while others left their lives as trainees. Although there were so many uncertainties about their future, they kept going. They believed their time to shine would come.
Many times, they were in the same class and had evaluations at the same time, which helped them get to know each other better. They were shy at first, but over time, they realized how many things they had in common — the food, the songs, the habits, and the jokes. They thought this was what mattered most, the reason they seemed to share the same brain cells and connect so naturally.
Every time they met during Japanese or Korean classes, they quietly gazed at each other, exchanging small smiles unnoticed by anyone else in the study room. In their free time, they met in secret, strolling along the Hangang River — breathing in the fresh air, walking side by side, and sharing a single earphone to listen to the playlist they had built together. They didn’t talk much — only their presence, and unsteady heartbeat they both felt.
Having been through the same trainee period meant the same struggles and feelings. They knew they shouldn’t be falling for each other. That hadn’t been their goal from the beginning, when they decided to become trainees. They knew that if they wanted to be idols, they weren’t supposed to fall in love and being in a relationship. Even though they were still trainees, they were expected to understand the unwritten rules — rules meant to prevent things from backfiring when they eventually debuted. But still, they were young, and they were human beings. Loving someone and being in a relationship weren’t a sin, right?
Even after Yushi had announced that he would debut in the last unit of NCT, he continued to support Jiwoo wholeheartedly. Every time she told him about a private showcase their agency would hold, he always went there. He would watch her performances from afar, and she could always spot him easily, even when he wore a mask and a cap. He was also the reason she kept chasing her dream. When his pre-debut activities began, they no longer had much time to meet. Still, he promised that he would stay in touch, and every time he returned to South Korea, he would meet her — no matter what.
Unfortunately, being an idol also meant sacrificing their personal lives. It wasn’t easy to maintain a secret relationship. It was hard for them to find time to be together, especially when Jiwoo finally debuted a year after Yushi. Of course, he was happy and relieved to hear the news. But both of them were constantly busy because of their packed schedules. Sometimes, they really wanted to rebel against their agency — but no, they were still rookies, and that was impossible.
With less time to meet, they stayed in touch through kakao talk. But still, it wasn’t the same. What they wanted was to meet face to face — to lean on each other, hold hands while watching a movie, and talk about random things all day long. That was all they wanted. It felt suffocating every time they realized they couldn’t do those things anymore.
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Their relationship was still a secret from their fans. But by then, the people they worked with already knew that what Yushi and Jiwoo shared was no longer just a senior-junior relationship. So whenever their groups had schedules at the same show, their managers and staff would warn them — especially Yushi — to be careful, because every move they made was being watched by fansites.
But Yushi was still the same old. When it came to Jiwoo, he couldn’t suppress his feelings. He couldn’t control his adoration for her. Like that night at the MMA, when she performed a solo stage, dancing like a professional ballerina, dressed beautifully like a white swan princess. How could he possibly hide how proud he was of her?
His smile spread wide, his eyes sparkling as he watched her on the monitor while he waited backstage, preparing and waiting for his turn. He should have been nervous — his group was about to perform shortly after her group. But no, he wasn’t nervous at all. Watching his girlfriend do her job so well made him want to do his part just as well. He didn’t want to embarrass Jiwoo by being that kind of boyfriend who didn’t try hard enough. He wanted her to be proud of him, too.
As Yushi had hoped, of course, Jiwoo was proud of him. Even though his group’s stage felt emptier — without backdancers and confetti like her group’s performance — she could see and hear how much effort he put into every moment on stage. She smiled so brightly while watching his performance on the monitor as her group took a short break after their stage. Her pounding heartbeat every time the screen showed his face was proof that she truly treasured him. Her fellow group members even teased her for being too focused on her boyfriend’s performance. She also couldn’t hide how deeply she adored him.
That night meant everything to them. Both groups claimed two trophies, watched their role models perform live at such a prestigious award show, and — most importantly — knew that they were in the same venue, stealing glances across the crowd like they had done since their trainee days. They both wished that, at the very least, they could exchange a brief greeting after the award show ended.
In moments like this, even something that small felt incredibly precious. They knew their time together was short. Yushi had to return to Japan after that day, and once again, they wouldn’t be able to spend time alone — just the two of them. As the award show ended, he couldn’t help but look for his girlfriend, even while he was still on stage. He wanted to see her for as long as he could, but he had be careful — there were so many fans watching his every move. When his group finally left the stage, a staff called them over to gather. Three young groups from SM Entertainment were asked to take a photo together.
That’s when Yushi saw Jiwoo clearly. She walked towards him, closing the distance between them. He couldn’t hide his excitement. His heart raced the moment he saw how beautiful his girlfriend looked. The makeup, the hairdo, the swan-feather clips adorning both sides of her hair — gorgeous. So gorgeous, so breathtaking. He was mesmerized. He couldn’t take his eyes off of her until his leader called him out.
A smile tugged at his lips when his girlfriend smiled at him first and offered a brief greeting. Their gazes locked for a moment. No words were exchanged, yet they both knew — they missed each other. They longed for one another. He managed to utter a single word of congratulations, which sounded oddly cute to her, causing her to smile warmly. He smiled back, awkward and flustered.
When the group photo session began, Yushi decided to stand next to Jiwoo. However, his leader warned him again, leaving him no choice but to stand slightly in front of her. He crouched low so she remained visible to the camera. He was unwilling to put any distance between them. Just as Yushi couldn’t hold back his happy smile over something so small, neither could Jiwoo.
— December 24, 2025.
