tranquility

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tranquility
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Or when you burp so loud your heart attack goes away.


Sometimes I want to do that thing they do to bloated cows.

Hate to say it, but you don’t have a rumen.

You don’t know me ! 😤

Hi, yes, I am real man. Want to go skateboards?





i have two pieces of advice. the first is that you get really good resonance off of the toilet bowl. it’s echoey.
second, if you aren’t near a toilet or just want to cut loose in private, this pose helps:

*Does downward dog against the toilet bowl and loudly fire-sprinklers shit all over the bathroom and self*

i really shouldn’t have had that four bean burrito. three beans is enough for me,

I’m imagining something like Pee-Wee eating an m&m. “Why don’t you take a picture, it’ll last longer.”





It was just the wind


I have chronic breathing issues and so I have a nice air cleaner right next to my side of the bed. I also have a lot of gas. I often rip them so good the air filter almost immediately kicks from low to high. My wife is not as amused by it as I am.



and poop comes instead




Sometimes, you need to adjust your dairy intake. That’s what helped me.

You can’t know the greatest pleasures without a little sacrifice.

as the great arctic explorer Archibald Witwiki often said

No sacrifice, no victory!




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