Gordon Calhoun

When I fantasized about the country being overrun by ghouls, I pictured something more comforting, like World War Z or Shaun of the Dead or even Zombieland. But this…this is a sick and twisted kind of hell. Even worse than Walking Dead.

Maybe if all the birds teamed up to go apeshit on people, they might be able to stop things. Hitchcock and du Maurier were on to something…

The world isn’t going to end. It’ll stay right here, 93,000,000 miles away from the sun. Whether humans remain on it or perish due to famine/plague/disease, well, no one but (many, but apparently not all) humans cares, least of all the earth. Denying a bullet is flying at your face despite seeing the flash won’t stop it from completing its trajectory (metaphor).

Clutch those pearls, assholes. Don’t worry, your base is too stupid to cast blame on you. I’m sure your war-criming, pedophile-enabling, constitution-hating ilk will do just fine.

I certainly won’t be voting for anything remotely resembling GOP/MAGA, but I know plenty of people who will because they apparently can’t learn what would actually be good for them. Only the “undecideds” can really make the decision…Hopefully they bother to cast enough intelligent votes.

In Snow Crash, dentatas seemed like one of the more effective deterrents.

If only there were some way to provide a society where women felt safe, secure, and comfortable to willingly bring in and care for new life. If only.

JFC. A pornography collection of enormous children. What a suck fuck.

Now that she’s not in his inner circle anymore, I wonder if she can try to go back to looking like a normal person and not one of the glossed-over pro-Voldemort ministry of magic turds in Harry Potter or shiny fake mean robots in Robots.

She’s still evil, but I’m sick of all women in high positions of authority in this government regime having to adopt pornstar-grade levels of makeup to appease Jaba the Trump’s personal taste.

“Evacuate” was the term they used in Wannsee.

Also crushed whatever goodwill I had toward Tim Urban as a balanced and neutral intellectual in pursuit of a better world through education and truth. Just another paid hack sucking the musky dick.

Corrosion to the rescue! Don’t worry UnderpantsWeevil, Entropy, the one and every thing to which you are immune, will provide eventual salvation.

She’s hot and it’s pro-Trump. Why should they care if it’s real or not if it tickles their…confirmation bias?

…lesser alien-looking one…

Mutant. They prefer to be called mutants.

“What country before ever existed a century and half without a rebellion? And what country can preserve its liberties if their rulers are not warned from time to time that their people preserve the spirit of resistance? Let them take arms. The remedy is to set them right as to facts, pardon and pacify them. What signify a few lives lost in a century or two? The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. It is its natural manure.”

Would be great to see them all put their bodies where their mouths are and volunteer to go fight it for him.

I really like how this joke slightly renews itself every year.

Triple dog dare you to stick your tongue on it.

Luckers and soosers.