oh yeah, girl! <3

hang in there! you got this. :3

eggsaggtly :3

ok, so i’ll give it some time and a bit more practice. :) thanks for sharing your story

… we did have quite a bit of experience with phonology and linguistics in general, which was definitely a HUGE help.

oh yeah i did too. unfortunately i soon realised that all my focus in phonetics was about consonants. (i am really good at those!) so my knowledge about vowels could be better and thus more helpfull. :/

we found that when speaking english it sounded better in a recording than it did when we were speaking out loud, but in german language it is the opposite.

i made a similar observation. in those laguages i do not use often in everyday life (which includes my native language) it is easier to apply the new voice. maybe in part, bc i don’t hear the nuances or don’t have much comparison? for sure it is also that i am not that stuck in my habits, when speaking those. in languages i am not remotely fluent, i have to much else to think about, and can’t ‘do a voice’ yet.

we still do a lot of “1, 2, 3” etc. prior to speaking, just to feel on the safe side.

you do that in prep for a meeting or giving a talk? or like also in between shops? i haven’t really thought about including small preparation units in my day

thank you for sharing!

i knowwwwa. … trying to sing makes me cry rather quickly. my primary school had a choir in which all kids sang. i did not. i had a ‘special class’ with like 5 others, where we clapped with these music stick thingies. i did learn early to please stop singing.

it sounds super logical, that that would be a good training. atm i just recite poems in the fem voice and try to not sound high while doing so … hm.

we will all nail this somehow. :) i hope …

it is really super helpfull to have someone correct you immediately. my guy is really strict. when it’s falsetto time, it is falsetto all the time, even in the small syllables no one cares about. this is a topic i could never diy, i feel like. because i don’t hear if i do the practices right, i only start to get a feel for what to do, through his instructions.

i wish you a lot of strength! 💖

ich wünsche dir eine gute zeit. :)

wheeeeeeee! i’m glad for you. this is a very exciting moment. i’ll give you my two pennies, do as you wish with them: if possible, and you are ready for it search for local support groups. for me it was very important to semi-regularly meet those other trans people, and actually see their faces. online discourse is helpfull too, but knowing there are other trans people in town you can connect with (more or less) was a “i am not alone” moment. (i got dragged there by a trans friend, i came out to first, so technically i already knew, but … there were even more of us! 🤩)

enjoy your day. and go forward in your pace. you will find even more joy. :3

ahhhh this only adds to the list of solutions to a problem i am unsure about. ;)

Especially when you see constant memes celebrating bottom surgery. I doubt that it would trick someone who would otherwise be actively against the idea into someone who thinks they want it, but it certainly can nudge feelings a little.

yeah. also there is a societal pressure to be ‘unambiguous’ i.e. binary. so if it is possible, to have a certain surgery, it becomes an unspoken imperative. i myself try to very carefully navigate all these currents. i fear i wouldn’t find home otherwise. and it is ok to sit on a stone for seven years (or so) untill you find out what you really want and only then sail on.

sure we’d love to accelerate this finding-out-process. but sometimes poseidon is gonna be poseidon. :/

(this whole oddyssee thing is getting to far (off). i’ll stop rn.)

the perceived usefullness of my configuration has for sure and rapidly gone down through hrt (4+ month now). but it also started at a low level. i had come to understand a lot of my past behaviour as some kind of dysphoria before hrt. but still i am unsure if i want surgery. my dysphoria has never shown itself in me actively disliking my parts. it is just nothing i want others to interact with. i think it’d be rather boring if they did.

so yeah i guess at least your first and second point might be factors. esp. my sex drive did change through E. it got even more of a whole body thing, i wasn’t ever fixated on genital interaction, but still i feel it drifting away from that. the ability to top became even less of an priority for me. as for your 3rd one: be assured, i know a lot of girls that do not go for surgery. i maybe won’t either. i am still trying to form a solid opinion in therapy, bc i can’t tell how i feel abt any of this. but do whatever you need. qnd only that. :)

i think the “good ally” trope is nice and even usefull in that it might make us safer to have more and better alllies. but i take what i get. i won’t wait for the perfect allies only.

finally baggy pants! i hatet the ‘regular’ ones that where just a little less skinny.

get a list of the effects of T. ask yourself: " do i want those effects?" you already expirience them, i guess. but do you like what it does to you in the grand view? i struggeled bc breasts weren’t on my wishlist but a certain strength was … it is abt the majority here. by now, breasts are very much on my wishlist; denial yk …

i had a rather bad relationship with my parents. not catastrophic, but not good for sure. being trans only showed me this bigger problem once again. i do not talk to the father atm and avoid the mother.

what i still do is sending them pictures of me via group chat when i feel great. i want them to see their daughter. they either do not react to it at all, or very distanced (like “that looks different.”). besides that i do not share anything. they would only turn anything agsinst me.

so. i do not deal with that situation in a very grown up way. or maybe i am just done? i learned years ago, that i shouldn’t expect anything from them. your case seems different in that they were caring an suddenly stopped? it must be a schock to suddenly watch your parents shift and let you down. even if you somewhat expected this, seeing it play out in front of you is a very sad moment. please keep walking. your little family sounds awesome! :)

oh nein. mein biodiesel!

you have done great! i am a little emotional right now and try not to cry in public. i’m glad you got this so fast.:)))

lot has been said. deutsche christen werent catholics. but they sound familiar, these days.

ich komme ja eher aus der baudelair-ecke, aber ich widerspreche seinem fazit.