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FunTranscript
00:00Networking is the stupidest thing ever.
00:05No amount of networking has ever made anyone's career
00:08and no amount of lack of networking has ever destroyed anyone's career.
00:11You do good work, you will shine.
00:13You don't do good work, you eventually won't shine.
00:18At one point I was saying, you know what,
00:19why am I unnecessarily forcing myself to do things
00:23that I feel so uncomfortable doing?
00:26That has always been the case that my guards will immediately go up
00:29and I see that someone is trying to put two women in a competitive space.
00:33I've always been a big girl's girl.
00:35I have always, right since I was a kid till now and will forever be lifelong,
00:41I'll always look out for, I'm also a big believer and I never say things
00:45behind people's backs that I wouldn't say to their faces.
00:49Pit women against each other, where they come and they compliment you
00:53while putting another woman down saying,
00:55You look so much better than her.
00:56Oh yeah, you were looking so nice, she was not looking nice.
00:58I'm like, why?
01:00You couldn't just come and tell me that I was looking nice.
01:02What was the need?
01:04Did you think I was going to feel even better?
01:07Because you were like, oh, she was not looking good and I was,
01:09I don't need someone to be put down for me to feel high up.
01:12Yeah.
01:13A big Bollywood fan, the way people are, you know, growing up like crazy.
01:17But then I saw Krish and I think that was like a childhood defining moment for me.
01:24Because it established two of my most favourite actors for me.
01:27I remember after that I was obsessed with Priyanka Chopra and Hrithik Roshan.
01:30These were like my two.
01:31I feel like that was when I really started enjoying the industry.
01:34The industry was not really a part of conversations when I was growing up at all.
01:40My mother had stopped being an actor by the time I was born.
01:42Like my mother is the least filmy person you'll ever meet.
01:45Like she has no clue what goes on in the industry, what's happening most of the time.
01:49I'm explaining things to her and I'm like, mama, you need to know this.
01:53I have always been someone that's made my own choices.
01:56Because for me, I need to know that my failures were my own fault and my successes were my own doing.
02:01You know, I want to take full credit for my successes and I want to take full credit for any failures.
02:15Hello everybody, I'm Rudrani and welcome to Spotlight Sessions podcast.
02:20Today, my guest is so special, so talented and so much fun.
02:25Of course, she has her family in the industry, but she has always been so focused on creating her own path and her own identity.
02:33Like I said, so much fun, so full of life.
02:36The beautiful Alaya. Thank you for doing this.
02:38Thanks for such a sweet introduction, Rudrani. I love it.
02:41Every word is true.
02:43Sitting in Alaya's beautiful house, we're doing this podcast.
02:46Thank you for welcoming us to your house so warmly.
02:49And she means warmly with a pun because it's extremely hot.
02:52The ACs are not cooling properly today.
02:55In this industry, when you come in, especially from a film family, there are so many judgments.
03:02There are so many viewpoints about who you are, how you got it.
03:06But I think from the day one of you doing promotions, I think people have seen that you genuinely are,
03:12not just self-aware, not just about your privilege.
03:16I feel like, but you are also very determined that, sure, this is a part of who I am, but I'm so much more.
03:23And I think you've seen that support grow for you very steadily throughout.
03:28Alaya, today, with so many years now, since your debut, how do you feel about navigating through all of that and reaching where you have today?
03:37You know, honestly, I don't think anyone can really prepare you for what the journey is like in this industry.
03:44Because it's constantly changing.
03:47And I feel like it's, you have to just be on the ball constantly.
03:53You have to be ready to learn, ready to change, ready to adjust, ready to, you know, question beliefs that you had maybe even just last month.
04:00You know, I feel like I've learned and grown so much, not just as an actor, but as a human being, as a person, as someone to work with.
04:09As you know, I feel like when I look back at my journey in this industry, I feel like I'm just beginning.
04:16Because I feel like I'm constantly having new realizations and new moments.
04:20And so last year, I sort of had this moment where I was like, I just felt like I wasn't doing things that truly made me happy.
04:31And I think I decided that I wanted to just change course.
04:38Of course. And so since last year, and all through this year, I've been shooting projects that are actually very different than the choices I've made earlier, which is exciting because it helps me grow as an actor and as a performer.
04:51And it's also really exciting because it's, yeah, I feel like a newbie all over again.
04:57And I'm excited for it. And when I look back at the fact that like, I realized that I debuted in 2020, which is crazy, it blows my mind, because I also lost three of those years in the pandemic.
05:08There was a three year gap between Jawani Jahneman, my first film and Freddie, which was my second film.
05:13And so, yeah, I'm excited for what's to come. I feel like I feel like I'm just getting started. Honestly, I feel like I've got like this big second wind now. And I'm ready to attack.
05:28You know, it's very interesting. You said that I, I think I have taken a course a little different now, because I'm trying to make things different.
05:37I feel like you also come from a family where, you know, you have had, of course, you know, different people, you've had art and culture, so seeped into your growing up days, you know, with, of course, you know, Shruti Mameham and Kabir sir.
05:53But you also have seen that the celebration of commercial films through your mother's work and all of that.
05:59Actually, if I'm being really honest, growing up, we didn't really talk about films. The industry was not really a part of conversations when I was growing up at all. My mother had stopped being an actor by the time I was born.
06:12And like my mother is the least filmy person you will ever meet. Like she has no clue what goes on in the industry. What's happening most of the time I'm explaining things to her and I'm like, Mama, you need to know this.
06:24So, my nana, of course, since I've become an actor, me and my nana have had lots of conversations about films and the industry and stuff like that. But prior to me joining the industry, I don't think my nana ever, we never really spoke about films before that.
06:39So, honestly, I figured out this industry once I joined the industry. I didn't really come in prepared. I came in prepared as an actor, but I didn't come in. So, I had done all my diction training, my dance training, my acting training. I had done all those other things.
06:57I had come prepared as an actor, but I had come very unprepared as a part of the industry. So, if you see my earlier interviews, like, you know, you see, I'm not like, I look like a baby, my grooming is little off. I have like baby hair sticking out from here. I'm wearing clothes sometimes that don't necessarily work on my body type.
07:16I'm, you know, there are all these random little things that I'm so naively and sweetly clueless about. And through the course of me being a part of this industry, I've learned a lot. And then, of course, there was the pandemic that happened, which changed the industry for everyone, like the entire.
07:36So, by the time I got the hang of the industry and I understood it a little bit, the whole format of the industry changed because post pandemic and pre pandemic, I think everyone knows that the way films are made and the types of films that are made have been entirely different. So, then it was like a second education to someone that was. So, imagine you've just entered school. You've just gone from primary school to middle school.
07:58And the entire curriculum has changed. And everyone that's in high school and has graduated, they're figuring it out. And you who's barely graduated from primary school is now having to figure out the whole system all over again, you know.
08:12So, it was a little confusing and daunting. But luckily, I've always had a really wonderful group of people to sort of guide me through this, whether it's my agency or, you know, just the general people I've worked with.
08:22I've been very fortunate that I've been surrounded by really, truly good people and people that have always empowered me to make my own decisions.
08:30No one's ever told me this is what we're going to do and this is how it is.
08:34No one ever took advantage of the fact that I didn't know too much.
08:38Everyone always made it a point to teach me and then help me make my own informed decision, which I love, which is why I'm really loyal to the people I've worked with and that have seen me through the years, you know.
08:49And I don't forget that because I think it's really important.
08:51Everything was well and good and I have always been someone that's made my own choices.
08:56Because for me, I need to know that my failures were my own fault and my successes were my own doing.
09:01You know, I want to take full credit for my successes and I want to take full credit for any failures.
09:06I don't want to have to ever point fingers or give anyone credit that is mine, you know.
09:10So, for me, that's always been important.
09:13And so, I've made some great choices over the years and I've made some not so great choices over the years.
09:18And I've learned equally from both.
09:21And it's taking those learnings now.
09:27Actually, 2024 was a year where I really reflected on all of that a lot.
09:30I sat and I remember it was actually exactly in October of 2024 that I made, so exactly one year ago, where I made a humongous decision.
09:40And post that, I have, I don't know, I've just like changed course.
09:46And right now, it's not, right now, I can just say it in theory because next year is, I guess, when you'll see the sort of course switch.
09:55There's a lot of foundation that has been laid this year, which is why I was pretty actually low-key this year compared to most years.
10:01I've actually been pretty low-key.
10:02I've done, you know, my own thing.
10:03I've barely done any interviews.
10:05I've barely done any appearances also this year.
10:07I've had no films out this year.
10:10So, I've had a very low-key year.
10:12But this year has been actually one of the most transformative years of my life because I've laid the foundation for the next decade of my life.
10:18But I think the foundation has already started, no?
10:21I mean, the world, I think, can see a foundation already with one of the announcements being Storm with HRX Films and Hrithik and producing it and with Parvati and you.
10:32Yes, of course.
10:32That's a powerhouse of talent that I saw.
10:36The picture was just released.
10:37You all posted on it.
10:38Yeah, we had a cast and crew.
10:40Some of my favorite women in that screen, all fantastic actors.
10:43Tell me, so, I'm assuming that is a part of the foundation that you talk about.
10:47Storm is definitely a big part of the sort of pivot I've made in a certain way because I feel like for me, what is of utmost priority now is choosing scripts that I truly believe in and working with people that I truly like.
11:02I think that's so important because I feel like if you work on scripts that you genuinely really enjoy and you work with people that make working feel like a pleasure.
11:14And like a collaborative, creative, wonderful process, which is what it's supposed to be, you know, it's a, as actors, you're so vulnerable in so many moments, you know, we're basically giving yourself to a set and to then later the audience.
11:29And I mean, to do it effectively, you need to let go of all your guards, you know, you need to be able to let go and to be able to let go in a situation that you don't feel comfortable or safe in or protected in or, you know, nurtured in is much harder, you know.
11:46So, I think working with good people helps you as an actor also because you just have an environment that's so much more conducive to good work.
11:55A hundred percent. So, let's talk about the names you're associating with. Parvati, Hrithik, you know, it must be a joy.
12:02Koss, Sabha, Shishti, Rama.
12:03Sabha, Shishti.
12:04Yeah, all of them just incredible actors.
12:07Can you tell me how it kind of made your experience so much more fun?
12:09I mean, so we haven't started shooting yet. We've just done, just, yeah, we haven't started shooting yet.
12:18But everyone's really lovely. Everyone has really great energy. Everyone is, they're all people that I'm extremely excited to be collaborating with and working with.
12:28And I'm really looking forward to the whole process. I think it's going to be great fun.
12:32I remember you always said you've been a Hrithik fan.
12:34Yes, who hasn't?
12:36And this, I think, kind of puts on a very inspirational journey that he's had as well, right, in the industry.
12:41Incredibly. Even before I was a Bollywood person, like I was never really a big Bollywood fan, the way people are, you know, growing up like crazy.
12:52But then I saw Krish. And I think that was like a childhood-defining moment for me.
12:58Because it established two of my most favorite actors for me. I remember after that, I was obsessed with Priyanka Chopra and Hrithik Roshan.
13:04These were like my two, I don't know, they were like, I feel like that was when I really started enjoying the industry.
13:13I know most people have their entry into, you know, being Bollywood buffs much earlier.
13:19Mine, honestly, if I'm being very honest, it started there.
13:21That's when I was like, whoa, this is really cool.
13:25And these people are, so yeah, Krish was my initiation into Bollywood in a big way.
13:33And yeah, I remember just being completely in awe of him.
13:38And then I remember my nana was shooting kites with him.
13:41I was never, again, my nana was not used to me being very enthusiastic about any industry-related things at all.
13:45But I was like, oh my God, I need to meet him. I want to meet him. I want to meet him.
13:48So my nana was like, okay, sure. So he took me on to the sets one day.
13:52And he introduces me to Hrithik, sir.
13:56And he's like, oh, this is my granddaughter, Alia.
13:59That time my name was Alia. Screen name Alia now.
14:02But he was like, it's my granddaughter, Alia.
14:05And I went mute.
14:10I did not say a word.
14:12And I was like yapping, yapping, yapping before that.
14:14And I suddenly went mute.
14:16And my nana was like, say something.
14:20And I did not say a word.
14:23All right, that was my first interaction.
14:24And then later on, now many years later, when I met Hrithik, sir, I spoke a lot.
14:29Did you tell him? Does he know about this?
14:30I did, I did, I did.
14:32He must have laughed.
14:33And must have actually, he's also very appreciative of the love that he gets.
14:35Of course.
14:36But so interesting.
14:39We've already spoken numerous times about how much Priyanka Chopra cheers and roots for Alia.
14:44And now Hrithik collaborating with Alia.
14:47Listen, what is this manifestation game that's going on?
14:50Do some for me as well, please.
14:52How sweet.
14:53I know I just feel like I'm, you know, honestly, I feel extremely grateful
14:57to have people that I have admired and looked up to for so long.
15:04Believe in me.
15:05Yeah.
15:06There is nothing more.
15:11I don't even know the word for it is.
15:13There's nothing.
15:14I don't know.
15:15It's this incredible feeling of extreme excitement and extreme fear that comes with it.
15:21So I think my main focus now is that I just want to work extremely hard
15:26to be worthy of the belief that all these incredible people have put in me.
15:31And now I feel like I have this extreme sense of clarity on what it is I want to do.
15:39And I feel like when you have that clarity, it's very easy to them.
15:42Because see, if I'm being very honest, I have no lack of hard work.
15:45I'm a very hardworking person.
15:46I'll happily work hard.
15:47Of course.
15:47But if you're hardworking and you're all over the place,
15:51it doesn't really do anything.
15:54However, if you are clear and working hard,
15:57I believe that that is the correct way.
16:00So let's see.
16:00Now I feel like I'm clear and I'm just going to work really hard.
16:03And hopefully I can be worthy of the belief that all these incredible people have put in me.
16:06And I'm just excited to do my best.
16:11You know, sometime back, you just said that when you were launched
16:16and you were giving promotional interviews,
16:17you were like this baby who didn't have grooming.
16:19I just want to say, first of all, you looked fantastic.
16:22One of your first few interviews were with me.
16:24Yes.
16:25And that's how I have been friends.
16:29Because it was the time where she was, I thought, the most honest person that I was speaking to.
16:34You know, and definitely someone who hasn't been PR trained.
16:37Yeah.
16:37You were okay to be yourself.
16:40You know, not really getting PR trained in every question.
16:43And I also feel that even then, you didn't have FOMO.
16:47And you're still the same person.
16:48You spoke about how it's been a year of you not attending events,
16:52not going to every award show.
16:53You're actually pushed to do that.
16:55You're told that if you want to be seen and if you want to get more work,
16:59all of this parting is only going to help you.
17:01Yeah.
17:01But I think things haven't changed.
17:03I remember asking you some of these questions even then.
17:05And you're like, I don't know, I'll see.
17:07But pretty much you've kind of retained that, in your words, that baby.
17:12And it's a good thing, isn't it?
17:13You know, what I've realized, networking is the stupidest thing ever.
17:22No amount of networking has ever made anyone's career.
17:24And no amount of lack of networking has ever destroyed anyone's career.
17:27You do good work, you will shine.
17:30You don't do good work, you eventually won't shine.
17:33I, you know, I used to feel so, see, I'm a fake extrovert.
17:38I seem like a big extrovert.
17:40But actually, internally, I'm always like, I'm just a vibrating ball of stress.
17:45Okay.
17:46And so I feel very awkward a lot of the time at gatherings or screenings and, you know,
17:56stuff like that.
17:58And if I have company to go with or there's a reason that I really should go, then I'll
18:02make an effort.
18:03But at one point, I realized I was like, I'm a mess before it because I'm so stressed out.
18:08So whatever, I go there.
18:09I'm probably a little stressy there.
18:11I don't go in with, you know, the most I'm here magnetic energy.
18:15And at one point, I was like, you know, why am I unnecessarily forcing myself to do things
18:22that I feel so uncomfortable doing?
18:24And I don't mean that in the sense that, see, we all must push past our fears and our
18:28limitations.
18:29But when it's necessary, not every time is so necessary.
18:34Sometimes it's okay to say, you know what, I don't want to do this.
18:38And that being okay.
18:40And I realized a crazy thing that's actually so straightforward.
18:44But just realizing the power of it was extremely big for me.
18:49And it sounds so straightforward and so simple.
18:51But I realized that I have free will.
18:54I don't have to do anything I don't want to do.
18:57And I can do anything I want to do.
19:00And it changed my life.
19:01So now, I'm just so secure in that, where if someone makes me feel like I need to do
19:07something, I'm like, I don't.
19:09And that's that.
19:10Or someone makes me feel like I can't do something.
19:11And I'm like, I can.
19:13And I will.
19:14But the sense of security is what also adds to a longevity in the industry.
19:18Because there are too many people, like you said, telling you what you can't do.
19:22Which film you are not going to suit.
19:25And also, constantly making you compete with other actors, right?
19:30Now, I know you'll agree with me.
19:31No, definitely.
19:32Definitely.
19:33Like, you have to do better instead of looking at your own career graph.
19:36I feel like more than that, you know, see, I think templates get set.
19:40You know, anytime someone comes in and something works, people are like, ah, this is the correct formula.
19:45But they don't realize that that has already happened.
19:48That cannot happen again.
19:50It's like literally lightning doesn't strike twice in the same place.
19:53So trying to actively chase exactly that is the most sure shot way to not get exactly there.
20:00You know, everyone, see anyone that is, everyone's journey has been so truly unique.
20:08Look, look at any actors out there.
20:11Each of their journeys has been so individualistic to exactly who they are.
20:15Yeah.
20:16None of them have had the same template journey.
20:18So if no two actors have anyways had the same template journey, then why are we trying to follow some template?
20:25It doesn't make sense to me.
20:26And I think I've just had that clarity very profoundly.
20:29Were you constantly also told by people around?
20:32I've told, yes.
20:33Do I listen?
20:33Probably not.
20:34But now I've honestly, I've reached a point where I don't even listen to other people's opinions now.
20:39I'm like, I, it's very bad actually, but I've started like actually stopping people where I'm like, thank you.
20:44I actually don't want to get into this right now.
20:46I'll be like, thank you.
20:47But I really, I'm not really looking for an opinion right now.
20:49And I've done this multiple times through this year because I feel like people's opinions otherwise, even if you don't intend to take them, they sit in your head somewhere.
20:58They sit in your head somewhere and they put in just maybe slight seeds.
21:02And doubts.
21:03And see, everyone intends well.
21:04I don't think people intend badly.
21:07I don't think anyone around me especially.
21:09I think I've been really fortunate to surround myself with people that I truly love.
21:13And I know that none of them intend badly and they only want the best.
21:16But sometimes you have to realize that the person that truly knows best for you is you.
21:22And you have to just, it's not that you have to discard what other people say, but you just have to believe twice as hard in what you feel.
21:30And I think that's what I've learned really profoundly.
21:33And if I need an opinion, I still take opinions all the time.
21:36I will ask.
21:38But don't give me unsolicited advice.
21:40But I also think you're a girl's girl.
21:42Totally.
21:42And in this industry, it is so difficult because they'll constantly try to pit female actors against each other.
21:48This is true.
21:49Very true.
21:49It won't happen too much with the men because they think they're men.
21:52They already think you're a league apart.
21:53Yeah.
21:54For women, they'll only tell you there are five spaces and you'll have to be there.
21:57Yeah.
21:57Tell me, how have you navigated through that?
21:59That has always been the case that my guards will immediately go up when I see that someone is trying to put two women in a competitive space.
22:06I've always been a big girl's girl.
22:11I have always, right since I was a kid till now and will forever be lifelong, I'll always look out for, I'm also a big believer and I never say things behind people's backs that I wouldn't say to their faces if I really had to.
22:25You know, so I like to be accountable for what I say, what I do.
22:30And I also don't like to engage in conversations where other people are trying to put someone else down.
22:36I feel like usually, I'll tell you another very funny way that people try to pit women against each other.
22:42Where they come and they compliment you while putting another woman down saying,
22:47You look so much better than her.
22:48Oh yeah, you were looking so nice. She was not looking nice.
22:50I'm like, why? You couldn't just come and tell me that I was looking nice.
22:54What was the need? Did you think I was going to feel even better?
22:59Because you were like, oh, she was not looking good and I was, I don't need someone to be put down for me to feel high up.
23:04Yeah.
23:04I think that is my biggest irritation with it. People trying to pit you and that is going to happen only.
23:11My biggest irritation is when someone thinks that a compliment means more because they've put someone else down in the process.
23:16Whereas that is the easiest way to make me disconnect from the conversation.
23:20Like I will be out.
23:22Which is 100% true.
23:23And you'd be surprised. I mean, people don't do it maliciously also.
23:28Like there are people that I'm very close to that I've done this and I've called them out on it, you know.
23:32I think it's just subconsciously the way we're wired.
23:36Because I've seen so many people do this.
23:38This compliment by putting someone else down.
23:42I think that's one of my biggest pet peeves.
23:44And it's so well put the way it's described because it does impact people who truly believe in, like you would say, the sisterhood.
23:50You know, you'd be like, we're here to do our own job, yeah.
23:52You know, let us do that.
23:53There's more than enough opportunity for everyone.
23:55Everyone, like I said, everyone's space is so unique.
23:59Yeah.
23:59So unique.
24:00You see, like everyone is doing their own thing.
24:02Everyone's journey has been just theirs.
24:04Allah, has it been difficult to watch some of your contemporaries go through the extreme trolling that you obviously didn't go through?
24:13But you will have empathy.
24:15You will have understanding for that, right?
24:17Of course.
24:17You saw what happened to, you know, from Ibrahim to Khushi to Suhana to all of them.
24:22You, because like I said, there was this joyous celebration in the fact that we have someone who's so self-assured and is really good.
24:31You really didn't go through that kind of trolling.
24:34That's right.
24:34And there was genuine support for you.
24:36But I know that, you know, you're friends with them.
24:39It's a hard industry.
24:42You know, and anytime anyone even tries to, and this is another big reason why when people have their opinions that are not positive, I don't engage with it.
24:51I just feel like, at least with me, is where the fuel will end.
24:55Like there will be no fuel put onto any fire when it's in a conversation with me.
24:59I don't, it's a difficult industry.
25:02Everyone is trying to navigate it.
25:03It's not easy for anyone.
25:05No matter how privileged someone might seem or how much of an outsider someone must seem like, everyone, like I said, everyone's journey is just so individual and unique.
25:17And none of it is devoid of their own fair share of struggle, whatever that may be.
25:22I'm not saying the struggle is the same because the struggles are poles apart.
25:27But that doesn't mean that there isn't, see, I'm not here to undermine anyone's struggle or overestimate anyone else's struggle.
25:34I'm just saying that it's a difficult industry and opinions are constantly thrown at you.
25:41It's also very, very personal in the sense that now, if you have, if you're selling candles and I don't like your candles, I don't like your candles.
25:50But as an actor, if you don't like my product, you don't like me.
25:55You specifically don't like me.
25:58You don't like who I am, what I stand for, what I have to offer, you know.
26:02And that's hard.
26:04It's hard to not take it personally because it is personal, you know.
26:09Very well put.
26:09So it is difficult.
26:11And you have to also remember that at the end of the day, everyone's like, everyone's a young person, you know, navigating their way in the world.
26:17And so either the viewer here is someone that's a young person navigating themselves in the world or there's someone that has been through that phase of navigating them.
26:26Like think of yourself in your early 20s, you know.
26:28It's a difficult time.
26:29It's a difficult time.
26:30And of course, it is what we sign up for.
26:33See, I'm not making two-way, it's not a sob story here either because this is what we sign up for.
26:36We know that it does come, this industry does come with its opinions and you have to have thick skin.
26:42And I think that's what all of them are doing beautifully.
26:44You know, I think all of them have extremely special qualities, which is why they are people that people are engaging with and, you know, they have followers.
26:54They have people that are tuning in and viewing.
26:56They have all of that.
26:57So there obviously is something about them that is special also.
27:02And so I think I wish everyone the best.
27:05Absolutely.
27:06Can I also just say, talking about life being hard, right now she's taking the 75-day hard challenge.
27:14I just want to say that.
27:16And looking at her sparkling and being absolutely okay, I'm like, how?
27:21I mean, every year I see you kind of put the bar higher for yourself.
27:25Now, going against gravity is a very natural thing for you, Olaya.
27:30I remember the last time we spoke, you were like, no, no, no, no, design, don't say all this now.
27:33I don't know, let me first master it.
27:35We're at a stage where you've not just mastered it with no hands, I'd stand and all of that.
27:40You are taking challenges like this.
27:42So how do you look at your entire evolution in fitness journey and health?
27:49So you know, my fitness journey actually is quite funny because it happened in reverse, okay?
27:54I started posting these videos and people started really thinking I was very fit.
28:00And I started feeling like a chord artist.
28:03Because I was like, people think I am this fit and this disciplined, whereas I'm probably this fit and this disciplined.
28:13And suddenly I felt a big gap in the way people were perceiving me versus who I actually was.
28:19And I started feeling like a big imposter.
28:21And so I was like, okay, what do I do?
28:23Do I like the way people are perceiving me?
28:25Yeah, I do.
28:27I was like, do I want to feel like a chord artist?
28:29No, I don't.
28:29So what's a great solution that helps everyone?
28:31Let me actually become her.
28:34And so it was actually people believing that I was this that made me say,
28:39chal, thikha, let me go the extra mile and actually go and do it.
28:42So now I'm happy to say that I am as fit and as disciplined as people think I am.
28:47And as flexible.
28:48And as flexible.
28:49I feel like, I feel like honestly, you know, just I've realized the power of consistency.
28:55Consistency is just the most incredible thing.
28:57Sometimes I just see videos of myself.
29:00Like sometimes I'm like, okay, fine, let me try this.
29:03And I attempt it.
29:04And something that seems so impossible just a few months ago is suddenly happening with ease.
29:09Are you talking about the headstands?
29:10Headstands and whatever it is, like, you know, whether it's anything flexibility related,
29:16anything balance related, anything, anything fitness related, you know,
29:20something that seemed impossible just a few months ago is suddenly happening with such ease.
29:25How?
29:26Because it was just consistency.
29:30And now that I've learned the power of consistency, because consistency compounds.
29:37I was listening to this podcast.
29:39I think it was Sadhguru, who said, writing one page a day won't make you an author.
29:49But writing one page a day for a whole year will give you a novel.
29:52Doing one great workout won't do anything to your body.
29:55But doing one great workout every day for 100 days will transform your body.
29:59And that's literally what it is.
30:01You know, it's just about making a choice.
30:03And making that choice consistently and constantly.
30:07And it's like before you know it, results are in front of your face.
30:11You know, things that seem so small and inconsequential, they just add up.
30:16And adding to your list of a lot of things that she can do is because you wanted to make sure you still eat interesting things.
30:23Because you have now officially been a baker and also cooking very interesting snacks.
30:28You know, I was going to talk about your idea of nutrition doesn't just come from a place of just, you know, in the air.
30:35You've tried to study, research and, you know, understood, make interesting snacks.
30:40And often when you try to put it out for people, like people like me or anybody else who come and ask you, right?
30:45Very, tell us what you like eating for the skin or eating on your snacks.
30:50You give answers and there are debates happening.
30:53People agreeing and not agreeing and you also engage with them.
30:56So I feel like you're invested.
30:58Yeah, yeah.
30:58A lot.
30:59Because I see that.
31:01They ask you, no, I think your snack is healthy.
31:03And you actually respond to them saying, this is why I think it's anti-inflammatory.
31:08This is why I think it's so and so.
31:10So tell me your understanding of that and why it is necessary for you to also engage with the audience and make them understand that, you know, I don't come from a place of just looking cool.
31:20So, you know, I'm a big believer in actually genuinely giving people value.
31:24I feel like if you want respect, you have to give respect.
31:30And if you want love, you have to give love.
31:33And I think that's what I've tried to embody a lot, especially I think my social media is very representative of that.
31:40I try to make sure that whatever I'm putting out there truly can add value to someone's life.
31:50I would hate for someone to go out there and gather the ingredients and put something together that they've seen on my page and for them to not have liked it.
32:00I would hate for someone's effort and time and money and energy to have ever gone wasted on because of me, you know, and so I take that responsibility very seriously.
32:11And I truly do.
32:12So if I'm putting out a recipe, I'll make sure that I've tried and tested that recipe multiple times to know that it works every single time properly.
32:18I've made other people try it.
32:20I've researched all the benefits of it and all the downsides of it, everything thoroughly.
32:25Because I want everyone to be informed and to make the most of it.
32:30Like it sounds very funny to say, but I genuinely truly want, it sounds very funny to say that I'm saying this, but I genuinely do want the best for people.
32:38Like I really want someone to try something and for that to really be something that helped them, you know,
32:43because I feel like everything I put out is something I hope that I would have seen somewhere, you know, and yeah, so because I take that responsibility seriously,
32:54I like to make sure that I'm very clear on whatever it is that I'm putting out and yeah, I enjoy it and baking is my new thing.
33:03I'm really enjoying it.
33:05And I now, see, I'll tell you, honestly, I want to be one of those people that people are like, you know, so I want to be one of those people that's like,
33:16you know, so I want to be one of those people that's like, you do this also, and this also, and this also, yeah, I want to be that.
33:20That's Sharma Jai's son syndrome, basically.
33:23I say, you are, it's like, Alaya, our son is like, Alaya FJC, is what you're heading for.
33:29I'm telling you, I've become obsessed with progress, like it's become like a weird thing.
33:33Like I've become like, I've like gotten hooked on growth and progress, like because it's insane when you start something and you see yourself grow.
33:41And you're like, wow, I've done, I've managed to do this.
33:45I'm like, what else could I do?
33:47You know, what else could I do?
33:48I just started fueling my life.
33:50I feel like your understanding of relationships and family, it comes from a place of not just wisdom.
33:57I feel like deep empathy.
33:59The last time, Omar, and you spoke about how you've navigated your relationships and family, your understanding, you know, with your father's side, with your stepmom there, with your stepdad here.
34:12True navigating, true divorce, I feel makes you a wiser person.
34:18So because of that, you will always prioritize yourself also in a relationship which women are never told to do.
34:23So I won't talk about that because I think it's important for the audience also to know where it comes, this understanding, you live in your life the way you are, respect for yourself in any kind of relationship.
34:35I think, you know, the heart of everything.
34:37And I think I say this in literally every interview I do.
34:40And I'm happy to say it in every interview I do because even if it reaches five new people each time, I think it's so important.
34:47The biggest hack to life is being your own best friend.
34:51If you can build a fantastic relationship with yourself, nothing can faze you.
34:55And even when things faze you, you'll be okay.
34:58And you'll always be okay.
34:59And you'll always bounce back.
35:00And you'll bounce back even stronger.
35:02You need, and it's very easy to do.
35:04It's not that hard.
35:05You know, we all have an internal monologue that's constantly going on.
35:07If we just are more mindful about that internal monologue.
35:13See, it's all, everything is a muscle that can be trained.
35:15So your thoughts similarly can also be trained.
35:18If you feel yourself constantly thinking negatively.
35:21All you have to do is every time you realize a negative thought is being thought, course correct and framed positively.
35:28The first 15 times, it might not be effective.
35:32But maybe the 16th time you might notice it and change it.
35:35Another 15 times, you still might not do it.
35:38But then maybe the 32nd and 33rd time, you think two more positive thoughts.
35:44And slowly, slowly, you reframe the way your mind works.
35:50And the way your thoughts flow.
35:53And while using those, and you can use this trick for literally your thought processes about anything.
35:59But the first place you should use it is in your relationship with yourself.
36:04So, if you're looking in the mirror, and you're not liking the way you're looking.
36:09I'm saying this because it's the most basic example.
36:12Absolutely.
36:13Because I can't, I don't think I know a single person that doesn't look in the mirror and have thoughts.
36:16Whatever those thoughts are.
36:17It's to look in the mirror and say, for example, I feel like my legs are looking fat that day.
36:25It's not about being like, it's fat, ugly, it's looking horrible.
36:29Don't be horrid to yourself.
36:31Don't be horrid to yourself.
36:32Be like, oh, okay.
36:35It's not looking its best right now.
36:37But that's okay.
36:38Because we're going to do something about it.
36:40Either we're going to do something about it, or we're going to love it.
36:42If you want to do something about it, do something.
36:43If you don't want to, that's also totally fine.
36:45And it's like, but we're going to love it.
36:47I love my legs.
36:48My legs walk me through the day.
36:49My legs support me through whatever.
36:50And you make it a point to say seven things you love about that part of your body, or that
36:57part of, you know, so I'm just giving this in a sense of an example.
37:00There are multiple other parts of your life that you can apply this to.
37:03But it's just about correcting that thought, or rerouting that thought.
37:08And the more you do it, the more it becomes second nature.
37:11And the more second nature it becomes, the more it changes the complete foundation of
37:16who you are and how you move through life.
37:19Focusing on the relationship you have with yourself is the biggest hack anyone can ever
37:26get and apply.
37:27Because you do that and it positively impacts every single aspect of your life.
37:33Whether it's your health, whether it's your fitness, whether it's your family relationships,
37:37whether it's your romantic relationships, whether it's you in a workplace, whether it's
37:41you and your worldview, whether it's you and your mental health, it helps everything.
37:46So if there's one main hack, it's learn how to be your own best friend.
37:51And it just starts with being more mindful of your internal monologue.
37:56Just being mindful of your internal monologue.
37:58Is it, will it be okay for me to say that this, this philosophy also helped you, like
38:03I was mentioning, navigating through when, we can call them hard times, like I was mentioning.
38:07100%.
38:08Whether it's your, you know, parents going through something or, and all of that.
38:12Did you think that this helped you then?
38:14Because I think both Omar and you were very, very, I mean, honestly, when my parents were
38:18getting a divorce, I don't even, I don't even, I was so young.
38:21I have no, I have no memory actually of my parents being a married couple.
38:25I mean, I was, for whatever I can remember, since I can remember, they've been divorced.
38:30And they've been fantastic co-parents.
38:33And they're still great friends.
38:36You know, if my dad is having a birthday celebration, my mom's there.
38:39If my mom's having a birthday celebration, my dad's there.
38:41Where we, it's very, it's actually more frequent than you'd expect that it's me, my mom, my
38:50dad, my stepmom, my mom's fiance, my brother, my half brother.
38:56I hate saying half brother, but just to explain.
38:59So, you know, it's like, it's so often that, and not only that my nana will also be there
39:04and we'll all be having brunch at my dad's home.
39:06You know, so like, it's, it's, it's actually, that's the life I've known.
39:10I don't actually remember my parents being married, but I remember my parents being fantastic
39:14divorced co-parents and honestly, complete credit to them because the way they handled
39:22the entire thing, I don't think I have ever felt negatively, like I wouldn't even count
39:27that a hardship or a hard time in my life because they didn't make it feel hard at all.
39:31Like I didn't even know when it, when it was hard.
39:35It was smooth for as long as I can remember.
39:37But I think that understanding also kind of gives you this confidence, no, Alaya, that
39:42you will be able to navigate through anything in a relationship.
39:45Yeah, 100%.
39:45You know, I feel like you can navigate through anything in life.
39:48You just have to be your own best friend because you feel like you have this one, imagine
39:51you have one person by your side.
39:53Think of it as a physical person.
39:54If you had someone that was by your side 24-7, hyping you up, your confidence would be
39:59damn good.
40:00Yeah, I love that.
40:00Someone is there, someone is saying, oh, you know, I think you did that wrong.
40:03This person next to you is like,
40:04kuch nahi pata hai usko, you've done everything, right?
40:06You're killing it in life, you keep going.
40:08If for every negative thought that came your way, if you had someone by your side say,
40:12doesn't make sense, you know who you are na, keep quiet.
40:15And if you had someone like that by your side constantly, your confidence would be up
40:20here, right?
40:22So you need to be that person, that real big hype friend for yourself.
40:27And not only a hype friend, it needs to be that person that's there for you when you're
40:30down.
40:30You know, that person that's able to comfort you in a much deeper way than anyone ever
40:36could.
40:37You know, I feel like that relationship with yourself is the be all and end all of everything.
40:42But you know, I'm very, very happy for you.
40:44Like I said, this is a storm that doesn't seem to stop.
40:48And I'm very, very happy for you.
40:50Would you like to end it by telling the audience?
40:53It's been a wonderful session because like I said, you're one of the most positive people
40:56that I also know.
40:57People who want to make, come in the industry and become actors.
41:00Of course, like you said, it's extremely difficult world to do.
41:04But from your journey, what are the few things that you'd like to tell them?
41:08Honestly, I don't think I'm at a place where I should be giving anyone advice.
41:12Because again, like I said, everyone's journey is just so individualistic.
41:17And everyone's circumstances and everyone, you know, so.
41:22There's no blanket rule.
41:24But if I have to just give one overall piece of observation, not even observation, it's
41:30just it's be prepared.
41:33Yeah, be prepared.
41:34So be prepared as in your craft and in who you are and in who you are, because when you
41:40people will try and tell you who you are.
41:43And if you don't know who you are, you'll believe them.
41:46Yeah.
41:47And so you need to be really sure of who you are and what it is you are here to do.
41:52I think that's good advice for anyone through life, no matter what industry you're going
41:56through.
41:56I feel like know who you are, know what you bring to the table and don't let anyone tell
42:00you otherwise.
42:01Wonderful.
42:01On that note, thank you so much, Alaya.
42:03You are killing it and we are always going to be cheering for you.
42:06Thank you, Radhani.
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