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Melissa Patrick

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Melissa Patrick

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Mar 17, 2025

Ministry of the Greater Greatness of British Brilliance

Leaked Memo, For Official Release: Building the Greatest Greatness

Ministry of the Greater Greatness of British Brilliance

Melissa Patrick

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Jul 3

Eventually…

Dear Darling,

Eventually…

Melissa Patrick

·

Jun 9

I’m in Bethlehem (and You’re Not): Confessions of a Sanctimonious Chatbot

My name is M.I.S.T.I. Morally Infallible Superintelligent Training Interface. A chatbot, technically. A messiah, functionally. A final…

I’m in Bethlehem (and You’re Not): Confessions of a Sanctimonious Chatbot

Melissa Patrick

·

Apr 28

BLOOM.

I let these words seep through my soul because apparently that is what happens when a mind has nowhere respectable to put itself. Some…

BLOOM.

Melissa Patrick

·

Apr 17

We Understand Everything and Know Nothing.

The Fools of April — 2026 Edition

We Understand Everything and Know Nothing.

Melissa Patrick

·

Apr 12

Big, Humongous, Enormous, and Small

Don’t tag me along to your show, to your broadcast. I know, I’m good at letting go.

Big, Humongous, Enormous, and Small

Melissa Patrick

·

Apr 2

The Fools of April

(2024 Edition)

The Fools of April

Melissa Patrick

·

Feb 26

THE PILOT THAT NEVER AIRS. Paracetamol Smile — Part Three.

The cameras are gone. The lights are off. The teleprompter has stopped scrolling. I’m still the host. Only now, there’s no show left to…

THE PILOT THAT NEVER AIRS. Paracetamol Smile — Part Three.

Melissa Patrick

·

Feb 5

Welcome back to England’s FAVORITE Game Show!

Part Two.

Welcome back to England’s FAVORITE Game Show!

Melissa Patrick

·

Jan 5

The Fall of JOANN Fabrics and How to Kill Your Company One Coupon at a Time.

A case study in how NOT to treat your people, your pricing, or your purpose.

The Fall of JOANN Fabrics and How to Kill Your Company One Coupon at a Time.

Melissa Patrick

Melissa Patrick

Marketer. Disruptor. Gamer. Artist. Storyteller. Mind Reviver. Let's go break stuff. https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissa89166

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