Let be
It is okay if, at an age when I am expected to be mature, some people still consider me immature. It is okay if I am called childish, stubborn, or strange, or even accused of lacking cultural understanding or proper manners.
It is also okay if some people dislike the way I think or behave.
Perhaps there is still much I have yet to understand. There are ways of expressing myself that I need to improve, behaviors I need to reflect on, and perspectives I have yet to explore.
But sometimes I wonder: Is maturity always measured by how readily we agree with others? Does showing respect necessarily mean agreeing with them? And does questioning long-standing traditions truly indicate a lack of cultural understanding or good manners?
I grew up surrounded by values and traditions that hold deep meaning for many people, and I respect them. At the same time, I have religious beliefs that guide the way I choose to live.
I know I do not always live up to those beliefs. There are shortcomings I still need to acknowledge and work on. Yet I do not believe that being imperfect in practicing my faith means I should stop striving to live by it.
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I do not wish to use my faith to justify my ego, nor do I want to make other people’s approval the sole measure of what is right.
Perhaps I am stubborn. Perhaps some of my actions make others uncomfortable. I am willing to learn from these things. Yet I am also learning that becoming a better person does not necessarily mean becoming the person everyone else expects me to be.
I want to be able to listen without always agreeing, to show respect without compromising my principles, and to accept criticism without giving up the freedom to think for myself.
If, in the end, I am still seen as immature, strange, or simply not good enough by someone else’s standards, that is okay.
Perhaps what I need to learn is not how to make everyone understand me, but how to remain open to understanding others without losing sight of myself.
I do not know whether people will ever see me differently. Perhaps they will not. And perhaps they do not have to.
After all, I am still learning to distinguish between the principles worth holding on to and the ego I need to let go of.
And I do not have to pretend that I have already figured it all out.
