nicotine
i really wanna tell you this
something that i've already said
a thousand times before.
but hun, you're like a song i can't resist
fucking stuck in my head
like an earworm.
playing over and over again
at the worst possible times
making me sick to my stomach
taking over my thoughts and filling them with you
i just don't get the deal with you, babe.
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i've been up for the past few nights
rewinding all of our conversations
rewinding all of the lies
i've let slip out of my mouth
taking back all the careless words i've said
in hopes you'll forgive me.
but babe, if there's one thing
that i'll say right, it's that
i love you.
honestly,
tenderly,
and tragically.
can you call me?
tell me when the sun's shining
because i've been lost in thoughts of you
longer than i'd like to admit.
i can't even believe
this is not a dream,
that somehow you're still here,
keeping me up all night.
somehow you're just for me.
making me nervous.
you burn for me like a cigarette
shining in the dead of night
you asked "what do you need, nicotine?"
you're wrong, babe
because i can barely talk straight.
shit, i can't even think straight
whenever you're around.
you're filling my room with your smoke
so come over, stay the night
and let me unwind in your arms.
and when the night finally ends, babe,
i hope i'll never kill this feeling
because i'll probably blurt out something stupid like
"please stay, because i really want you to want me"
you'll laugh and go
"okay, i do, but i really need to leave"
oh there you go again
kissing the right side of my neck,
looking back from the hallway,
long enough for me to memorize your eyes,
leaving me on my doorstep.
and before i'm back in bed,
i'll look out for you from my window
watching you blend in with the crowd
before i'm left waiting for your number again
