- 4 months ago
First broadcast 18th April 1986.
The lads are impatient to be off to Spain, but just as they reach the departure lounge, things begin to go wrong.
Gary Holton - Wayne Norris
Christopher Fairbank - Albert Moxey
Pat Roach - Bomber Busbridge
Jimmy Nail - Oz Osborne
Timothy Spall - Barry Taylor
Kevin Whately - Neville Hope
Tim Healy - Dennis Patterson
Bill Paterson - Ally Fraser
Lesley Saint-John - Vicki
Val McLane - Norma
Julia Tobin - Brenda Hope
Madelaine Newton - Christine Chadwick
Sammy Johnson - Martin Cooper (as Sammy Johnston)
Shainey Karn - Wendy
Michael Burns - Ray Clegg
Terri Holmes - Receptionist
Paul Antony-Barber - Tour Guide
Anne Miles - Receptionist
Pete Morrison - Bouncer
Denise Bryson - Wendy's Friend
Bob Smeaton - Shop Assistant (as Robert Smeaton)
Walter McMonagle - Irishman
Fiona Cooper - Pamela
Catherine Whately - Debbie Hope
The lads are impatient to be off to Spain, but just as they reach the departure lounge, things begin to go wrong.
Gary Holton - Wayne Norris
Christopher Fairbank - Albert Moxey
Pat Roach - Bomber Busbridge
Jimmy Nail - Oz Osborne
Timothy Spall - Barry Taylor
Kevin Whately - Neville Hope
Tim Healy - Dennis Patterson
Bill Paterson - Ally Fraser
Lesley Saint-John - Vicki
Val McLane - Norma
Julia Tobin - Brenda Hope
Madelaine Newton - Christine Chadwick
Sammy Johnson - Martin Cooper (as Sammy Johnston)
Shainey Karn - Wendy
Michael Burns - Ray Clegg
Terri Holmes - Receptionist
Paul Antony-Barber - Tour Guide
Anne Miles - Receptionist
Pete Morrison - Bouncer
Denise Bryson - Wendy's Friend
Bob Smeaton - Shop Assistant (as Robert Smeaton)
Walter McMonagle - Irishman
Fiona Cooper - Pamela
Catherine Whately - Debbie Hope
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:00No one said it was going to be easy
00:16Nobody said it had to be fair
00:25All of the chances taken together
00:29And all the changes we had to share
00:35Well, you think we've made it all worthwhile
00:42Then you realize no one cares
00:50But we're going to get it right this time
00:54Cause we've passed the point of no return
01:01And we're never going to go
01:05Never going to get it
01:09How did you get hold of this?
01:26Huh?
01:27Oh, I phoned my mate Terry
01:29He was surprised to hear from us, like, you know
01:31Cause he didn't know I'd gone over the wall
01:33Anyway, I got him to go round to my auntie Vi's, you know
01:37It's where I was staying prior to my arrest
01:39And he got it out my gear and posted it to us
01:41You take some chances you do, Mox
01:45Why?
01:46This bloke Terry knows where you are
01:48And your auntie Vi, and if she's a blabber
01:50I'm not a complete fool, you know
01:52I had a centpost restaurant
01:54I don't need renewing, Neff
01:58It's got a couple of years to go, hasn't it?
02:00That's not the point, though, is it, Mox?
02:02You've still got two years to run on your sentence
02:06And there's people out looking for you
02:07Your unwanted notices and computers
02:10And you don't want to chance your arm on passport control
02:13It'll be all right
02:15I mean, it's only a local airport up here, isn't it?
02:19I mean, it's not Heathrow with dope dealers and diamond smugglers and that
02:22Just a couple of dozy Geordies
02:24Hey, I'll scud you, Moxie, I heard that
02:26Oh, aye
02:27Do you know what happened to my cousin Paul?
02:29What?
02:30He was picked up in Newcastle airport
02:31They dragged him outside, gave him a right going over
02:34And he's just an ordinary bloke with his three kids
02:37On his way to Majora with a load of camping gear
02:39Aye
02:40What happened then?
02:41Couldn't he afford a VAT on his tent?
02:43No, Paul's divorced, right?
02:45And whenever they see a single parent gone through with kids
02:48They always check them out in case they don't want a runner
02:49What's that got to do with me?
02:53Well, I'm just saying that they're more vigilant than what you take them for
02:56Oh, we're playing this game or we're not, man, eh?
03:00Neville, it's all broke
03:02Oh, right
03:03Right, now get your finger out, you two up
03:07You haven't put no ball yet
03:08I've just got too used to pool tables, mate, man
03:11This table seems immense
03:14Are we, er, are we to understand that you're
03:19That you're back to playing Moxie now, then, are we?
03:22I reckon so, yeah
03:23Yeah, well, everyone who just got used to calling in Brendan
03:25Right?
03:26Oh, where's your point, then?
03:27Aye, jumping, why not?
03:28Be sangry at the night, though, eh?
03:32Got the ticket
03:32Aye
03:33Is it great?
03:34Oh, er, have you got dig sorted out, eh?
03:36Cos I'm not kippin' a knee doughty, filthy pence
03:39You only with cockroaches crawl all on me feet, mate
03:41No self-respecting cockroach again near your feet, bud
03:44Ha, yes
03:45The Marama Hotel
03:46Sounds good enough, mate
03:48What an amazing coincidence, eh?
03:51What?
03:52Amazing to me
03:53Staying at the Marama Hotel on our first night in Goza
03:57Oh, on the second night
03:59We transferred to our luxury villa
04:01It was nestled high in the hills
04:03Far above the glistening briny
04:05Oh, my boss still
04:06See, it was a slip of £120 a week, mate
04:09I had a mate who did your ironing
04:11Bloody man, anybody gives a tosh, man
04:13Come on, just take you a shot, man
04:14All right
04:15What time do we leave?
04:33Half past three check-in, right?
04:43Come on,Script
04:55And I'm in quiet
04:58I'm in quiet
05:00This place
05:01I'm in quiet
05:02ontoijow
05:04Button
05:04No, we're in quiet
05:05We wouldn't be banning
05:06cuidado
05:07MAGkä
05:08Ya, ya, ya knew
05:08안
05:13We don't do that in your size.
05:15Oh, typical. How come they wouldn't make a club of these days to fit Michael Jackson?
05:19They've got the Italian paratrooper in your size.
05:23You can't be serious. Who's ever holding an Italian paratrooper?
05:29Hey, Lawrence. What have you written on that?
05:31Nah, they're amazing buying that designer swag, man.
05:34They're paying 25 notes for the label before you start.
05:37Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, you know, in my bay, you see, your label's a bit of an entree, isn't it?
05:42I mean, when he walks into the old racquet club, they expect you to have an alligator on your left hip.
05:51I don't think it's Marbella in point of fact, is it?
05:54I think it's more Fangarola, isn't it?
05:57Yeah, but, I mean, we'll be socialising in Marbella, won't we?
06:00Cos you don't get your cheap jet-save tours there, mate, or your football elegans.
06:04See, Marbella, it's your international playground for the rich and famous.
06:08Nah, not my sort, that type.
06:10Underneath their glittering exterior, they just leave shallow, meaningless lives.
06:14Shallow relationships would do for me, Barry?
06:16No-one ever drowned in shallow water?
06:18You will, if anyone will, Wayne.
06:20Your whole lifestyle lends a new depth of meaning to the word shallow.
06:23Never out of fashion, are they for me, Otis?
06:30Oh, yes. Magnum P.I., is it?
06:35Pick up, Oz.
06:36I hope that hotel on Marama's got a lift.
06:39Hey, why?
06:40You'll never get upstairs in them, will you?
06:42Well, you must admit, they don't give me much freedom of expression, do they?
06:46I missed. What the heck?
06:49I'll get them back on the road a bit quicker, by all of you.
06:52I don't think I can do anything quick in these, mate.
06:54What do you think, Mugs?
06:55Huh?
06:56Oh, there's everybody coming, yeah.
06:57It's amazing what our entry into the European communities have done, isn't it, eh?
06:58Who'd you thought, eh, you can now buy five battalions all again in Newcastle?
07:14Yeah, yeah, it works both ways, you know.
07:16Probably you can all buy a piece of pudding in Milan.
07:19Very reasonable, actually, this was.
07:22I'd guess how much it was gone, I'd guess.
07:24Oh, I'm not sure, buddy.
07:25Let's have a look.
07:26Do on, Rowan.
07:2712.
07:28Sure.
07:29Nah, it looks pricey.
07:31On the other hand, it's 50% man-made favours.
07:34That's, eh, £42.99.
07:37Well, spot on.
07:38Yeah?
07:39How'd you guess?
07:40Have you seen that programme, The Price Is Right?
07:41Yeah.
07:42Nev's a champion, mate.
07:43Oh, yeah.
07:52Come on in.
07:53Come on in, mate.
07:54Come on.
07:55Come on in, mate.
07:56Come on, come on.
07:57Come on.
07:58Cheers.
07:59Thanks, mate.
08:00Good job.
08:01Good job.
08:02Charleston.
08:03Not been dry, eh, Mox?
08:04Not so bloody dry, mate.
08:05Come on in.
08:06Come on in, no.
08:08Come on in.
08:10Come on, mate.
08:11Come on in.
08:12Come on in, let's get it.
08:13Come on in.
08:14Come on in, look.
08:15Charleston?
08:16It's been dry, eh, Mox?
08:17Not so bloody dry, mate.
08:20Come on.
08:21Come on, let's get it.
08:22Come on.
08:23Come on.
08:24Sir util...
08:25Here?
08:26Here.
08:27Yeah.
08:28Look, get us a bottle of scots, will you?
08:29More unless I've got it.
08:30Level up.
08:31I got it.
08:32It's not the paint.
08:33That way.
08:34Oh, I'll be no serious, man, you know.
08:36He's some of the phasers checked with the tickets of the boons.
08:40It's very interesting to do this, is it?
08:43Listen to this.
08:44It says here, one of the most beautiful roads in all the world
08:48is the road between Marbella and Seville,
08:52incorporating the ancient town of Rhondar.
08:56I'll give that a try, it says.
08:58Interesting oracle.
08:59And it says, an absolute must
09:01is the Alhambra at Granada.
09:07He's got a point, Leek.
09:09It's funny when you think about it.
09:11You know all them places he's talking about.
09:14Granada, Alhambra, the Ritz,
09:17Plaza, Coliseum.
09:20That only them that my English puttals.
09:27What's the problem, Ted?
09:29There's been a hickel.
09:31You don't mean we're not Gary.
09:34We're not going to deal.
09:36Probably the end of the week.
09:38Probably.
09:39That's not a very definite word, probably.
09:41Well, it's as definite as I can be, Neville, isn't it?
09:43You mean I've got to go through all this again?
09:45Where does that leave us, Dennis?
09:47Oh, where would Alhambra sleaze row appear, that?
09:50Really?
09:50Hubshit creek in a bald way of canoe.
09:52Look, I'm sorry, Dennis,
09:58but due to the Spanish immigration laws,
10:00there is just no way at the moment
10:01that I could take a bunch of foreign workers down there.
10:04Now, wait a minute, Alhambra.
10:05You put your brief onto this at least three weeks ago.
10:08He should have told you all that then, man.
10:09Well, he did, Dennis.
10:11A couple of days later, I had it all fixed up.
10:13I'd arrange backhanders with a couple of key Pedro's down there,
10:16but at the last minute,
10:17they're trying to brace me and cop me for a wee bit extra,
10:19and to my mind, it's just a wee bitty too much,
10:22so I told them to stuff it.
10:23Look, I've got a bunch of lunatics down there.
10:34They're all fired up, they've packed their bags,
10:37they've sorted things out with their families,
10:38and if you don't come through this time...
10:39Look, I asked them over tomorrow night.
10:41My house, my hospitality, that'll soften them up for you.
10:44By that time, I should have sorted something out.
10:46Well, I hope so, for your sake.
10:50What time shall I bring them?
10:51Eh, I'll make it about ten.
10:55I mean, feed them first.
11:03Anyway, that's the situation.
11:08Well, I suppose it's at least hospitable of him, isn't it?
11:13Hospitable?
11:14Hospitable, my horse.
11:16Not very hospitable if he's going to do what, is it?
11:19Hospitable.
11:20I'll tell you something.
11:21It's going to take one and a couple of drinks
11:23and a bloody sausage stuck on the end of a toothpick
11:25to pass it by me with all this.
11:27It is a place.
11:27What?
11:28Out the Doris Hall, then?
11:30Right.
11:31Where's your lizard?
11:32Bit of a short place, apparently.
11:33No expense spared.
11:35I'll be a bit dressy then, I suppose.
11:37Oh, yeah, Mops.
11:38You'll have to wear your other pair of calls, wouldn't you?
11:40Uh-huh.
11:41Yeah, how are we getting back to town, Dennis?
11:44Pally's laid on some transport.
11:46Shouldn't be here any minute, I should imagine.
11:47Do we take the wives somewhere in there, or what?
11:52Er, if I know you haven't said.
11:54I know.
11:54Brendan would love to see his place.
11:56Well, I suppose so, but you know,
11:57Ali, man, he's our business, isn't he?
11:59Best to keep the wives out of the picture.
12:11Ray, come on, then.
12:12Ah, of course, the new man's arrived, hasn't he?
12:16Look, we needed something big enough to take all the cases, didn't we?
12:20But!
12:20Listen, you know you wanted me and Debs to go to Spain?
12:38Ah-ha!
12:39Well, it could work out just nice.
12:41I'm due some time off, and Mrs Adams is back on Monday.
12:44So if you don't go to the weekend, we can all fly out together.
12:48Why?
12:48I mean, I'd much prefer that.
12:50I hate flying on me own.
12:52Well, I just thought if I went out there first,
12:55I could see the lay of the landlake.
12:57See, I didn't want to arrive out there with you and Debs,
13:00and find we're stuck in some horrible naff accommodation.
13:02Well, if we're asked, we'll find something better pet.
13:06You can leave that to me while you get on with your work.
13:08Hmm.
13:09Well, what's the matter?
13:10Well, I think it would be better if it was just the lads at first.
13:16I mean, it is a job, you know, and I didn't want Ali to think we're treating it like a family holiday.
13:20I thought the reason you suggested it, Neville, was so your family could have a holiday.
13:24Oh, definitely, I.
13:25Well, look, I'll assess the situation tomorrow night at Ali's.
13:30Why?
13:30What's happening tomorrow night?
13:32Oh, he's invited us over for drinks.
13:34Really?
13:34Oh, I must say I'm down to see his house.
13:36Oh, no, that's definitely just the lads.
13:41Oh.
13:42Is it?
13:43Definitely.
13:44I checked with Dennis.
13:46Asked him specifically.
13:56Can I help you, sir?
13:57Yeah, is Christine Chadwick here, please?
13:58Can I say who it is, please?
14:00Dennis Patterson.
14:02Is it Mr Patterson here, Mrs Chadwick?
14:06What happened?
14:16I couldn't go through with it.
14:18I couldn't bear the thought of not seeing you for three weeks.
14:21So, I put the lads on the plane, I said to Ali, stuff the job.
14:26Who's on strike?
14:27Air traffic control or the baggage handlers?
14:29Well, it's a little bit complicated to explain, but the good news is I'll take you up for a meal tonight, eh?
14:33The bad news is I'm here till nine o'clock.
14:35I'm not going to pick you up for a fight, must.
14:40Okay.
14:40Where shall we go?
14:41Well, I'll find out what the lads are doing, and then I'll book the table.
14:44About 25 mail away.
14:47All right.
14:48See you later.
14:48All right, fine.
15:08Oh, yes, we're going to do you a birthday cake.
15:12Pauline, I'll let you know.
15:15David?
15:19Are you members?
15:20No, but Mr Patterson has to phone you put our names down.
15:22Is that Dennis Patterson?
15:23That's him.
15:24Did Dennis ring?
15:26We also happen to be colleagues at Ali Fraser.
15:29You know, who owns this place?
15:31Colleagues?
15:31Yes.
15:32We work for him, mate.
15:33Same as you.
15:34Is one of you a bummer?
15:36That's me, my dear.
15:37Table for five.
15:38Right, would you just sign here, then, please?
15:44What sort of work you do for Mr Fraser?
15:47We're his legal advisors.
15:49You know, if we ever do make it out to Spain, I might not bother coming back.
16:10What are you on about?
16:12The way I look at it is, when this job's over, you lot all go your separate ways, won't you?
16:16Yeah, I'm back to Square Walk, trying to make a fresh start, isn't it?
16:20So why not over there, where all the English films are?
16:22The way I look at it, Mr Fraser?
16:23The last of their proceeds come from bullying robberies, moxie, swindling the stockings, tights.
16:29It's not really quite your league, is it, mate?
16:31I don't know what you really spent.
16:33What have you ever done?
16:34What have you ever done?
16:34Set for a night wash results.
16:36Site managers, actually.
16:38Come on.
16:39Hold.
16:40Oh, I've done this before you, man.
16:50I don't know, it's all red studs.
16:52Where is she, then?
16:54Tidy tackle.
16:55Jamie's steamed in, innit?
16:57There's plenty of spare windows.
16:57Hello.
16:58Hi.
16:59All right, Barry?
17:01Bummer.
17:02Brendan.
17:03Hello.
17:04Wendy.
17:04Wendy.
17:05The way you two are coming.
17:07Wendy. Wendy. The way you two were going at it, I thought you were a disco couple of the year, eh?
17:11Kind of in our house here, does it? How do you get into them?
17:14A hobby world banger, mate. Hell.
17:18Right. See him again?
17:21Aye. Aye, aye.
17:26Yes, please, love. Oh, wait your turn.
17:29Oh, we don't need to be back.
17:31And now you don't know.
17:34Maybe? It'll come back then, mate.
17:40Cobber.
17:41Sorry, sorry. It's still panicking. He's got his dancing clothes on.
17:45Come on, Barry. Left triple-A fantastic, eh? Slow on the rat.
17:48That's all I've done.
18:04When your body say you wanna die
18:08Living on a wild-a-loon
18:12Looking at another man
18:14Where's Wendy? Where do you come?
18:17I've been doing the Vic.
18:19Oh, just now, Mary's.
18:21She waited nearly two hours for you, man.
18:23Aye, why? Who's that she's with?
18:25Don't ask me.
18:27Well, is she with you or is she with him?
18:29She came in with us, ma'am.
18:39So, er, what do you do like, Wendy?
18:43Me? Oh, I work at the brewery, you know.
18:45Oh. Have you worked, that?
18:47Well, you're in the office.
18:49I've been doing the Vic.
18:50Well, you can go back there as far as I'm concerned.
18:51Who's this?
18:52Brendan.
18:53Alright.
18:54Alright.
18:55No, I'm not Harriet.
18:56Harriet?
18:57What are you doing here? Tamp my bird up.
18:58You what?
18:59Martin, don't be so predictable, man.
19:00Keep worrying this. It doesn't concern you.
19:02If it doesn't concern me, what are you doing here?
19:04Making a nuisance out of yourself?
19:06Come on.
19:07Martin, you're hurting this.
19:08It's hurting me.
19:09You're hurting me.
19:10You're hurting me.
19:11You're hurting me.
19:12You're hurting me.
19:13You're hurting me.
19:14You're hurting me.
19:15You're hurting me.
19:16You're hurting me.
19:17You're hurting me.
19:18You're hurting me.
19:19Hey, there's no need for that, pal.
19:21Pal.
19:22I'm not your pal.
19:24Pal.
19:25You're what?
19:26Piss.
19:27Hey, do you own this place or summons?
19:29Come on.
19:32Come on.
19:33Come on.
19:34Keep behaving yourself, will you?
19:35You bloody lunatic.
19:36Let's get it to the fuck door, man.
19:38What are you doing here?
19:40You people as well, eh?
19:42Hey, where were you last night, eh?
20:00Your bed's not been slept in.
20:02I was worried sick.
20:03Ah!
20:04There he is.
20:05There he is.
20:06They're stuck with me.
20:07I'm not sure a bit, isn't he?
20:08Don't.
20:09Hey.
20:10We watched.
20:11I told you I didn't go.
20:12Yeah?
20:13Nothing ever made about me.
20:14Norma told me all about you luck last night.
20:16And I'll tell me if I find myself.
20:18Oh, come dude, man.
20:19Anybody got arrested.
20:21That copper was a bit peeved about having a table full of Bacardi and coke down his vest
20:25shirt, but he's no cause for all the thing.
20:27What do you have to go and pick a fight with a copper for?
20:29We didn't pick a fight with a copper at all.
20:31We had to create a diversion so Moxie could piss off.
20:34Where's Moxie now, Lee?
20:36He's gone.
20:37Gone.
20:38Where?
20:39Where?
20:40I don't know.
20:41Where?
20:42I don't know.
20:43Where?
20:44I don't know.
20:45I went to him last night.
20:46He was sitting on the doorstep.
20:47So I let him in.
20:48We went to dus.
20:49And then I got up this morning.
20:52There he was.
20:53Gone.
20:54Yeah.
20:55Another one of his dawn departures.
20:56Aye.
20:57I suppose we should be used to it by now.
20:59He left a thank you note from me mother, which I thought was very civil.
21:03Me floaters like what I didn't suppose to be open that time of the morning.
21:07Well, he's for the best.
21:09He made him realise what a precarious position he's in.
21:12Made it to him a favour.
21:14Tuck.
21:15Didn't day me, ain't he?
21:16I would have been right up that boy lad's tubes.
21:19Mmm.
21:20What about that last dumpling?
21:21Be my guess, sir.
21:22Right.
21:23Oh.
21:24Hopefully I know.
21:25Not too greasy.
21:26Right.
21:27And this spicy beef is well tasty, Barry.
21:28You ordered well, son.
21:29Thank you, Wayne.
21:30I'm very into Oriental cuisine, you see, Wayne.
21:31Just outside Wolverhampton, there is the most wonderful place.
21:37Shanghai Rondeville, it's called.
21:38Oh, it's quite busty, mate.
21:39It's a great favourite of those of the moment, actually.
21:40But that is Setsuong, cuisine.
21:41A bit spicier than Cantonese, you see.
21:42Mind you, I suppose Setsuong's reached up here yet, though, is he?
21:43Wolverhampton 1, Newcastle 0.
21:44Oh, yeah, he's a really good idea, this one.
21:45Because, you know, he's a really good idea, this one.
21:46It's a really good idea, this one.
21:47Because, you know, I suppose Setsuong's reached up here yet, though, is he?
21:48I suppose Setsuong's reached up here yet, though, is he?
21:49Overhampton 1, Newcastle 0.
21:50Oh, yeah, he's a really good idea, this one.
21:51Because won't we get much Chinese to go back in the Spaniel, will we?
21:52If we ever get there, mate, eh?
21:53Oh.
21:54Oh.
21:55Oh.
21:56Oh.
21:57Oh.
21:58Oh.
21:59Oh.
22:00Oh.
22:01Oh.
22:02Oh.
22:03Oh.
22:04Oh.
22:05Oh.
22:06Oh.
22:07Oh.
22:08Oh.
22:09Oh.
22:10Oh.
22:11Oh.
22:12Oh.
22:13Oh.
22:14Oh.
22:15Oh.
22:16Oh.
22:17Oh.
22:18Oh.
22:19Oh.
22:20It was good for this food mine, though.
22:21When Hazel and me got out there, it was probably shepherd's pie and fish and chips, huh?
22:25Yeah.
22:26Hey.
22:27How are things going with you and your Hazel?
22:31Well.
22:32That's a bit old to tell from this distance.
22:36Neville said they'll, why don't they bring it out like?
22:39You know.
22:40Might make all the difference, he said.
22:41Watch out.
22:42Watch out.
22:43You know what Neville's doing?
22:44Neville's promised Brenda a free trip, mate.
22:46So he's lobbying all the lads to get their old ladies out there so he don't feel like the
22:50I'm thinking about it though, a change of scene might do the chick with ice.
22:59Not with them Ludicris Bermudas you bought, mate.
23:02No, no, they look quite nice to me, Alexa Brown.
23:05Two more lagers, two more lagers, please, squire.
23:13Oh.
23:14Here, why don't you bring Christa out? You don't see much of her reason, Olivia?
23:19She's in Germany, aren't she?
23:21Well, don't stop her flying out, does it?
23:23She wouldn't like it, man.
23:24Why not, mate? I mean, I can imagine why I've not wanted her join us in Dusseldorf when we're working out there.
23:30But, I mean, Spain's a different kettle of fish, isn't it?
23:34And if I were there with other couples like...
23:37like Jo and Christa and Neville and Brenda,
23:40I might see things in a different light.
23:43What do you think, Wayne?
23:45Look, stop asking me what I think, will you, Barry?
23:48Ever since I've known you, you've asked my advice on everything about love, sex and marriage.
23:53Yeah, well, it's surprising, isn't it?
23:56I mean, I don't profess to be an expert in that department.
23:59You've really forgotten more about women than I've got to learn.
24:03Yeah, well, I know nothing about wives, do I?
24:07Otherwise, mine wouldn't have left me.
24:10I mean, I've never told no one.
24:11I told you or Hazel.
24:12Did you?
24:13She never let on.
24:14That's why I told her, Barry.
24:16I told Brenda as well a couple of nights ago.
24:19I didn't want to tell the lads because, I don't know,
24:21probably my image.
24:22I just thought, what's the point?
24:23You can do me a favour.
24:24Tell the lads, but tell them I don't want to talk about it, all right?
24:25Right.
24:26Right.
24:27Right.
24:28Right.
24:29Right.
24:30Do you think it was something to do with all your family?
24:31Barry, did you hear me?
24:32It's the end of the conversation.
24:33I don't know.
24:34I don't know.
24:35I don't know.
24:36That's why I told her, Barry.
24:37I told Brenda as well a couple of nights ago.
24:38I didn't want to tell the lads because, I don't know, probably my image.
24:40I just thought, what's the point?
24:41You can do me a favour.
24:42Tell the lads, but tell them I don't want to talk about it, all right?
24:45Right.
24:46Right.
24:47Right.
24:48Do you think it was something to do with all your family?
24:53Barry, did you hear me?
24:55It's the end of the conversation.
24:57Closed book.
25:01You're the prince of trivia.
25:02You think it was something to talk about.
25:11Do you want that last prawn ball?
25:25Oh, this is where I like to keep myself in shape.
25:31Oh, Boston.
25:32Oh, look at these.
25:34Do you work out every daily?
25:35I like to, yes.
25:37Two or three times a week I've got this wee Danish bit comes in.
25:42Gives me a workout.
25:43And it soon gets the kinks out, I can turn it.
25:47Mr Fry, how does this contraption work, actually?
25:50Oh, well, Barry, you just start it on the start button here,
25:53and then you just set it to whatever speed that you like.
25:57Oh, that's bustin' this, isn't it?
26:00It's like sort of jogging we've had of a leave in the house.
26:03Very therapeutic, I reckon.
26:05And then you've got your sauna through here,
26:07and then your swimming pool right out the back.
26:09Great.
26:10You've got to swim and pool up here.
26:12It'll be about as much good as a chocolate for you, God.
26:15I like to do 20 lengths a day, whatever the weather.
26:22Sir, is this where you get your suntan, Ali?
26:25Aha, yes, yes, but of course you lads will be getting a load of that
26:27when we get over to Spain.
26:28So come on, let's move out of here, let's freshen up our drinks.
26:30Come on, boys.
26:38What do you do, you lads?
26:40It's all right, Maria. I'll get it.
26:57Hello, Dennis Peck. Come in.
26:58Thanks.
27:02I don't think you've met, have you? This is Christine Chadwick. This is Viggy.
27:05Yes, it was a long time though. Where was it?
27:07I used to have my hair done at Maison Andre and you were the manicurist.
27:10Yeah, that's right. You're looking lovely, pet.
27:12Come on through, we're just in here.
27:18Nice.
27:19Nice.
27:20So I hear there was a wee spot of bother at the club last night, doesn't it?
27:23Oh, just some young crackerjack who haven't jumped in out the lake with drinking them.
27:28Mm-hmm.
27:29He's brought the tart, I see.
27:30What do you know, then?
27:31Seen her?
27:32I reckon she's the reason he didn't come home last night.
27:33Oh, yeah.
27:34Ha!
27:35He's brought the tart, I see.
27:36What do you know, then?
27:37Seen her?
27:38I reckon she's the reason he didn't come home last night.
27:39Oh, yeah.
27:40I think he nearly had a very bad...
27:41What's that, didn't he?
27:42I've no idea.
27:43Well, it must say she does look a very attractive young lady, eh?
27:45It could be a different...
27:46Yeah.
27:47He doesn't know how to pick them, doesn't he, out in his side?
27:49He has a terrible punch on them for the upmarket line, isn't he?
27:50No, I'm not.
27:51I'm not.
27:52I'm not.
27:53I'm not.
27:54I'm not.
27:55I'm not.
27:56I'm not.
27:57I'm not.
27:58I'm not.
27:59I'm not.
28:00I'm not.
28:01I'm not.
28:02I'm not.
28:03I'm not.
28:04I'm not.
28:05I'm not.
28:06I'm not.
28:07I'm not.
28:08A little punch on them for the upmarket line, isn't I?
28:10Yeah, well, he didn't tell me he was bringing one of them to this do.
28:13Oh, Christine!
28:16Or is it Chris?
28:18I don't really mind, Mr Fraser.
28:20Oh, come on, Ali, love Ali.
28:21What is all this Mr Fraser?
28:23Come on, let's get a lemonade down here.
28:25How are you, then, eh?
28:27Very well.
28:28Can I have a word with you, Dennis?
28:30Yeah?
28:31You brought the lass along.
28:33So?
28:34Well, last night you said it was just the lads.
28:36You said specifically no wives.
28:39Well, she's not me wife.
28:40Oh, very funny, Dennis.
28:42Look, I could have brought Brenda along.
28:44She wanted to come, you know.
28:45Yeah, yeah, I know.
28:46I'm sorry, mate.
28:47I just forgot, you know.
28:48Well, what's she gonna say when she hears there was women here?
28:50Well, ring her up, tell her to get a cab, eh?
28:53Where's she gonna get a babysitter this time of night?
28:55Oh, never, man.
28:56Didn't give me a hard time.
28:57Everybody's on my back, man.
28:58Just give us a night off, will you?
29:00Hey, hey.
29:01Let me do that, love.
29:02Oh, thanks.
29:03I'm about to tear a nail.
29:04Yeah.
29:05My name's Wayne.
29:06Vicky.
29:07You, er...
29:08You got to Spain then, Vicky?
29:09Oh, yeah.
29:10We've just got back, actually.
29:11It's like my second home, really.
29:12You get lots of tourists there, do you?
29:13Well, in the season it's packed, but where we are, we don't get, like, well, the common
29:15ones, you know.
29:16Hmm?
29:17Well, you won't be seeing much of me then, will you, eh?
29:18Didn't mean that.
29:19Very well, now that we're all gathered, I'd like just to say a few words.
29:23Er, why don't I show you the house, Chris?
29:24Hmm.
29:25All right.
29:26Great.
29:27Great.
29:28Great.
29:45Right.
29:46I'm sorry that you lads have been farted around a bit, but, er, these things happen.
29:51Unexpected contingencies.
29:52However, I'm very, very pleased to say that everything has now been sorted out, and you
29:56fly out there on Saturday.
29:58Whoa.
29:59Is that from here, or from Heathrow?
30:00Er, that is from here, Dennis.
30:02Saturday, 13.45.
30:03They don't do scheduled flights from here on Saturday.
30:06Ah, well, it's not a scheduled flight as such, Dennis.
30:08It's more what you might say, our own luxury personal charter.
30:12What?
30:13We're on plane?
30:14Oh, I'm up for that other bricklayer special.
30:15Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha.
30:16Haven't he quite gone that far, Oz.
30:17No, no, no.
30:18Now, a pal of mine's got a wee company.
30:20He's taken a tour down there, and he very, very happily happens to have some spare seats.
30:24Oh, Christ.
30:25Economy measures already.
30:26I'm eating an animal disly.
30:27Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
30:28There's more to it than that if you'll just bear me out, Oz.
30:31Now, officially, you lads are not going out there to work because, as you know, I could
30:37not come across with the work permits, and I want you out there because I trust the British
30:42working man.
30:43Very patriotic.
30:44Well, I think if one is in a position to help the working man at the present moment
30:47in time, then one should do it.
30:48I'm also not particularly keen on my Spanish workers because when I'm out there, it's
30:52mañana, mañana, and when I'm not out there, it's siesta, siesta.
30:57Yes, they do tend to indolence, don't they, the average Spaniard?
31:02Mind you, now that they've joined the European community, you might find that there's a marked
31:07difference in their attitude.
31:09All I am saying, Barry, is that officially we are going there as holidaymakers, and arriving
31:16in a chartered flight will help to reinforce that impression.
31:19Now, do yous get my drift?
31:20Oh, aye, aye, aye.
31:21So it's buckets and spears and watterwings is the order of the day, is it?
31:24That's right, and you turn up for working your swimming cosy, eh?
31:27Now, you give her a few pesetas for your walking around money, and your official money will
31:30be paid as per usual, as per Dennis, as per back here.
31:34Oh, still staying at the Hotel Miramar?
31:37Ah, well, unhappily, Dennis, they were unable to take you.
31:40The lads are fed up with barric room conditions right in Jarvis show, living like derelicts,
31:43man.
31:44It's all been taken care of, Dennis.
31:45You will be staying in the same hotel as the rest of the holidaymakers.
31:48A very, very charming spot, and only a stone's throw from the beach.
31:51Oh, aye.
31:52Well, the Spaniards is famous for how far they can hold your stone, aren't they?
31:55And they're also famous for how bad they can lay a brick, and that is why we are setting
31:58off to sunnier clime.
31:59So until then, my dear friends, hasta la vista, and vayas condes, mi amigas.
32:05Okay, who's for a game of pool?
32:06Oh, I'm up for that, Leigh.
32:08Aye, I'll have again.
32:09Shall we take him on, Mr Fraser?
32:10Oh, Ali Bommer, call me Alistair.
32:13Nev, you and me take the windows on, eh?
32:15Hang on a minute.
32:16I'll give you a bomb.
32:17Yeah?
32:18Listen, if it's a charter fleet, it'll not be that expensive, will it?
32:20We could probably afford to take the wives.
32:22Do you fancy taking yours?
32:23Oh, I don't know, Neville.
32:24She's got her hands tight looking after all our kids.
32:27So, I use Bommer rather fancy to get in amongst those senoritas.
32:37Ah, good evening, my friend.
32:39Can I get you a drink, more amigos?
32:41Anything.
32:42It's all right, isn't it, eh?
32:44Oh, yeah, yeah.
32:46Right.
32:47You know, I could go across some two evenings like this, Neville.
32:50Hazel and I have often talked about putting in a bar on our room downstairs.
32:53The room, if you remember, you know, right by the bay.
32:55I mean, nothing as grand as this, of course,
32:57but just something that's big enough for me to get behind.
33:00Hang on.
33:01Hey, listen.
33:02Have you had a word with Hazel yet, about gun for Spain?
33:05Yes, yes, I have, actually.
33:07She seems quite keen.
33:09But, er, she's in the position of great responsibility, Neville.
33:12I mean, she can't just drop everything in her job like that and come straight out, you know?
33:16No, no, but it's still a possibility, is it?
33:19Yeah, yeah.
33:20I think so, yeah.
33:22Well, I thought I'd best get out there myself and see the line of land, you know.
33:29What about you, Wayne?
33:31What about Wayne what?
33:33Any chance of you asking Christo to spin?
33:36Haven't you told them yet?
33:40No, I haven't, actually, no.
33:42Well, I haven't had time.
33:43I haven't seen sight in the sand enough since I last come flat.
33:46What's this?
33:47Well, now's your chance, eh?
33:50Hello.
33:51This might come as a bit of a shock to you, mate.
33:56How long have you known Dennis, then?
33:58Oh, about a year, off and on.
34:00When I was doing your nails, weren't you going through a divorce?
34:03Why?
34:04Was I biting them a lot?
34:06No, I just thought you'd mentioned it, that's all.
34:09It's all behind me now.
34:10Dennis is divorced, isn't he?
34:12Yeah.
34:13Is Ali?
34:14Well, not technically.
34:16She wouldn't hear of it.
34:18She's a staunch Catholic, you know.
34:20And she's not going to give up the money either.
34:22Does that bother you?
34:23Oh, no.
34:24I mean, marriage is just a bit of paper these days, isn't it?
34:28Perhaps.
34:29Well, listen, it's been lovely talking to your pet after all this time.
34:32You know, you should come out to Spain.
34:34We'll have a good laugh out there.
34:36And I get really bored when he's on the golf course all day.
34:39Well, anyway, I'll have to go.
34:40See you later.
34:46Get a jammy one to us there, bummer.
34:48All right, all right.
34:49To your lead dears.
34:50We're making the best of 17.
34:52Rack him up.
34:53You rack him and I'll smack him.
34:57I'm off, Ali.
34:58I'm going to meet Karen down the club.
35:00Ah, lovely.
35:01OK.
35:02See you later, lads.
35:03Aye, throw.
35:04Lady Boiler?
35:09Let's face it, he's had it coming to him, hasn't he?
35:12Yeah, I think he knows that.
35:14He never leaves it alone, does he?
35:16He must have slept with half at Dusseldorf before he met Krista.
35:21I think the experience may have changed the machine there, right?
35:24Added to the fact that he's been around people like you and me,
35:27it's bound to have a stabilising influence, isn't it?
35:30I don't think I've got any influence on Wayne.
35:33I think he thinks I'm dull.
35:35No.
35:36Mature would be my word for it, actually, then.
35:44All right.
35:45Hello?
35:46Hello?
35:47Hello.
36:15Going out, are we?
36:16Yeah, I'm going down to Cannabels. It's this club that Ali owns.
36:20Yeah, that's right. We were all there last night.
36:22Well, do you want to come down tonight? I could leave your name at the door.
36:26Do you mean me? Or all of us?
36:28Well, why, like, do you always do everything as a group?
36:30Oh, no, no, no, no. I'll do loads of things on me own.
36:36Mind you, it might be a bit off tonight, eh?
36:38Cos I am Ali's guest, don't I?
36:40Oh, well, suit yourself.
36:43Maybe we could leave it to Spain, eh?
36:46Leave what?
36:48Bit of dancing or something.
36:50Well, we'll have to see about that, won't we?
36:53Mm.
36:54Mm.
37:11That's mine.
37:12Lovely moment, Scott.
37:15I didn't mean the car.
37:20What do you think I should do about Christine, Norma?
37:23I'm amazed you've even asked her.
37:25No, no, she brought it up, actually.
37:28Said she had some holiday due.
37:30She'd love to come.
37:32Well, I agreed at the time.
37:34Had a few, like, you know.
37:36Sue, I was feeling fairly mellow.
37:39I don't know what you're so worried about.
37:41She's a lovely lass.
37:43She fancies going to Spain with you.
37:45I think you should be flattered.
37:46Oh, no, no.
37:47It's not that.
37:48It's just...
37:49Well, in the cold light of day,
37:51I'm not sure I had such a good idea, you know.
37:53What will Ali be in there?
37:55All the lads.
37:56It's not the lads that's given you cold feet.
37:58It's you.
38:01How do you mean?
38:03You don't just build walls at work, Dennis.
38:07You build them round yourself.
38:09You're scared of facing your own feelings.
38:13Well, me track record's not too good in that department, is it?
38:16Oh, get away.
38:18Take her with you, man.
38:20You've been sitting on the fence for ages with this lass.
38:23Maybe this'll force the issue.
38:25What's the worst that could happen?
38:27You could find you're not compatible.
38:29On the other hand, you could have a bloody good time
38:31and you should have a bit of fun.
38:35You should write one of those agony columns, you know, Norma.
38:40I care about you, Matt.
38:42I worry meself sick sometimes about what's happening to you.
38:46Anyway, Frank's due back from the gulf in two months' time.
38:50Oh, I see, aye.
38:51I want my house to meself.
38:53Aye.
38:56Oh, go on, get that.
38:57It's probably for you anyway.
39:01PHONE RINGS
39:03Hello.
39:05Hello?
39:06Hello, Dan.
39:07Moxie?
39:08Where are you?
39:09Long way from you, mate.
39:11There's no need to be so evasive, man.
39:12I haven't put a tap on the phone yet, you know.
39:15Did...
39:16Did the Spanish number come up?
39:18Yeah, aye, we're leaving on Saturday.
39:20OK.
39:21Hang on.
39:22Cheers, Dan.
39:40So?
39:42The job's on, apparently.
39:44Passport's not easy.
39:45I mean, we're talking about real money.
39:47Yeah, don't worry about that.
39:48Got a bit put aside.
39:50Eh, you know those false ID papers you got us?
39:52Yeah.
39:53Yeah, well, I won't be needing them where I'm going.
39:55Do you consider part exchange?
39:58Check-in time's no later than 12.15.
40:00Aye.
40:02Reservations have been made for the wives who are going,
40:03but you'll pick those up at the airport.
40:05Great deal.
40:06For which retribution will be made in due course to use thoroughly.
40:09Yeah, well, I didn't expect it to be hard no freebies, Lake.
40:12You know what I mean?
40:13Dennis!
40:14Come here.
40:18Yeah?
40:19Pamela tells me there's only six tickets.
40:21Well, one of the lads had to drop out.
40:23Yeah, well, that leaves you shorthanded, doesn't it?
40:24That's all right.
40:25No, it is not all right.
40:26I want this job done in three weeks,
40:28and then you're back in that plane.
40:29I'm already worried about Waves and Wayne's going out there.
40:30Well, that won't affect the work.
40:32Course it will.
40:33You know what it's like.
40:34I thought you'd be back at six o'clock.
40:35I thought you were coming back to take me snorkeling.
40:37I guarantee you the job will be done, all right?
40:38Take somebody else, make up the numbers.
40:39Right, if you insist.
40:40I'll go and own the job centre then, eh?
40:42Oh, no, no, Dennis!
40:43Dennis, Dennis, don't be daft.
40:44No, no, no, no.
40:45I know a young lad.
40:46He's in your trade.
40:47Very good worker.
40:48And I know that he's skint
40:49because he's lost a wee fortune in one of my casinos.
40:51Well, as long as you can graft.
40:52Sure he can.
40:53Right, me and the lads,
40:54we're having a farewell drink down to Portland night.
40:55Eight o'clock.
40:56Tell him to be there.
40:57Lovely.
40:58OK.
40:59Oh, and Dennis,
41:00don't bring them back to cannibals afterwards, will you?
41:03Look, did you ever drink more coffee?
41:06There you go, lads.
41:08Right, look.
41:09After all the delays,
41:10it looks like we're off to Spain tomorrow,
41:11so let's have a monumental piss-up, eh?
41:13Well, hang on, hang on.
41:14Should we not wait till the women get here, eh?
41:17I think Brenda will be on her way of doing this shit.
41:19Look,
41:20I won't be looking to make her life a misery out there, Oz.
41:23Oh, man, I'm harsh.
41:24Well, I tell you what,
41:25you're not being a ruin
41:26because I'm bringing Christine with me.
41:28Are you?
41:29It's like a bugger pattern.
41:30Fantastic.
41:31That's great, man.
41:32I'll get it, I'll get it straight down now.
41:33Oh, yeah.
41:34Top of the bill, that champion.
41:35This new job, I drags you to talk,
41:37I won't be able to start a formation dance team.
41:39Look, lads, I promise you,
41:40tonight is an all-male evening, right,
41:42of alcoholic abuse.
41:43If we can have an evening celebration and depravity,
41:46we've got to chose something better than this man in the place,
41:48can't we?
41:49We're only starting off here, man, aren't we?
41:51Meeting this other lad,
41:52we're in the disco.
41:53Oh, yeah, yeah,
41:54well, not if Oz and Bob would get on the bloody snoker time,
41:55we wouldn't be here till carding time.
41:57Oh, no fear.
41:58Bob wants to go dance.
41:59Nah, we're not going to cannibals.
42:01That's fine by me.
42:02I hate those small frenzied disco.
42:04Whatever happened to the pallet, eh?
42:06Big band.
42:07The sounds of saxophones echoing through the rafters.
42:10Oh, yeah.
42:11I once took tap dancing lessons, you know.
42:14You did?
42:15Why?
42:16Why?
42:17Well, why?
42:19Why?
42:20Why?
42:21Well, I've seen all those wonderful films with Fred Astaire,
42:26Ginger Rogers, Donald O'Connor, wonderful dancers, people like that.
42:30Lovely.
42:31I wanted to emulate them.
42:32Anyway, me auntie was a teacher, so I got the rebate on the lessons.
42:36Come on, then.
42:37Do your bit.
42:38Aye, how are you?
42:39How are you?
42:40How are you, Fred?
42:41How are you?
42:42How was the air dance, Fred?
42:43No.
42:44I've got the right sort of shoes.
42:45How are you?
42:46On the floor.
42:47No.
42:48It's the wrong sort of floor.
42:49Look, just do one little bit.
42:50You don't have to buy a drink all night.
42:51Aye, how are you?
42:52That's great.
42:53Okay.
42:54Go on, Fred.
42:55How was the air dance, Fred?
42:56What a routine.
42:57No, hold on.
42:58Hold on.
42:59I've got a good idea.
43:00Here.
43:01Come on, I'll buy the dartboard, you see?
43:02They must have put the spot on you.
43:04They have it.
43:07It's been a long time, you know.
43:08Oh, very very, man.
43:09Very.
43:10Right.
43:11Great.
43:12Off you again.
43:14Right, er...
43:16You've got to remember that this is to the tune of Keep Young and Beautiful, all right?
43:21Great.
43:22Right.
43:23Feet, don't you fail me now, all right?
43:26And...
43:28Keep young and beautiful
43:33If you're joking to be beautiful
43:36Keep young and beautiful
43:39If you wanna be beautiful
43:45He's coming back
43:51Ah, eh, eh, it's coming back
43:53If you wanna be beautiful
43:54Keep young and beautiful
43:56If you wanna be
43:58If you wanna be
43:59If you wanna be love
44:01Oh!
44:02Yay!
44:032, 2.5.5.2
44:05And the trophy won't be going over half this year!
44:07That's yeah!
44:14And it's your road.
44:16He's funny, that there.
44:18Oh, look, what's his crowd up against the bar there?
44:20Who's that?
44:22See him? That chum I would cause all of bother.
44:24They'd just go the other knee.
44:26Seriously? You reckon he's come looking for us?
44:28Oh, suits me, don't they?
44:30Look, knuckle on the head, right? We're all on a plate tomorrow.
44:32Wouldn't want any bother.
44:33Listen, will somebody tell me what's going on?
44:36What do you want? Eh?
44:38You come looking for us you're doing?
44:40I'll give you ten out of ten for a bottle, son.
44:43I don't want any trouble, look.
44:45Anyway, I'm not looking for you.
44:46Are you not?
44:47Well, I suggest you piss up and find another watering hole,
44:49cos after I've had a few more of them,
44:51I might just be tempted to pull the front end of your face off.
44:53You really have to be some belligerent, Oz.
44:56Look, man, if it wasn't for him, Moxie'd still be getting to Spain, remember?
44:59I'm not looking for any trouble, eh?
45:01I'm looking for a bloke called Dennis Patterson.
45:04That's me.
45:05Who are you?
45:06Martin Cooper.
45:08Mr Fraser said you might be one short for that Spanish job.
45:11HE LAUGHS
45:12He's not coming!
45:13He's not coming!
45:14I'll handle it, right?
45:15Give me gan!
45:16Shut up and sit down!
45:17Well, he's not coming!
45:18I'll handle it!
45:19Well, he's not down!
45:20Shut up!
45:22Look, if you've had some bother with these two lads,
45:24this is not going to work out now, is it?
45:26Why not?
45:27Why not?
45:28Because we're supposed to be a team, man.
45:30That's why not!
45:31I haven't got a problem.
45:33If they've got a problem, that's their problem, mate.
45:37Hey, look, I need that job, eh?
45:40I'll do me share.
45:41I'll see you at the airport.
45:45Nothing ever seems to go smoothly for us doctors.
45:51Food don't seem so good tonight, do you think, mate?
46:03There's no difference in the food, son.
46:06It's their mood that's down the crapper.
46:09Well, it's got to be said.
46:11This latest development with this Martin Gaddy,
46:13I mean, it's took the chain up, they tripped the spear by everybody, hasn't it?
46:16Of all the blokes in your castle, you'll have to pick on him.
46:19What?
46:20We've picked on a lot of people in there,
46:22so the odds aren't that outlandish.
46:24Hang on a minute, hang on a minute, hang on a minute.
46:25It wasn't me which started that bond.
46:26It was that Martin Gaddy, man, was it?
46:28Hey, hey, hey, hey.
46:29What?
46:30If you remember, the incident occurred
46:31because you tried to get into his old lady's knickers.
46:33Oh, hey, hold on.
46:34I don't think you're the one to point the finger about that, do you, eh?
46:36We've been dropping the clutch plenty of times
46:38while you're ramping, ma'am, haven't we?
46:40Eh?
46:41Oh, eh, never forget to do that, eh?
46:43Come on, lads, fair's fair.
46:44That Martin's a born headbanger.
46:45And I can't say I fancy working alongside him.
46:47Well, that's me.
46:50Oh.
46:51Hi, Moxie.
46:52Oh, mate.
46:53How you been?
46:54I called round your house then
46:55and your sister said you were all in here.
46:57Come in, Jason.
46:58All right, get down, get down.
47:00Yeah, before I do, though,
47:02there's just a couple of things I'd like to say, you know.
47:04Eh, I've got me passport sorted out, you know,
47:07so I go to Spain, there's no problem there.
47:09Fantastic.
47:10Good luck.
47:11But, eh, well, I know of course you lot,
47:13a lot of aggravation, you know,
47:14with all this ducking and diving and that,
47:16where, well, well, if you don't want us to go,
47:18you know, I'll understand
47:19and there'll be no hard feelings.
47:21No!
47:22Get this man of drink.
47:23He's the guest of honour.
47:24There you are.
47:25The guest of honour?
47:26He's the man of the earth, for that one,
47:27soon another one of you.
47:28Well, why?
47:29What have I done?
47:30You've turned up, Sam Beam.
47:31That's what you've done.
47:32You should have let it show that Martin fellow
47:33and did it really forget it.
47:34I will, I will.
47:35The magnificent seven rides again!
47:37Yeah!
47:38You came in the nick of time, my son.
47:40I'm made up.
47:41I mean, you lot don't exactly owe me any favours.
47:43Joe, it's done us a favour, man.
47:45A toast!
47:46To Moxie!
47:47Moxie!
47:48Great to have you back, sir.
47:49Cheers.
47:50What is your Brendan?
47:51It's Francis Fogarty.
47:55It's what?
47:56Francis Fogarty.
47:57Francis Fogarty?
47:58I don't believe it.
48:00Where...
48:01Where'd you get Francis Fogarty from?
48:04Well, it wasn't my idea, you know.
48:06If it was up to me, I'd like to be called Derek.
48:08But no Derek died in Kilbane on Tuesday.
48:18Now, Mr Paterson?
48:19Yeah?
48:20Party of ten for Swallow Tools.
48:21Are you all here?
48:22Yeah.
48:23I will let me have your tickets and your passports.
48:25We'll get you checked through.
48:28We're going to have a payboy if you'll never.
48:30I wouldn't give them that.
48:31It's disgusting.
48:33That's smart.
48:34We're going to have that after you.
48:35Yeah, sir.
48:36Listen, it passes down the nursing room,
48:37because it's a really good article about signings for the game for you, isn't it?
48:40We'll definitely have that after you.
48:41I'm going to have that.
48:47You know, I think it's very noble of your day,
48:49to bring you and your mum along, you know,
48:51because it'll keep him out of mischief.
48:52Listen, listen.
48:53Do you know why?
48:54Because we're going to be sampling all that pulchitude down there.
48:58There'll not be that much of that, man.
49:00Tourist season's well finished.
49:01That'll be enough, don't you, Woody?
49:03Anyway, we'll have a bit of luck
49:05we'll have sorted something to do before we land.
49:07Yeah, yeah.
49:08Are you trying to tell me, right,
49:09that on this charter tour,
49:10there ain't going to be a surplus of sales goals,
49:12secretaries, hairdressers, they're like, eh?
49:15I'll tell you what, we're going to be well locked off
49:16before we've even landed, sir.
49:18Check in over here, Mr Paterson.
49:24Hold on, what's all this like, then?
49:28Oh, it's the Spenny Mooran District Senior Citizen Society.
49:31They go every year.
49:33And you were lucky to get those seats.
49:35I wouldn't waste any time, Wayne.
49:37I'd steam in now.
49:39Get it all locked off, son.
49:41Yes, it started a while ago
49:56Just strangers thrown together
50:00Helpless heroes caught in a dream
50:03Boy, we made such a crazy team
50:07Out of luck and out on a limb
50:10We saw each other three
50:13We laughed it off
50:16But, ma'am, we shared a few
50:18Back with the boys again
50:22Back with the boys again
50:27Back with the boys again
50:36Once for all
50:37And all for anyone
50:39Long as they played the game
50:42Sharing chances
50:44And taking all the blame
50:46Back with the boys again
50:50Oh, we're back
50:55Back with the boys again
51:00Yeah, we're back
51:01Back with the boys again
51:07You
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