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This episode is part of Taskmaster Season 20. Taskmaster is a popular comedy game show where comedians compete in absurd challenges.
taskmaster comedy game-show challenges comedians full-episode streaming watch-online
#FullEpisode #Streaming #Taskmaster #Comedy
taskmaster comedy game-show challenges comedians full-episode streaming watch-online
#FullEpisode #Streaming #Taskmaster #Comedy
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00:00Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
00:30Welcome, welcome to Taskmaster, a group of comics battling out to see who is the least worst at doing a thing.
00:43No one will learn anything from the next hour, so crack open a can and give in to the pointlessness.
00:49Here are the names of our giggling gladiators.
00:51And next to me, a man who told them he never struggles to get back to sleep after the alarm goes off,
01:10he simply has to listen to one of his wife's descriptions of a dream she had.
01:14As he put it himself, they're so boring, I soon be snoring.
01:20It's...
01:21Little Ellerton!
01:23CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
01:25Hello.
01:27Hey, Craig.
01:28I've got you a present.
01:30Yeah?
01:30I don't think you'll like it.
01:31It's a working mind-reading machine.
01:35You want to give it a go?
01:36Yeah.
01:37LAUGHTER
01:38I mean, honestly, that's one of the coolest things I think I've ever seen.
01:42Ooh!
01:42LAUGHTER
01:43LAUGHTER
01:44It was quite good!
01:46It was!
01:47Is the more...
01:48You are my best friend.
01:50Ooh!
01:51That was a bad edit, wasn't it?
01:53LAUGHTER
01:54You are my best friend!
01:56Ooh!
01:56You really mean it.
01:59This is the best section...
02:00This is the best chat section ever.
02:02LAUGHTER
02:02Let us begin!
02:04Yes.
02:05And I strongly suggest we start with the prize task.
02:07And the category this time is...
02:09The thing Greg would most like to see Alex wearing.
02:13LAUGHTER
02:14Oh, God.
02:15So, at the end of the show, not only will the winner take home
02:18five things Greg would like to see me wearing,
02:20but I might appear on the stage and don the outfit that wins
02:23this bit of the task.
02:25Ooh!
02:26Before I see any of them, I want to say that the things that make him
02:30look the most stupid, inconvenience him, or cause him pain,
02:34are the things that I'm likely to give high points.
02:36LAUGHTER
02:37OK.
02:38Anya.
02:39It's not constrictive, but I've brought in a versatile hat.
02:41Can I see the hat?
02:42Yeah.
02:43Here's Anya's hat.
02:44LAUGHTER
02:47That is wonderful.
02:49That, I imagine, is incredibly heavy.
02:52It's heavy, it hurts.
02:53It hurts the word.
02:54It will ruin his life.
02:56And I'll barely be able to see him and his horrible gappy mouth.
02:59LAUGHTER
03:00Obviously, it's got the sparkliness for, like, all your awards dues,
03:03and then it's black, so you can wear it to a funeral.
03:05When my heart inevitably gives in.
03:08Yeah.
03:09I'd like you to wear that to my funeral.
03:10It's a deal.
03:11LAUGHTER
03:13That's a strong opener.
03:16OK.
03:17Sanjeev.
03:18What were the... You said constrictive, er...
03:20Er, er, causes embarrassment or pain.
03:22Yeah. OK.
03:23So, if you imagine him wearing this...
03:25..in India...
03:27LAUGHTER
03:29..all those things are covered.
03:31Sanjeev's brought this in.
03:32It's a safari!
03:33LAUGHTER
03:35Oh, my God, our next night out, that.
03:40You.
03:41So full.
03:42Yeah.
03:43I would walk ten paces ahead, not for cultural reasons.
03:47LAUGHTER
03:48Just for personal safety.
03:49LAUGHTER
03:50This is wonderful.
03:51Yeah.
03:52You'll look silly in a sari, and you'll be in danger.
03:55LAUGHTER
03:56I mean, I'm excited we're having another night out.
03:58LAUGHTER
04:00Phil.
04:01It's a suit I've made,
04:03and it's covered in various things that will attract predators.
04:06LAUGHTER
04:09Yes, it is.
04:10This is what it looks like, Greg.
04:11Oh, here we go.
04:13There we are.
04:14LAUGHTER
04:15Oh, it's beyond my wildest dreams.
04:18LAUGHTER
04:19We all got some steaks there for any carnivores.
04:22Some sausages, maybe we get a cartoon fun dog chasing him.
04:25LAUGHTER
04:26And, er, and, honey,
04:28wouldn't we all like to see Winnie the Pooh attached to his back,
04:31clawing away then?
04:32LAUGHTER
04:32Wouldn't we?
04:33With his little T-shirt on, nothing below the west.
04:36Lovely.
04:37The rest blowing in the wind.
04:38Why Winnie and not one of the bad bears?
04:40Winnie behind closed doors is a real piece of shit.
04:42LAUGHTER
04:45I absolutely love it.
04:47Thank you.
04:48Maisie, have you got something that will humiliate my friend?
04:51The late Lady Diana's revenge dress.
04:53LAUGHTER
04:55APPLAUSE
04:57LAUGHTER
04:59You mean this one?
05:01That's the one!
05:02LAUGHTER
05:03It's off-the-shoulder, form-fitting with an asymmetrical hemline
05:06and chiffon train.
05:08Cleavage-bearing, a departure from typical royal attire, of course.
05:11Yeah, yeah, yeah.
05:12It was, apparently, a statement of defiance
05:14and a powerful symbol of reclaiming her narrative.
05:16There you go!
05:17It was soon after finding out about the divorce, I think, wasn't it?
05:19Yeah.
05:20And I've often heard you say, backstage, there's three people in this marriage.
05:25LAUGHTER
05:26God, these are all strong.
05:28Reece.
05:29Reece?
05:30You have mentioned sometimes, haven't you, Greg, that you used to be a teacher?
05:33Yes.
05:34I may have got a bit of material out of it.
05:37Yes.
05:38I presume when you were teaching, if someone was hard of thinking,
05:41they would be given the dunce's cap.
05:43So I thought, what's the next best thing?
05:45It's basically a hat with a propeller on it.
05:47LAUGHTER
05:49This is the hat.
05:50Let's have a look.
05:51LAUGHTER
05:52I think that... I think that should win.
05:54That is...
05:54Oh!
05:55LAUGHTER
05:57What a nightmare!
05:58Can I... Can I say, the reason I find it hard to score that highly
06:01is because he, and I mean this, would genuinely wear that out of choice.
06:05LAUGHTER
06:06I've miscalculated them.
06:08Yeah, it would appear so.
06:09LAUGHTER
06:11I like all of them.
06:12I'm going to do something that will annoy you.
06:13LAUGHTER
06:15OK?
06:16I'm not going to give anyone one point.
06:17LAUGHTER
06:18I'm going to give Reece Shearsmith two points...
06:21Yes. ..for that hat, just because I'm in a good mood.
06:24I'm going to give hat number two, that Anya brought in, three points.
06:28Right. Because I liked it, but I think part of Alex would like that too.
06:32Four points for Asari.
06:34OK, one on Sanjeev, four points.
06:35Yeah.
06:36And then we're up into the big guns.
06:38LAUGHTER
06:39It's so difficult for me between meat and Diana.
06:43LAUGHTER
06:44I'm going to give five points to the late Lady Diana dress
06:48and the meat outfit.
06:49That's how I'm going to play.
06:50OK, five to Mate and five to four.
06:52CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
06:54I have to ask, what should I wear at the end of the show?
06:57I tell you what, you put the dress on, I'll throw meat at you from day.
07:00LAUGHTER
07:02Yeah.
07:03Looks like we got ourselves a shoal!
07:05LAUGHTER
07:07Let's have a tusk proper.
07:11Let's see the extraordinary power of one little snip.
07:15I thought you were going to be sat there.
07:29Hello.
07:30May I?
07:31Please do.
07:32A envelope, a cushion, string and a gorgeous set of scissors.
07:36Would you like me to open the task?
07:37Yeah, OK.
07:38Yeah.
07:39Can I use the scissors?
07:40Yeah.
07:41Cut a single string to cause the greatest effect.
07:48You have 20 minutes.
07:50Your time starts now.
07:52Greatest effect is pretty broad.
07:54It's two bloody broads.
07:55Oh, right.
07:56That's subjective, isn't it?
07:58Yes, some of these tasks are.
08:00Yeah.
08:01I think I shouldn't tell you what I'm going to do.
08:02Just do it.
08:03Might need that.
08:04Done that.
08:05It's all good stuff, isn't it?
08:07Thank you.
08:08APPLAUSE
08:12Yet again, Phil, positive.
08:17Making fun out of just having a pair of scissors in front of him.
08:20Thank you.
08:21I try to look at the bright side of life and just enjoy every second.
08:23Good.
08:24That's wonderful.
08:25He said that like the summer with a gun.
08:26LAUGHTER
08:28Alex.
08:29Greg.
08:30Shall we see some?
08:31Why not?
08:32Let's begin with Phil, short for Philip, and Anya, short for genetic reasons.
08:36Here we go.
08:37LAUGHTER
08:38I think there's one more item, if possible.
08:42Have you got a watch on?
08:43Yes, always.
08:44Brilliant.
08:45Strange response.
08:46Do you mind if I take it?
08:47Depends.
08:48Well, I'll look after it.
08:49I'm not an animal.
08:50It's a good watch, this.
08:51Right.
08:52I don't know how long you've got left.
08:54Well, none of us do, don't we?
08:56But isn't that life's big question?
08:58Part of the fun of it, really.
08:59I'll take the old bloody thing, that's right.
09:02See you.
09:03OK.
09:04OK.
09:05OK.
09:06Really simple.
09:07We're going to winch the glasses over the house, and then I'll smash the glasses.
09:14Talk's ticking, Anya.
09:15OK.
09:16Would you like to take a seat, please?
09:17Thank you.
09:18Thank you so much for coming.
09:19Thanks, guys.
09:20Right.
09:21Right.
09:22Right.
09:23So, that's a single piece of string.
09:24This is the anvil.
09:25Mm-hm.
09:26So, just going to...
09:27OK.
09:28You might remember earlier, I took your watch from you.
09:29Yeah, I remember that.
09:30Well, I'm going to give it back, because I'm a good person.
09:32But, first of all...
09:34We've got the trap, we've got the watch.
09:35Well, I do...
09:36I do like my watch.
09:37It's a beautiful watch.
09:38But, points are points.
09:39So, here we go.
09:40I imagine you've got about a minute left.
09:41A minute left.
09:42Oh!
09:43Ooh!
09:44That's good, but it's not what I wanted.
09:45OK.
09:46That's on.
09:47Was that the little bit you were aiming for?
09:48Yeah.
09:49I'm going to give it back, because I'm a good person.
09:50But, first of all...
09:51We've got the trap.
09:52We've got the watch.
09:53Well, I do...
09:54I do like my watch.
09:55It's a beautiful watch.
09:56But, points are points.
09:57So, here we go.
09:58I imagine you've got about a minute left.
09:59A minute left.
10:00Oh!
10:01Ooh!
10:02That's good, but it's not what I wanted.
10:06OK.
10:07That's on.
10:08Was that the little bit you were aiming for?
10:09Yeah.
10:10Yeah.
10:11Amazing.
10:12Watch your head.
10:13OK, we're going to do it.
10:14We're going for it, are we?
10:15OK.
10:16Five.
10:17Four.
10:18Three.
10:19Two.
10:20One.
10:21Oh.
10:22I thought it would be bigger than that.
10:25I thought it would be bigger than that.
10:26Yeah.
10:27Two.
10:28One.
10:30One.
10:32Oh.
10:33I thought it would be bigger than that.
10:38What the hell?
10:39Je pensais qu'il y avait tout de suite à la maison.
10:53Oui !
10:59Oh oui, j'ai joué !
11:02Je suis heureux avec ça.
11:03Ça fonctionne ?
11:04Ça fonctionne, mais comme moi, c'est pas mal.
11:07Je peux avoir ça ?
11:08J'ai le droit ?
11:09Oui, on peut y'en avoir ça ?
11:10Oui, il faut.
11:11Bien, merci.
11:12C'est pas mal, merci vous cherchez mon bon.
11:14D'accord !
11:15Ça marche !
11:16Ça marche !
11:17Ça marche !
11:18L'autre dollar !
11:19Let's get back to the ground.
11:22L'amie-le est avec vous ?
11:23Oui, je suis...
11:25Je vais vouler res k'assiter.
11:26Ça marche !
11:27Ça marche !
11:28C'était un peu ennemi !
11:29C'est bon !
11:30Et puis...
11:31Alors...
11:33...et I l'ai dit tout.
11:35Let the whole thing down was I thought it would cover the whole house.
11:39LAUGHTER
11:41Do you think it was like nuclear paint mode?
11:43Sometimes I don't even need to score this.
11:46Because you scored it yourself.
11:48After the video, you went, oh...
11:50LAUGHTER
11:52Yeah, sometimes you have to know when it's over.
11:54But I've got a lot of my life left to live
12:00Well, I still enjoyed it, watching you fail, Phil.
12:03This was bold.
12:05Merci.
12:06Parce que il aime la watch.
12:07Je dois le voir.
12:08Il est broken ?
12:09Non, il n'a pas broken.
12:10Il m'a fait un peu dure.
12:11Oh, c'est horrifié.
12:12Ce n'est pas un impact.
12:13Mais vous devriez voir la house.
12:18Je ne peux pas, je ne peux pas.
12:20C'est juste une clove.
12:22Let's voir une autre.
12:23OK.
12:24Alors, le suivant n'est pas pour la squamiche,
12:27parce que c'est Reece Scheersmish.
12:29Oh.
12:35Contessa,
12:37pour trois jours,
12:38vous avez dénié de répondre à nos questions.
12:41Vous n'allez pas encore clouper votre tongue ?
12:45Non.
12:46Pour le plus grand effet,
12:48un petit coup,
12:50c'est tout ce qu'il va prendre.
12:52Nous voulons voir si nous ne pouvons pas changer votre conscience.
13:02Nick.
13:05Oh.
13:06Vous n'allez vraiment pas changer votre tongue ?
13:07Yes.
13:08Effouz à jouer.
13:09Oh.
13:10Vous ne serez pas au courant.
13:12Nana.
13:13Il n'a pas encore du livre.
13:14Tu n'as pas à dire quelque chose,
13:16vous chiez prêtez.
13:17Oh.
13:18Je suis prêtez.
13:19Qu'est-ce que vous ne pouvez pas dire ?
13:20Non et je suis prêtez.
13:21Tu ne vas pas.
13:22Je suis prêtez.
13:23Dans le monde.
13:24C'est une chose plus grande.
13:26C'est un peu plus grande.
13:28L'essor.
13:29C'est une chose de trop.
13:30Vous n'avez plus.
13:31Ah.
13:32Elle s'est en Prociation.
13:33Nez.
13:34Vous pouvez le faire de Asda.
13:39Lourde !
13:40Finis ça !
13:56Le travail ici est terminé.
13:58Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
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16:26For greatest effect, you want most of the string.
16:28If I cut it at the very end, I've got more string,
16:31so I can do more with it.
16:33If I hook it round that...
16:35Yeah.
16:37So you are going to cut the string at some point, are you?
16:39Alex, leave the room.
16:40Oh.
16:41That duck.
16:52Upon invitation, Alex is going to walk in,
16:55pull off that hook, and it's going to tug this horse,
16:58which will bring the chicken down.
16:59He'll think, right, that's the chicken out of the way.
17:01Surprise, another chicken.
17:04That chicken, still not over.
17:06Third poulé of the day is going to land ready to eat.
17:10And I'll be waiting, saying, cheers.
17:13There's your seat.
17:14Alex, please enter the restaurant.
17:17The restaurant?
17:18The room.
17:19OK, here I come.
17:20Yeah.
17:24Hooray!
17:27Bon appétit!
17:32Hooray!
17:35Bon appétit!
17:37That's an absolute cockfest.
17:39Look at that.
17:40Three chickens fell over.
17:41Yeah.
17:41And you just cut one bit of string.
17:42That's really good, isn't it?
17:43Absolute cockfest.
17:44LAUGHTER
17:45C'est parti !
18:15C'est parti !
18:45APPLAUSE
18:47I've got to be honest, I was going to score you highly when you just let the table miss the egg.
18:57I thought, that is so clever, because we're all expecting the egg to be smashed.
19:01And you deliberately made it miss the egg, obviously.
19:04Mm-hmm.
19:05And then...
19:06And then?
19:07What a second chapter.
19:08LAUGHTER
19:09Did you deliberately have the balls miss the second egg, or was that just fluke?
19:13That... No, it was deliberate, because the whole thing is you expect the eggs to break.
19:17Yeah.
19:18That's why I said it's existential, because everybody, as people, are the kind of most vulnerable thing, like an egg, and situation and time and the world and everything is everything else.
19:27But we can survive it.
19:29LAUGHTER
19:31You, my friend, are on the wrong show.
19:34LAUGHTER
19:36So, Maisie, I did think it was fairly chaotic.
19:39You helped one of the chickens off the thing, but it was still a pretty great effect.
19:44Thank you.
19:45And you had the best celebration as well.
19:47Whee!
19:48OK, I can score.
19:50What is the least effect?
19:52Well, it's Anya, I'm sorry.
19:53Woo!
19:54One point to Anya.
19:56OK, I think I'll have to give you two on this occasion, Maisie, and I'll give the anvil three.
20:00OK, Phil get three.
20:01No, I don't know.
20:02It was profundity and action, so I think, probably, Sanjeev just pips it.
20:07So, four points to Rhys, five points to Sanjeev.
20:09There we go, five points to Sanjeev.
20:11CHEERING
20:12Can I see the series scores?
20:14Yes, it's tight.
20:15It really is.
20:16Sanjeev is at the bottom with 76.
20:18And then it goes, Maisie, 80.
20:19Phil, 81.
20:20Anya, 82.
20:21Rhys, suddenly in the lead with 83.
20:23CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
20:25Very well.
20:26Right, let's have another.
20:28Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
20:31LAUGHTER
20:44What is it this time?
20:45Well, we're in a corridor.
20:47I know.
20:48What if I don't like heights?
20:50OK.
20:51Write an autobiographical ten-word story.
20:56You have two minutes.
20:58Your time starts now.
21:00On the notepad, please.
21:03Ten-word story.
21:04I don't think I need that many.
21:05I have to write it?
21:07An autobiographical ten-word story.
21:10That's what he wants.
21:11He?
21:12Greg Davis.
21:16He's the Taskmaster.
21:17Yes, thank you.
21:21Ooh, what else have I done in my life?
21:24Great.
21:25Done.
21:26Happy with your story?
21:27It's true.
21:28Do you mind just showing me your...
21:30..story?
21:34That's for you and I'll take this away, thank you.
21:36Oh.
21:37Oh.
21:38OK.
21:39There we go, that's for you.
21:40I knew you were up to something troublesome.
21:45Communicate your story to the Taskmaster.
21:47You may not leave the bridge.
21:49The most accurately communicated story wins.
21:53You have ten minutes to prepare your performance.
21:55Then 30 seconds to communicate your story.
21:58Your time starts now.
21:59You've got time to prepare or practice or...
22:01Yeah, let's just go for it.
22:02You just want to go for it, mate?
22:03Yeah, let's go for it.
22:04Right.
22:08Oh, that's bloody useless.
22:10What is this?
22:11Anya, are you ready?
22:12Yeah.
22:13Ready, Maisie?
22:14Ready.
22:15Am I able to write on this window?
22:19Taskmaster will be watching.
22:21Well, where's the Taskmaster?
22:26Oh, shit!
22:32Grace, grumpy that morning?
22:36No, I thought that's me on a good day.
22:39Sanjeev didn't take any rehearsal time, just launched straight into it.
22:44But we've learnt today, we shouldn't write Sanjeev off.
22:47There's a lot going on up there.
22:50Can we see their ten-word stories?
22:51I'm not so excited.
22:52Yes.
22:53So, we're going to see them one at a time, Greg.
22:54You're going to watch it and you're going to try to scribble down what you think the story is, Greg.
22:57First up, is he Mr Cool and Confident?
23:00Or is it Mr Let's Hurry Up So I Can Bog Off Home Early?
23:03Either way, it's definitely Mr Sanjeev Bassett.
23:05What do you think he wants to do if he wants to do his own?
23:06How can we get him?
23:07Who's battery going off?
23:08Who's battery going off?
23:09Who's battery going off?
23:10Who who knows you're always battery-willed?
23:11Who's battery-willed?
23:19What do you mean?
23:20This is what I've gone with.
23:21Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
23:51We have to take the just as correct into it when I'm scoring.
23:55OK. You want to see another one?
23:57Yes, I do. Who's going to see?
23:58I want you to see Maisie's ten-word story.
24:01OK, here we go.
24:18You look like you don't know what it was.
24:19I don't know what that was.
24:22I've got it.
24:23You're ahead of me.
24:25I've written,
24:26I mean, that is my autobiography, actually.
24:39It's not a million miles off.
24:42Maisie, you wrote,
24:43because you asked me to read the rules out a couple of times.
24:51You got infuriated, you wrote that down.
24:54I'm a fucking idiot.
24:57You've had highs, but this is a low.
25:00OK.
25:01Who's next?
25:01OK, I'm going to show you one more before the break.
25:04Here is Phil's autobiographical ten-word story.
25:07Have a look.
25:07Love you.
25:22Bye-bye.
25:27Bye-bye.
25:29Bye-bye.
29:27It's like a Kate Bush music video.
29:29Have you auditioned for Rada?
29:31Because that...
29:32Do you think that was good?
29:33Yeah.
29:34And he was in Paddington, too.
29:37That's true, isn't it?
29:38That is true.
29:39I didn't finish the previous sentence until it was...
29:40Oh, sorry!
29:42You, er,
29:44took as a compliment.
29:46...took as a compliment.
29:48LAUGHTER
29:50What were you going to say?
29:52But well done.
29:54Well done.
29:55So, this is what I've gone with.
29:56Mm-hm.
29:57Baby born to dancing cat...
29:59...who writes, jumps and then dies.
30:04And you're born.
30:05Cat's the musical, school, university, trampolining, and you die.
30:09Oh!
30:11Oh!
30:13It was the full life.
30:14I told the story in a different way.
30:15I did it through bullet points, which I think...
30:17I didn't realise that you could do it as one sentence.
30:19I thought it was like, do the main events of your life.
30:22Birth, Cat's the musical.
30:24I went trampolining.
30:26Cat's the musical is a big thing in your life, right?
30:28Yeah.
30:29Were you in it, or...?
30:30I watched it.
30:33What did you write again, Fred?
30:35Baby born.
30:36Anya born.
30:37That's good.
30:38To dancing cat.
30:39Cat's the musical.
30:40Who writes, school, university, jumps, trampolining,
30:44and dies.
30:45Anya die.
30:46Wow!
30:47APPLAUSE
30:48That's pretty good!
30:51So, it seems to me Maisie, fortunately, should come in last place
30:54and receive one point.
30:55OK, cos she didn't really understand it.
30:57Followed by half-a-storey Rhys with two points.
30:59OK.
31:00Phil didn't go to the circus, but he did the rest of the stuff.
31:02Yeah.
31:03Three points.
31:04Anya, surprisingly accurate, despite unusual priorities in life.
31:10LAUGHTER
31:11Four points.
31:12But Sanjeev, proving once again,
31:14sometimes, simplicity is best.
31:17Five points for Sanjeev Vascoe!
31:19APPLAUSE
31:23Another task, please, my basic boy.
31:25Yes, I am here to adhere.
31:27And now, what, the flippers?
31:29We're off to the lab.
31:30LAUGHTER
31:31MUSIC
31:32MUSIC
31:33MUSIC
31:34MUSIC
31:35MUSIC
31:36MUSIC
31:37MUSIC
31:38MUSIC
31:44Hello.
31:46You OK?
31:47I am, yeah.
31:48You?
31:49Nice flower.
31:50Is this a new look you're trying?
31:52Maybe.
31:53I'll just sort of mix things up.
31:54OK.
31:55Hello.
31:56You know there's protests outside this lab?
31:57Again?
31:58Yeah.
31:59They're trying to stop you, whatever you're doing here.
32:01LAUGHTER
32:02Should I step into the ring?
32:03That's up to you.
32:04Well...
32:05Is it?
32:07LAUGHTER
32:13Eugh.
32:14Creepy.
32:15LAUGHTER
32:16No strings attached to this, is there?
32:18LAUGHTER
32:20Wear the flippers correctly.
32:22The slowest wins.
32:23Your time started when you entered the room.
32:25I have read that correctly.
32:26Slowest wins.
32:27Slowest?
32:28What a strange task.
32:29APPLAUSE
32:30This is a particularly confusing task, it was slowest wins.
32:31Slowest wins.
32:32No explanation, it was very odd.
32:33What a tricky use of words.
32:34So irritating, isn't it?
32:35Let's begin with two very famous faces from the stage and screen,
32:36perhaps best known for playing Martin in London's Burning,
32:38and Ravi, the Indian cobra from Zoo Rush 2.
32:39Destination New York.
32:40It's Rhys and Sanjeev.
32:41LAUGHTER
32:42Slowest wins.
32:43This is a particularly confusing task, it was slowest wins.
32:44Slowest wins.
32:45No explanation, it was very odd.
32:46What a tricky use of words.
32:47So irritating, isn't it?
32:48Let's begin with two very famous faces from the stage and screen,
32:49perhaps best known for playing Martin in London's Burning,
32:51and Ravi, the Indian cobra from Zoo Rush 2.
32:52Destination New York.
32:53It's Rhys and Sanjeev.
32:54Slowest wins.
33:08So, I've got to sort of make a meal of it.
33:10Oh, look, there's loads of little chopsticks.
33:15What I'm going to do is try to not come out of this circle,
33:20Si je vais essayer de ne pas venir de cette cirque,
33:24je vais essayer d'essayer de les flippers avec les chopsticks.
33:26Oui.
33:31Je suis désormais.
33:36Le truc, Alex, il n'y a pas de raison.
33:39C'est pas vrai?
33:44Non...
33:46...mais.
33:48...mais.
33:49...mais.
33:50Vous m'avez pas comme un hommage.
33:51Do I?
33:55Oh, un peu de choses.
33:56Oh, on va l'offre.
34:00Je vais vous montrer à l'avons du...
34:02...mais-je vous en avoir à l'aider?
34:04Vous nez pas pas à l'aider à l'aider.
34:06Un hour pour l'aider.
34:07Et puis je vais y avoir un nab.
34:09Et puis je vais me retourner.
34:10Je vais vous en venir demain.
34:11Je vais vous en venir demain.
34:18Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
34:48Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
35:18We did, yeah, we did other tasks as well.
35:20I think, in many ways, your attempt was more in the spirit of the show
35:24in that you decided to give yourself extra tasks.
35:27The chopstick ladder.
35:28But it was to buy time. It seemed to be the right thing to do.
35:32Of course. Why sit there doing nothing?
35:34Why go for a nice lunch when you can make a chopstick ladder?
35:37And not deviate from the path.
35:39He's making his own rules.
35:43OK, that's the end of the third part of this Taskmaster chapter.
35:47In the final part of the show, Alex will be up on the stage
35:50wearing Princess Diana's revenge dress
35:53and a load of sausages.
35:55See you soon!
35:56CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
35:57CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
36:03CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
36:05AND APPLAUSE
36:07Welcome back to the last part of the show.
36:10Alex, are we about to finally find out
36:13what the hell is going on in this current task?
36:15Well, Greg, I'm pleased to say we are,
36:17which is less good news for Rhys and Sanjay.
36:22So let's get some answers with our dear friend Pam.
36:25That's Phil, Anya and Maisie.
36:27Pam, their initials spell Pam.
36:30Am I allowed out this reg?
36:32Mm, it's up to you.
36:34MUSIC PLAYS
36:36MUSIC PLAYS
36:38MUSIC PLAYS
36:40MUSIC PLAYS
36:42Can I open that?
36:44MUSIC PLAYS
36:48Every time you say the F word, F word, or F,
36:53your time is halved.
36:54Every time you say flipper, flippers or flour.
36:57God...
36:58LAUGHTER
36:59So...
37:01FFFF...
37:02FUCK!
37:05Every time one of your feet leaves a circle,
37:08your time is halved.
37:09I'm just confused as to why there's a reg.
37:12Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
37:12It's not mentioned in it, is it?
37:14Every time you laugh, your time is halved.
37:17Well, that's all right.
37:18I'm missing something.
37:23That was disappointing.
37:26You must put the flippers on within ten actual minutes
37:30of entering this room, or you will be disqualified.
37:33Ah!
37:34I was heading off,
37:36but then I thought, you know, overnight and stuff,
37:39but it's just at 2 o'clock.
37:40After reading this, you must immediately return to the circle,
37:45but I wasn't in the circle.
37:47Oh, so I don't have to get back in the circle.
37:48Well, you can't return.
37:49You can't return somewhere you've not been.
37:51And the flippers must be where they were
37:52when you entered this room.
37:54Correct.
37:56There's a lot of rules here, Alex.
37:58Like, have a day off, do you know what I mean?
38:04You look like you know what you're doing.
38:05It's always the key thing, I think,
38:07is to look like you know what you're doing.
38:09I thought there was going to be something with the flowers.
38:12Oh!
38:16How do you know how to do a lasso knot?
38:17I don't.
38:20So I've got to wait until it's just about to go ten minutes
38:23and then put the flippers on.
38:24Oh!
38:26How long left, Alex?
38:27I can't tell you that, Maisie.
38:28You can't tell... What are you here for, then?
38:30I need to write down how many times you say flippers.
38:35There's something else I'm missing here.
38:39What am I missing?
38:46What am I... What is it?
38:52BUZZER
38:52BUZZER
38:53BUZZER
38:54BUZZER
38:54BUZZER
38:56BUZZER
38:56BUZZER
38:57BUZZER
38:58BUZZER
39:00BUZZER
39:01BUZZER
39:01BUZZER
39:02BUZZER
39:02BUZZER
39:02BUZZER
39:03BUZZER
39:03BUZZER
39:04BUZZER
39:04BUZZER
39:05BUZZER
39:05BUZZER
39:06BUZZER
39:06BUZZER
39:07BUZZER
39:07BUZZER
39:08BUZZER
39:08BUZZER
39:09BUZZER
39:09BUZZER
39:10BUZZER
39:10BUZZER
39:11BUZZER
39:11BUZZER
39:12BUZZER
39:12BUZZER
39:13BUZZER
39:13BUZZER
39:14BUZZER
39:14BUZZER
39:15BUZZER
39:15BUZZER
39:16BUZZER
39:16BUZZER
39:17BUZZER
39:17BUZZER
39:18BUZZER
39:18BUZZER
39:19BUZZER
39:19BUZZER
39:20BUZZER
39:20BUZZER
39:21BUZZER
39:21BUZZER
39:22BUZZER
39:22Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
39:52The next time you get asked to write a ten-word autobiography,
39:56that seven-minute thing's got to go in.
39:57Was that actually bad? It was uncanny, yeah. Really?
39:59It was as the minute ticked over. Wow.
40:02That's not funny, that's just cool.
40:05So, I can tell you some stats, Greg. Tell me them.
40:08Maisie, when you read the instructions, panicked and put the flippers on
40:13in a total of three minutes and 52 seconds,
40:16which we then have to halve ten times because of various problems.
40:20So, you completed the task in 0.22 seconds.
40:25Wow. Seriously?
40:28It's already better than Sanjeev and Ritz.
40:31Anya, the human clock, finished it in 9 minutes 25 seconds.
40:36Whoa!
40:37Yeah.
40:40You only have to halve it seven times,
40:42so about four and a half seconds she completed the task.
40:44OK. Let's not bother Arv in the next one.
40:46Well...
40:47LAUGHTER
40:48Are we not leading to the joker being the winner?
40:52Phil...
40:53LAUGHTER
40:53LAUGHTER
40:54I have to complete the task in ten minutes.
40:57He put the flippers on in ten minutes and five seconds.
41:00Oh!
41:01If you hadn't done the lassoing,
41:03if you hadn't done the lassoing,
41:04you would have done it in under ten minutes.
41:05But I'm afraid, like the older men, he is disqualified.
41:08Oh!
41:08So, only two scorers in that?
41:10Only two scorers.
41:11It's four points to Maisie.
41:12Oh, bloody... I'll take that, yeah.
41:14LAUGHTER
41:15Five points, Daniel!
41:16CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:20Let's have a quick look at the scores, then.
41:22Sanjeev is in the lead with 14 points!
41:24CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:27OK, everyone, will you all please...
41:30..at...
41:32..stay put...
41:33Oh!
41:34..for the final task of the show!
41:36CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:37CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:39CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:45Oh, whoa!
41:47Sorry, Greg, I think Phil should read a task.
41:51OK, here we go.
41:52Ahem.
41:53Find the age of the mystery person.
41:56You must stay on your seats at all times.
41:59You may ask one question at a time,
42:01going from oldest to youngest,
42:03and you may only say two numbers each.
42:06The person may only say yes or no.
42:08First person to say the correct age wins.
42:11So, there's someone behind that screen.
42:14Yep.
42:15You've got to work out their age by asking them questions.
42:17The twist is you can only say two numbers
42:19throughout the whole thing.
42:20There will be only one winner of this task.
42:22One person takes away five points, the rest get zero.
42:24Do you understand how high the stakes are now?
42:26LAUGHTER
42:27I do.
42:29Wow.
42:30So, this time we're going oldest to youngest.
42:32Hello, Sanjeev.
42:33Thanks.
42:34LAUGHTER
42:35You may ask our mystery person a question.
42:37Are you in your third decade?
42:40No.
42:41OK.
42:42Oh, come on!
42:43When you look in the mirror, do you think you look old?
42:47No.
42:48Right, we're off.
42:50Are you in a decade above the one Sanjeev mentioned?
42:54No.
42:55One is definitely a number.
42:56You mentioned a number!
42:57What?
42:58One is a number.
42:59One is a number.
43:00Oh, for f...
43:01LAUGHTER
43:03So, three questions down, one number gone for Phil.
43:05Maisie, it's your turn.
43:06Were you alive for the moon landing?
43:09Oh.
43:10Yes.
43:11I was, er...
43:13One.
43:14Please don't help the contestant.
43:16LAUGHTER
43:17Does your number start with letter S?
43:23Oh, that's a good answer.
43:25Oh, and you?
43:26Yes.
43:27Ooh!
43:28This is good.
43:29APPLAUSE
43:30Are the two numbers...
43:33LAUGHTER
43:34Well, you've only got one left, but you might as well finish this question.
43:39Are the two numbers in your age the same?
43:42No.
43:43Oh, this is lovely.
43:44It's a great question.
43:45You have sacrificed a number.
43:46This is lovely.
43:47Rhys?
43:48Are you 68?
43:49He's used a number.
43:50Oh, my...
43:51Is it worth it?
43:52No.
43:53Oh!
43:54God, it was bold, though.
43:55Yeah.
43:56OK, we've brought out 68.
43:57Is the letter that follows the other letter of your age
44:03an I?
44:06And that's not a Roman numeral.
44:09LAUGHTER
44:10Sorry, that's right.
44:12No.
44:13Oh.
44:14Oh.
44:15Oh.
44:16Oh.
44:17I'm not sure a mystery person is complete.
44:19Do you mind asking the question again?
44:20Does the letter that follows the other letter you mentioned
44:24from that part of your age begin with the letter I?
44:32Oh, and I don't mean Roman numeral.
44:34I thought that deserved more than I.
44:35LAUGHTER
44:36You're keeping it.
44:37It deserved more.
44:38Thank you.
44:39I don't understand the question.
44:41LAUGHTER
44:42APPLAUSE
44:43It's the letter that follows the other letter that you mentioned
44:50to spell out your age...
44:53..am I?
44:54Yes.
44:55Yes.
44:56Yes.
44:57APPLAUSE
44:58It takes us down to one specific decade for sure.
45:03Can you ride the bus for free?
45:05No.
45:06So, they can't ride the bus for free.
45:09The bit that we've narrowed it down...about.
45:12Yeah.
45:13Is that number got curves?
45:17LAUGHTER
45:18Yes.
45:19Were you born after the Cuban Missile Crisis?
45:24No.
45:25Does the second number rhyme...
45:30Oh.
45:31..with more?
45:32No.
45:33Oh.
45:34If it had done recently, you would have given it to someone else.
45:38Oh.
45:39Well, it's magnanimous.
45:40LAUGHTER
45:41Just guess.
45:42Just guess, sir.
45:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
45:46What a rush.
45:48LAUGHTER
45:49Do you...
45:50..63 years old?
45:53Yes.
45:54CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
45:58It's Quentin from series 13 and 18.
46:00The best that is.
46:02The best that is.
46:03The best that is.
46:04The best that is.
46:05And is that your real voice, Quentin?
46:07I hope not.
46:08LAUGHTER
46:09Quentin, thank you so much for being our guest.
46:12We'll add up the scores and see how that affects the final scores.
46:15Goodbye.
46:16CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:18That was a high-octane round.
46:21LAUGHTER
46:22Is it on purpose that that number is written all over the house?
46:25Everything's on purpose.
46:26LAUGHTER
46:2863 was the age of Quentin, which means that Phil wins five points!
46:31CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:35And so, sadly for Sanjeev, who has not won an episode yet,
46:39he's come second in this one.
46:41The winner with 16 points is Phil Ellis!
46:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:45Phil Ellis wins!
46:46Please head up to pick up some clothing for the person I'm loathing!
46:51CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:52Here he is.
46:53Your latest winner, Phil Ellis!
46:55And Phil Ellis Hall!
46:57CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:59You were on the other side.
47:00I was choisful for the church now.
47:01You're on the other side.
47:03I'm going to uitку for the church.
47:04The club will be a part of the church.
47:07I'll be fine at which one of our guys have been at the church.
47:08Thank you, Phil Ellis!
47:10How are you?
47:12How are we feeling?
47:14How are we feeling?
47:15How are we feeling?
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