Negligence
We are used to forgetting something urgent, leading to being less responsive.
Everybody has their own limitations, including neglecting details, which makes us seem unaware of our actions. It is supposed to be me, being careless or staying ‘nonchalant’, whatever they said about me. Surprisingly, I am one of those people who feel socially awkward around others, perceived by others as ‘an oblivious person.’ As a typical person who is uncomfortable with small talk or starting conversations with people, particularly those I am not close to, my inability to be actively engaged in social interactions is a weakness. I am not ready to mingle. Yet, strangely, I can quickly adapt to new environments, which is quite a paradox.
When it comes to socializing, my mother said I am too clueless about how everyone acts. I froze in my place while others stayed active for their own conversations. Actually, I am not as cold as my mom told, but I still observed what people are doing. Then, it could be easy to reach their conversations without feeling awkward. Being an observer is a way to stay on the right path, even if it requires a gentle analysis of character — with a kind perspective, at the beginning. It does not mean acting arrogantly, but it is part of the process of opening up conversations more effectively.
The word ‘negligence’ carries a negative connotation, in which the meaning is more often ambiguous. Negligence is the failure to exercise the level of responsibility and awareness, resulting in a lack of care. Someone who has a limitation in carefulness will usually be marked as oblivious. It can be caused by their inability to act like ‘a humble person’, though they generally are open to building conversations.
The meaning will change in both directions, regarding a double-edged sword. Several people are confused about how to engage in small talk; some of us end up frozen in the middle of a crowd. On the other hand, many people who are comfortable in their own place do not want to talk to society, and they are expected to be perceived as nerdy.
Get viaaa’s stories in your inbox
Join Medium for free to get updates from this writer.
“What is suitable to you?”
For me, I will pick the first statement, mentioning the first phrase yet again, I find it difficult to find a more perfect word than ‘small talk.’ Apparently, it is a challenge for those facing an obstacle to deal with.
The next part is another layer of negligence for me: being naturally slow, meaning those who are snail-paced in activities. Sometimes being a slow person is good, as we attend to the details and remain unhurried, particularly in the ‘big moments.’ Hence, this would be a problem if there is a lack of time or energy to complete the work, especially when working as a team.
Honestly, I am wondering myself about my own paradox: being sluggish, such as when I prepare to dress up, whereas I am good at working or doing activities related to specific tasks. By preparing me to dress up, I could spend 2 times longer than anyone, which means I should prepare earlier. It might seem like a small thing, but being snail-paced is where my negligence starts to affect others. By contrast, in several parts, like working, my pace is much faster, and somehow a bit too perfectionist since I would love to pay attention to details and make them perfectly on point. It feels weird, but it is real.
I put this negligence because it also involves incompetence in responsibility, which not only harms ourselves but also those around us. A positive way to address this problem is by striving to be more responsible wherever we are. Sometimes, we could change our behavior if the situation begins to show its drawbacks. For instance, as interdependent humans, when we need others’ hands to handle things, whether we want it or not, we must be willing to take the risk. It means to be more open with others. Furthermore, whatever the circumstances, if it is possible to change your habits for the better, you should go for.
Sometimes, the world moves too fast, and my negligence is just me trying to find my own amidst the noise.
Everyone has their own form of negligence, and I believe acknowledging this ‘failure’ side of ourselves is essential for growth, particularly if we want to stay grounded. Both of us are still learning to tackle these challenges day by day until these ‘diseases’ shrink by themselves. We should promise to claim it and strive to keep changing into the good parts.
