- 4 months ago
Taskmaster (NZ) S06 E04 2025
Taskmaster S06 E05>>> https://dai.ly/x9psijy
Taskmaster S06 E05>>> https://dai.ly/x9psijy
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00Oh
00:30Kia ora koutou and welcome to Taskmaster, the show that comedians say yes to because
00:40they're desperate to reinvent themselves, or in Jack Ansett's case, invent themselves.
00:46My name's Jeremy Wells and I am the Taskmaster.
00:52Tonight, our five comedians will be competing in a series of wickedly complex tasks.
00:57And for their efforts, they can win this, a beautiful rendition of My Bonce, a creation
01:05of which broke at least three of the Ten Commandments.
01:09And I would like to once again apologise to my neighbour's oxen.
01:13Tonight's comedic combatants are Alice Sneddon, Brie Tomasel, Jack Ansett, Jackie Van Beek,
01:24and Pat Sassati.
01:29And beside me, as always, is a man who would do anything for me and I would do some things
01:35for him, provided I haven't got anything else on.
01:38Ladies and gentlemen, it's Paul Williams.
01:44What's our prize task tonight, Paul?
01:46Tonight, we've asked our contestants to bring in the thing that will be their downfall.
01:54What did you bring in, Jackie?
01:55I think, let's show the image.
01:59Okay.
02:00So, unfortunately, there's little contrast in this image, but if you can see, it's a huge
02:07five-litre bottle of white vinegar.
02:10Now, I keep it in the laundry, but I also bring it to the dinner table and dress the
02:16salad.
02:17And it's like every time, honestly, I do it, I think, oh my God, is it bleach?
02:23I feel like the mushroom lady from Australia.
02:26Don't point at me!
02:28No, you've got to take that on the trip.
02:30You have a similar vibe.
02:31Hey, I am not related to her.
02:34Brie, what did you bring in?
02:35I would say my downfall is going to be this game.
02:42There's people that know.
02:45I am currently up to level 12,048.
02:57It takes about 10 minutes per level.
03:01So, that means I've spent 83.7 days of my life, has been dedicated to this game in the
03:10last five years.
03:11Brie's mum is in the audience and she's just shaking her head.
03:15Okay, Jack, what did you bring in?
03:17I brought in printouts of all my toxic group chats.
03:20If these get out, it's not just going to be my downfall, it's also going to be, well,
03:28I'll show you some screenshots from the Taskmaster season six group chat.
03:32Hi guys, can't wait for the studio filming.
03:35We should get dinner before it all kicks off, right?
03:37You won't believe this.
03:38Brie comes in with, can't wait to get away from those losers over at ZM.
03:43What the hell, you animal?
03:47I'm going to sue you.
03:49That's not real.
03:51Alice then comes in with, the gender pay gap is real and should be larger.
03:57And two love reacts.
03:59I do stand by that.
04:00I am being paid too much.
04:03And then Pax went, TBH, I don't give a what the Taskmaster thinks of me.
04:08Give me one point, like, I don't even give a single.
04:10I don't.
04:11And, um, and Jackie, Jackie's messages we just straight up can't show on TV.
04:17So, yeah.
04:19Alice, what did you bring in that's going to be your downfall?
04:21In fact, I've brought this.
04:23Yeah, that is a cauliflower.
04:25People who know me personally will know that this is a food that I am violently intolerant of.
04:31Whenever I eat even just a sliver, I am out for the count.
04:36And I'll be honest with you, violent diarrhoea.
04:39And these guys can attest that the aforementioned dinner that we had, Jack ordered cauliflower bites and I did not hold back.
04:48We are not allowed back in that restaurant.
04:51Pax, what did you bring in?
04:53Honestly, Jeremy, I cannot say anything about it.
04:56I just have to show you.
04:57I can't believe you've matched my skin tone.
05:04Yeah.
05:05My last year of high school.
05:07White Chicks is a popular movie.
05:09Yes.
05:10And there was a Halloween disco.
05:13We actually won Best Dressed.
05:14We won Best Dressed.
05:16Thank you so much.
05:18I don't know if I click.
05:19And in 2025, I regret doing white face.
05:22But also, crack up.
05:25Well, the white face is shocking a little bit, but it's more the way that you're biting your bottom lip.
05:31Yeah.
05:32Yeah.
05:33So how would you like to score this?
05:35Alice, one.
05:36Oh.
05:37Come on, a cauliflower gives you diarrhea.
05:39No, don't look at me.
05:40That's not gonna...
05:41I've got diarrhea now.
05:42Own what you've done.
05:43I'm doing the show.
05:45Jackie, two.
05:47Dammit.
05:48Brie, two.
05:50As well?
05:51Yeah, two.
05:51Because it's just distraction, isn't it, ultimately?
05:53Which leaves Pax and Jack both career-limiting.
05:59I think Pax has more of a career to ruin than you do.
06:05So I think you should get four and you should get five Pax.
06:08Okay.
06:10I'm so sorry.
06:12Okay, by round of applause, who knows who I am?
06:20Oh, my God.
06:22Oh, my God.
06:23Okay, Paul.
06:25Why are we?
06:26Should we get into a task?
06:28It's time for the Taskmaster Ranch Redemption.
06:39Oh.
06:39Oh.
06:40I didn't do it.
06:42Where's Paul?
06:43Here he is.
06:44Wow.
06:45He looks so good.
06:46He looks dashing.
06:47It kills me that he gets to have a photo like that of himself.
06:50It's got a code on the back of it.
06:52Oh, my God.
06:53It's an escape room.
06:54Well, we are in prison by the looks of it.
06:56I love these.
06:57Do you?
06:57Yeah, I like them too.
06:58Bust out of this prison.
07:01Fastest to get outside wins.
07:02You may not leave the lab until you've found the blue key.
07:07Do you always read the tasks like this?
07:09Yes, Pax.
07:10You cannot leave the house until you've found the red key in the study.
07:14Prison guard Paul will be on patrol.
07:16If he catches you awake...
07:18Two minutes will be added to your time.
07:20Your time starts now.
07:21Okay, let's do it.
07:22So, we're finding the red key.
07:24The blue key.
07:25I'm going to...
07:25Oh, shit.
07:26Okay, this is not going to work well.
07:32You sleeping?
07:37Oh, yeah, I'll get that out.
07:39We need a combination lock.
07:40So, we need a three-digit code for that one, and I'm just going to grab it.
07:44So sexy when you just handle it with brute force.
07:47Oh, it'll be written on the desk, like in school.
07:49Okay, here we go.
07:50Oh, oh.
07:50Okay, five?
07:51Five, four, four, six.
07:53Down.
07:56You sleeping?
07:58I was thinking about my mum.
08:02Back to sleep.
08:03I'm a sloop.
08:04Okay, you've got it.
08:05Let's go.
08:05Five, four, four, six.
08:07Yes.
08:09The encase.
08:10The pillowcase.
08:11Okay, you really get in there.
08:13I can't really do much.
08:14I'm just...
08:14Yes.
08:15Two, three, seven.
08:17What have we got?
08:18Oh, burner.
08:19Burner phone.
08:20I want to turn on.
08:22Under the bed, perhaps?
08:23Under the bed?
08:24Oh, there it is.
08:26What's that?
08:27What is it?
08:27It's a map.
08:27Prison guard pulls...
08:29Patrol route.
08:31This is the route he's on.
08:33Okay.
08:33Is there something down here?
08:35Is it in the soap?
08:36Is it in the soap?
08:38Oh, yeah.
08:40Oh!
08:41Oh!
08:42Oh!
08:42Oh!
08:42Oh!
08:42Oh!
08:42Oh!
08:43Oh!
08:43Oh!
08:43Oh!
08:44Oh!
08:44Oh!
08:45Oh!
08:45Oh!
08:46Oh!
08:47Oh!
08:47Okay, we can leave.
08:47We'll take the map.
08:48No, but we have to...
08:48We'll take the map!
08:49Where's the map, guys?
08:50Down, down, down, down.
08:51Break, break, break, break.
08:53Wait till he comes to the lab, then we have the...
08:55Oh!
08:55Oh!
08:56Oh!
08:56Oh!
08:56Oh!
08:57Oh!
08:57Oh!
08:57Oh!
08:58Oh!
08:58You're back to sleep.
08:59Oh!
09:00Oh!
09:00Oh!
09:01Oh!
09:01Oh!
09:02Oh!
09:03Oh!
09:03Oh!
09:04Oh!
09:05Oh!
09:05If he doesn't come in here, he'll go outside for a bit.
09:09Okay.
09:11So he's gone outside.
09:12Shh, quiet.
09:18I actually, I find it fascinating how people,
09:22particularly of people who have less melanin,
09:27I find it fascinating how that community loves escape rooms.
09:32Yeah.
09:33Not so big with you?
09:34Not so big with our community,
09:35particularly because my dad was a refugee
09:37and the first 15 years of his life was an escape room.
09:41You'd think you'd be great at it then.
09:48Okay, so they still have to find the red key in the study
09:51and escape the house.
09:53But so far, Bree and Alice found the blue key
09:56and escaped their cell in 16 minutes and 51 seconds.
10:00Okay.
10:00Jackie, Jack and Pax found the blue key
10:02and escaped the cell in 4 minutes 19.
10:05Whoa.
10:05Whoa.
10:06Time now for you at home to be imprisoned by the shackles of capitalism.
10:10We'll play some ads and we'll see you on the other side.
10:13Go to Koutou and welcome back to Cast Master.
10:27Right now we are right in the middle of watching our teams escape New Zealand's least secure corrections facility.
10:33Where are we at, Paul?
10:35So at the halfway point, the team of three have a 12 and a half minute lead.
10:41Now they must find the red key in the warden's office.
10:45Here they are, the Jacks and Pax.
10:47What is the question mark?
10:52Okay, so we need to work out what the spells may be.
10:54Let's take the first letter.
10:55Okay, C.
10:56Cup or mug?
10:58Cup.
10:59Or, or, oh, come on.
11:01Mommy.
11:03Get back to sleep.
11:04I'm so asleep, baby.
11:05Um.
11:06So the question mark has to mirror that.
11:08Maybe it's what is the question mark.
11:11Is it the amount of letters in each word?
11:13Nug gum three.
11:14Eight.
11:14Ten.
11:15Three.
11:15Star.
11:16Life.
11:16Four.
11:18Get back to sleep.
11:20You can do this.
11:22Especially Jackie.
11:24Jackie, what do you have that we don't?
11:26Okay, I'm a linguistics expert.
11:28Yeah.
11:28It's linguistics, it's letters.
11:32I did do Shakespeare English in year 13.
11:34It's so, like, it's not like I'm completely.
11:38Should I just call Jesse?
11:40He's really good at this stuff.
11:41Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, okay.
11:45Hey, man, what's up?
11:48Get back to sleep.
11:49All right.
11:49Yeah.
11:50Where'd you get a phone?
11:51That's contraband.
11:51No.
11:52No.
11:53We just want to take selfies.
11:58Star.
11:59Stop.
12:00Oh, oh, I've got it, I've got it.
12:02What is backwards?
12:03Goods, mug, gum, needs 10.
12:06Oh, my God.
12:07Star.
12:07Oh, my God.
12:10I'm a genius.
12:11You're the smartest man in the world.
12:15That is brilliant.
12:16So it's pots, pots, pots, the pots up here.
12:18It's up here.
12:19Yes, it is.
12:20Oh, it is.
12:21Oh, it is.
12:21Oh, it is.
12:21Oh, okay.
12:22Oh, Jack's the weakest link.
12:24Oh.
12:24Oh.
12:25Oh.
12:26James has got to be let us down.
12:28Yes.
12:29Go, go, go.
12:30That way, no, no, no, that way.
12:32This way, this way, this way.
12:33Oh, shit.
12:34Get to sleep.
12:35Oh, my God.
12:38You sleeping?
12:39Oh.
12:40Good sleeping.
12:42Okay, now we're playing the clear.
12:44We've got to get out of here.
12:45Let's just get to the cars.
12:46I want to see my kids.
12:47Let's go watch.
12:55Jack, there was a real moment of team unity there when you cracked the code.
13:00Yeah.
13:01And then you immediately started rubbing it in their faces.
13:05Yeah.
13:06I just want to let everyone know how long it took our linguistics experts to not know the answer.
13:12But can I also just reiterate to you, like, have some grace.
13:18Every time you get a win, you turn it and you, like, you bat it into the space.
13:23You love it in our face.
13:23They're going to say, we want to love you.
13:25We want to.
13:25You make it very hard.
13:27Okay, let's talk about some times.
13:30Yes.
13:30Their total time to get out of the house was 40 minutes and 32 seconds.
13:34Oh, not bad.
13:36But that's pre the bonuses.
13:39So I caught them awake 14 times.
13:42Which adds 28 minutes to their time for a total of one hour, eight minutes and 32 seconds.
13:49Woo!
13:50Yeah.
13:51Respectable.
13:52Yeah.
13:52Yeah.
13:53Yeah, that's all right.
13:54I hate it.
13:54Okay, who have we got next, Paul?
13:56Here's Criminallus and Penitentiabri.
14:03Okay.
14:05Okay.
14:05Is this some sort of phrase or something?
14:10Okay.
14:11What looks out of place?
14:14Those pots always there.
14:16Oh, for f***s sake.
14:17I don't know.
14:21Weird.
14:21Kid.
14:21Kid.
14:25I've always wanted to be someone's prison bitch.
14:31I'm so scared.
14:33I'm so scared.
14:34Thank you, Bree.
14:35Thank you, Alice.
14:36See ya.
14:37See ya, Paul!
14:43Bree, is that the most fun you've had doing a task?
14:46I honestly had the best time.
14:49I just got confused because it was so easy.
14:52Okay, let's do the scoring.
14:56The team of two, they escaped the house in 22 minutes and 51 seconds.
15:01How many penalties?
15:01I caught them awake three times.
15:04Oh, come on.
15:06For six minutes added for a total of 28 minutes and 51 seconds.
15:11Happy.
15:11So the team of two won by 39 minutes and 41 seconds.
15:16Great timing.
15:16It's nice to see the positivity, too.
15:18Isn't it refreshing?
15:20That was really refreshing.
15:21I'm going to give you guys five points for that.
15:23Good vibe.
15:25The question is, how fewer points do you give the team of three?
15:29I feel sorry for them.
15:30Give them two.
15:31That's good.
15:31Not bad.
15:32That's good.
15:32Don't flash out.
15:34Fair.
15:35Fair.
15:36Okay, how has that affected the scores for the episode, Paul?
15:40It's very tight.
15:41In first equal on seven, it's Bree and Pax.
15:46This is a weird feeling being up there.
15:49That task, Paul, has not filled up our allotted time slot.
15:52I think we should have one more, please.
15:53It's time to see how our contestants perform in the heat of the moment.
16:06Paul!
16:07Bree.
16:09You just woken up?
16:11No, I have just been regrouping.
16:13Oh, okay.
16:16You're going to nail through your finger?
16:17Yeah.
16:18Why are you smiling so much?
16:20Did you believe it at all?
16:22No.
16:22Yeah, okay.
16:23A waste of time.
16:24Sweet.
16:26Oh, f*** sake.
16:27Film an extremely climactic scene.
16:32Most climactic scene wins.
16:34You must use this prop?
16:36This being this piece of paper, I assume.
16:39No.
16:39Or the skis.
16:40The skis.
16:42You have 40 minutes.
16:43Your time starts now.
16:45Well, we're off to a good start.
16:48Okay, so immediately my brain goes to somebody hanging off the balcony, using this, holding
16:54on while having an orgasm.
16:55What's the orgasm bit?
16:57Well, that's also a climax.
16:58Oh, okay.
16:59What if a lot of people don't orgasm?
17:01My first thought is, obviously, sex.
17:04What if we recreate the moment at the end of the Titanic?
17:09There's not a more climactic moment than the big door scene.
17:13What are the dogs that go searching in the snow?
17:16St. Bernard.
17:17So I'm going to need a St. Bernard.
17:19Okay, that might be hard.
17:20Life is hard.
17:21Okay.
17:22I'm going to need a St. Bernard.
17:23I was trying to think of, like, a big cliffhanger, and there's something in my life that I actually
17:27think about quite frequently, and I've never resolved it.
17:31And I think maybe if we filmed it documentary style, and then I resolved it, then that would
17:35be the climax.
17:39What a cliffhanger.
17:41What were you doing with your finger?
17:42Oh, it's just a bit of fun.
17:45Trying to make him laugh.
17:46Thought I would get a bigger laugh in the room.
17:49Turns out, big mistake.
17:51No, that bombed.
17:54Yeah, it did.
17:54Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
17:58Let's get into it.
17:59Her prop was an umbrella.
18:01It's Alice Sneddon.
18:03Lovely day on the mountain.
18:05Yeah, shall we go for a hike?
18:07Let's hike up this mountain.
18:08Okay, better pack up our umbrellas first.
18:13Let's walk up the mountain.
18:15It's a beautiful mountain.
18:18Hey, Kevin.
18:19Yeah?
18:20Have you ever thought we could be more than just friends?
18:24I've thought about that a lot.
18:26Kevin?
18:27Yeah?
18:27Do you want a kiss?
18:29I want nothing more than to kiss.
18:31Oh, my God.
18:43Whoa.
18:44Whoa.
18:45I think it's erupting.
18:48Oh, my God.
18:48I am erupting.
18:50Gross.
18:51No.
18:51We've got to get out of here.
18:52I can't go right now.
18:54Whoa.
18:54Whoa.
18:55Whoa.
18:57Whoa.
18:58The love of my life.
19:07Killed by the lava because he was climaxing.
19:12Sexually.
19:15Happy with that?
19:16Not really.
19:23So did the guy jizz or did the mountain jizz?
19:26Yeah.
19:27Well, isn't that interesting?
19:28Or is the mountain a metaphor?
19:29I think where it fell down slightly was the energy of vocal performance.
19:34Well, we all know that's not my strength, but you keep putting me in these positions.
19:39Can we hear you try and do two different voices?
19:43Yep.
19:43This is my first one.
19:44Yep.
19:45This is my second.
19:49Okay.
19:49Who's next?
19:50Now to the Swiss Alps, where the slopes are steep and the Swiss accents are undeniably authentic.
19:57Her prop was a set of skis.
19:59It's Jackie Van Beek.
20:01Harry!
20:02For God's sake, where are you?
20:05Hello there, ma'am.
20:07I'm from Search and the Rescue.
20:09How can I help you today?
20:10I was meant to meet my secret lover, Harry, here up on top of this magnificent alp.
20:15But he's four days late and I'm sick with worry.
20:19There was that terrible avalanche on Tuesday.
20:22But all the snow has melted.
20:23I mean, where could he possibly be?
20:25Well, no, not all the snow has melted.
20:28There is a small patch at the bottom of the hill.
20:30What's that strange beast sniffing around for down there?
20:37That's my St. Bernard.
20:39I'm going to have to go down there.
20:40I'm going to need to borrow your skis.
20:41Yes, ma'am.
20:42Okay.
20:43I'm coming, Harry.
20:45I'm coming, Harry.
20:48Don't go too fast.
20:50I need a spade.
20:52Here's a spade.
20:54I'll bring it down.
20:57Okay.
20:57Oh, God, the snow.
21:01Oh!
21:05Harry!
21:07No!
21:08No!
21:19So what accent did you tell Paul to do?
21:22I told you to do a kind of pan-scando, kind of as you see fit.
21:28It was more Scottish, I thought, than Swiss.
21:30Yeah, I thought it was Scottish.
21:31Interesting heritage.
21:32At one point you dipped into my Persian uncle.
21:36Accent-wise.
21:39Well, it's time for what we call in the business a cliffhanger.
21:42We'll see you in a moment.
21:43Welcome back to Taskmaster.
21:58For the break, we saw a man drown in lava and another man die of frostbite.
22:03Who's bringing us our next blockbuster climax, Paul?
22:06The back 90% of your seats will not be necessary.
22:10For this one, you will only be needing the edge of your seat.
22:14His prop was some sunglasses.
22:16It's Climax Asadi.
22:22Paul.
22:24Have you done it yet?
22:25Have you killed Pax Asadi, the employee that I hate so much?
22:29I can't do it.
22:30You got it, man.
22:31The only way to get rid of an employee here in Aotearoa, New Zealand, is to kill them.
22:36So, you have until the end of the day.
22:38Yes, sir.
22:40Paul!
22:41Why are you doing this?
22:42The boss said I had to.
22:44Surely he could just let me go.
22:46Not from the balcony, but just like legally.
22:49No, it was some weird rule.
22:51Paul, I have to tell you something else.
22:53What?
22:54I'm in love with you.
22:57You have to do this, man.
22:58How much do you love this job?
23:00So much.
23:01Tell me, look at me in the eyes or in the glasses.
23:03Look at me in the glasses and tell me how much you love this job, man.
23:07I love this job.
23:09Then I guess that's it, then.
23:14Ah!
23:14Ah!
23:14Ah!
23:26Ah!
23:28Ah!
23:29Ah!
23:30Ah!
23:34Sorry.
23:35Can I just point out Pax has done Whiteface again?
23:38Ah!
23:38Ah!
23:39Yeah.
23:39Ah!
23:39I just don't think it was a very good cliffhanger.
23:42You should have cut it off before you hit the ground and leave us all in the lurch, you
23:46know?
23:46Like...
23:47The task was not a cliffhanger.
23:48Yeah.
23:49What?
23:49It was the biggest climax.
23:51That's what it means. Climax.
23:53I would say a cliffhanger cuts off.
23:56The cliffhanger doesn't give you the climax.
23:57I'm working on my nice guy thing.
23:59I'm happy to bow down and let you guys have this one.
24:01Hope you feel good.
24:04Three climaxes down, three tragic deaths.
24:08Can we go four and four?
24:10It's time to get real.
24:11Here is a tragic glove story from Jack Ansett.
24:17Blood on my hands, the truth told at last.
24:22Yeah, okay.
24:24I'm just gonna message him and see if he wants to talk.
24:28Yeah.
24:30Okay.
24:31Hey man, random message.
24:34Can I call you to confess something from school?
24:40Sent.
24:42You're probably wondering what this is all about.
24:45I guess I'll just start from the beginning.
24:57It was year two.
24:58One day at lunchtime, I was walking into the cloakroom.
25:02Judah Watkinson, he was drinking out of his drink bottle.
25:05I walked past him and I smacked the bottle.
25:09And it knocked his tooth out.
25:11There was blood everywhere.
25:12And I ran.
25:13I just ran.
25:14I ran outside.
25:15I found my friend Daniel.
25:16I was like, what do we do, man?
25:18This is gonna be the end of me.
25:19I'm finished.
25:20Look at me, Jack, he said.
25:21Look at me.
25:22This is what you need to do.
25:23You say you were walking through the cloakroom through the toilet and your shoulder accidentally
25:29buffed the drink bottle.
25:30You're gonna be fine, he said.
25:32Come on.
25:33So we go back to class.
25:34We're doing our silent reading.
25:35And eventually, yeah, Mrs. Royal, she goes, can I please speak to Jack?
25:41Walk outside into the cloakroom.
25:44Judah is there.
25:45Blood everywhere.
25:46And Mrs. Royal says, Jack, Judah says, you smacked his drink bottle and his tooth came
25:53out.
25:54Is this true?
25:55And I said, no.
25:57He's lying.
25:58What happened was, I was walking to the toilet and my shoulder accidentally knocked it.
26:04And I say, if you don't believe me, ask Daniel.
26:09And he pulls through, he goes, Jack was walking to the toilet and his shoulder buffed the drink
26:13bottle.
26:14And Mrs. Royal has heard all she needs to hear.
26:16And she says to Judah, stop making things up and go to the sick bay.
26:20Right now.
26:21And then she turns to me and says, I'm so sorry about all this, Jack.
26:23Now I go back to my classroom, all my teeth intact and carry on with my schooling.
26:28I'm just gonna message him and see if he wants to talk.
26:31Yeah.
26:33Okay.
26:35Sent.
26:37I can't cover up this blood with this glove and take this blood off my hands.
26:41To I hear back from Judah.
26:49So a slightly different tack here.
26:51We've gone true crime documentary.
26:53Yeah.
26:54So the climax would be.
26:59Seems like a cliffhanger.
27:00Yeah.
27:01Yeah.
27:02It's the same thing.
27:03No, it's not.
27:04It's the same thing.
27:05If that was the Shawland Street Christmas cliffhanger, you would be like, I cannot wait for January.
27:11I agree.
27:12Which then we would see the climax.
27:13Yeah.
27:14You've muddled it all up.
27:15There are courses you can do.
27:16Yeah.
27:17Like, down seas, uni tech.
27:20Jack's a smart guy.
27:21And so what I think Jack's gonna turn around and say to us now is, here's the text from Judah.
27:33I would love that to be the case, Jeremy Wells.
27:36Judah has not responded to any communication.
27:39Yeah.
27:40We know why.
27:42Okay.
27:43Who have we got next, Paul?
27:44The final contestant to throw their hat in the ring, it's Brie Thomas-L.
27:48Climactic.
27:49That's like, big moment.
27:51Do you want me to look up what climactic means?
27:53Yeah.
27:54C-L-I-M-A-T-I-C.
28:00It's gonna be something about climate change, isn't it?
28:03Relating to climate.
28:04I f***ing knew it.
28:06You love to do this, Paul.
28:10Where you make people think that it's one thing.
28:13And you know what?
28:15I actually think the Titanic scene still works.
28:22Paul.
28:23I love you.
28:24Don't you do that.
28:25Don't you start saying your goodbyes.
28:27Do you understand me?
28:29It's, Paul, it's snowing.
28:31It's getting colder.
28:32We're in the Bahamas.
28:33I know.
28:34That damn climate change, Paul.
28:37Oh, there's hail, Paul.
28:38Promise me something, Brie.
28:40Anything, Paul.
28:41Promise.
28:42Anything.
28:43Look at me, look at me.
28:44Promise that you'll put a multi on the Warriors to win the whole thing.
28:47Of course, Paul.
28:48You know it's gonna be our year, Paul.
28:50Cause soon, there won't be any years left.
28:53I think it's time to let go.
28:54No, I can just hold on.
28:56Nobody think you should...
28:58Paul!
28:59Don't even let go!
29:00Paul!
29:04Paul!
29:09Probably could've fit on here.
29:11There's quite a lot of room.
29:12Paul?
29:14Oh, he's gone.
29:15He's gone.
29:22Incredible investigative work from you again, Brie.
29:26They're throwing him up and I just keep...
29:29No.
29:30And so you ended up actually doing your original idea.
29:32Yeah.
29:33Made it work.
29:34Yeah, there was hail, there was snow, there was...
29:36What else did we have, Paul?
29:38There was a lot of references to the climate, I will say.
29:40Mine was set in Guam, which is at risk of rising sea levels.
29:43You actually say Aotearoa, New Zealand.
29:49Firstly, Jack made a cliffhanger.
29:52So, even though I thought that was a great documentary, it was really, really good, that's one point for you.
29:57Alice, yours was fantastic with the figurines, but it didn't have anything to do with climate change, so I think it's fair that you get two.
30:03Pax also didn't have anything to do with the climate, but I thought it was quite a biting satire on New Zealand's draconian employment law.
30:13So I thought...
30:14Exactly.
30:15So, he gets three.
30:16Four points for Jackie, because there was mention of the climate with the skiing.
30:20Oh yeah.
30:21And then five points for Brie, clearly, because she understood the task.
30:24Well done.
30:25We are going to take a break now, which will give four of our comedians ample time to second-guess their reading comprehension for every upcoming task in the series.
30:37We'll see you in a moment.
30:39Welcome back to Taskmaster, where five comedians are trying to win a cauliflower, some vinegar, and the ghost of Pax Society.
30:56Just to change things up a bit, I would like a task, please, Paul.
31:00Sure thing, Jeremy. Let's cram in one more.
31:03Hi, Paul.
31:13Hello, Pax.
31:14Paul Walliams.
31:16It's Williams.
31:18I'm the nephew of Serena and Venus.
31:22Hello, Alice.
31:23Psst.
31:27Oh, thanks, Paul.
31:30This is a lot of reading.
31:32Sorry.
31:33During the next task, you will hear a countdown from 40.
31:36The vase will fall from the shelf.
31:41Oh, okay.
31:42With 29 seconds left, ping pong balls will fall from the roof.
31:47And Paul will throw a tennis ball to you with 25 seconds left.
31:51You will be asked to complete the maze on the blackboard.
31:54And to spell the word task in semaphore?
31:57What the hell does that mean?
31:59Semaphore?
32:00You're making words up.
32:02The flag alphabet.
32:04Oh, no.
32:06The Premier of New Zealand in 1874 was Sir Julius Vogel.
32:11What's that got to do with anything?
32:12Why are you telling me about the Premier?
32:14What does that have anything to do with it?
32:16And the second wire from the right will trigger the confetti.
32:20The second wire from the right?
32:22Well, it depends who's right.
32:24You may not touch anything in this room until your time starts during the next task.
32:29You must leave this room in eight minutes.
32:31This is really, really hectic.
32:33But your time starts now.
32:35Do you understand?
32:36I can confidently say no.
32:39This is actual insanity.
32:42Nope.
32:43Have you done much semaphore before?
32:45Semaphore was my first language.
32:46You know, you go to school, start speaking English, and then you just kind of forget it.
32:51And I'll come over here.
32:52Bang.
32:53And we're done.
32:54Whatever this is.
32:55Leave the room, please.
32:57Oh, God.
32:58I'm so anxious.
33:01Hello, Pax.
33:10What's that?
33:11Hello, Alice.
33:12Oh, no.
33:15There's another thing.
33:16It's just the task.
33:18I thought the last task was the task.
33:20No, that was just prep for the task.
33:22Oh, man.
33:24Stop the vase from breaking.
33:27Avoid being hit by the ping pong balls.
33:29Answer Paul's trivia question.
33:31Spell the word task in semaphore.
33:33Catch the ball when Paul throws it.
33:35Complete the maze on the blackboard.
33:37And cut the wire that triggers the confetti.
33:39You may only cut one wire.
33:43Least mistakes wins.
33:45You have 40 seconds maximum.
33:48Last line, please.
33:51No.
33:52Last line.
33:53No.
33:54Because it's too much for me to process.
34:00Oh, that was mad.
34:02Okay.
34:03There was quite a lot to process there.
34:04Yeah.
34:05So, basically, a lot of stuff was going to happen very quickly.
34:08Mm-hmm.
34:09But we told them what was going to happen and gave them eight minutes to prep for it.
34:13Yeah.
34:14Which I thought was quite generous of you, actually.
34:15Who are we going to see first?
34:16I'm Johnny Knoxville.
34:18And welcome to Jack Alice.
34:21This is not going to be pretty.
34:22Your time starts now.
34:2440, 39, 38, 37, 35, 34.
34:30Who was the premier of New Zealand in 1874?
34:33Sir Julius Vogel.
34:34Sarah Fore!
34:35Ha!
34:36Ha!
34:37Ha!
34:38Ha!
34:39Ha!
34:40Ha!
34:41Ha!
34:4226!
34:4329!
34:4428!
34:4527!
34:4626!
34:4725!
34:4924!
34:5023!
34:5125!
34:5224!
34:5323!
34:54Who was the premier of New Zealand in 1874?
34:57Vogel!
34:58Vogel!
34:59Mr. Vogel, Paul!
35:01Full name.
35:02John Vogel.
35:0410, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
35:21It's anti-climatic.
35:23Are you happy with that?
35:25It's impossible to say.
35:29Alice, from you, clinical use.
35:35I remember Julius Vogel.
35:37I did the maze expertly.
35:39I saved the vase.
35:40You caught the ball.
35:41I caught the ball.
35:42That was great.
35:43So out of the seven things to do, she missed the semaphore
35:46and she cut the wrong wire.
35:48But the rest were correct.
35:49So she got five out of seven correct.
35:50Wow.
35:51Wow.
35:52That's unbelievable.
35:54And what about Jack?
35:56Jack stopped the vase from breaking.
35:58He dodged the ping pong balls and he completed the maze.
36:01If you're accepting that.
36:02Yeah.
36:03Well, what about the seraphore?
36:06You wrote, um, Vamil.
36:08Who is up next?
36:12Paul Williams.
36:13It's Paxi Van Breek.
36:16Your time starts now.
36:1940.
36:2039.
36:2140.
36:2239.
36:2338.
36:2438.
36:2538.
36:2637.
36:2736.
36:2835.
36:2934.
36:30Oh my God, it's like The Hunger Games.
36:31games who was the premier of New Zealand in 1874 Vogel John John Travolta sir
36:58Julius Vogel first name
37:19I did it
37:28I've stopped the clock it's the wrong one eh I think that went well and was the
37:37confetti in time yes and the semaphore was in time yes it was in my time I think I
37:45gave myself a new hemorrhoid cutting that wire
37:49you gave yourself a new hemorrhoid yeah to add to the others can I just ask the question my
38:03semaphores did I actually get two right yes you went ta two more if you went s and k then you'd be away
38:12laughing what was surprising was that Pax Asadi whose first language was semaphore didn't even try
38:17that didn't feel like I needed to prove myself in that context so that would mean Jackie and Brie
38:26both five mistakes out of seven Jack and Pax four mistakes out of seven and Alice only two mistakes
38:34out of seven impressive so that's one point for Jackie and Brie three points for Jack and Pax and five
38:40points for Alice Sneddon
38:41no stop that stop that
38:44right that's all for part four see if you can make a cup of tea grab some biscuits
38:50fold some washing and squeeze in a wee during the ads see you after the break
39:04welcome back to task master now we've just got the one live task to go but before we get to that
39:12can I have a score update please Paul we currently have a three-way tie out in front it's Alice Brie and
39:18Pax lots to play for you guys please head up to the stage for the final task of the show
39:27okay Paul who's reading the task tonight Brie take your time make the most unique noise the
39:39task master will identify which two noises sound the most alike the least passionate of these two
39:46noises will be eliminated last remaining contestant wins you must make your noise with your mouth your
39:52noise may not be a word you have five seconds to make your noise each ram will have a theme that
39:58must inspire your noise for the final round the two most similar noises will be eliminated and can
40:04we clarify so we're not in teams this is just for the place now because we look like no you're not
40:09okay the theme for the first round is Wednesday headphones on Alice Sneddon
40:22three
40:28yeah
40:32jack
40:34jacky
40:40Jackie.
40:47Packs.
40:55Jeremy, which two sounds were the least unique?
40:58I think it's clearly Bree and Ellis.
41:00And who was the least passionate?
41:02Ellis.
41:03You've been eliminated.
41:05Well, it's quite hard to argue with that, isn't it?
41:09Round two's theme, Romeo.
41:15Bree.
41:25Jack.
41:32Enough, okay.
41:36Jackie Van Beek.
41:39.
41:48Packs.
41:52It's Bree and Packs.
41:56And Packs is the least passionate,
41:58because the other two were completely original,
42:01It's completely original, so Pax is eliminated.
42:11You have been eliminated.
42:15For the final round, the two least unique sounds will both be eliminated.
42:20Understood.
42:21The theme is cow.
42:24Brie Tomasell.
42:31Jack Anseid.
42:48Oh, regrets.
42:52Jackie Van Dyke.
42:53Jackie Van Dyke.
43:04Headphones off, please.
43:05Headphones off?
43:06Yes, please.
43:13Jeremy, whose two sounds were the least unique?
43:17Brie and Jackie.
43:19Oh my God!
43:25Well done, everyone.
43:26Come on down and we'll score it.
43:32Sit on down, everyone, and let's score that live task.
43:36So one point for Alice, two points for Pax, three points for Brie and Jackie, and five points for Jack Anseid.
43:44Here we go.
43:46So, Paul, where does that leave the scores for the episode?
43:51With a one point win on 16 points, the winner of episode four is Brie Tomasell.
44:01Congratulations on winning a truly horrible collection of items.
44:05Please go up and collect your fellow contestants and pending dooms.
44:11So, what have we learned this week?
44:14We've learned the difference between a climax and a cliffhanger.
44:18And we've learned that when you're breaking out of prison, less people is more.
44:23But most importantly, we've learned that the winner of this episode is Brie Tomasell.
44:27Thank you so much for watching.
44:30We'll see you next time.
44:32Yeah!
44:34Oh, shit.
44:36Yeah!
44:38Yeah!
44:40Bums!
44:42Jesus!
44:44Jesus!
44:45All right!
44:47Yeah!
44:49You know what I love, Paul?
44:51I love a montage.
44:53Cue montage!
44:55Oh!
44:57Oh!
44:59I don't think this is possible.
45:01Oh!
45:03That was the most successful moment in the history of this show!
Be the first to comment