Negotiation Skills for Nonprofits

Your First Visit With A Prospective Donor: What Can Go Right and What Can Go Wrong If a prospective donor agrees to meet you, it's a remarkably positive sign. It means they are wiling to consider supporting your organization. That's increasingly difficult to do these days, especially with those who have no apparent history with your organization. Unless you have misled them or been unclear as to who you are and how you work. If you have, you have to continue in that role. That's why those who befriend donors find it so difficult to turn the conversation toward support. If you've played it straight, the first meeting should be about finding out why they took the meeting. Chances are there is some history with your organization or some affinity with its mission or those it seeks to support. You can do that by establishing yourself as a philanthropic facilitator not a transactional fundraiser. In your own words you make clear: I'm here to hear what's important to you. I'm listening for a match between your interests and our service aspirations. If I can, I'll follow up with some ideas to suggest what that potential match could look like. If an idea resonates with you, I will offer you ways of learning more about the project and the people who will bring it to life or do my best to respond to yours. I'll preview my purpose before each visit and ask permission to take the next step. If you propose something we can't do or isn't strategic for us, I will let you know. I don't want to take your money then disappoint you. If you lose interest, please let me know why and what I can learn from it. If you're enjoying the process and becoming more enthusiastic about the idea, I will ask permission to put a draft proposal in front of you and we'll enter into a negotiation that will produce an agreement satisfactory to both. Written agreements show we seek a partnership not just a gift. The agreement will specify: The use of funds The projected impact The timeline for implementation The means of monitoring progress How we will keep you informed Your ongoing role with our organization What can go wrong? You go into pitch mode You overstate what your organization has done or can do You don't demonstrate respect and interest by your failure to listen You fail to hear what is being said because you listening for what you hope to hear You don't have a process like the one outlined above so you just wing it The prospect wonders or worries, "What's going on here." You cause the prospect to conclude, "I wouldn't enjoy working with this person." The prospect begins to think less of the organization because of the way you conduct yourself You raise the hopes of the prospect hoping to go back to the organization to see if it can back up what you made up You realize you are representing an organization that wants money but can't demonstrate how it will produce impact and isn't really interested in building community

I’ve seen leaders promote toxic employees to other parts of the organization just to avoid having a difficult conversation. It's a passive-aggressive solution that is actually just exporting dysfunction. Instead of addressing the behavior head-on, the problem gets rebranded as a promotion and passed on to another team that now has to manage what you wouldn’t. It may help in the short term, but what it does is damage your personal leader brand and leave you with: - Broken trust within your team - Damage to your credibility - A ripple effect of lowered morale wherever that person lands Avoiding difficult conversations doesn’t protect anyone; it prolongs harm. It also assumes that people can't improve if they receive feedback, coaching, and support. I won't pretend that having difficult conversations is fun, but they are necessary and an important part of your growth as a leader. - You can be kind and still hold people accountable - You can be respectful and still name what isn’t working - You can lead with empathy and still make tough calls I love coaching the big stage moments, but it's the everyday public speaking opportunities that make the biggest difference for leaders. If you tend to avoid difficult conversations, here are 3 quick tips to navigate them with more confidence: 1. Address issues early. The longer you wait, the harder it gets for you and everyone around you. Allowing bad behavior (even if it is getting good results) creates a toxic environment and makes it difficult to do good work. 2. Prep for the conversation. You want to name the key behaviors that need to be addressed, the impact it’s having, and the outcome you’re looking for. Stay focused on actions and not personality traits. 3. Practice in a safe space. If you anticipate resistance or pushback, rehearse your delivery with someone you trust. Get feedback on your tone and clarity before you step into the real conversation. Bonus tip: If emotions run high on either side, it’s okay to pause. Step away, regroup, and return when both sides are ready for a productive conversation. Just don't pause for too long; it is critical that you give feedback as close to the incident as possible.

🔥 How to Handle a Difficult Conversation as a Leader 🔥 Difficult conversations are one of the toughest parts of leadership but also one of the most important. The key isn’t just delivering bad news and walking away, but staying engaged, even when it’s uncomfortable. I recently wrote about this in my Harvard Business Review article, “How to Talk to an Employee Who Isn’t Meeting Expectations,” where I shared strategies to turn these moments into opportunities for growth. As an executive coach and advisor, I work with leaders navigating these conversations every day. Here are four things to keep in mind to make the discussion more productive: 👉 Set the stage for collaboration Approach it as a partnership. Start with alignment: “My goal is to provide clear feedback and ensure we are collectively working toward your development.” 👉 Encourage self-reflection Invite them to assess their own performance. “Looking back, what’s working well? What would you improve?” This helps shift the mindset from blame to growth. 👉 Deliver feedback with clarity Be specific and avoid ambiguity. Focus on observed behaviors, not assumptions. Instead of “You’re not engaged,” say: “I’ve noticed you’re quieter in meetings, and team members think you are disconnected.” 👉 Reset expectations and look ahead Frame the conversation around the future. Instead of focusing on what went wrong, ask: “How would you handle this situation differently next time?” Difficult conversations don’t have to feel like confrontations. When approached with preparation, empathy, and a focus on growth, they can be transformative strengthening both performance and trust. Please share in the comments, what strategies have helped you navigate tough conversations? ⬇️ 📖 Read my full HBR article here: https://lnkd.in/eMuV9eWp #Leadership #Coaching #Feedback #FutureOfWork #GrowthMindset #Careers #Thinkers50 #Coach #Professor #Advisor #MG100 #BestAdvice #JennyFernandez

Avoided tough conversations? I get why. They’re uncomfortable, messy, and sometimes downright scary. But here’s what I’ve learned: those conversations hold incredible power. Think about this: → You’re stuck managing team conflicts, but avoiding direct discussions. → You’re negotiating deals, but hesitating on asking for what you really want. → You’re chasing growth, but dodging feedback that could change everything. I’ve been there. Years ago, I avoided addressing tough truths with clients and my team. I thought staying “safe” and avoiding friction was better for relationships. 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙞𝙡𝙚𝙧 𝙖𝙡𝙚𝙧𝙩: 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙬𝙧𝙤𝙣𝙜. What happened instead? → Misunderstandings piled up. → Trust eroded. → Progress stalled. Here’s what shifted everything: I decided discomfort wasn’t my enemy. I leaned 𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙤 those tough conversations. Here’s how: ✅ Prepare with empathy: Understand their perspective before speaking. ✅ Lead with clarity: Say what needs saying, without sugarcoated distractions. ✅ Focus on outcomes: Frame conversations around solutions, not blame. Was I nervous? Absolutely. But here’s what happened next: → Relationships grew stronger because people felt heard. → Deals closed faster because objections were addressed upfront. → My team started thriving because issues weren’t left unresolved. Facing discomfort didn’t just solve problems—it unlocked breakthroughs. Today, every tough conversation feels like an opportunity. An opportunity for growth, connection, and clarity. Avoid discomfort, and you’ll miss out on all that. Lean 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗼 discomfort, and you’ll find your breakthroughs waiting. What’s your go-to strategy for tackling tough conversations? Let’s share insights that help us all grow.

When we speak to older donors about why they give (or don't give), one of the most worrying emotions we uncover is a sense of learned hopelessness - particularly when it comes to medical causes. "There have been so many false dawns - so many promises - I've given up hoping – it's too late for me." To help illustrate this, I've gone back through the advertising archives to show how for 125 years, fundraising advertising for cancer research was driven by the same promise - one day science will cure cancer. Then in 2023, Cancer Research UK did something different. Instead of promising future breakthroughs, they showed patients and researchers celebrating them RIGHT NOW. The result? A huge jump in legacy income. Are they related? I'd love to know more about the campaign. I don't work with CRUK. But to my mind, this is what happens when you understand donor psychology. From speaking with donors, here's what I think CRUK got right... – They didn't just show suffering – They showed success – They didn't ask for sympathy – They invited collective action – They didn't promise "one day". They said "today" And they weren't afraid of asking. The fact is no campaign – no brand – can ever land clean. When you start at a charity, you inherit decades of promises made by people who are long gone. You can rebrand all you want – new logo, fresh colours, modern fonts – but you can't escape the impact of generations of personal experience and appeal messages. CRUK acknowledged that history. And changed the narrative within it. From "one day" to "today." From promise to proof. From hopelessness to hope. Three things to learn from this... 1. Your long-term donors might not give because they don't care – they may have heard the same promise for decades and stopped believing it. 2. Brand agencies tend to think emotion = sympathy. But hope, pride, and collective efficacy are more powerful for sustained giving. 3. Stop separating "brand campaigns" from "fundraising campaigns." They're the same thing and should be doing the same job. This is what integration actually looks like. It's understanding why people give and what the barriers are - they are both important. If you want to find out more, there a detailed analysis in the comments where I look at advertising going back to 1899, focus on why we have to consider the power of collective action, consider why no campaign ever lands clean and share a number of lessons - for any charity on any budget. #Fundraising #DonorPsychology #charityBranding

The fundraising sector has been getting it wrong for decades. We've created an artificial hierarchy in philanthropy. We put donors on pedestals. We approach them with trepidation. We treat them as untouchable. And it's killing authentic connection. Here's what I discovered after a decade in fundraising: The moment you elevate someone to "donor status," you've already lost. Why? Because you've created a power dynamic that: -Breeds anxiety -Blocks genuine conversation -Builds invisible walls -Breaks down trust The solution isn't another strategy. It's dismantling this hierarchy entirely. I tested this theory: What if we approached every "donor meeting" as simply connecting with a friend? Here's what changed: -Conversations became more natural -Questions flowed easily -Follow-ups felt genuine Understanding deepened on both sides Think about it: When was the last time you felt anxious about calling a friend? When did you last rehearse a coffee chat with someone you trust? Here's your challenge: For your next five conversations, remove "donor" from your vocabulary. Watch what happens. Takeway: The future of philanthropy isn't about perfecting the ask. It's about humanising the relationship.

Why do people give? It's the million-dollar question in fundraising (sometimes literally). We often focus on the 'how' of fundraising, but understanding the 'why' can be transformative. After years of studying donor behavior, here's an insight that might surprise you: People don't give to the neediest causes. They give to the causes that make them feel needed. Let that sink in for a moment. This isn't about manipulation—it's about tapping into fundamental human psychology. We all want to feel that our actions matter, that we can make a difference. So, how do we apply this insight? 1. Frame your ask as an invitation, not a plea Instead of "We need your help," try "Your support can make this happen." 2. Be specific about impact Don't just say "Your donation helps." Say "Your $100 provides a week of meals for a family." 3. Offer meaningful involvement Beyond money, invite donors to contribute ideas, volunteer, or spread the word. 4. Celebrate the donor's role In your impact reports, make the donor the hero of the story. 5. Create exclusive opportunities Offer behind-the-scenes looks or special events that make donors feel like insiders. Remember, at its core, philanthropy is about love for humanity. By making donors feel needed, we're not just raising money—we're nurturing that love and creating a community of engaged supporters. Now, I'm curious: What's the most surprising donor motivation you've encountered in your work? Share your story in the comments. Your experience could provide valuable insights for all of us in understanding the complex psychology of giving!

When you step into a negotiation, which one are you leading with? I recently came across a simple but profound line: “𝘕𝘦𝘨𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘦𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘰𝘯 𝘱𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘰𝘳 𝘷𝘢𝘭𝘶𝘦.” And it hit me hard. Too often, we enter negotiations hoping someone will understand our need—our situation, our struggle. But need doesn’t close deals. Value does. When you lead with clear, undeniable value, the entire conversation shifts. It’s not about asking for what you want; it’s about showing why what you bring deserves it. That requires: • Doing the work to understand your unique edge • Framing your ask around the problem you solve • Showing the impact you consistently deliver Whether it’s a salary, a contract, or a partnership, don’t appeal for sympathy. Communicate your value. It’s a mindset shift that changes outcomes. Are you ready to lead your next negotiation from a place of value?

Fundraising isn’t just about strategy. It’s about 𝗽𝘀𝘆𝗰𝗵𝗼𝗹𝗼𝗴𝘆. Because behind every donor is a person asking questions they may not say out loud: “Will this make a difference?” “Can I trust you?” “Will this gift reflect who I am?” You don’t need a degree in neuroscience. But you 𝘥𝘰 need to understand how humans think. It should be known as 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘂𝗻𝘀𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝗮𝗱𝘃𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗲— the fundraiser who studies people wins more than the one who just studies tactics. Here’s why: 𝗣𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝗴𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹 𝗲𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗱 Logic justifies. Emotion 𝘥𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴 the decision. 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗼, 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽𝗲𝗿 Talk less about what your org is doing. Talk more about what 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 can make happen. 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝗰𝗹𝗮𝗿𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗯𝗲𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 Too many choices? Vague language? Confusion? That’s a fast track to no gift at all. 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗲𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝘀𝗲𝗹𝘃𝗲𝘀 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆 “People like me give to things like this.” Make it personal. Make it 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 familiar. When you understand what moves people, you stop guessing. You start connecting. And connection is what makes your next appeal 𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘰𝘳𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦. 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗱𝘆𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗱𝗼𝗻𝗼𝗿𝘀—𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗮—𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗿?

I See Myself in Your Mission: The Hidden Psychology of Donor Loyalty Yesterday, I had a conversation with a major donor on behalf of a client that really drove home something crucial about donor loyalty - it's all about identity and shared values. She said: 'I don't just give to your organization. I see myself in your mission.' This perfectly aligns with what research tells us: Donors stick with organizations that reflect their personal values and help them express who they are (or who they aspire to be). Think about your most loyal donors. They're not just supporting your cause - they're affirming their identity through their giving. Questions to consider: -How well do we really understand our donors' self-perception? -Are we helping them see themselves in our story? -What specific touchpoints reinforce this connection? Let me share a quick story: I recently assisted a client revamp their donor communications to focus less on what they do and more on who their donors are - the values they hold, the change they want to see in the world. The response was incredible. What's your experience? How do you help donors see themselves as part of your mission, not just supporters of it? Would love to hear specific examples that have worked (or failed!) in your organizations. #NonprofitBranding #DonorEngagement #FundraisingTips